At Least Somebody Honored The Texas T-Rex's Ass Cheeks
The Independent Spirit Awards did what the Oscars failed to do: give respect to Matthew McConaughey's rock hard ass cutlets. At yesterday's Independent Spirit Awards in Santa Monica, the Texas T-Rex won Best Supporting Actor for popping his bulge in a Speedo and throwing his charbroiled nalgas up in the air in Magic Mike. While accepting his award Matthew, who is still looking a lollipop-headed giraffe, let every actor know that if they want to win an Independent Spirit Award next year, they have to take all them panties off:
"I had to take my pants off to win a trophy, I had to drop trou to win an award. Fuck yeah!"
Sadly, the Independent Spirit Awards didn't honor the OTHER great performance of the year: Nicole Kidman's piss hole for letting out a Botox-infused pee stream on Zac Efron's body in The Paperboy.
The reboot of Jerry Maguire called Silver Linings Playbook pretty much swept that shit last night and picked up a bunch of trophies. Here's the list of winners:
Best Feature - Silver Linings Playbook
Best First Feature - Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being A Wallflower
Best Supporting Male Performance - The Texas T-Rex, Magic Mike
Best Supporting Female Performance - Helen Hunt, The Sessions
Best International Film - Amour
Best Female Lead Performance - Jennifer Lawrence, Silver Linings Playbook
Best Male Lead Performance - John Hawkes, Battery Dying
Best Screenplay - David O. Russell, Silver Linings Playbook
Best Cinematography - Ben Richardson, Beasts of the Southern Wild
Best Director - David O. Russell, Silver Linings Playbook
Best Documentary - The Invisible War
And here's a few pictures for you to put your eyes on. In order: Texas T-Rex with Camila Alves, Bradley Cooper (and yes, I stared at his baggy camel toe for at least an hour straight), Bryan Cranston, Laura Dern, Salma Hayek with her billionaire husband, Helen Hunt, Jennifer Lawrence, the new Jodie Foster, Aubrey Plaza, DanRad, new daddy Jeremy Renner (who let everyone know that the musky scent was coming from his crotch), Zoe Saldana, Andy Samberg with Joanna Newsom, the new Annie and Kerry Washington.
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BCoop's wearing recycled lazy-boy while Helen Hunt looks like a caricature of herself.
I miss old Hollywood. These people don't do it for me.
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Who are you calling silly cow?
if Matthew should have won an award for something it should have been for his role in PAPERBOY and not that hot mess that was MAGIC MIKE..i could barely keep my eyes open with MM when his role in PPB was far more the right kind of edgy and even if we didn't quite see all the way up(down?) to his brown eye there I think his butt cheeks showed more depth in those compromising submission positions(in PPB)..
Jeremy Renner needs his ass smacked .....always acts like such a baby everywhere he goes.
Yeah for Indie flicks! I love the IFC.
Salma's catching up to her purse-selling baby daddy's age.
*****
Walking on a Dream
I think B Coop picked that hair piece out of B Affleck's trash can.
What is Renner doing? And LoL at T-Rex with his "rock hard ass cutlets" which I am sure he lost when he took all that weight off. Now they're flat pancake meatballs.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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My God it hurts to see Laura Dern these days. She was so fucking hot as Lula, back when her youth forgave a mediocre face.
Aging ain't just a bitch, it's a raging cunt.
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"Buy the ticket, take the ride" ~ Hunter S. Thompson
John Hawkes, won best actor for The Sessions not some movie named "Battery Dying". I think that was just some message that came up on the reporter's cell phone. Hawkes deserved the award. He deserved to be nominated for an Oscar, but he's not a "known" name. Damn good actor.
I love Bryan Cranston. That's all.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Little Q is simply adorable.....love the anti Oscars but still. It was all about Silver Linings but still it was more fun than the snobby Oscars
My girl, Q, is adorable is always. LOVE that she's age-approoriate.
Wow. Renner's expression isn't helping with the gay rumors. Between that & his overly-groomed eyebrows, and glorious lashes, it just screams 'gay'. Also, why doesn't he go with brown mascara to match his hair? It looks like he used 'blackest black', like I do :).
Submitted by El Bastardo on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 5:12pm.
lol!
poor Helen
Submitted by El Bastardo on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 5:12pm.
H Hunt 8D
Your knob shrank back into its jacket?
Salma seems to be missing half her boobage here. Helen is missing half her hair. TRex is missing a body and lifelike appearance. Laura Dern looks like she was dressed by Kanye. Jeez, they all look like shit..... except for Camilla who always looks stunning but for some reason, dumb and annoying.
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"I don't know anything about this Justin the beaver" - Miss Kay from Duck Dynasty
Jeremy Renner...the inner Mango is strong in this one
Now is the time. You're not promised tomorrow. -PR
Texas T Rex wins an award for Magic Mike?? No wonder I don't go to the movies anymore.
LOL at MK being mesmerized by BCoop's one saggy ball!
Salma Hayek is gorgeous.
+++++++++++++++++++
Submitted by Migraineuse on Fri, 09/14/2012 - 6:22pm.
All females belong to the sex class; they are subhuman buckets for male incontinence.
Jeremy Renner gets uglier every time we see him - what an unfortunate looking bitch. Bradley Cooper looks like a Sasquatch's asshole.
I know Salma is beautiful, but in these pictures she is starting to look a little "well preserved society matron" but I am looking on my phone so who knows.
Submitted by bitchSpray on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 5:02pm.
was this some kind of awards for poor people? because all of them are dressed like shit
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the awards are held in a tent on the beach, and they are the Independent Spirit awards, they're supposed to be for indie movies so it is sort of considered taboo to wear A-list designer outfits because a lot of the nominees literally can't afford or don't have access to those clothes.
Yes. I would . TRex arms and all. He is tall and blonde with blue eyes . It's been almost 20 years since I had one of that variety , so yeah. No shame.
Submitted by BaconSlut on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 5:14pm.
@ElB
LMAO! You hor.
WHAT? My keyboard doesn't do stars....wait, *** shit, coulda used them :)
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"Jesus loves you" - Great thing to hear in a Church but horrific to hear in a Mexican prison
@ElB
LMAO! You hor.
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Submitted by RichBitch on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:28pm.
Submitted by mike on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:05pm.
What's wrong with Renner's eyes? Is he wearing makeup?
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Yes, I refer you to my earlier post:
"Jeremy Renner needs to quit it with the Maybelline."
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Maybe he just needs to stop buying his make-up at the drug store and get some quality fards.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
It may look sexist but this is how I rate them.
Camila Alves 8=========D
Salma Hayek 8====================D~~~~~~~~~~~
Zoe Saldana 8=========D
K Washington 8=====D
Laura Dern 8========D
J Lawrence 8=======D
H Hunt 8D
*Salma always wins*
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"Jesus loves you" - Great thing to hear in a Church but horrific to hear in a Mexican prison
was this some kind of awards for poor people? because all of them are dressed like shit
Submitted by saltydog on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:53pm.
Can we all agree Aubrey Plaza is awesome and looks pretty great here? I saw Safety Not Guaranteed and thought it was pretty darn cute.
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Yeah, she looks adorable. Camilla Alves is looking a little Kim Kardashian-y in the face.
EdDallas-I like your theory.
Submitted by Dgrin on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:55pm.
am i the only one who finds B.Coop's hairline a bit "suspicious"?
^^^^^^^^^^^^
I think I saw it on last week's "America's Most Wanted".
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
T-Rex's wife is absolutely stunningly gorgeous. Wow.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Possum on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:52pm.
Helen, why you no wear bangs? You have a 10-head.
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I think sometimes that bangs make it more obvious that somebody has a big forehead, especially when it is one of those more rounded big foreheads like hers.
am i the only one who finds B.Coop's hairline a bit "suspicious"?
Can we all agree Aubrey Plaza is awesome and looks pretty great here? I saw Safety Not Guaranteed and thought it was pretty darn cute.
I don't believe that she is average looking....and there are "average" looking women who have been successful in the industry.
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Every saint has a past and
Every sinner has a future
Helen, why you no wear bangs? You have a 10-head.
I have to say T-Rex her has gained a bit of respect from me. The guy is a health freak that spends a great deal of time keeping in shape and for him it's a total lifestyle and mindset. It has to take a hell of a lot of willpower to put your vanity and health aside for a role. Losing weight I would think is hard enough nevermind losing THAT much weight. It would take 6-8 months to lose that weight? Can you imagine being so bloody hungry day after week after month AND you still need the energy to shoot 14 hour days on set and remember your lines, develop a character and all the while there is food all around you. You gotta think that takes....something most people don't have no?
Submitted by Hotmami on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:37pm.
Submitted by can be a pushy broad on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:28pm.
Jennifer Lawrence might be very trim for that Hunger Games movie?
Totally possible, but if anything, she would have been thinnest for the first movie. I hope she doesn't go too Hollywood...
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she doesn't look that much thinner to me compared to how she looked in the red dress at the 2011 Oscars. I think she still looks really healthy, I would describe her as thin and in shape, not skinny.
@HotMama, hope she doesn't either but seems to be very rare.
Off to watch TV. Kelly and Rancik's dresses are really nice ugh
Have fun everyone talking. Hope MK joins you.
I don't know who looks more methy these day - Matt Mc or Ethan Hawke. Those boys are not taking care of themselves.
Submitted by Hotmami on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:37pm.
Submitted by can be a pushy broad on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:28pm.
Jennifer Lawrence might be very trim for that Hunger Games movie?
Totally possible, but if anything, she would have been thinnest for the first movie. I hope she doesn't go too Hollywood...
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She will if she want's to stay in the movies...and she knows that...which explains the weight loss already. Look at the thumb images...this bitch is average on every scale. Nothing wrong with being average looking but that doesn't fly long-term in the industry.
Even with facial hair, BCoop still manages to look super ghey.
Get that award Matthew!
Submitted by can be a pushy broad on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:28pm.
Jennifer Lawrence might be very trim for that Hunger Games movie?
Totally possible, but if anything, she would have been thinnest for the first movie. I hope she doesn't go too Hollywood...
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Every saint has a past and
Every sinner has a future
Submitted by RichBitch on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:28pm.
Sorry, didn't see it.
Good Day, RichBitch!
Submitted by saltydog on Sun, 02/24/2013 - 4:15pm.
Also doesn't it go against the whole point of the Independent Spirit awards when a Weinsten backed film staring past Oscar winners and nominees who regularly receive multi-million dollar pay-days win everything?
Very much so.
he does not look right.
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvDQy53eldY
Jeremy Renner started out as a MAKEUP ARTIST!!
You'd think she'd know how to apply that shit better. Maybe his "roommate" wasn't there to powder his face. My NaNa wears less foundation and blush than this queen.
My theory: Jeremy has a partner. Model had a baby for them. That makes a hell of a lot more sense than, "Former makeup artist turned Action Movie Star, Jeremy Renner, is banging a hot model and got her knocked up. He decided to move her in with him and his roommate."
Picture 18? Guuuurl! Not judging but how stupid do they think people are?
Jennifer Lawrence might be very trim for that Hunger Games movie?