Holly Madison Can't Wait To Eat Her Placenta
And now it's time for everyone's favorite topic: PLACENTA EATING! This is the perfect story for me to type about in between taking bites of the cold, medium rare steak leftover from last night's dinner.
Hugh Hefner's former number one ho, Holly Madison, is birthing out a baby daughter any day now and she writes on her blog (via UsWeekly) that she plans to swallow down her womb meat after giving birth. No, Holly isn't having her placenta turned into jerky and she's not planning to use it to make a uterus daiquiri (ingredients: placenta, ice, rum and hummingbird juice). Holly says that she's going to have her placenta turned into pills. Personally, this isn't gross to me at all considering that Holly has swallowed things that were a billion times more disgusting while munching on Hef's butt. Holly wrote this:
This might sound gross, but I’m totally planning on having my placenta turned into pills I can take after giving birth. I heard it helps women recover faster and I want to recover as quickly as I can!
Have any other moms out there done this?
xoxo,
Holly
Holly must've been talking to January Jones, because my new favorite home wrecking legend tells Glamour UK (via DM) that although she regrets telling everybody about eating her own uterus carne, she thinks that every pregnant chick should do it.
"I should never have told anyone about that. But it’s not gross or witchcrafty. Nor am I putting it in a shake or eating it raw. It’s a very civilised thing that can help women with depression or fatigue. I was never depressed or sad or down after the baby was born, so I’d highly suggest it to any pregnant woman."
So if you had the post-baby sads in a bad way after giving birth, it's because you didn't swallow down a box full of Placentaburger Helper. January also went on to say that if taking placenta pills doesn't help with your depression, just follow your baby daddy's wife to the grocery store, find her in the produce section, go up to her and while you're stroking your bald baby's head, say to her, "Isn't he beautiful. He has your husband's eyes, bitch." It'll take you higher every single time.
Here's Holly at some event in Las Vegas the other day and January in Glamour UK.
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but anyway...she looks pretty, but I find that hair colour dated.
Help me. We just had a friend come back from China. He goes all the time and has lots of horror stories with video to back it up. This time he was eating with some chinese people he was working with and they offered him baby. I couldn't believe it. They said it was from a woman who aborted or miscarried. Do you think they mean placenta and it just got lost in translation. I mean...they eat a lot of fucked up shit in China...skin animals alive and torture dogs because they believe the meat tastes better if they die in fear. But this??? Something is wrong here. This is out in the country and it is a weirder there than in the city, but can this be true? Has anyone else heard of this?
I have had three babies (94, 97, 2005) and I couldn't have done anything with the placenta if I'd wanted to. Each time I was told that it was standard procedure for the placenta to be sent to the lab and biopsied and then discarded. ???? (This is in Illinois)
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
This is how to dress during pregnancy!
* sideeyes Kimye* Holly looks lovely.
Nah, I have kids and to me Holly's talk of placenta-noshing is silly and pretentious. Taking an iron supplement and/or prenatal vitamins won't keep her in the headlines. She's a cute preggo though, IMO
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And when Shirley belted out, Beyonce's wig blew off. - MK 2/24/2013
When I lived in the Hollywood Hills years ago, I happened to be invited to this really cool hippie looking house, kind of a neighborhood event situation, and they had a tree inside the house and the owner says "Oh yeah, all my kid's placentas are buried under here... " I said, "Really, how interesting. Well, I think I need to get some air" and just got the fuck out of there before I could laugh in his face. And I was born and raised here, this shouldn't shock me, but I just find the concept so fucking pretentious... maybe because I don't have kids?
Apparently this is something only the witty ones do, like January Jones and Holly Madison.
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2 for the price of 3!
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 7:40pm.
I always thought she was lying about her age, but it seems like she's had that old face from a young age.
I also heard that a nice smoothie with your dandruff cures schizophrenia and prevents hangnails.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
I had to Google how much this ridiculousness costs. There isn't one "placenta pill maker" that does it for under 250. And iron over the counter is about 5 bucks.
I don't get the hype over January Jones..she's quite homely and is far from 'beautiful' or 'pretty'.
She obviously has to much money. Why would you bother? I have no idea who this bitch is and I don't care.
She looks really beautiful actually. Love her hair color and the red dress.
This woman has been pregnant for the longest !! Thought she birthed last year!
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
Submitted by Athina on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 7:34pm.
Spoken like dumb fucks who have waaaaayyy too much time on their hands, and too much money for their own good. And by they way, this stupid ho is not fooling anyone into believing that dishwater blonde is her natural color. Her natural color is nearly as dark as a Kardashian with her black-brown eyes. Bitch just laid off the bleach and started using Miss Clairol #8 in ash blonde.
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You are correct!
http://www.pynkcelebrity.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/holly-madison.jp...
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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson
Spoken like dumb fucks who have waaaaayyy too much time on their hands, and too much money for their own good. And by they way, this stupid ho is not fooling anyone into believing that dishwater blonde is her natural color. Her natural color is nearly as dark as a Kardashian with her black-brown eyes. Bitch just laid off the bleach and started using Miss Clairol #8 in ash blonde.
What about the BABIES? What should they take to recover from the birth and afterbirth? Just take some vitamins ladies, and forget about it.
And "uterus carne"? hahahahahaha hahahhahahahah hahahahahahhahaha hahahahahahaha
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Dlisted is a finalist! http://2013.bloggi.es/ Voting closes March 17.
Having your placenta turned into a little white pill is the most pussy ass definition of "eating" it I've ever heard.
Bridgjones....me either. But I almost died that day when he said that. And I was very good friends with him AND his gf. :O
I never looked at either of them the same way.
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
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RIMADYL KILLS
Submitted by bridgjones on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 5:41pm.
Submitted by Mel-Tang on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 5:37pm.
One-liner....do I know you??? Lol
I was friends with a guy in college that told me he LOVED to give oral sex to his gf when she was on her period. He said he craved the taste of her blood, and liked it even more when it was chunky and had clots in it.
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Very little grosses me out, but that just did it.
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I dont know Mel, maybe you do! and WOW ok, the smell alone...not a pretty thing...Barf
********* SAVE A LIFE. ADOPT A PET *********
"When I need a laugh I'll take Bob Saget Thank you very much!" - Ned Flanders
Submitted by Mel-Tang on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 5:37pm.
One-liner....do I know you??? Lol
I was friends with a guy in college that told me he LOVED to give oral sex to his gf when she was on her period. He said he craved the taste of her blood, and liked it even more when it was chunky and had clots in it.
^^^^^^^^^^
Very little grosses me out, but that just did it.
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"Buy a vibrator bitch, drink wine and stay home." - Craigypants 1/22/2013
No shade. As long as it's not hurting the baby, fuck it, do what you want.
I popped in to say she is a very pretty pg woman. I looked like three piles of shit when I was preggo.
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"Buy a vibrator bitch, drink wine and stay home." - Craigypants 1/22/2013
One-liner....do I know you??? Lol
I was friends with a guy in college that told me he LOVED to give oral sex to his gf when she was on her period. He said he craved the taste of her blood, and liked it even more when it was chunky and had clots in it.
Omg I just made myself sick rehashing that story.
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
Does it work if you eat someone else's placenta?
I barely graduated with a GED, but this is voodoo science. There's nothing in placenta that you couldn't readily get from some other source.
And if you're as smart and hip as Holly and January, then do it for real and eat the bloody mess, not after it's been diluted, sanitized, and flavored into pills.
Not a big deal.
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 5:12pm.
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Ahh, yes! lol. You know you are dealing with a quack as soon as talk of "full moon" comes about. In my experiences anyway.
I craved malt vinegar in my pregnancies (I would sip it from a bottle) and I craved cigars. I would dream about eating them and my husband had one to celebrate something and I had to force myself not to eat the butt. I was obsessed with eating cigars, especially one that had been smoked. I never gave into it but dreaded being 4 months along and knowing the craving was 5 months to go. The instant I gave birth, the idea was vile to me.
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Dark-sided!
Dainee, but you have to use the vag fluids from masturbating when its full moon. Its in the details...
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 5:06pm.
DK, mike, i googled it and it says it`s sicilian as well as african american Hoodoo belief that the bloodthing works.
http://www.luckymojo.com/bodyfluids.html
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OMG!!
"....vaginal fluids make a good substitute for menstrual blood in coffee or tea"
I guess when you don't have rice milk for your guests.
Submitted by NovaNightly on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 3:37pm.
They said that Britney Spears craved dirt when she was pregnant. HAHAHA...figures
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That's called *pica* and includes cravings during pregnancy for all kinds of *very* weird non-food things: soil (like Britters) clay, ashes, paint chips, coffee grounds etc. to name a few.
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*holds up glass for mike* Here darling. Have a Bloody Mary!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
I think this is the best I have ever seen her look.
Eh, whatever. Let her do it.
Beef marrow is delicious!
DK, mike, i googled it and it says it`s sicilian as well as african american Hoodoo belief that the bloodthing works.
http://www.luckymojo.com/bodyfluids.html
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Thu, 02/28/2013 -4:33pm.
HA HA HA HA HA! That is just TOO funny.
I am going to laugh on this one in the future.
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 4:33pm.
Reg. One-Liner, my husband did not eat Spaghetti at my house for two years after we met, worried i would mix Period blood in it and "trap" him. Mind you, my german ass had never heard of that bullshit until he told me about it. I d say as often as his face has been between my legs in the past 20 years, he had to have had at least a sampling of it by now...
*sits on bench with " I AM GROSS TODAY" sign*
Where does that belief originate?
Submitted by Daniee on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 4:43pm.
Well, at least she isn't taking the placenta of some animal like is sometimes practiced in Traditional Chinese Medicine. No harm done, really.
I seriously do not get it when people are so icked out by this, but yet will eat pork belly, calf liver etc. etc. Same goes with breast milk. You have been drinking milk from a cow's tit for years(I know..it's pasteurized), but human is gross?
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Well, I wouldn't eat a cow's placenta either.
Why is she famous? What has she done noteworthy?
Gross. What if you get the burps? I do placenta treatments on my hair once a month, though. It's in a little tube and looks like cream rinse. Makes your hair look lovely.
M.E- I have a Lil P too!
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 4:33pm.
Reg. One-Liner, my husband did not eat Spaghetti at my house for two years after we met, worried i would mix Period blood in it and "trap" him. Mind you, my german ass had never heard of that bullshit until he told me about it. I d say as often as his face has been between my legs in the past 20 years, he had to have had at least a sampling of it by now...
*sits on bench with " I AM GROSS TODAY" sign*
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Ha! love your comment, i guess that stuff works!
********* SAVE A LIFE. ADOPT A PET *********
"When I need a laugh I'll take Bob Saget Thank you very much!" - Ned Flanders
Well, at least she isn't taking the placenta of some animal like is sometimes practiced in Traditional Chinese Medicine. No harm done, really.
I seriously do not get it when people are so icked out by this, but yet will eat pork belly, calf liver etc. etc. Same goes with breast milk. You have been drinking milk from a cow's tit for years(I know..it's pasteurized), but human is gross?
When will I learn that I should NEVER read the D on my lunch break?
Educate yourself on the badass, not-fuck-giving honeybadger, Olivia! ~MK
Reg. One-Liner, my husband did not eat Spaghetti at my house for two years after we met, worried i would mix Period blood in it and "trap" him. Mind you, my german ass had never heard of that bullshit until he told me about it. I d say as often as his face has been between my legs in the past 20 years, he had to have had at least a sampling of it by now...
*sits on bench with " I AM GROSS TODAY" sign*
Submitted by que cochina on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 4:27pm.
My friend is a surgical RN and years ago, had a hippie lady patient who wanted to keep her ovaries following a full hysterectomy. She wanted to plant them in a symbolic gesture of parting with fertility. They couldn't give them to her as it constitutes transporting non-vital organs.
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That sounds like a lovely idea. It's a terrible shame they couldn't let her do it.
Hell, let her do whatever she wants to do. In Germany they make wrinkle creams and lipstick out of placentas, let her eat her own...
THIS SAD HO! Just stop, please - you are SO over!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by yepyepyep on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 3:17pm.
I hate these celebrities and their reasoning, well animals do it ! Well animals also eat their own young the fathers sometimes kill their own babies, bird sometimes let the runt starve to death, they eat worms they don't cook their meats or placentas
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And don't forget, lick their asses, eat other guys' poo...My friend is a surgical RN and years ago, had a hippie lady patient who wanted to keep her ovaries following a full hysterectomy. She wanted to plant them in a symbolic gesture of parting with fertility. They couldn't give them to her as it constitutes transporting non-vital organs.
She looks fantastic! That's all I got.
*"I got 99 problems, being a bitch ain't one!"*
-Courtney Love @ Sundance 2013
Yummy scrummy