Amanda Bynes Has A Friend…. That She Paid….To Be Her Friend

The time has possibly come for me to slide over to the side of the room that thinks Amanda Bynes has been trolling us all and the fuckery she’s been bringing is all part of an elaborate performance art piece co-produced by MoMA or some shit. Amanda followed up her nightmare-inducing primp video with a Tuesday afternoon stroll through NYC with her rent-a-friend. Even if I got high on whatever Amanda Bynes is getting high on, I couldn’t make this mess up.

The paparazzi say that the blonde girl in the green jacket waited for Amanda in front of her apartment building and then the two fake laughed, fake talked and fake bonded the way all fake friends do. The two did this for a while before they walked to an ATM and Amanda took out some cash which she then gave to her rent-a-friend. The rent-a-friend then went on her way to her next rent-a-friend gig.

I don’t even fucking know….

At first I thought blondie was Amanda’s dealer, but what kind of dealer walks around with you in front of the paps? But then again, what kind of rent-a-friend doesn’t ask for the money upfront, especially a professional friend who is dealing with Amanda Bynes? Amanda really needs to get her money back and leave a bad Yelp review, because that rent-a-friend did not do her job. Rent-a-friends don’t let client friends do themselves up like a white trash Nicki Minaj. Rent-a-friends don’t let client friends hire rent-a-friends to put on a show in front of the paps. Rent-a-friends don’t let client friends paint a pair of lazy, busted down chola brows onto their face. And finally, rent-a-friends don’t let client friends do crazy shit like this.

I need to hire a rent-a-friend to tell me what to think of this shit.