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Tori Spelling is not wearing her unborn baby well. Pigtails are not hot on 65-year-old women. Homegirl and her husband are seen here taking a walk in Los Angeles on 11/22. I'm not sure when Tori is due, but if she can't afford the brat she can give itto me. I'm going to need Dr. 90210 on standby to fix the baby's face though. I'm joking! All babies are beautiful...blah..blah..blah

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Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie spent their Thanksgiving in Vietnam visiting orphans and causing a frenzy everywhere they went. Brad cause you a mini-lift though, he's looking a little beat. That being said, I'd hit them both at the same time.

Parasite Hilton and Nicole Richie have continued their "Gross Everyone Out" tour by shopping and eating fried chicken in Los Angeles on 11/22. Ewww, they eat like vikings. Nicole probably sput her chicken out into Paris' bagina after this.

Helen Mirren is October's HS of the Month! I know I'm way behind on this, but I'm still stuffed from stuffing my fat face. Helen barely beat out Bette Midler! Thanks to all who voted!!

Helen Mirren - 1997 votes
Bette Midler - 1530 votes
Lily Allen - 1270 votes
Jennifer Saunders - 1244 votes
Charlene Tilton - 392 votes

The KKKramer hecklers go on TV and are kind of stupid - ONTD

Celebrities change their faces fast - Cityrag

Blohan is losing her mind - Egotastic!

Kurt Cobain wasn't the one for Court - Hollywood Rag

Nancy Grace gets served - A Socialite's Life

Plastered tits - Hollywood Tuna

Carmen keeps it cool- Popsugar

Prince Harry must be hung - Just Jared

Alyssa Milano's stretched out chest - Drunken Stepfather

KFed knows very well he isn't loved - SOW

Best Thanksgiving picture ever - IDLYITW

KFed partied with his brother, Chris Federline, at ANOTHER album release party in Las Vegas last night. Um..KFed no matter how many release parties you have, it's still not going to save your album. His brother is sort of hot though, right? I'd hit it. I'd be the cheese in a Federline grilled cheese. Sick.

Pete Doherty has found himself in rehab again after being arrested for being caught with crack last week. He has apparently been checked into a clinic in Portugal and will have the drug naltrexone, which reduces the craving for , implanted in his abdomen at the clinic at Oeiras, an oceanside suburb of Lisbon. Petey arrived last Tuesday.

Um...they could drain his blood and give him a new brain and he'd still be a crackhead. Let's be real folks...he looks hot in a skirt though.

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Jake Gyllenhaal and Austin Nicholas reunited at a Lakers game last week. These two used to be TIGHT a few months ago, but haven't been seen together in a while. Finally their hearts reunited and they are now free to be together. Jake looks happy, but Austin looks over it. He's already had that ass.

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"It's blood money, but it's no different than any of the other writers who did books on this case."

When it was announced that Jessica Simpson was starring in a remake of the classic film, "Working Girl" many people were pissed off. It was reported that Jessica Simpson would star alongside Luke Wilson in a film about a small-town girl that climbs her way up the corporate ladder. Jessica has laughed off reports that it's a remake.

She said, "I don't know where those rumours came from. I'm making a film called 'Blonde Ambition' that I'm doing with Luke Wilson. It's along the same lines as 'Working Girl'. A small town girl moving to New York and turning into a great businesswoman."

The film starts shooting next year in Louisiana. Jessica as a businesswoman?! What kind of business is this character in, porn? Please, when is Hollywood going to learn that this ho is box office POISON?! She needs to stick with what she's good at...which is...um..which is...well...shark bait maybe?

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