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Brooke Hogan: Um...errr...um...well..um...MERCY!

Hilary Duff and Joel Madden have apparently called it quits. Joel was in Chicago last week and told everyone at Enclave, where he was DJing, that he was single and ready to mingle. He apparently said that their 8-year age difference was a major problem. He's 27 and she's 19.

The two began dating...oh who cares?! He probably got sick of her horse-teeth getting in the way if I ain't being too subtle!

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While Sly Stallone filmed Rocky Balboa, he kept his prick in his pants. He put himself on a sex-ban, because he's like a real fighter.

The 60-year-old said, "There is only so much energy in the body and I know some athletes in the film didn't adhere to the ban, but I did because I knew it was the only way. I hear David Beckham says he doesn't, but maybe he's the exception. The people I know who fight all stick to a sex ban because if they don't they lose."

Ewww, his wang is probably like Play-doh and that's not hot. That being said...I'd still suck it like a champ til it got hard. He probably jizzes Ensure.

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To Catch a Predator!

This is a video from Bossip which shows Will Smith planting one on his son during an Oprah taping. They are doing the rounds to promote "In Pursuit of Happyness" which they both star in.

Oh, Will is just being very friendly...with his son....in the mouth. It's wholesome fun!

First of all, thanks to all you for putting up with Dlisted today. It looks like Britney's gut over bagina has driven fear-seekers to this site and has crashed me several times. Sorry!

Speaking of gut over bagina, Paris Hilton's rep claims that their new relationship is a beautiful thing. He said that the two are forming a bond and becoming sisters. He said that Britney looks up to Paris and is grateful that she has taken her under her wing.

I say that Britney has finally signed a deal with the devil and there's no way back. She's so going to do The Simple Life and ruin her already in-the-gutter career. Paris is smart, because next to Britney she looks like an effin goddess. She probably tells her to wear those mini-skirts that show off Brit's tree trunk legs!

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How ironic that this sort of sexy photoshoot of Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock is going to be in January's GQ and they aren't even together anymore. They probably got a good look at each other in the daylight and realized it probably wasn't a good idea. It happens.

A Jessica Simpson sex tape?!? - A Socialite's Life

Brittany Murphy makes happy feet - Hollywood Tuna

James Wilke is cute but too bad his mother is a horse - Popsugar

Paris Hilton gets filled at the gas station - Hollywood Rag

Beyonce, jealous much? - IDLYITW

Nick Lachey likes trojans - Mollygood

Jessica chooses Paves over Miu Miu - Celebrity Nation

The Olsens on the Today Show - Just Jared

Sienna Miller likes it kinky - Egotastic!

Well, when it rains it pours. TMZ reports that Pamela Anderson has apparently filed for divorce from Kid Rock. They were married a quick minute or 4 months. Pam suffered a miscarriage, but that wasn't listed as the reason for divorce. The reason? He beat her ass. NO, kidding. It was irreconcilable differences.

That sucks, it was such a beautiful and elegant wedding! I'm sure Pam will celebrate by sucking Tommy-Lee-Dick!! Me too actually.

A reader sent me these pics and claim they are from this past Thanksgiving at Shar Jackson's house. Shar is one of KFed's baby mamas and she was apparently pissed off when KFed brought his new lady. I don't know anything about her, but rumor is that they have been dating for 3 weeks and might be one of the reasons for his split with Britney Spears.

Take this for what it's worth. The only thing I will say is that she looks like she's about to play Britney Spears in the porn-movie of her life.

Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears aka STD's Angels kiss and made up and created a paparazzi frenzy as they left a party early this morning. Brit showed off her tree trunk thighs and her saggy ass. Gross....seriously, she's a mom! How many STDs do you think are in these pictures?

Brit has totally done coke off of Linday's firecrotch.