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Jordan gave birth to a baby girl last week and although she hasn't told us her name, she is speaking to OK! Magazine about her new bundle of joy.

 

Jordan said, "I think all newborn babies are ugly. They look like little old men. I think they need a few weeks to grow into themselves. I remember Junior looked like he had a big nose. People go, 'Aw how cute' and I think, 'No, how ugly!'. It's very rare you find a cute one so young but Junior's gorgeous now."

Don't let her little girl hear that or she'll grow up, get a beat weave, dye herself orange and put melons in her chest. Oh wait, that might be a good thing in the Andre household.

 

Jordan needs to speak for her own! I was a beautiful newborn baby. A supermodel newborn baby. All the pedos wanted this. Ok, I'll stop.

 

Source

 

 

Johnny Knoxville filed for divorce today in a Los Angeles County court. Johnny and his wife Melanie cited "irreconcilable differences." The two have been married 12 years and have one daughter together. Johnny wants joint custody and will pay support. There was no pre-nup.

 

Johnny's (real name Philip John Clapp LOL)  lawyer signed the documents back in January, but it wasn't filed until today. The couple announced a separation back in February.

 

There's been a lot of rumors that this marriage has been over for several years. Johnny has been linked to Kate Moss, Jessica Simpson and other.

 

Clapp! He should've kept that last name. It's more fitting. I say good mittens! Melanie's better off. He can't be trusted. That being said, I'd knock boots with him anytime.

 

Source: TMZ

 

 

 

 

Helena Bonham Carter strikes me as one of those women that doesn't give a fuck what she wears as long as she likes it. I mean you would have to not give an eff if you wore that. It looks like it was taken from a homeless Victorian person. Did they have homeless people in Victorian times?

 

Helena just finished shooting Sweeney Todd where she played Mrs. Lovett. I'm guessing it's taking her a while to get out of character.

 

Here's Helena and that hot piece of man, Tim Burton, at today's Harry Potter premiere in London. 

 

 

 

 

Nick Lachey and Vanessa Manilafolders have returned from their Mexican vacation. This is the same Mexican vacation where scandalous pictures were taken of them in the jacuzzi. Nick and Vanessa got their lawyers on various internet sites and magazines threatening that if the photos are published, they will be sued.

 

Nick shrugged it off and told OK! Magazine, "Where's the scandal? I was in Mexico with my girlfriend of a year, celebrating our anniversary on a private vacation. It's not like I was caught with a Mexican hooker. We've all gone out and had a few too many and done something stupid. We've all made mistakes."

 

So if it's not a big deal, why are they making such a big deal about it? Oh, I see how it is. I bet the pictures are going to leak on accident, they are going to cry about it while secretly making a little money under the table. It's ok, everyone does it.

 

And he's right Vanessa is not a Mexican hooker! A hooker yes, but not a Mexican one.

 

 

 

 

Several media outlets have sworn up and down that Nicole Richie is knocked up. Add TMZ to that list. They are confirming her pregnancy through various sources. Nicole or Douche Madden have yet to comment. There's also rumors that the pair will get married this Summer.

 

Nicole faces DUI charges on July 11th and if convicted could spend 5 days in the slammer.

 

Nicole's rep of course would not comment.

 

I mean would should just confirm or deny it already. FUCK. She loves the attention. I mean, if it's true, just say it. She should also talk to Guinness, because that baby will be the smallest baby ever. Like the size of a lima bean.

 

This is going to get interesting.

 

 

 

Brody Jenner was spotted arriving and leaving Joseph's last night with Hilary and Haylie Duff. Could this be a new couple? BARF! I hope Hilary has enough taste not to get with that. Haylie should take what she can get, but Hilary has some dignity. I think.

 

Brody would've been super hot in like 1991.