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My Birthday Is In June
This gives you guys plenty of time to save your pennies. Hell, skip your afternoon Snicker break once a week and put that change into the MK Barfday fund. For what reason? You see, Pete Doherty is doing parties now! For just $200 Dreamboat will show up and perform on your special day. It all started when a father asked Pete to play his daughter's birthday party. His YOUNG daughter's birthday party. I'm not sure what that daddy was smoking, but that's probably how it all started. A conversation in a crack den!
A source told The Sun “The birthday girl’s dad told him she was a huge fan and that he’d give him £100 to perform at her party. Pete was flattered and happy to oblige. He turned up and played his big hits . Everyone had a great time."
The dad told a local paper and Dreamboat's agent has been bombarded with requests. This is a fucking steal! Celine Dion charges $6 million. Would Celine do a body shot on you? Probably not, but I bet you Dreamboat would. You would be laid up in the free clinic for a few days, but it would be worth it.
Pete Doherty playing his songs for a bunch of children sounds sweet. The love probably ended when the kids found out he sucked all the helium out of their balloons. Nothing ruins a Birthday party like saggy balloons.
Image: Fame Pictures
Thanks Guy
It's All The Rage
Rehab is getting fucking crowded. Pat O'Brien is trying the rehab thing again reports The Insider. They released this statement:
"The Insider" co-host PAT O'BRIEN has entered a rehabilitation facility for treatment. O'Brien and his doctors felt this is the best course for maintaining his sobriety.
Eva Mendes also returned to rehab today after a business break. Kiki Dunst is also in the tank. Someone check into rehab and find out what's going on with these people.
I'm disappointed that we didn't get more hot Pat O'Brien phone sex action before this rehab stint. Hearing coke growl saying, "I want to eat you. I want you to suck my cock" gets me every time.
Too Little Too Late
Ain't that a bitch! The U.S. government reversed its decision and granted Wino a visa to perform at the Grammys on Sunday reports People. The timing is all wrong, so Amy Wino will stick with the plan and still perform via satellite from London.
Her label said: "Unfortunately, due to the logistics involved and timing complications, Amy will not be coming to the U.S. this weekend to perform at the Grammys in Los Angeles, however she will still be performing via satellite broadcast from London as previously announced this morning. Amy would like to thank all of those people, and in particular the staff involved at the U.S. Embassy in London, who have all worked so hard to expedite her application. She is very sad not to be attending the prestigious awards in person, but wishes to express her heartfelt gratitude to all of those involved in the process."
They are just fucking with her now! Big teases. Giving her a visa at the last minute! They better not mess with that hot wreck. All the crack built up inside her will explode and they will be sorry.
The Work Of Kat Von D?
TMZ has a photograph allegedly signed by Kat Von D and addressed to her old boss at Miami Ink, Ami James, after she was fired by him. The photograph features a flaming Star of David, swastika with the words "burn in hell Jewbag" written on it. Nobody witnessed Kat write it, but they did witness her handing it over.
Ami said he went to TLC with it, but they basically ignored him. He had a lawyer brought in and TLC took the photo to a handwriting analyst who claimed there's a 99% chance Kat wrote it. TLC told TMZ that they did an investigation and Kat denied she wrote the message. They determined there was not enough evidence to punish anybody. Kat currently has a show, "L.A. Ink" on TLC.
Kat told TMZ, "The recent accusation of a publicity photo of me with offensive and anti-semitic comments and graphics allegedly written by me is completely false and unfounded, and clearly a forgery. This was already proven many months ago to be 100 percent untrue. I always have been, and will continue to be an advocate for tolerance of all races, religions and ways of life."
What a lovely message. All she's missing is hearts and stars. Whoever did it also showed off their artistic ability by connecting the signature with the swastika. I don't know. I'm not sure if Kat did this shit. She's a trashy bitch though. She was framed! Who framed Kat Von D? I'm sure this will be an upcoming "L.A. Ink" episode....during sweeps of course.
Accidental Overdose
The coroner's office reported today that Brad Renfro died from an accidental overdose. The cause of death was "acute heroin/morphine intoxication" and the drugs were injected. His death has been ruled an accident. Brad was found dead on January 15th in his home. He was 25.
TGIF!
I have been hungover all day and this video of this sexy bitch, La Pequeña Prohibida, has brought me back. I don't know what's going and I'm a little scared, but she's got me hypnotized. I feel like I'm in an episode of "Twin Peaks." You better believe she will be Hot Slut tomorrow.
Thanks Lauren
Bump Watch: Kidman '08
Nicole Kidman was out in Sydney with her trainer and revealed a very small bump. Exciting. Not really, but you know. She also kept her forehead hidden. Damn her! I want to see her botox-free forehead. It's probably so droopy that it's laying on top of her sunglasses. I don't know how her forehead is going to survive many more months without its favorite poison. She's totally going to get snap-on bangs to hide her shit.
Down The Rabbit Hole?
Lindsay Lohan told Harper's Bazaar that she's gunning for the role of Alice in Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland" movie. Sarah Michelle Gellar and Johnny Depp also want the role, so Lindsay has some competition. She said, "I just hope they don't want an unknown, I really want this part." Yeah, I'm really sure Tim is going to give the title role to a chick that hasn't had a hit since Herbie: Fully Loaded!
Tim talked about the movie and said, "The stories are like drugs for children, you know? It's like, 'Whoa, man.' I think it's an interesting challenge to direct." Drugs for children? Lohan knows a lot about that. She would only inject sin into this children's story. She would probably tell Tim that she wants to do the entire movie topless and thinks they should add a sex scene between Alice and the Cheshire Cat.
The above picture is from that "trying too hard" photo shoot Linds did for Bazaar. Click here to see the rest

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