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Phoebe Price is taking Cannes by storm or is it Cannes is taking PP by storm? I'll get back to you on that one. PP once again provided some much needed glamour to the red carpet by attending the "Vicky Cristina Barcelona" premiere. PP does not play Vicky, Cristina or Barcelona. Shit, she's not even an extra in the movie. That doesn't matter! I'm sure Woody Allen himself asked PP to bless his premiere with her chicken cutlets.

Don't ask me what the hell she's wearing. I'm sure it's from a designer whose name I can't even pronounce. Actually, it's probably from Sally Kirkland's garage sale. That doesn't matter! PP is stunning as usual. You know she thinks she looks like Lucy Westenra from "Dracula."

Those Cannes bitches better give PP some sort of prize at the end of this. I'm thinking "Hottest Babe at Cannes!"

The premiere was also attended by Star Jones and her arm vagina, Woody and his mute bride (does Soon-Yi even talk?) and Penny Cruz.

The Sun caught up with Boy George to see what he's been doing lately. Well, he's been selling $20 t-shirts, vests and other things at Spitalfields Market, East London. I guess that shit is like a swap meet. The items are all from his B-Rude label.

He told The Sun, “It’s been all right — quiet today though. I’m bored and cold but we have to do a Friday stall to get a pitch on Sunday.”

Damn, don't people save their money anymore?! Haven't they heard of a CD, savings account or a shoe box under the bed? Oh well, it's a fine living. If Boy ever gets bored of selling his wares at the market, he should come over here and star in a Vh1 reality show. Rock of Love needs a new bachelor. I would totally audition for that shit. Boy can chain me to a rusty radiator any day. I'll Tumble 4 Ya, George!

Cue music:

Thanks Natasha

Lily Allen seems to be having a blast in Cannes. She's boozing, flipping people off and airing her chocha out in the French breezes. I guess fake blondes do have more fun. Seriously, it's time for Lily to cover up that blonde mess. It was fun while it lasted, but she is totally starting to look like the crazy lady at my laundromat and that is fucking me up.

Here's more of Lily with her daddy at a Cannes party on Thursday night. The first thumbnail is slightly NSFW. Not really. You just see a little landing strip. A little landing strip never hurt anybody. A little stubble however is a different story. I don't know how many times my tongue has been burned by taint stubble. Wax don't shave!

Not an AA sponsor, a party sponsor! HoHan is throwing a 22nd Birthday BLOWout and she's looking for someone to front the bill. Yeah, she's turning 22. She's 22, but her skin is at least 45. Anyway, a website was set-up with all the dazzling details for for prospective sponsors. The website reads:

"Sponsors will have a unique branding opportunity to an internationally media worthy event. Lindsay and her 10 closes girlfriends will start the celebration in the early afternoon with spa treatments including manicures, facials and massages.

Upon nightfall an intimate group of 75 VIP guests will gather for dinner, performances and most importantly to help Lindsay blow out the candles on her 22nd Birthday cake."

Facials, blow and cake?! Count me the fuck in. I'll immediately empty out my piggy bank and apply to be one of her sponsors. I mean, an 8-ball and a bottle of Gordon's vodka don't cost that much.

TMZ claims the website is real and HoHan is not accepting sponsorships from booze companies. Beggars can't be choosers! Dykes on Bykes should really empty out their wallets and help a sister out. She neeeeeds them!

He wants you to look at him. He's begging you!

Marc Jacobs looks like he ransacked Kelly Osbourne's make-up bag for his spread in Interview Magazine. Actually, he looks more like Ronald McDonald's cross-dressing brother. Rory McDonald. You know, the one we're not supposed to talk about. I think the McRib was inspired by him. I could be wrong.

Visit BryanBoy to see more pics from Marc Jacob's Interview shoot.

*Images Removed Per Request*

It's sloooow today, so here's some very blurry Angelina Jolie nipple action. Yeah, try not to drool on your computer. The photos were taken while Angie Jo was changing her shirt on the terrace of her villa in France. That villa is fucking ridiculous. It's almost as nice as my Barbie dream house, ALMOST. Yes, I had a Barbie dream house growing up. Didn't every young homo?

Here's also some pictures of Brad with Shiloh.

In case you missed it, here's Mike "forever fat on the inside" Huckabee trying to be a comedian while speaking to the NRA yesterday. While Huckabee was giving his speech, there was a noise offstage. He quickly joked that Barack Obama fell off his chair. Everyone kind of laughed, so the dumb fuck decided he should continue the joke. He added, "Somebody aimed a gun at him and he dove for the floor." Nobody laughed.

That stupid fuck should really quit his job as America's Number 1 dickwad and take his comedy act on the road. The KKK Comedy tour!

Huckabee later apologized by saying, "During my speech at the NRA, a loud noise backstage that sounded like a chair falling distracted the crowd and interrupted my speech. I made an offhand remark that was in no way intended to offend or disparage Sen. Obama. I apologize that my comments were offensive. That was never my intention."

Basically, he's saying he's a dumb fuck and can't help it.

Somebody give Woody Allen a jar of Gerber's tropical dessert baby food. He looks like he needs one. I just discovered that shit and it's delicious. I'm tempted to mix it with a shot of vodka for an extra kick!

Woody is currently in Cannes promoting his 1,245,678th movie, Vicky Cristina Barcelona, with Penny Cruz. Penny is so fucking gorgeous. No wonder Salma Hayek ALLEGEDLY went lesbian for her. I'd even go lesbo for her. Salma is probably only shacking up with that rich dude, so that she can take all his money and run away with Penny. They want to buy the Isle of Lesbos and change its name to the Isle of Gayelle.

Harrison Ford just needs some Cialis, Ben-Gay, a warm compress and he's ready for a hot sexay night of passion. Well, the fun and games have to end around 10pm, because pepaws like to get up at the break of dawn.

Here's 66-year-old Harry with Calista Flockhart in Cannes.

Yesterday, I posted some pictures of Nikki Cox and her fish lips from hell. I think Amanda Lepore was her inspiration. Mandy's lips have enough crap in them to keep Tupperware in business for decades. Shit, we should recycle her hot ass. All our problems will be solved. Naw, let's not recycle her. The world needs this kind of glamour and beauty. While all of us get wrinkly and saggy, Mandy will still look like this.

Here's Mandy looking like a sexy, plastic Dixie cup at the Life Ball in Vienna.