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The fake book cover above didn't qualify for a "Photoshop Award" because I'm pretty sure this shit was made with MSPaint and not Photoshop. Judging by its cover, you know this movie is going straight to the clearance section at Blockbuster. It has "blue light special" written all over it. Anyway, the prop book featuring a knocked HoHan on the cover was made for her new soon-to-be Razzie nominated movie, "Labor Pains" aka "Someone Had To Give This Sad Bitch A Job."

This movie looks like it was paid for using food stamps and WIC vouchers. Cheap! Was HoHan's wardrobe provided by Fashion Bug?

And the look on her face in the fake book cover says it all, "What the hell kind of fuckery did I get myself into?"

On that note, my homo ass needs to get on a plane and pray that I don't get sick. I always seem to walk off from a flight with the flu and an ass cramp. Shut the hell up! I know what you're thinking. Anyway, I'll post more shit when I land.

Chris Martin obviously drank too much douche water before an interview with BBC's Radio 4. Chris refuses to discuss his personal life including Fishsticks and his kids, but it sounds like he doesn't like talking about anything!

The show's host asked Chris a simple question about the new album, "Did you start with the song Viva La Vida and the idea within that song of the disposed dictator looking back at his life?" Chris immediately bitched, "I'm not really enjoying this. Can I have two minutes? 'I just don't like talking about things." That's what a fucking interview is?! Did he think it was going to be a circle jerk at Disneyland?!

Chris then got out of his chair and walked out leaving the interview. He probably went to call Fishsticks and cry about how he's "misunderstood."

Chris finally returned to the interview, but didn't fully answer any questions. When the host asked another question about his music, Chris replied, "Um... yes... yes, yes ... exactly."

In Chris' defense, you'd probably act this grouchy if you had to look at Fishy's face every single morning! Those two delusional twats love themselves way too much. This bitch needs to pull the Van de Kamp butt plug out of his ass, smile like a pretty girl and answer every question without being an ass about it.

Source: OK! Magazine

The ink on Sarah Larson's final invoice is barely dry and George Clooney has already moved on! That's what Page Six claims anyway. A source told them that Georgie started dating some other chick months before he dumped Sarah's mannequin ass.

The source went on to say that George knew he was going to cancel Sarah's contract, but kept the relationship going, so that she could get a little more shine in the spotlight. He thought it would help her "career." Yeah, her career as America's #1 ho.

Clooney's new piece has been described as blonde and in her mid-30s. Hmmm...blonde....,,in her mid-30s? Wait! He's totally dating the woman of his dreams, Brad Pitt! I know Brad is 40-something, but in dark lighting he could pass for 30s. Angie Jolie better tell Maddox to get his guns out. It's war.

Seriously, Georgie's spokesbitch responded by saying, "How does one as public as George secretly date anyone?" He's been secretly smashing dudes for a long ass time and has pretty much gotten away with it. It ain't hard to keep secrets. That's what S&M dungeons are for!

M. Night Shamalamamama's latest piece of cinematic caca is getting the kind of reviews that would even make flop-queen Nicole Kidman weep. I actually wanted to see "The Happening," but then I accidentally read what the "natural disaster" in the movie is. I'm sorry, but I've coughed up loogies that sound more terrifying than this shit. Count me the fuck out.

M. Night claims he did this mess on purpose. He sought out to make a B-Movie. He told Reuters, "I wanted it to be a fantastic, fun B-movie. The No. 1 thing is I want people to say: 'That was a really fun B-movie."

B-movie? Does B stand for bullshit? On second thought, maybe I'll sit through this crap and bring my best friend, Grey Goose, along for the ride. When I went to see "The Village," I got drunk like a Tara Reid during the movie and I've never laughed so much in my life. Everyone in the theater wanted to do murder times to me, but who gives a fuck?

The Trannycat Dolls have a new video for their "song," "When I Grow Up." It's not much of a song, it's more like an annoying noise that keeps buzzing in your ear. Brit Brit reportedly shot a cameo for this mess, but was cut at the last minute. They did the Cheeto one a favor.

When I first heard this mess of a song, I thought they sang "I wanna have boobies." And I immediately thought, "Um...you do have boobies. Bought and paid for. Now it's time to work on getting yourself that vagina." They actually sing, "I wanna have groupies." Boring! I like boobies better.

Shawn Harrison - He played Waldo Geraldo Faldo on "Family Matters." I couldn't find a better picture of his ass, but Waldo was always my favorite dumb bitch on that show!

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