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Dreamy's Lullaby To Kate
Dreamboat Doherty posted this lovely video on his YouTube account and dedicated to the snagtoof of his life, Kate Moss. He sings some song called "Bohemian Love" while pictures of him and Kate flash on the screen. I swear, crackies love webcams and cameras. If you don't know what to get your favorite crackhead for Christmas, get them a webcam. They will love you for it.
One of Dreamy's scared pussies also makes an appearance at the 1:45 mark. Pussy looks so relaxed. It probably just had a hit from Dreamy's pipe.
And here's some pictures of Dreamboat at Glastonbury. Who the hell didn't play Glastonbury?! Please tell me Samantha Fox is closing that bitch.
Wenn
Would You Hit It?
Two words: FUCK YES! And if you say you wouldn't hit it, you are lie-telling. Majorly lie-telling.
Here's Pharrell Williams performing with the rest of N.E.R.D at the Roter Salon in Berlin on Friday night.
Wenn
Hot Slut Of The Week: Michael Ian Black
Birthday: August 12, 1971
Age: 36
Birth Name: Michael Schwartz
Original Date of HS of the Day: June 28, 2008
Claim to Fame: Bitch made a name for himself with "The State" which later became a show on MTV. He was also in "Wet Hot American Summer" and "Celebrity Poker Showdown."
Where is he now? His book "My Custom Van: And 50 Other Essays That Will Blow Your Mind All Over Your Face"is coming out soon. Yes, that title is too short. He also did an interview with Gawker about the book and other shit.
Why is he HS of the Week? Because I learned that he's the voice of the sock puppet from the Pets.com commercials.
Bonus! Below is a video of MIB reading the letters he wrote to the first girl he ever finger banged:
Because You Care
File this under: Yes, they are still alive! Paris Bennett, Carmen Rasmusen and Ruben Studdard from "American Idol" might not be busy making music, but they are busy doing something. In case you give a duck's penis, here's some news on these has-beens.
Paris Bennett (Season 5): The jesus-loving 19-year-old is knocked up with her first baby! Paris will pop out a girl this October and plans to name her Egypt. Egypt?! That baby is already doomed. I knew a ho named Egypt and her mommy really should have named her Cleopbitcha instead, because she was a mega cunt. Hopefully, Princess P re-thinks that name. She should name her Toulouse instead. Paris & Toulouse!
Paris' mommy confirmed the news, "This makes five generations. I'm proud of how she did it. I was 16 when I got pregnant." Her mommy said that Paris is engaged to the baby daddy, but she wouldn't say his name. It's probably Clay Gayken's. (AOL BV)
Carmen Rasumsen (Season 2): While performing in Branson, Missouri, Carmen announced to the audience that she was knocked up. Carmen said she and her husband are expecting a baby around Christmas Eve. She added, “Now we’re able to open up and talk about (God)." HUH?! Seriously, who is this bitch? I don't even remember her! And she's lying. It's really Clay Gayken's baby. (Reserve Branson)
Ruben Studdard (Season 2 winner): The Velvet Teddy Bear married Surata Zuri McCants yesterday in Birmingham, AL. Ruben was joined by 20 groomsmen. He's probably pregnant too......with Clay Gayken's baby, of course. (People)
The Face John Mayer Made When He First Saw Jenny Aniston's Chocha
It could also be the face he makes while he's cleaning out his foreskin. You know that shit is like a three-cheese pizza with extra crust. If Johnny Mayer makes those faces while he's playing, imagine the faces he makes during fuckey fuckey times? A bitch making seizure frowns while banging into you is not sexy.
John Mayer performed at Glastonbury today, but Jenny Aniston did not watch him from the wings like a crazed stalker. She was at Heathrow this morning, on her way back to the US. OMG! They totally broke up! No...Jenny has things to get back to and by "things" I mean her Angelina voodoo shrine needs dusting.
Jenny did join John yesterday at the Hard Rock Calling festival in London. The night before, she watched John perform at London's Brixton Academy. If she can stand through two of his boring-as-fuck performances, then it must be love.
Here's Johnny at Glastonbury and Jenny arriving at Heathrow today.
That's It?!
During Amy Wino's tour de trainwreck performance at Glastonbury yesterday, she called Kanye West a "cunt" during one of her songs. I refreshed his blog all night, hoping he would deliver another CAPS-filled rant. He did not do this. He posted this shit instead. Hey, at least it's in all CAPS. He didn't disappoint me there. Hopefully, Kanye was so fucking mad that he threw his MacBook Air out of the window while posting. Wait, do MacBook Airs fly? If they don't, Apple needs to get on that.
Below is the video of Wino singing "I'm not openiiiing for a cunt like Kaaaaaanyeeeeeee-aaa-eeeee." It's at the 2-minute mark. Bitches need to watch and learn. This is how you do it! This is how you entertain.
And here's some pics of The Wino returning to her tomb at The Clinic after her performance.
Images: Wenn
Thanks Megan
A Royal Douche In Miami
Why the hell did KFed raid Queen Latifah's closet. This dumb bitch looks like a bull dyke going to the beach. He's covering up his moobs and his "gut over bagina." And to think, there was a time when I'd let KFed piss in my ear. Not anymore! Okay, maybe after a few bong hits.
So... KFed traveled to Miami this weekend following his custody bitch battle with Brit Brit. Don't worry, London is taking care of SPF and JJ.
KFed partied at Mansion in South Beach where he danced the night away until 4am. One witness told People, "Kevin is a great dancer with some very complicated moves." Complicated moves?! I'd hardly call the "cabbage patch" and "the running man" complicated dance moves.
Even though he was partying like a first-class douche, KFed had music on his mind. Yes, music.
A source told People that KFed is working on new material, "Kevin was in a great mood and even talked about a new song he is working on, called 'Daddy's Home.' He has put a lot of time and effort into writing and rehearsing it, but says it is not quite ready yet."
Daddy's Homo is more like it. KFed should really quit while he's ahead. He's never going to top the hip-hop masterpiece known as "Popozao."
The Rat's Name Is Annie
Who done told on Raffey Follieri to the FBI?! According to his friends, Raffey's ex-somethingoranother Anne Hathaway ratted him out to the feds. Why that cunning lil' gayelle!
One of his friends told the NYDN, "She's referred to as his former girlfriend in the indictment even though her spokesman never confirmed they broke up. I think that in return for her cooperation, the feds held off on arresting Follieri until she was out of the country."
29-year-old (MY ASS) Raffey is still sitting in jail on $21 million bial after he was arrested for fucking with the Vatican by pretending to be their CFO to steal tons of cash from investors.
Well played, Annie. Although, bitch should have taken his credit cards for a little Home Depot shopping spree before she turned his Zach Braff wannabe ass over to the FBI.
Hot Slut Of The Day!
Artist, the winner of Groomer Has It - Why did I watch this dog caca of a show?! In case you didn't know, Groomer Has It was a reality show about dog grooming. About dog fucking grooming! WTF is next? A show about America's next great colonic technician?
Birthday Sluts
Nicole Scherzinger (30)
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Jeff Burton (41)
Amanda Donohoe (46)
Sharon Lawrence (47)
Maria Conchita Alonso (51)
Richard Lewis (61)
Gary Busey (64)
Robert Evans (78)


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