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That's Not Something You Want To Take Credit For
Justin Timberfake wants everyone to know that he's the tool responsible for bringing the nauseating trucker cap trend to the masses. He told Fashion Rocks (via Marc Malkin), “It’s funny. I keep hearing Ashton Kutcher say how he was responsible for trucker caps. I’ve heard him make that statement before. Trace and I were wearing them when we were seventeen."
Hos have been wearing fugly ass trucker caps since the beginning of time. Jesus even wore one. Seriously, the fact that Justin wants credit for that ugly shit confirms his status as one of the biggest twats in history.
I'd rather wear a (DO NOT CLICK) diseased penis (DON'T) on my head than a nasty trucker cap.
The Fight Goes On!
International supermodel and anti-Chanel activist Phoebe Price held a demonstration outside of the Chanel store on Robertson Blvd the other day. Okay, this wasn't so much as a demonstration as it was PP posing for the paps. And looking naturally beautiful while doing so.
PP was probably there to show those dumb whores at Chanel what they are missing out on - chicken cutlet glamour! Okay, the truth is they didn't let her into the store. I'm joking! If PP took shits, she wouldn't even wipe herself with their tacky crap!
Don't ask me what's going on with her mega lawsuit against Chanel. I think the Supreme Court is handling it or something.
In the first thumbnail below, does PP realize that the pap is trying to get a clear shot of her copper wire bush? She is so transfixed with the camera lens that she has no idea what's going on. A true pro.
UPDATE: Here's a video from FinalPixx of PP outside of the store. She tells the paps that she must have left an impact, because Chanel has shut down. Actually, they were doing a little work in the front of the store, so people had to enter from the back. The store is still open. Don't tell PP that!
P.S. - Below in thumbnail #6, that's not a missing tooth! That's a black diamond!
Wenn
Is Big Brother's Jessie A Major Homo?
Jessie Godderz from Big Brother 10 is the bodybuilder and resident twat of the house. I seriously can't stand him for the simple fact that he's fucking with Renny. Nobody messes with my Renny.
A week or so ago, a few semi-nude pictures of Jessie leaked. GaySocialite's claims that Jessie's friends leaked the pictures. They also claim that Jessie is a closeted wiener gobbler. One of their friends said, "He isn't ready for his parents, or the public, to know that he is gay. Jessie isn't actually open with his sexuality, but he doesn't hide it too well either. We just don't talk about it."
Um....the fourth thumbnail below is as gay as it gets. I'm sure Tommy Girl has already photoshopped his face into that picture. Gross.
Towleroad also made a good point. Jessie may not like chicks or other dudes, but he definitely loves himself. Seriously, he wants to make a million roid babies with himself. He's probably broken several mirrors from trying to do sex to his own reflection.
That being said, I'd hit it, but I'd have to bring my own dildo. You know he totally has roly poly peen.
EARTHQUAKE (And LaDouche News)
I hope everyone in L.A. is okay and didn't drop any booze during or after the earthquake. Unfortunately, Wonky McValtrex or any of those other twats were not injured. We'll get 'em next time!
Anydrunky, it is Shia LaDouche's lucky day. Although, I'm not sure I should use the word "lucky." It was determined that he wasn't at fault for the car accident on Sunday morning. The Sheriff's office said that the other driver ran a red light and will be cited.
Shia was arrested on misdemeanor DUI charges, but he hasn't been arraigned yet.
I'm sure Shia is going to celebrate the only way a douche knows how........with whiskey shots!
This Is What Heaven Must Look Like.....
....Well, except for that bag of donut grease ogling at the Empress of Lucite. His hairy eyeballs are not worthy of staring at such pristine elegance. He should be on his doughy knees, kissing her lucite footprints. Even the trees and that trash can are staring at Shauna Sand's magnificent beauty. You can't help but not!
Shauna spent an exhausting afternoon at the pool in Miami on Sunday. Seriously, it must be so tiring being that gorgeous. It's good thing I wasn't there. Not only would I have stolen her exquisite lucite heels while she was in the pool, but I also would have downed gallons of that pool water after she got out. That shit is like blessed holy water from the heavens.
They're Asking The Wrong Politician
Former Vice President Dan Quayle is reportedly in the running to join the cast of "Dancing with the Has-Beens Stars."
Extra reports that Dan is on the short bus list along with Kim KardASSIAN, Lance Bass, Florence Henderson and Warren Sapp. Al Sharpton has already said he rejected an offer to do the tango.
ABC is seriously asking the wrong politician. Dan Quayle is about as exciting as this post. ABC should really ask Larry Craig. The bitch already knows how to tap dance and I'm sure he has the time.
ABC will announce the entire cast in the next couple of weeks. Seriously, Larry Craig better be on that list.
Jerry's Got A Gun
82-year-old Jerry Lewis was making his way through security at Las Vegas' McCarran International Airport when they discovered an unloaded gun in his carry-on. They probably wanted to ask Jerry, "Is that a gun or you just happy to see me," but I'm pretty sure Jerry's "gun" hasn't been cocked in a while.
According to Entertainment Tonight, Jerry said he didn't realize he had a gun in there. He told security that family members had used his bag. When all else fails, blame your family.
Jerry was only cited for carrying a concealed weapon without a permit.
Boo! Airport security really missed an opportunity to give the world an amazing mug shot. They should have called the police and had his pepaw ass arrested. That mug shot would have been tore up! The stuff mug shot dreams are made of!
Afternoon Crumbs
Start the divorce countdown! Marc Jacobs might have gotten married this past weekend - Towleroad
It looks like Jenna Jameson's vagina finally exploded - Hollywood Tuna
Balthazar Getty is keeping his hole shut - Popsugar
Maggie Gyllenhag in a hot dress - Lainey Gossip
Vadge's plastic surgery makeover is almost complete - Cityrag
Miley Cyrus is a lady - IDLYITW
Kiki Dunst walking around in her nightgown - Just Jared
WTF of the day: Pamela Anderson could have been Agent Scully - Hollywood Rag
Paulina Rubio in a bikini with a furry friend (I'm not talking about her snatch) - Egotastic!
Elisabetta Gregoraci is one smart bitch (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather
CAPTION THIS NSFW
Would You Hit It?
Scream "YES!!!!" from your cubicle or wherever you are, because you know you would hit that shit in a flash. You would sweat on that oldie!
Everyone knows that if you let Richard Simmons stick the tip in, you'll live forever. Not only will you live forever, but you'll shit rainbows too.
Here's happiest homo in all the land outside of "The Late Show" last night.
Wireimage, Wenn


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