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On the season premiere of The MeMeMeMeMe Show today, Ty Ty Banks left her wig in her dressing room and came out with her real hair in all its natural glory!! Well, not completely natural. Ty Ty wet it down using the tears of fallen Top Model contestants and slicked it back before she came out.

You know, on the show Ty Ty kept saying that everyone have always thought she was balding like Jon Gosselin underneath her wig. I always figured that underneath Ty Ty's wig was a massive hard-drive which comes up with all her "brilliant" ideas. So I was kind of shocked (not really).

And if Ty Ty really wants to unveil a mystery, she should get Kim Zolciak to rip off her 10-part wig. Actually, I don't know if we're ready for that. All of the world's scariest nightmares are probably hiding under there.

Christina Milian (the girl from the classic piece of cinema that is Love Don't Cost A Thing) and The Dream (yeah, I don't know either), eloped in a wedding fit for a Spears! No, really it was a wedding fit for Spears, because they got hitched at the same joint in Las Vegas Brit Brit married her first husband at.

TMZ says that they got married at The Little White Wedding Chapel at midnight on Friday. Christina really gave herself the princess bride treatment by renting a wedding dress, shoes and a veil for $200. The Dream also splurged by borrowing his tuxedo and shoes for $100. I'm sure the reception was held at the Sizzler. Expect to see this extravagant affair on My Big Fat Fabulous Wedding.

And if this isn't a shotgun wedding, I don't know what is. I just really hope they don't name their baby The Dream Jr. Or The Dreamier.

Kim Cattrall, Mrs. Rojo Caliente, SJP and Kristin Davis reunited for today on the NYC set of Sex in the City 2: Why Isn't Rojo In This Shit Already?!.

As much as I love seeing these bitches slowly killing their feet by wearing heels even Satan would hiss at, Rojo Caliente Time is long overdue! Sigh. I'll just keep hoping that Rojo makes a cameo in the movie as an all grown-up Brady in a dream sequence.

And I'm also hoping that in the sequel, Kim Cattrall finds out that she is actually a mannequin who used to be an ancient Egyptian. The SATC sequel obviously needs some Meshach Taylor.

UPDATE: YES, the drought is over! Rojo Caliente was spotted on the set of SATC today. Maybe my dream of her as Brody is about to come true! Now, I can quick trolling the Home Depot in Chelsea to get a glimpse of the reclusive ginge rainbow. I got my fix...for now. (Thanks Shayna for the tip!)

At a press conference at the Venice Film Festival for the movie The Men Who Stare At Goats, some some topless loon begged George Clooney for a kiss. No, it was not Sarah Larson. It was a dude who announced he loved the peenus, stripped his clothes off and then asked George to put his precious lips on his (at the 1:25 mark above). Surprisingly, George turned his ass down, but said it was a good try. And I bet you George has done the exact same thing to Brad Pitt when they've had too many cups of the sweet nectar and too many puffs of the good shit.

Here's George with Elisabetta Canalis at the premiere of that goat movie tonight. And if you're wondering why Elisabetta is signing autographs, it's because she's famous in Italy. Or as my Italian friend said, "Bitch is famous for fucking EVERYONE." My kind of trick!

Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Karina Smirnoff from Dancing with the Has-Beens are no longer doing the wet nekkid mambo on each other, because they have canceled their engagement. Karina's spokeswhore confirms to E! that they have broken up.

Karina and Maksim got engaged early last year, but postponed their wedding until next year due to their "hectic schedules."

I'm sure it's just a coincidence that Karina and Maksim have pink-slipped each other right before the new season of Dancing for a Paycheck starts.... Yeah, I doubt they broke up for publicity. They would NEVER do that!

Karina and Maksim didn't give a reason for their split, but let's just blame it on my arch rival CHERYL BURKE. Mop Head should be blamed for absolutely everything! If go home tonight and find that you're out of booze, BLAME MOP HEAD. If you're getting it from the back and the peen misses the hole, poking you in the crack, BLAME MOP HEAD. Blame it all on Mop Head!

Senator Al Franken draws a map of the US from memory! Pfft. But can he correctly name all ten million of the Duggar children?! That takes real skill. - Best Week Ever

Nicole Kidman can actually produce real tears! - Towleroad

Oscar-winning nipples - Egotastic!

Rebecca Gayfart is totally knocked up - Popsugar

And after the match, Roger Federer and Keith Urban played a game of racquetball off of Nicole Kidman's botoxed-to-death forehead - Just Jared

Ryan Gosling and his car....just because - Lainey Gossip

I don't know who any of these drunk ass skanks are, but they are doing everything RIGHT- Holy Moly!

Clothes: Milla Jovovich isn't wearing any - Hollywood Rag

Clothes: Ashley Greene is wearing some - Hollywood Tuna

Remember this face! You know you'll be seeing her ass in Transformers 3 (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

The Passion of the Drunk - Cityrag

Inside the Asshole Palace - Celebitchy

Yeah, Heidi Klum becomes a real fat fat fatty ass when she gets pregnant (sarcasm) - I'm Not Obsessed

Kiki looks a mess - ICYDK

Susan Sarandon or Tootsie? - SOW

I'm guessing Chris Brown won't be doing his version of "Beat It"? - Socialite Life

Is this what the Olsens look like without make-up? - Popbytes

Matt Damon just loved going on The Kirstie Alley Diet before filming The Informant - Popeater

Birthday: Sometime in 1943
Age: 66
Birth Name: ?

Original Date of HS of the Day: September 4, 2009
Claim to Fame: MiHat is about to become the First Lady of Japan. And she's also a life stylist, dancer, actress, cookbook author, image coordinator, frequent visitor to Venus and past-life friend of Tommy Girl.

Where is she now? Probably chilling with her homies on Venus and getting read to bring the crazy in a bigger way to Japan when she becomes First Lady later this month.

Why is she HS of the Week? Um. The woman's soul has traveled to Venus on UFO while her body slept. Isn't that reason enough?! Actually, she probably just sleep walked into the Scientology headquarters in Tokyo. Possible.

This is for all you kinky foot fuckers out there! And for those of you who get the crotch seizures whenever you see bare feet, you can curse my name later.

You know, Hugh Jackmeoff's nekkid feet aren't as disturbing as his wife's horrific platform flip-flop/chankla things. Thank the fuck my abuelita didn't know about those things when I was a kid or I'd been in the Guinness Book of World Records for suffering the most concussions.

Here's Hugh catching every disease known to Parasite Hilton's snatch while walking barefoot in NYC the other day.

Peter Andre and Katie Price's marriage was put under the guillotine and quickly beheaded this morning at London's High Court. The Mirror says that Peter or Katie were not present when a judge declared their officially marriage over. Peter and Katie listed "unreasonable behavior" as the reason for their divorce. Any whore who has seen more than two seconds of their reality show would co-sign that wholeheartedly!

I will admit that this brings the sads just a little bit. I mean, look at the picture above. There was a time when these two were the most elegant and delicate crystal flowers in England (sorry, Jodie Marsh). They were so classy that they made everyone want to masturbate with a pinky But then Katie decided she wanted to clean herself up and stop being such a skank.

That's when I immediately jumped off, because I cannot condone a born and bred slut turning her back on her roots. After that, Katie & Peter just weren't the same for me. But at least we'll always have this stunning portrait of refinement. So, we should thank them for that!