For those of you kinky bitches out there with sick foot fetishes who regularly have wet dreams about licking the hard boils between Mickey Rourke's rubbery toes, these pictures goes out to you!
Chris Evans is playing Captain America, and he put on a pair of Buffalo Bill-approved feet boots to shoot several action scenes in Manchester, England today. Now you know what Madge's podiatrist sees before he removes her skin to rotate the bones in her feet.
Here's more of Chris walking around in his creepy ass prosthetic boots. Just focus on his watermelon arms (which could beat Vinny's dick in a wrestling match) and everything will be okay.
Those hipster glasses are not helping your cause, Demi - The Superficial
Stephen Colbert should do this more often - Towleroad
Being George Clooney's piece of the moment is hard work, so here's Elisabetta Canalis taking a well-earned break - Hollywood Tuna
Lara Stone's "Eyes Wide Shut" shit on the cover of French Vogue (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather
Panty Creamer of the Day: Daniel Henney - The Berry
Beth Ditto is sick of hos diagnosing her as unhealthy - Celebitchy
You win, Josh Brolin, Megan Fox really is our modern day Katherine Hepburn and here's the proof - Popoholic
What is power bottom Grimace supposed to do now? - OMG Blog
Liv Tyler in the bath - Egotastic
Who is that trick with Cristian de la Fuente? Doesn't she know his heart will always belong to Dixie Carter. - Moe Jackson
Stoner than stoned: Matthew McConaughey and his bearded friend - Popsugar
RiRi needs to give that wig back to the Raggedy Ann doll she snatched it from - Just Jared
Proof that your skin starts bruising up as soon as Kate Moss touches you - Cityrag
STFU Michael Lohan - I'm Not Obsessed
Another high-priced pussy peddler is claiming Becks as one of her clients - Hollywood Rag
Kat Von Double Chin - ICYDK
(Image via INFDaily.com)
Here's professional mug shot taker Lindsay Lohan's latest. White Oprah will soon have enough for a calendar, or lamented placements!
John Travolta's Scientolohole eats a dick for breakfast, a dick for lunch, a dick for an afternoon snack, a dick for dinner and brushes with a dick before gargling a dick. This is what author Robert Randolph claims. Robert is the one who gave The National Enquirer a few pieces from his book, which claims that John Travolta is the reigning peen gobbling king of the underground gay sauna world in L.A.
Robert is talking to The Enquirer (via Celebitchy) again, and this time he's diagnosing John Travolta with a chronic addiction to dick. Adicktion if you will.
Robert says that ever since The Enquirer ran the story about John's love for gay steam room sex, he's gotten six e-mails from dudes who have admitted to eating Vincent Vega's royale with cheese. Robert expects to get at least 50 more e-mails. Yeah, he's a regular Miss Cleo too. Robert told The Enquirer, “I have no doubt that John Travolta is a sex addict. I’ve heard from many men who have either had gay sex with John or saw him having gay sex in health spas, steam rooms, locker rooms, you name it. I’ve gotten so many emails that I’m writing a second book titles ‘Tracking Travolta’ and I’ve got plenty of material.”
Let's say Robert and these six dudes are telling the truth. Let's also say that Robert's estimate is a low ball figure and John's real number is around 150. If John started rolling on sauna wang when he got married to Kelly Preston, that means he's been at it for 19 years. That averages to around 8 different dicks a year. If 8 dicks a year makes a sex addict, then I'll see most of you at the SAA meeting down in the church basement next week. You bring the dicks, I mean donuts, I mean dicks.
I know you don't recognize the most regal lady in all of England without a citation from the health department taped on her torso or one of her stick-on nipples catching air, but this really is Jodie Marsh outside of a TV studio in London this morning.
Jodie wanted everyone to see the road angel of death tattoo that is perched above her chocha to warn visitors to turn back before it's too late, but I'm more interested in what's going on with the exquisite canvas above her neck.
Jodie's nose is starting to resemble a pencil dick with a wart-ridden mushroom head, and if she tried to blink her face would slowly peel off. The wind-up plastic frog that I used to play with during bath times (Okay, I still do) looked more natural than Jodie's face. What I'm getting at is that Jodie looks more gorgeous than a freshly waxed nutsack.
England should put a safety glass panel in front of Jodie, because she truly is their greatest treasure!
The second best part of TMZ's live feed of Lindsay Lohan's 45,678,978th day in court is when some asshole in the audience screamed at her while she was sashaying in, "Lindsay, you look beautiful! You don't look high at all!" But the best part was when White Oprah came running out, dropped to her knees and shook her snortin' finger at the gods for the injustice that just went down in that court room! Okay, that didn't happen, but I have hope that it will. The day is early.
Judge Elden Fox is the new Judge Not The One, because he ordered LiLo back to jail without bail for testing positive for coke and Adderall in two drug tests. Judge Fox didn't need to hear shit before he made his decision. LiLo came in, Judge Fox made his ruling and watched as the smugness totally drained from her face. She was immediately handcuffed and taken into custody.
So in the game of "Out of Jail, In Jail", The Little Cokehead That Can't is back in jail. Yeah, we're going to be doing this for a while. And bitch might not be released until October 22nd.
This is the new TGIF!
Nancy Wilson of Heart and director Cameron Crowe are no longer acting out the lyrics to "All I Wanna Do Is Make Love To You" every Friday night (you know they did), because they are legally quitting each other after 20 years of marriage! If Nancy and Cameron can't wake up next to each other every morning and think to themselves "I want to look at your face the rest of day", nobody can!
CBS News reports that on the divorce papers Nancy cited "Elizabethtown" as the reason for divorce. No, Nancy used the overused "irreconcilable differences." Nancy stated on the documents that they separated in 2008. She wants joint custody of their twin 10-year-old sons.
Nancy is using the "irreconcilable differences" reason, but my guess is she filed for divorce after she found out that her husband of 20 years and Stephen Fry are the same person. We knew all along, Nancy, but your ass just didn't want to listen.
Someone at UsWeekly must be smoking that shake and bake meth while writing about The Chosen Ones with Natalie's "Dearest Mommie" episode of Facts of Life playing in the background, because this is the epitome (or "ep-eh-toem" if your name is Shia LaBeouf) of RANDOM. UsWeekly says that contrary to what the Bible says, Mary Mother is not Vivienne and Knox's godmother. MINDY COHN IS!
When I really think about it (Why am I thinking about this?), this makes sense. St. Angie didn't ask Blair Warner, because: a) She's not one of Blair's "cyber prayer warriors" and b) She knows she can never compete with Blair's natural beauty and pedigree. Brad didn't ask Jo, because he knows very well that she could munch the holy spirit out of St. Angie and he doesn't want the competition. Tootie and Mrs. Garrett are serious members of Team Aniston, so they would never work. So the obvious choice was Natalie Green! And a source tells Us, "Mindy is good friends with them."
And I wonder if Brangelina kept the same theme for their other kids. Please tell me Maddox's godfather is Monroe Ficus from Too Close For Comfort.
Those cobblestones have been through some serious shit, but I bet they were not prepared for the kind of heat they felt when Lenny Kravitz stepped out wearing an ensemble you thought only existed in Grace Jones or Bill Kaulitz' closet. Nope, Lenny has joined the game.
The sight of anyone in leather wedge boots and leather pants would make me reach for a vial of Tim Gunn's blessed saliva, but Lenny Kravitz can wear whatever the hell he wants.
When Lenny struts his ass in leather wedge boots, everybody's sphincter pays the price. Yup, so you better move your proctologist appointment up a few hours today. You won't stop puckering until then.
And yes, I'd hit it until the doctor pronounced me D.O.A. And Lenny can keep the boots on! Please do.
One of the rings in Elizabeth Taylor's Museum of Wedding Joo-Ree (housed in her basement) lost its sparkle last night after Eddie Fisher died in Berkley, CA on Wednesday. Eddie's daughter Tricia Leigh Fisher told the Associated Press (via LAT) that he died of complications from hip surgery. Eddie was 82.
Eddie was a singer, entertainer, sometimes actor and legendary lover of the ladies. Eddie pretty much dated everyone in the olden days including Marlene Dietrich, Dinah Shore, Judy Garland, Angie Dickinson and Kim Novak. Eddie was a five-time husband who can count Debbie Reynolds, Liz, Connie Stevens, Terry Richard and Betty Lin as his past wives.
Eddie is survived by his four children, Carrie Fisher, Joely Fisher, Todd Fisher and Tricia Leigh Fisher.
Rest in peace, Eddie. You're now up in heaven where it's always COKE TIME (Not that kind of coke time, Paris, so stop trying to book a ticket on Travelocity)!!!