It's "Dump On Gay Al" Month!
Gay Al has taken to his MySpace to blog about his divorce to Star Jones. Gay Al has asked all of us to walk in his shoes "for a few hours." I would, but stilettos aren't my flavor. Gay Al has the calves for those things. I don't.
The post is long, so fly on over to Gay Al's fairy kingdom if you want to read the whole thing. Here's parts of it:
Dear Friends: If you think you are having a tough day, may I propose you walk in my shoes for a few hours. In my mind, it feels like “Dump on Al Month.” And I’m not having fun yet. I have been called a gigolo, a freeloader, unemployed, a sham and many other things that don’t bear repeating. People on television, radio and the internet have spoken disparagingly of my life, my sexuality, my career and my integrity. The media has barraged me (at my home), my friends, my family(including my 79 year old mother), my college classmates, my students and my professional colleagues. Yet, despite this intense level of provocation, I have said nothing. My Publicist has put out a one sentence statement: “We’re taking the high road.” And we have and will continue on that path. As much as I want to defend myself, it seems like a silly and futile exercise. It’s clear that the media doesn’t want to let the truth get in the way of a good story. I hate to ruin their fun. I take great comfort in the fact that my loved ones and those people who really know me continue to love and respect me. Thank you “all” for the endless emails, phone calls and words of encouragement. I know in my heart that I entered my marriage with love and the best of intentions and leave it with great sadness that it didn’t work.
What I want people to know is that I am not the caricature portrayed by the media. I am complex, contradictory and capable of great intelligence but also remarkable stupidity. In other words, I am a human being. To me, labels are for clothes, not people. So…..Please don’t try to define me; don’t try to categorize me; and most of all, don’t label me. Instead, JUST GET TO KNOW ME. And if you see me, just call me Al.
I'm pretty sure it's "Dump on Al Day" once a month at The Loading Zone in Miami.
Aww...poor Gay Al! He has a friend in me. If homegirl ever called me crying, because his 12-man tag team party ran out of lube, I'd immediately drop my pancake sandwich and head on over with a fresh cup of WET for him to borrow. That's what friends are for.
VIA People
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WTF does he have to bitch about??? Seriously, what a whiny bitch. Oh yeah, life is so hard when you have no talent.
He is my favorite. Just saw his profile on millionaire datinglsite "W e a l t h y R o m a n c e. co m" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship he is looking for on that site/.
Hey, Al. You married Star Jones. STAR. JONES.AL. MARRIED. That might be what all the fuss is about.
I don't even know what to say (?) What is his career exactly? Anyone who proposes and actually marries Star Jones deserves a "dump on him year" for a lifetime. Fat, thin, that woman is rotten from the core out. Nasty.
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Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strenght.
Save an animal in a shelter: Http://dogsindanger.com
sounds like the divorce will be ugly...and besides, isn't every day "dump on al" day?
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that's twice you called me stupid...well that's twice you answered...
"I am complex, contradictory and capable of great intelligence but also remarkable stupidity."
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It's the remarkable stupidity that keeps us entertained...give us some of that.......Al.
"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......
To him, "labels are for clothes...." That's why all his undies were marked: Property of Star Jones.
~~The world's largest sink hole~~
Submitted by jussayin on May 13, 2008 - 7:03pm.
so did he start whistling after that last sentence?
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HAHAHA! :)
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"Darling, I love you, but give me Park Avenue."
he prob is gay but we dont know for sure, and who cares?
The activist blog with action alerts for the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Asexual, and Intersexual community!
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Props for proofreading. That's the most grammatically correct MySpace post I've seen in . . . well, ever.
Serious question: Why do gay dudes go for the fat beard? I mean, it's sooooo played out....Just go young and dumb and you don't have to write quite the costly check you do with a fat chick ,cuz you know that pie hole ain't gonna stay shut without a lot of Hagan Daz, filet mignon, Krispy Kreme and Velveeta. Fat chicks love their Velveeta. They won't admit it, but they do....and you know they melt some Velveeta over a Krispy Kreme and top it with four slices of bacon...You know they do...Ok, that's what I do...*hanging tiger head in shame*, but it's surprisingly delicious...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
HAHAHAHAHA
He has only ten friends - and one of them is *MySpace Tom*
Why would you blog to 10, er 9 friends?
Perhaps he should pimp out his page to generate interest.
Whiney self centered bitch is what he is.
I'm bored with you now.
so did he start whistling after that last sentence?
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Arthur "No offense intended"
Tick "None comprehended."
"If you think you are having a tough day, may I propose you walk in my shoes for a few hours." Oh STFU, Big Gay Al. If you think YOU are having a bad day, why don't you walk in the shoes of the people affected the earthquake in China. What a douche.
blah blah blah
Oh Al, I still think you're a big gay sissy.
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Never fall in love with an Englishman. They will charm you, steal your heart then stomp all over you. Worst of all they are immune to your pain suffering and tears. ~ Based on a true story
Al needs to change his status on MySpace to FREE AT LAST! from Married.
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"YOU CRACKHEAD BITCH! 25 cents is a quarter! But you need more than that to fix your overcast teefs!" - MK
I feel bad for him. Living with that hag had to be hard.
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"YOU CRACKHEAD BITCH! 25 cents is a quarter! But you need more than that to fix your overcast teefs!" - MK
What CAREER is he referring to?
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"Darling, I love you, but give me Park Avenue."
Calm down Al. Take it easy.
blazingwhitetrash on May 13, 2008 - 6:26pm.
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Love your Jane Russell avie.
Carry on. :)
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But then again, what do I know?
And what about the people of Cambodia and China whose lives are in ruins thanks to natural disasters in the last week? No, Gay Al wants us to think about him and his petty fucking problems. Well, Gay Al, FUCK YOU!
I'm taking a Writing crash course this summer. I know I can't speak or type right. I'm the product of the Southern New Jersey school system. Please forgive a bitch for her lousy English.
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Cocaine habit-forming? Of course not. I ought to know. I've been using it for years.
-Tallulah Bankhead
now that he's divorced miss star jones he can use whatever money he's gotten from her and get some braces. thats what i'd do. oh wait i take that back. if it where me i would go on that trim spa diet everyone is talking about.its gettin kind of hard to get behind the wheel of a bus nowadays yuh know?
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what the fuck?
Isnt it take a dump on Al month? Maybe thats next month?
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Check out my page too!
accidentalsexiness.wordpress.com
blazinwhitetrash:
no but i notice you have a major sentence structure problem..
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what the fuck?
That must be a typo. It's TAKE A Dump on Al Month.
http://doodlewhore.com/
http://www.handsomedevilpress.com
Did ya notice there is notice there is no orientation listed in his status?
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Cocaine habit-forming? Of course not. I ought to know. I've been using it for years.
-Tallulah Bankhead
Cmon Al, You know you want to get all "girlfriend, please!" on us.
Two Queens in a marriage doesn't work. We get it.
BTW does Al have co-workers or career associates?
Can't wait to see what kind of settlement he expects from Star.
Sweetas on May 13, 2008 - 5:19pm.
I saw that kdracofan, my hot tamale! ;) *sigh* She's like frickin crotch rot or something. Surely there's some antibiotic somewhere??? Some anti-fungal cream? A frickin blow torch???
I say we just ignore her. Skip her posts, and starve her to death. That's my plan anyway. She called us "you people." I fucking hate that phrase!!!! What, sane people? Intelligent people? Or just humans in general? *rolls eyes*
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O I always do! But I agree 'you people' REALLY hurts you know!!? LMAO
(you sexy beast you!)
err, Paul Simon. Damn multitasking...
Anyone who ends a MySpace post with a line from a dorky Neil Simon song that only was a hit because everyone loved Chevy Chase's idiot antics in the video deserves the ridicule they receive...
there isnt anything to talk about.
really mr reynolds ought to be flattered anyone cares enough to discuss his marriage with star jones.
star jones is not even dlist, star jones is a former tv personality.
she is no longer a visible presence in the media excluding these discussions about her marriage and divorce.
al reynolds is even less relevant that his soon to be ex wife.
it's not that serious.
Further proof that no one in television land has an IQ above that of the average middle school tween these days.
The 'taking the high road' shit means "The prenup is ironclad and if I say anything bad about her she'll out me publicly.'
Don't worry about it Al. The only people interested in your pretend marriage are the paps. No one else gives a damn.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Surfing the apocalypse.
I saw that kdracofan, my hot tamale! ;) *sigh* She's like frickin crotch rot or something. Surely there's some antibiotic somewhere??? Some anti-fungal cream? A frickin blow torch???
I say we just ignore her. Skip her posts, and starve her to death. That's my plan anyway. She called us "you people." I fucking hate that phrase!!!! What, sane people? Intelligent people? Or just humans in general? *rolls eyes*
Submitted by tonicbitch on May 13, 2008 - 5:16pm.
Note to Al, YOU ARE TOO FUCKING OLD TO BE BLOGGING ABOUT THIS SHIT ON MYSPACE.
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That pretty much sums it all up, doesn't it?
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-When you are fills up with so much love there is no rooms for spellings.
-I translate myself as poor times happen in my wallet.
-She sey BUTT FLAP BITCH EAT MY OATMEAL!
I'm glad it's not just me who thought of that song, when I read this.
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"There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls."
Note to Al, YOU ARE TOO FUCKING OLD TO BE BLOGGING ABOUT THIS SHIT ON MYSPACE.
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A worthy cause: http://dogsindanger.com/ or http://hua.org/
ooooo.....you ladies are in trouble at the Angelina thread!......tisk-tisk...
He needs a peenie opportunity,
He wants a shot in his rumpskin...
ahhahaha Sweetas! xoxo
Unlike Al.
Submitted by Bag of Dirt on May 13, 2008 - 5:07pm.
"To me, labels are for clothes, not people. So…..Please don’t try to define me; don’t try to categorize me; and most of all, don’t label me."
Simple translation - "I am extraordinarily gay."
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Seriously!! I doubt many hetero guys know what a label is, except for "that itchy thing that digs in my ass."
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But then again, what do I know?
"And if you see me, just call me Al"
To me, this is the gayest part of the whole thing! I mean, he's actually referencing PAUL SIMON!!
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It's like judging ducks before they become swans...its stupid. -LA
yew wind some yew loose some two! -FLA
Submitted by zomay on May 13, 2008 - 5:06pm.
Fuck off Gay Al. Over 200,000 people in Asia just lost their homes and family members due to earthquakes and cyclones. Walk a mile in their shoes dumbass. Geez now I see that he was perfect for Star. They both bitch and moan and carry a violin.
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AMEN! It'd be nice if he stopped feeling sorry for himself long enough to get some GD PERSPECTIVE.
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-When you are fills up with so much love there is no rooms for spellings.
-I translate myself as poor times happen in my wallet.
-She sey BUTT FLAP BITCH EAT MY OATMEAL!
Madam S., that's why I love you so. You get right to the point. LOL
"To me, labels are for clothes, not people. So…..Please don’t try to define me; don’t try to categorize me; and most of all, don’t label me."
Simple translation - "I am extraordinarily gay."
Really, that certainly does seem to be what he is hinting at, right? Building a sympathetic foundation before Starlet drops the bomb.
Sweetas,
And if he just said "Me gay." It would take even less time.
Sweetas, ♥ to you! Gay Al wants to know if he's so soft in the middle, why is his weiner so hard?
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But then again, what do I know?
Fuck off Gay Al. Over 200,000 people in Asia just lost their homes and family members due to earthquakes and cyclones. Walk a mile in their shoes dumbass. Geez now I see that he was perfect for Star. They both bitch and moan and carry a violin.
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"What I want people to know is that I am not the caricature portrayed by the media. I am complex, contradictory and capable of great intelligence but also remarkable stupidity. In other words, I am a human being. To me, labels are for clothes, not people. So…..Please don’t try to define me; don’t try to categorize me; and most of all, don’t label me. Instead, JUST GET TO KNOW ME. And if you see me, just call me Al."
Why doesn't he just say "don't call me gay?" It would take less time.