Aww....it looks like they are praying. Well, except for Fetus Archeluta. He looks like he's staring at a juicy banana. He sort of looks like a lil' monkey. So....find out which one of these whores went home after the jump. JUMP!!!!

DUH! I don't know why even bothered watching this shit tonight. I should have browsed the glory holes instead. What a waste! Even that fraudulent psychic Sylvia Browne could have predicted this shit. I only watched to see if either a) Paula Abdul lost it and bit Archeulta's head off or b) David Cook or Fetus went home. None of the above happened tonight.

Fetus is really starting to get to me. I want to slap the Gomer Pile out of him. If I had a tween daughter and she worshiped him, I would kick her out of the house. Plain and simple. This Archuleta obsession must stop! Ugh. He's totally going to win. Fuck this. I'll drown my sorrows in Grey Goose. That's probably what Paula's doing right now. A Grey Goose martini with a sprinkling of Vicodin on top.

Click here to see tonight's elimination



GinaOliviaMallory's picture

I agree. David Cook does have his priorities straight. He seems like one of the nicest guys that have ever been on that show. He's very misunderstood. He's not "smug" ; he just shows that he's not going to make a big emotional deal out of stupid shit, like criticism or whatever else. I like that he's laid back and lets things roll off of him. More men should be like him. Guys these days are emotional fruitcakes.

And 'Bda', not just old white women like him. I know plenty of young blacks and latinas and hot men who think he's the shit and want to have his babies. I wouldn't know if he looks like the bug from 'Men In Black'. I haven't seen it because I don't have horrific taste in movies.

Jerkygirl's picture

American Idol wants David Archuletta to win so that they can create a boy version of Miley Cyrus. That's part of the reason she is so popular because there are no male teen idols for the girls to fawn all over except the Jonas Brothers. It's all fixed.

S'yesha is definitely the best singer of the bunch although I'll be happy if David Cook wins.

No wonder their ratings are going down every week.

Bda's picture

Uh David Cook is NOT HOT! Only old white women like him. He looks like The Bug from fucking Men In Black. Archie is totally going to win! All those tweens out there with cell phones out number the old ladies who don't even know how to use a land line phone.

Submitted by Ella on May 15, 2008 - 1:37am.
I don't really care who wins...
It's a race between David "My-daddy-beats-me-all-the-time" Archuleta or David "My-brother-gots-brain-cancer" Cook.

I remember when everybody was rooting for that Bo Bice fella to win--most talked about how "amazing" he was. But then Carrie Underwood took the title. Next thing ya know, it's like "Bo Bice who?" Seriously, WHERE is he? Sorry to say, I can see David Cook being the next Bo Bice.
But hey don't shoot me, I know I could be wrong...

*****************************

Bo Bice has a serious and debilitating form of Crohn's and has undergone some surgeries since AI. He probably won't be able to tour again.

She still rocks. Just saw her profile on millionaire&celeb
dating site "W e a l t h y R o m a n c e. co m" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.

jmarkiemark's picture

Curious George Archuletta needs to GO.

Toxilicious's picture
Pers's picture

I hope that if little David wins, he hires himself a fucking scary lawyer, puts his $$$ in a trust, and disappears from his Dad's life.

I'm scared to see what happens to little David if he doesn't win: "Daddy! Daddy! Noooo! I tried my best, please - don't put me down the pit! Noooo! I don't want to rub the lotion on my skin! Daddy!!!"
.•´¯`•-><-•´¯`•..•´¯`•-><-•´¯`•..•´¯`•-><-•´¯`•..•´¯`•-><-•´¯`•.

calitabonita's picture

hahaha, lohohater. i agree. david cook is the hottest piece ever to douche it up on this show. i dont even watch this trash but he caught my eye somehow. we should find his hotass and drink his milkshake. draaaaaainage!
homeboy looks like he's packin, too.

Ella's picture

I don't really care who wins...
It's a race between David "My-daddy-beats-me-all-the-time" Archuleta or David "My-brother-gots-brain-cancer" Cook.

I remember when everybody was rooting for that Bo Bice fella to win--most talked about how "amazing" he was. But then Carrie Underwood took the title. Next thing ya know, it's like "Bo Bice who?" Seriously, WHERE is he? Sorry to say, I can see David Cook being the next Bo Bice.
But hey don't shoot me, I know I could be wrong...

Lohohater's picture

i have never watched Idol until this season. reason #1 - jason castro lives in the same town i live in. reason #2 - david cook is a hot, juicy, sweet piece of ass. i would suck him raw.

yolie's picture

Dorothy:

Oh good, you too! Everyone is always talking about it either on the morning radio show on my way to work, at work and all over the news. And I just think, why??? I can pretend to know what they are talking about, thanks to this site!

Dorothy Zbornak's picture

I don't watch it either!!
**hugs the other outcasts**

_________________________________________
I guess if you're an idiot with a hearing problem, you do things like that.

vanyvrgs's picture

Submitted by parissucksliterally on May 14, 2008 - 11:06pm.
Hey vany! I don't watch this show either.

Hello! *smiles* I do not think you are missing a thing.... Check out Fantasia in the top thread if you had not already her sexy moves, her hair, the way she says YEAH, yeah, yeah....her voice.....I hate to say it but that dude that looked like side show bob from the first season was less laughable ....

Well, got to go to sleep... have a great night everyone.

____________________________________________
Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strenght.

Save an animal in a shelter: Http://dogsindanger.com

Get lost: http://dharmasecrets.com

yolie's picture

Oh good, I was starting to think something was wrong with me!

parissucksliterally's picture

Hey vany! I don't watch this show either.

*************************************************
“All you gotta do is say yes- don't deny what you feel, let me undress you baby..."
- Floetry "Say Yes"

vanyvrgs's picture

Submitted by yolie on May 14, 2008 - 10:59pm.
Am I the only one that doesn't watch this show?

I do not. Everytime I get to hear the so called winners, I am convinced I made the right decision. ____________________________________________
Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strenght.

Save an animal in a shelter: Http://dogsindanger.com

Get lost: http://dharmasecrets.com

yolie's picture

Am I the only one that doesn't watch this show?

It went down just as you said it would for the final two.

madam s.'s picture

I just realized that I posted a comment about Fantasia the Chicken Dancer on this thread. Oops. Time for bed.

And hey to all of the night crew! xoxoxo

tonicbitch's picture

Archie blows and not in a good way. Anyway unless he puts out a country, rock, alternative, r&b, Latin, or gangsta rap album, he's not going to get any play in my city.

-------------------------------------------------
A worthy cause: http://dogsindanger.com/ or http://hua.org/

SassyTex's picture

Little Archie not only looks like a little monkey, but he also looks like a little Monchichi. He does have a great voice but zero appeal. I feel bad for him b/c of his father's ways...but not bad enough to vote for him.

Cookie gets my votes and will win it all!

------------------------------------------------
**I'll be too busy awsoming all over the place.**

Does anyone think that kind of half fainting thing Fetus Head does when they announce who stays and who gets kicked off, is real? And if it is, will he pass out if he comes in second to David Alien-Head Cook?

dead-actress's picture

You're right, little Socky. He does have monkey ears! lol
Hi! Button! Now get off the hamper before you break something!

"Anything you can't get out of a bottle of vodka, you don't need."..........
Ava Gardner......

Karma Police's picture

I knew it would end up like this but Seyesha was my girl since the time she sang Chain Of Fools perfectly with laryngitis or whatever. She'll be fine cuz she is ubertalented and gorgeous.

I think Fetus David will take it and fall right in line with Miley Cyrus, High School Musical and all that. He'll have a few good years until that wave of music is over.

Aunt Bea's picture

If Archie doesn't win, daddy is going to beat his ass. I wonder how many votes this kid gets just from sympathy?

jammer's picture

I've said it once, I'll say it again, David Cook has FTM tranny face. I mean LOOK at that "facial hair". SCANDAL!
^^^
EAT SHIT AND LIVE!

Alltheprettyones's picture

David A. is happy to make the top 2. Now daddy won't touch his no-no hole tonight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There's a lot of pretty, pretty ones
That want to get you high
But all the pretty, pretty ones
Will leave you low and blow your mind

We're all stars now in the dope show

Amazing, I love her voice, I just saw her profile on a celeb dating site **M illionai reloves. CO M**last week! It is said she is interested in dating wealthy good-looking guys on that site!

tonicbitch's picture

Actually, I think MelonHead might take this one.

-------------------------------------------------
A worthy cause: http://dogsindanger.com/ or http://hua.org/

jussayin's picture

yawn...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Arthur "No offense intended"
Tick "None comprehended."

Paquita's picture

Fetus head is gonna win...boring!!!!
but apparently fetus head knows how to carry a tune.

--------------------------------
"Hahaha....you are eating my caca and paying for it. Meeeeow." No gracias. MK

BEAT's picture

I sort of wanted Sayesha to win just so the Davids would lose. David C. is smug as fuck and and David A. is boring as fuck. Basically, they're two lousy fucks!

****
You can't stop the BEAT!

"A little hoo-ha, a little poot-poot, hee-ha, a little foo-fah..."

This is totally fixed. Tell me there are that many Mormon girls screaming and voting for Fetus Head.

Mr. President's picture

Archie is just relieved that he won't have to go home to one hell of a beating tonight. Sad the way these stage parents use these kids.
*******************
Yeah!!! I like using the word dude. It saves me from actually having to think.

moonmaid's picture

What happened to Fantasia's voice? She sounded like Janis Joplin after a 3 day bender.

Love the sock monkey avatar. He does look like a sock monkey. In fact, I dub him David "Sock Monkey" Archuleta!

Love David Cook. Seems to have his priorities in order. It was cool that he went back to thank his music teacher.

Sock-Monkey's picture

He sort of looks like a lil' monkey."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*standing on top of hamper* *stomping little sock monkey foot* *sock monkey hands on hips* Hey! MK! I resent that! Then again...he does have monkey ears! I know about stuff like that. lol

~"~"~"~"~~Mess with me and I'll bite you!.....Monquita Loca~~"~"~"~"~

Electric's picture

testing

tonicbitch's picture

c) Fantasia's awesomely bad performance d) Simon gaping in awe at her ginormous cameltoe.

David Archuleta fucking sucks, BOOOOOO.

-------------------------------------------------
A worthy cause: http://dogsindanger.com/ or http://hua.org/

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