The Hogans Really Care
First of all, I love the lady in the middle of those two leathery assholes in the picture above. She's hot. Anyway......
TMZ got a hold of several taped phone conversations between Nick Hogan and his family from jail. Yes, they tape that shit in jail, so keep your mouth shut the next you get arrested for DUI or prostitution. I know how you do it.
In one conversation with his mother, Nick starts balling like a hungry baby, because he wants to go outside. He doesn't even have a window! How am I going to sleep tonight knowing that poor Nick Hogan can't even look at the moon?
I'm sure the real reason he's crying has to do with his newly raw asshole. It's ok, Nick. The pain goes away after a few days. I'm speaking from experience, of course.
Nick also says that it's unfair he's in jail for a "car accident." He fails to mention the fact that his so-called best friend, John Graziano, is in a permanent vegetative state thanks to him. Click here to hear that conversation.
Even worse is a conversation Nick had with his daddy about John Graziano. Hulk actually said, "God laid some heavy shit on that kid, I don't know what he was into." Nick responds with, "He was a negative person." Nick quickly changes the subject by talking about some stupid ass reality project. Click here to hear that conversation
Eeesh. These chewed up pieces of jerky acted like they were so concerned during Nick's hearing. They cried about how John was a son to them and blah...blah...blah... Are they for real? We all know the answer to that one.
On that note, it's boozing time! I'll make sure to NOT think of Nick crying for mommy's fake bosom in his teeny tiny cell while I'm downing my 5th martini.
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Lory:
I heard Vito got those as paymennt for a job he pulled for the cat
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
RADIO! Good luck in Palm Springs hor! Have a gudden m8! I ain't working on a centerfold. Mishy is the artist of the house. I'll be asking a sample from her. Have the best of times! XOXO
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Let me dirty up your mind.
NITE HOT BITCH!!!!
madam s.:
"she had fun, disenfranchisized, politically-correct, societally-challenging bags. "
She certainly didn't have gravity-challenging funbags
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
OMG! Lory that's why the lezbie librarian did the tongue V at me, I thought she were forking me teh evil eye. I were ascairt that she knew my secret thoughts. Now I need to look up munchincarpetlikeapro.com and git r dun. That or read the forum, the forum teaches you how to lick a kitteh and not smell it, it's a win/win. The forum also teaches you how to warshurundieslaknew.com
River, Mishy's cat is a serial mouse killer. If cousin Vito stole those knickers from that pussy, then Vito will be swimming with the fish very soon. Not his kind of fish but whatever, beggars can't be choosers.
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Let me dirty up your mind.
I gots to get some sleep, I'm hittin Palm Springs in the morning! Mishy, good luck with your HAWT centerfold and e-mail me sometime, bitch, cuz I love ya. Lory, same to you except for the centerfold part, unless you are workin on some sexay centerfold that I don't know about. xoxoxoxoxoxoxo ya two hot slurts. We'll talk soon.
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Dlisted's a hellava drug.
"Paris is fucking lame. She's more offensive to me than anything. She's a total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut. I pray that my daughter will not turn out like her." - Dave Grohl
Team V.,
John would've disagreed. He thought she had fun, disenfranchisized, politically-correct, societally-challenging bags. And those, my friend, are some pretty fun bags.
Lory:
Those belonged to mishma's cat - now those panties REALLY smell like pussy!
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
Mishy: Then it's safe to say t hat troll #4 is in hell even if it's not dead. That makes my heart warm. I know how those bitches from the public libraries can get, they do not let me put my tent on the main entrance. If you want restricted access to exclusive pages like HOmadebombswithfertilizer.com and kittehsinvictoraissecretunderwear.com then you have to clean the floor or blow the manager and I am a lazy bitch...
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Let me dirty up your mind.
Riverchic, then what is that flimsy little rag he was holding for dear life?. Vito won't approve. Either someone lie told him or he stoled them from the wrong passerby.
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Let me dirty up your mind.
Submitted by madam s. on May 24, 2008 - 1:49am.
Yoko is a vicious prude.
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And she lacks funbags.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
Nite PSL & Deb. :)
☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠
Go home and get your fucking shine box.
Yoko is a vicious prude.
Troll No 4 is in Gitmo, I send it Playboy and Jenny Craig with Richard Simmon's Sweating to the DEAR GOD I'M BLIND tapes. He says that I make his hell more hellish and that touches me, deep inside. Pretty please stop with the caps, everytime a sublime uppercase missive gets typed a troll gets banned and 57657656795 new myspaces are opened, it's outrageous. Bitches be stalking my cats on myspace, lory, it's not safe here. If it can't be safe here where can it be safe and I mean the public library. They won't let me look up HOmadebombswithfertilizer.com the bastards
Lory:
"RIVERCHIC, THAT WASN'T TV. THAT WAS MY COUSIN VITO, HE TOLD ME TO TELL YRE HE LIKES THE WAY YOUR KNICKERS SMELL"
Who says I wear knickers? Nothing like an unfurnished basement, baby!
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
I tried Japanese box making, but Yoko said no, too.
"I tried making Japanese boxes but Yoko said Oh NO!"
Different spin.
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Ecru-logically challenged is the new "bone"
Submitted by parissucksliterally on May 24, 2008 - 1:46am.
Nite, PSL, who truly doesn't suck.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
Submitted by madam s. on May 24, 2008 - 1:44am.
I tried Japanese box making, but Yoko said no, too.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
Team Valtrex:
"Subliminal funbags..."
How's about astral-projection funbags?
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
RIVERCHIC, THAT WASN'T TV. THAT WAS MY COUSIN VITO, HE TOLD ME TO TELL YRE HE LIKES THE WAY YOUR KNICKERS SMELL. I AM JUST SENDING A MESSAGE. DON'T BLAME VITO'S DEBAUCHERY ON MY ASS. KK?
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Let me dirty up your mind.
good night everyone...I am tired- it's been a long day.
May our Saturday be Troll-Free.
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"and the oscar goes to psl for her emmy winning comment"
- my educated Troll 5/23/08
nite, Deb
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
DebFrmHell,
I seriously have been pretty close to doing that. But I got all these books on Japanese box making, Chinese joinery, and furniture making. And I am the most stubborn girl you will EVER meet. I'll be fucked if I don't create some damn good furniture tonight.
Yeah, I'm probably not a great Friday night date.
But DebFrmHell... it would be fun for you to be my girlfriend that hangs out while I struggle and you could help a bit. (Yes, you could drink beer while you watch me be crazy).
DebFrmHell:
"Madam, furniture assembly is much more fun when you burn the directions in the fireplace and open all the bags and mix up the parts. Now that's a hobby!"
And don't forget to do a couple of keg-stands & a few bong rips before you start. You may just come up with something way cooler than what the instructions would have!
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
DebFrmHell:
"Madam, furniture assembly is much more fun when you burn the directions in the fireplace and open all the bags and mix up the parts. Now that's a hobby!"
And don't forget to do a couple of keg-stands & a few bong rips before you start. You may just come up with something way cooler than what the instructions would have!
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
Gotta sleep, still have about 400 miles to go. It has gone from subliminal to sublime here...
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Ecru-logically challenged is the new "bone"
HEY RADIO!!!!!MUAAH!!!!!XOXOXO!
MISHY: EVEN IN 2006 CAPS MADE YER HEAD ACHE WITH THE INTENSITY OF A THOUSAND SUNS. EVERYTIME I CAP A KITTEH GETS HIS HEAD BLOWN. SO I GUESS I HAVE TO STOP IT TOO. IT GAVE ME A MIGRAINE TOO. REMEMBER YOUR 2006 TROLL? TROLL #4 THAT IS. WHERE IS THE MOTHER FUCKER? IS IT TRUE THAT COUNTY GOT A HOLD OH ITS ASS AND IS ROTTING IN LAS VEGAS COUNTY JAIL?. I CAN STOP THE CAPS NOW BUT YEW WILL SWEET TALK ME INTO IT. KK?
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Let me dirty up your mind.
Submitted by riverchic on May 24, 2008 - 1:39am.
Subliminal funbags are cool too, no forgiveness required.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
Team Valtrex:
Sorry! Please forgive me?!
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
RADIO CAN BE ON MAH LAWN, AS LONG AS SHE DOESN'T TROD UPON MAH POT PLANTS, I IS GROOMING EM TO BE HIGH TIMES NEXT CENTERFOLD
"Oh, Jeez, Daddy, I don't know how this happened. I mean, I do, but couldn't your "Largest Pythons In The World" have squeezed some sense (i.e. panic) into the judge? I mean, FUCK, Dad, this jail time for turning my friend into a vegetable because I'm a dumb schmuck thing has REALLY put a damper on my social life. And I think it may effect you, too, because you are a "Professional" wrestler, and your credibility is so high among the American population..."
(Excuse me - I laughed so freaking hard that I shot around 6 ounces of Miller Lite out of my nose onto my monitor - DAMN, bitch asses, that HURTS!!!!!)
Bite my big, fat, mama ass, Nicky Boy. Dyin's not good enough for ya. Hangin's not good enough for ya....
The spawn of false celebrities suck. If that were me or my old man (um, regular everyday people), we'd be rotting in prison. Poor Nick. Wait - let me get a Kleenex...
Submitted by DebFrmHell on May 24, 2008 - 1:35am.
Ummm, you just put the words "fun" and "bags" in the same sentence. Are you getting subliminal on my drunk ass?
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
Submitted by madam s. on May 24, 2008 - 1:34am.
I miss you too. Hey, try tab A in slot B. It fucking rules!
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
Madam, furniture assembly is much more fun when you burn the directions in the fireplace and open all the bags and mix up the parts. Now that's a hobby!
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Ecru-logically challenged is the new "bone"
Mishma is THEE OG Dlister - she can do whatever the fuckety fuck she wants!
High Times is a pretty good deal, all I ever got for babysitting was a promise for a massage with a happy ending that never came through.
________________________
Dlisted's a hellava drug.
"Paris is fucking lame. She's more offensive to me than anything. She's a total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut. I pray that my daughter will not turn out like her." - Dave Grohl
Does Nick have a boner pointing towards his Dad???
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Go home and get your fucking shine box.
Submitted by riverchic on May 24, 2008 - 1:31am
Thought that was our secret. Pick up your own copy of Guns&Ammo.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
Team V.,
On page four of the directions of there was something about connecting the funbags to cam lock 4 with wooden dowel 2. I think I could have used your wisdom.
P.S. I always miss you when we're apart.
STOP DESCRIBING UR FRIDAY NIGHT LORY, IT'S UNBECOMING AND TOO KLASSY FOR THIS JOINT, CUZ YOU CAN'T SPELL SEXSAY WITHOUT Q AND Z, GAWD!
STRANGERS PAID FOR MAH WATCHTOWER SUBSCRIPTION, DOES THAT COUNT? I FEEL THE LOVE EVERY WEEK, HEATHENS
mishma:
"STRANGERS DO NOT PAY 4 UR SOLDIER OF FORTUNE MAGAZINE"
Oh, yeah! Well a stranger paid for mine! Although, it was some weird dude who wore a camo jacket, lived in a tent in the city park and talked to park benches. He was always saying how the "day of purification is upon us..."
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
MICHAELANGELO COULD HAVE USED SOME FORUM WISDOM TOO. HE WOULD BE GRASPING THE REALITY OF MODERN SANCTITY AS WE SPEAK. HE WOULD HAVE TATTOOED THE SISTINE CHAPEL ON HIS ASS CHEEK AND REPRODUCED IT ON THE SUNSET BOULEVARD $CIENTOLOGY CENTER. THE 4810 SB WOULD HAVE MORE VISITORS AND KOOL AID WOULD BE DRUNK WHILE HASHISH IS BEING SMOKED BY OUR THETANS WHILE WE MAKE ARRANGEMENTS TO GET OUR TETAS DONE.
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Let me dirty up your mind.
Submitted by madam s. on May 24, 2008 - 1:26am.
like assembling furniture at midnight? I'll just focus on the funbags, thankyouverymuch.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
MISHMA IS CHANNELING MISHMA...I JUST HAVEN'T OK fuck the uppercase it makes mah head hurt, I were on this bitch back in 06...when gas was 2 dollars, now get off my lawn!
Submitted by mishma on May 23, 2008 - 9:21pm.
WHEN I CUM I GO EE, DOES THAT COUNT? HI RADIO! NOW STOP STALKING MY CATS!
^^^^^^^^^^^
MUAH! Your cats are just too sexy, with their provocative Victoria's Secret silkies. KLASSY!
________________________
Dlisted's a hellava drug.
"Paris is fucking lame. She's more offensive to me than anything. She's a total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut. I pray that my daughter will not turn out like her." - Dave Grohl
Is Mishma channeling COMINGBACK? Sigh... I truly miss that one.
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I'm tired of this asinine bullshit.
LORY, STOP LIEING, STRANGERS DO NOT PAY 4 UR SOLDIER OF FORTUNE MAGAZINE, GAWD, NOW MY NAYBOUR GOT ME A PRESCRIPTION FOR HIGH TIMES MAGAZINE TO BEBESIT MR SNUGGLEBOOTS
r5, living proof that reverse psycology does NOT WORK...lol.
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Ecru-logically challenged is the new "bone"
ahhahaa Team V.,
I have to admit. There's an attractive quality to a man that really has a firm grasp on his focus/destiny on life.
But seriously. I want you to find a hobby.
Team Valtrex:
I see...
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."