Thursday, June 5th 2008
There's No Way This Ho Is Knocked Up
Wonky McValtrex having a baby is the final sign of the apocalypse. The Gods above would not do this to us. The world cannot end. I still haven't done the tango with Phoebe Price underneath a chicken cutlet canopy with Rojo Caliente playing the violin in the background.
Either Benji Madden has some super fatty jizz or Wonky is doing this on purpose for attention. It's probably both!
Wenn



♥ OK she already kicked off those rumors! she isnt preggers but she will make a fantastic mom in 2009!! i hope its a girl!! I seen pictures of paris when she was little she i was soo cute! i hope it looks like her!!! that couldnt be better! i ♥ u paris!! you look great and im so glad you are happy and found someone to make u feel special!! way 2 go benji!!! Paris if you have a girl... u gottta show it your modeling skills and singing skills!!! you surley got something there!! it will be the happiest baby in the world girl or boy!!! i cant WAIT till 2009!!!!!!!!!! Yay!!!
She looks beautiful. I saw her profile on millionaire&celeb dating site ----"AffluentBachelors.com" ----last week. It is said she is dating young billionaire on that site.
It could also be Asshole Coocher doing his lame ass show.
U AINT LYING IF THAT HO KNOCKED UP ITS THE END OF THE FUCKING WORLD I FEEL SO SORRY FOR THE KID IT WOULD HAVE THE SKANKYIEST MOTHER ALIVE AND WARTS ON ITS FACE
THIS IS MY WROLD YALL HOS JUST LIVE IN IT
WWW.MYSPACE.COM/BUNNY420
if she's not pregnant, she should have worn some spanx
letinstar: "ewww...this means benji didn't use a condom with this pig..."
He doesn't look like the type who would use a rubber... Blech...
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"Oh, Lisa. Just take your anger, turn it into a little hard ball and swallow it down. Then, release it at an appropriate time. Like the time when Daddy hit the referee with a whisky bottle."
ewww...this means benji didn't use a condom with this pig...
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my new ringtone...hotness...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xsW58hO8Mok
God please tell me Ashton Kutcher has something to do with this, but why would he use her as a joke twice? I think I just answered my own question.
Submitted by EyeRoll on June 6, 2008 - 10:36am.
You would think the turkey baster would have melted on contact.
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TimTams Rule!
Submitted by Sheeps on June 5, 2008 - 2:50pm.
I'm just amazed that someone had unprotected sex with her.
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Maybe she bought some of Vincent Gallo's sperm on eBay and used a turkey baster
Holly, no hazmat suit could protect someone from something comes from her black hole. I'm thinking it'll be like at a nuclear power plant. She'd be in one of those uranium room things with the gloves attached to the walls.
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TimTams Rule!
Also, if the baby wasn't taken by the CDC upon birth, you know the maid would find it in the closet eventually...you know, like the puppies.
Looks bumpy for sure, but she's always been shameless enough to do ANYTHING so we'll throw her a bone and notice her existence. She's definitely desperado enough to strap a fake baby to herself.
Let us pray that's true at least, otherwise her baby will be taked by the CDC upon exposure to air. I imagine the birth to be like the scene in E.T. with the plastic bubble boy enclosures and hazmat suits.
Submitted by Phoebe on June 6, 2008 - 7:01am.
Does Art Bell know about this?
Haha. Good one. I doubt this bitch is pregnant for pretty much every reason everybody has said. Nobody's posted anything about her in awhile so this is just the cunt's way of getting back in the blogs.
In the off chance she is pregnant, I hope he (typo leaving it in) dies while giving birth and the child grows up happy and anonymous.
That's the best thing she could do for it.
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TimTams Rule!
Oh. Shit.
Anyone know where I can pick up a fire and brimstone-repellent poncho? 'Cause the End Times are a-comin'.
Actually going through with this pregnancy will be the first of what I'm sure will be a long line of abuses committed against that poor child.
totally agree life.
she is one of those females that is always competing with other girls.
always trying to one up another chick.
but imo, she won't get pregnant because being pregnant is like being fat and shit..
Damn, is she really that obsessed with competing with Nicole that she would not only get with Nicole's man twin but act like she is having a child too like Nicole just had?? sheeesh, get original for once in your life, girl!
"Single White Female" sickness is right!!
"The More You Know, The Less You Need"
She has way too many STD's to still be fertile. Besides, even Benji wouldn't stick a bare one into that oozing pustule.
Does Art Bell know about this?
Oh, I forgot to add that if Paris really IS pregnant, then I'm sure it's just something she is doing for attention. The baby will be an 'accesory' for her until she is bored with it, and then who knows what will happen. Let's just hope she isn't pregnant.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on June 5, 2008 - 2:56pm.
Submitted by Faith on June 5, 2008 - 1:51pm.
I thought you couldn't have babies if you had herpes.
Am I wrong?
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yes, you are wrong. You can't deliver vaginally, but you can have babies.
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You can deliver vaginally, so long as you are not experiencing a current outbreak.
I'm just amazed that someone had unprotected sex with her.
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Borregos
If she is, that poor baby is going to have her huge feet and hands, and Benji's douchiness. Pair all that up with possible Herp.
Disney can make a movie about it.
<3-------------------------------<3
Welcome to White Oprah's School of Puppetry.
Por favor, mantenganse allejado de las puertas.
Submitted by Faith on June 5, 2008 - 1:51pm.
I thought you couldn't have babies if you had herpes.
Am I wrong?
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yes, you are wrong. You can't deliver vaginally, but you can have babies.
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“Sometimes my mind don't shake and shift....but most of the time it does..."
-Fiona Apple "Fast As You Can"
This bitch is a full blown psychopath. Single white female, anyone? As if wanting the the life of Nicole Richie is something to aspire to! The Maddens are lunkheaded douchebags.
I thought you couldn't have babies if you had herpes.
Am I wrong?
I think she's jealous of Nicole. It's obvious. It's like this immature game she is playing to try to one up Nicole and be back in the spotlight. Sad...
Does anyone picture the cloverfield parasites when contemplating what will spontaneously fall out of Paris's loose cootch somewhere around the 22nd week?
She's not pregnant, she's putting on weight so that she can be a parade float at CrabFest 2009.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
This is not even funny
I've said this before, but I don't know how a fetus could survive, let alone grow, in such a toxic environment as her womb is bound to be.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on June 5, 2008 - 2:48pm.
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Ugh. I'd disown that slut. I'd punch her in her uterus first though.
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"Tact is just not saying true stuff - I'll pass."
Q Charisma, yes...they are seen going out together, but I don't know how Nicky stands it..then again, she's been dealing with Paris for 24 years, she has to be used to it by now....
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“This feels like my first real marriage. The first one was a show, the second one was a con, and this one is the real deal."
- Charlie Sheen told guests at his wedding
as the old saying goes... "you can't turn a HOE into a housewife!" apocalypse insuing.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on June 5, 2008 - 1:05pm.
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Does her sister even speak to this whore anymore? Because I wouldn't - she's so disgusting with her incessant need to be the absolute center of attention at all times. She doesn't even care who she hurts in the process, even if it's her own flesh and blood or her alleged BFF. Stupid bitch.
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"Tact is just not saying true stuff - I'll pass."
I really hope this is not true. If there is anyone in this world that doesn't deserve to be a parent, it's this stank skank!!!
~SAS
she's done enough pix to know how to make her gut look 'pregnant' - one should look to the face - nope. she may have persuaded herself that she is p. (pseudopregnancy) or maybe she bought one, somewhere.
What a no-talent, attention-grabbing, STD-laden, skank biscuit-y whore!
That's all.
www.myspace.com/triston
Bwha ha ha ha, Yourmomate!
Submitted by Green Is Good on June 5, 2008 - 12:26pm.
It's clear Parisite reads all stuff written about her.
Notice in the above photos, she tries to keep her man-hands curled, or holds her cell or purse to camouflage her giant paws. And she parts her hair on the Wonky side. Like that hides it.
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We should all start talking about how disgusting she looks because she hasn't yet been hit by a truck.
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Cross over children. All are welcome. All welcome. Go into the Light.
I'm sure Wonky's uterus is like a lunar landscape, gray, cratered, and lacking gravity.
♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥
The world is full of little people like you
They have to read a book to learn what to do
oh god please tell me she isn't pregnant..
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Honestly, this girl needs to dig a hole and stick her head in it.
She has no intelligence, no class, no beauty, no charm NOTHING doing for her.
Submitted by Lucy Goosey on Rumor Willis
It's clear Parisite reads all stuff written about her.
Notice in the above photos, she tries to keep her man-hands curled, or holds her cell or purse to camouflage her giant paws. And she parts her hair on the Wonky side. Like that hides it.
Submitted by its a secret on June 5, 2008 - 6:18pm.
She looks like Xtina - YIKES!
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...apart from the fact that Christina wears 60lbs more make up than the tramp does, is better looking that the tramp, is more talented, makes a better tranny...
The fucking whore has been trying to look like Xtina alot lately, fucking dumb bitch, GET YOUR OWN STLYE YOU WORTHLESS HAG!
~*~"Me and my husband rarely get a few mommy, daddy nights out" ~ Xtina to E! on May 31st
"I eat and eat and eat and I never get any thinner" ~ Homer Simpson~*~
Rock The Vote
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5y0bdOqL3AI
People, it's a sign! The end times are near! I am bunkering up in my backyard bomb shelter, and I suggest you do the same! Gather water and nonperishables and seek shelter!
♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥
The world is full of little people like you
They have to read a book to learn what to do
Submitted by Green Is Good on June 5, 2008 - 9:20am.
Parisite is riding Nicole's coattails. The ONLY reason Parisite is dating this Madden twin is because Nicole is with the other one.
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BINGO!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh fuck this cunt.
I doubt her diseased womb is even capable of carrying a viable fetus.
Bitch just want to be like everyone else.
FOLLOWER!
Another Tranny Clown mommy in the making? God I hope not.
One way to get to the bottom of this mystery is to just call her fatty or fat to her face and watch that bloat disappear. She will suck that gut back in.
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Hey, Fucko, we like to call it inter-species erotica.
She looks like Xtina - YIKES!
I hope that she is not preggos. I hope that her kid doesn't have a disability. She will make a horrible mother.
And I thought her womb was uninhabitable.