JLo Thinks She's A Shit Mom
Woe is JLo. All she wants in the world is to be a good mother to her Dragon Tales Twins. Well, that and she really wants a castle made out of diamonds, bronzer and animal fur. Anyway, a source told Closer Magazine (via Showbiz Spy) that JLo thinks nothing she does is good enough for her twinsies.
The source said, "Jennifer wants to be the perfect mother, but she crumbles if any normal little thing goes wrong. If the twins cry, she thinks it's because she's a bad mom, and bursts into tears herself. Marc had to sit her down and make her understand that she's a good mom and it's normal for babies to cry."
In JLo's defense, the DT Twins are probably only bursting into tears when Skeletor is around because they think he's going to devour their souls.
And PLEASE! Who the hell is this source?! They really want us to believe that JLo cries and also that she spends time with the DT Twins? The pr bitch she hired to make her look like mother of the year (No offense, White Oprah) is working overtime. From the picture above to the story about how she fired her nannies to this story! That pr bitch deserves a gold star.
The "source" goes on to say, "Marc is concerned that she's not eating properly or sleeping because she's obsessed with looking after the twins. If she leaves them with her own mother for a couple of hours to have some time off, she beats herself up about it and feels guilty. Marc has forced Jen to take some time off and have a massage to unwind, but she even struggled to relax during that. He wants her to stop worrying abut the kind of mother she's being and just enjoy it."
The laughs never end! I can't wait to hear the story about how JLo changes diapers. I mean, she doesn't even change Skeletor's diaper! Why would she change the diapers of her own baby?!
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Submitted by Daniee on June 19, 2008 - 10:59pm.
Why are you all so mean hearted?
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Welcome to Dlisted! A place to bash celebs & not kiss all their asses. We're not just "mean" to JHO, we're "mean" to all celebs. Deal with it.
~*~I will be
Strong on my own
I will see through the rain
I will find my way
I will keep on
Traveling down the road
Till I finally reach my dream
Till I’m living, and I’m breathing
My destiny, yeah yeah ~ CA, I Will Be~*~
Submitted by Daniee on June 19, 2008 - 11:59pm.
Why are you all so mean hearted? Sounds like she might have a postpartum mood disorder. :(
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You meant postpartum depression? Then you don't give a flying f*ck about babies.
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Shoes are the exclamation point at the end of the fashion statement.
-Laurie Schecter
Hekki,
It's funny that you think J-Lo changes diapers!
J-Lo...Jello...Jello arse J-Lo....Huh? What?
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“Ctrl+P” print! “Ctrl+P” print! “Ctrl+P” print!
Why are you all so mean hearted? Sounds like she might have a postpartum mood disorder. :(
Something stinks here... something tells me it's just another publicity stunt, "leaked" from JLO herself in order to obtain some sympathy.
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Shoes are the exclamation point at the end of the fashion statement.
-Laurie Schecter
Why is this sea hag stressed out?
She has 2 nannies for the Dragon Twins, plus an entourage of:
Personal Chef
Personal Assistant
Stylist
Driver
Maids
Butler
She needs to STFU.
DeeDee: Right? I knew a woman who had nails like that and kept them the whole time her daughter was a baby. I have no idea how she changed diapers.
And also, my mom was a nurse and they were required to keep their nails short because you can scratch patients and also feces and dirt and germs can accumulate underneath them. I can tell you for sure that changing baby poop diapers is messy. I would not want to have to scrub under my nails every time I changed a poopy diaper.
I think Michelle Duggar must give JLo a call.
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Shoes are the exclamation point at the end of the fashion statement.
-Laurie Schecter
The reason those beybeys are crying is because mama JLo is sportin' hooker nails. She keeps poking them in the eyes. Someone call CPS!
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Things do not change; we change. ~Thoreau
The only reason I think she might actually spend time taking care of those babies is because she's a little diva perfectionist. She is the type of person who wants to be good at EVERYTHING and can't admit that there are some things she can't do. (My goddamn SIL is like this, and cries if she doesn't do everything perfectly the first time).
JLo has been successful so far, because she's worked hard, used her attitude and bullied her way. Unfortunately, those tactics don't work on babies.
Another reason I think is because Marc Anthony expects her to be a "real" woman and cook and clean and take care of his children. After all, she's still just a woman. And I am certain that he likes taking her down a peg.
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on June 19, 2008 - 3:19pm.
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LMFAO!!! So true.
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"Tact is just not saying true stuff - I'll pass."
MK...you crack me up, But I too dont believe any of this.
"The pr bitch she hired"...she hired a Puerto Rican? O how nice of her.....tee-heee...
Well if she wants to be a good mom, she can start by removing them from those boiling Obi-Wan Kenobi wraps.
...somebody please tell these 2 douches how to hold a baby!....cuddle them, dammit!....and against the advice of Skeletor - FEED THEM!!!...
Its kind of eerie how they are holding each baby exactly the same in the above pic....and GEEZ...is everything they own monogrammed?? She probably has that done so she can remember their names...
Um...Mark could you bring me Emily...er...Eliza...er....hey, whats the name on her blanket say??? OHHHHHH thats right...Emme...got it.
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Behind every good man there is a woman, and that woman was Martha Washington man, and everyday George would come home, she would have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man when he come in the door, man she was a hip, hip, hip lady, man. -Slater "Dazed and Confused"
Submitted by parissucksliterally on June 19, 2008 - 12:53pm.
And NovaNightly....yeah, there is NO WAY ON HELL she is taking care of the twins herself. She doesn't even tie her own fucking sholeaces!
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I doubt she owns a pair of shoes with shoelaces...lol.
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Behind every good man there is a woman, and that woman was Martha Washington man, and everyday George would come home, she would have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man when he come in the door, man she was a hip, hip, hip lady, man. -Slater "Dazed and Confused"
@Stoney- Well if you are my ex-boyfriend, nothing and not only does he enjoy lying, he is also extremely gifted at it. He would make a great PR bitch, and he would do it for cheap.
Ya see, this is what they call a "planted story."
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Hold it. Hooolllddd it. Wait a minute. WAIT A MINUTE... WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?
Nothing Ralph, Carlos is just teaching us the mambo.
didnt this woman allow her kids to be photographed for a rag?
whats with the heavy wraps.
..marc anthony has 5 kids including these twins by three different women including jlo.
loser.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on June 19, 2008 - 3:53pm.
Well then its agreed dont worry Jen we think your a shit mom too your right again!
ubmitted by Stay-lo on June 19, 2008 - 12:49pm.
I don’t believe those twins of hers were conceived naturally one bit and it pisses me off that she wont admit it , there’s a lot of woman with fertility issues that she could have given hope to by being forth coming.
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I agree!
And NovaNightly....yeah, there is NO WAY ON HELL she is taking care of the twins herself. She doesn't even tie her own fucking sholeaces!
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“Fuck Soulja Boy! Eat a dick! This ni–a single handedly killed Hip Hop. That shit is such garbage man.”
- Ice T on the sad state of rap music
I have twins myself and I KNOW how difficult it can get at times. For a woman like J-Lo who has always seemed to be a stuck-up self-centered bitch...i can see how she might break down trying to do all of it herself. Which i actually doubt that she is doing. Anyway...I still feel bad when i choose to go to the gym at night instead of spending time with my boys(they are 3). So i guess what im saying is i can relate.
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Behind every good man there is a woman, and that woman was Martha Washington man, and everyday George would come home, she would have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man when he come in the door, man she was a hip, hip, hip lady, man. -Slater "Dazed and Confused"
I don’t believe those twins of hers were conceived naturally one bit and it pisses me off that she wont admit it , there’s a lot of woman with fertility issues that she could have given hope to by being forth coming.
What a twat.This "source" is JHO herself. She hasn't made any magazine covers or anything lately, so she needs to keep herself in the news.
"Submitted by C U Next Tuesday on June 19, 2008 - 2:37pm.
Marc Anthony looks like an evil villain stealing a baby."
HA, that's the first thing i thought of when i saw this pic! This could easily be a scene out of a movie about cult members who steal babies to use in human sacrifices.
I swear i'm not really that depraved, these two just bring it out in me :)
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"F*ck you Tyra Banks, Oprah, Magic Johnson, Tiger Woods, Rockefeller. F*ck you." - La Pequena Hillary Clinton, 6/17/08
Oh fuck. Those kids are going to be the most anal tight-assed bandaid lovers there ever were.
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To Wong Foo - Thanks for everything.
Love Carrottopelina.
To think I went to the same grammer school as this self-absorbed women.
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http://fuzzygalore.buzznet.com
Submitted by Migraineuse: "Chaps are assless by definition. If they weren't, they'd be PANTS."
Wonder how much you have to pay someone to lie like that?
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It's like judging ducks before they become swans...its stupid. -HA
...JLo's crying because her babies are the only ones who won't kiss her ass and tell her she's perfect...
...go babies!!!....
Marc Anthony looks like an evil villain stealing a baby.
■I'll tell you what he said...he asked me to forcibly insert the lifeline exercise card into my anus!-Donnie Darko
■Submitted by britscomingback: YOU CAN'T STOP HER BOOT CLAP WITH A BUTT SLAP!
she planted this herself to stay in the attention hore spotlight.
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Cause your mouth's writing checks that your ass can't cash.
This actually makes sense to me because who but JLO would focus more on HERSELF than caring for her kids. Seriously, the kid cies normal people pick it up for a cuddle, JLO instantly thinks it has something to do with HER! Maybe baby is hungry, shat itself, just irritated? Nope, has to be JLO. In her defence, chances are it is...
...Dayanara Torres is probably laughing her ass off in her mansion somewhere...
JLo cries? Not human tears surley? IF she did cry (yeah right) her tears would be diamond incrusted.
~*~I will be
Strong on my own
I will see through the rain
I will find my way
I will keep on
Traveling down the road
Till I finally reach my dream
Till I’m living, and I’m breathing
My destiny, yeah yeah ~ CA, I Will Be~*~
I believe it. She seems to be a control freak. She is not a good mom cause she refuses to get outside help. It is so clearly obvious that she needs some. Her neuroses are already affecting her children, can you imagine in the future. Poor kids, money isn't everything when you're dealing with what appears to be a whack-job mother. Not to mention, that if she keeps carrying on in her obsessed manner, she is going to lose her man.
Valium and Champagne eliminates anxiety.
Maybe she can get some diamond-encrusted Prozac for her postpartum depression, which is compounded by the fact that she has two babies PLUS a fucking whiney-ass, demanding, domineering, cheating, misogynistic, ratfaced, Skeletor-looking husband who's in love with the sound of his own voice. Hell, Skeletor alone would be enough to make me burst into tears.
Not sure if she is a 'shit' mom, but she sue makes 'shit' music...i got june 25th on the amy whinehouse death pool!! YEHHHHHHHHHHHH
Of course she's a shit mom.
It's just one more arrow in her quiver of shittiness along with being a shit-singer, shit-actress, shit-designer, shit-perfumer, shit-wife, shit-friend, and shit-employer.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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my tips on celebrity baby raising:
1 hire nannies. try to pick the same people your celebrity friends used. limit selection to friends whose kids aren't in the loony bin, jail or cemetery.
2 have someone install nanny cam so you can watch what happens in the nursery when you have an interview coming up and need authentic sounding stories
3 get photographed with babies have stylist and public relations firm decide the best time and setting that fits with your schedule
4 get pills from doctor for you, of course
5 if you must take other measures have husband or some other flunky obtain these items.
6 mention in the interview about the super pure and nutritional diet you're on...for breastfeeding (it is not necessary to actually do this) and to lose the baby weight (schedule an appointment)
LOL a thousand times!
Why doesn't she just have a golden, diamond encrusted replica made of herself.
Then she'll know she's a good mommy because she spent zillions of dollars on something they don't need, and she will sort of be there with them, without actually having to be there and hear them cry.
Problem solved.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOv-2HzNPaA
Por favor, mantenerse al lado de las puertas.
They would probably stop crying so much if she would feed them something besides Gerber Picante Salsa.
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My life is nothing but a convoluted drinking game.
ps, Happy Birthday to a certain someone....who may or may not be Michael K.
Oh BULLSHIT.
If anything, it would be the opposite...like J.Lo thinks she does ANYTHING "wrong"? Give me a break!
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“Fuck Soulja Boy! Eat a dick! This ni–a single handedly killed Hip Hop. That shit is such garbage man.”
- Ice T on the sad state of rap music
"The babies are crying! It must be because....THEY DON'T LIKE ME!!!"
Like those twins have even seen their mother much since they exited the womb! I am so glad Skeletor is the voice of reason and insisting she take time off for a massage and rest. He is the one that needs rest, he already looks like he is in an eternal rest.
Boo fucking hoo. It was your decision to pop out a kid.
oh god, what a unbelieveably idiotic twat this one is
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