Wednesday, July 9th 2008

David Lee Roth Almost Died!

Last month, David Lee Roth was speeding in Ontario, Canada when he was pulled over by the coppers. At first the cops didn't recognize the "silk scarf wearing" driver as the one and only Lee Roth, but they did notice that he was having some kind of medical emergency. You see, he was having a major allergic reaction to nuts! That shit is really no joke, but if I was allergic to nuts, my social life would be O-V-E-R.

I'm allergic to shit like skrimps and melon, but being allergic to nuts is a whole different game. I knew this bitch that would break out into hives the size of Wonky McValtrex's clit warts from even a little bit of nut dust touching her skin (off topic: I'm going to name my first perfumed powder line "Nut Dust").

Luckily, the cops got his ass to the local hospital and all was ok in the world again. What in the world would we do without DLR? Let's celebrate his recovery with one of my favorite videos of all-time:



Source



cadysmith75's picture

Someone mentioned that you met your woman on the famous celebrities/rich men seeking beautiful women site SugarbabyMeet.c Qm? True or not?? ...

shandi's picture

I love that song. Well, I love DAVE'S version of that song. And I love that video, too. He looked like he was just having so much fun. Thanks for posting it, MK. Oh, the memories.

Manbearpig's picture

I LOVE DAVE! He was my first real rock concert as a teen. It was hot shit!

roxie's picture

I prefer The Beach Boys version of that song

Aunt Bea's picture

If dumbass was that allergic to nuts and having a severe reaction

a. he wouldn't have been able to drive
b. had an EPI pen on hand
c. taken a hit of Benadryl

Just another dumbass celeb trying to get out of a ticket

2Di4's picture

i knew a girl whose grandma forced her to go out on a blind date with richie sambora (we were all like 18 at the time). his grandma wanted him to meet a "nice girl". this girl may have looked like a geek, but she was a full-on slut. neither of them were interested in each other and bailed after the movie was over. lol. dummy.

letinstar's picture

dave is lucky the mounties didn't taser his ass...i don't think the allergic reaction to nuts is on the cop guide of how to beat a ticket...
_____________________________________________
be honest...is my wig on straight?

chowgirl69's picture

OMG, how I used to cream my little teen-age panties over this man! Not aging so well...SIGH...oh well.

Clarisse's picture

GodDamn I loved me some Diamond Dave back in the day!! He did not age well....although, now that i think about it, i loved Sambora and look at him now!

Well, i'll always have Nikki!

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"if I was allergic to nuts, my social life would be O-V-E-R." -M.K.

horncusker's picture

"Give me a bottle of anything... and a glazed donut... TO GO!"

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I will have a life please, with cheese

Conway Twitty's picture

Allergic to nuts!!! I dont know what id do without nuts! The stubble is good for my skin when he rubs it all over my face and there is no better protein conditioner than the one they produce!

Allergic to nuts. HA!

=+=+=+=+=+=+
inside and out baby......inside and out!

angel_i's picture

Waddyamean "almost"? You mean he's not dead in that picture?

♥ ThreadKilla! Madge's new Vadge and Hot Pregnant Dude 2.0
Lean Like a Chola

2Di4's picture

Aside from the fact that is starting to look like a cross between Neil Young and an old Coach suitcase, he's one smart old STD-bag for getting out of a ticket so creatively.

Cubic Zirconia Dave basically pulled a variation of "The Tommy Boy":

"BEES! KILLER BEES! SAVE YOURSELVES!!"

O lord please help him!
www.theceelist.com

christine the hoff's picture

LCT
you always ask the tough questions. I suppose toilet times are somewhat better than no breathing times, but goddamn, who wants to choose?
ugh, either way.
and If I walk in a pub or what have you and smell shellfish, I have to leave. cannot do it.
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"In the unlikely event of a sudden change in cabin pressure.."
ROOF FLIES OFF!

RIP George Carlin

BRADIFUL BITCH's picture

He's a such a lunatic!
I ♥ the Van Halen with Diamond Dave leading the acrobatic, spandex, arena Rock.

The eternal good time gigolo.

?&!
"Don't get me twisted with average fan losers you have encountered. I am not one of them."
"I am more of a manipulative bitch than a cunt"
"LOVE ANGELINA aka HEART ANGELINA aka ???"

Winnyfranfran's picture

I like Just A Gigolo better. My brother and I used to watch MTV with the sound down and just laugh and laugh. That video was our favorite.

one square's picture

off topic: at first glance, i thought this was an article on sam neil.

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i am courtney love's original face.

girl_cheese's picture

I don't even wanna know what a skrimp is. Anyone remember when David Lee was the hotness? Seriously hot. Damn. If he's getting old then that means ... oh, shit ....

de Cosmos's picture

Rubbish!

The "medical emergency" wasn't due to the nuts per se -- It was all because of the teabag.

Sheryl Crone's picture

A comment and question:

Comment: some people age badly.

Question: Did Roth ever come out of the closet? Watching him sing is like watching Danny Pintauro act.

DeeDee's picture

You're allergic to melons MK? No wonder you have a chichi fascination!

☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺

ricki lake's picture

Submitted by . on July 9, 2008 - 12:00pm.

That's interesting, I did not know that. I had some minor allergies when I was little (grass, dogs) but they don't bother me now - I think that's probably somethign different though. Also, an Epi-Pen is the allergic person's best friend! Not sure if my friend had one or not but she probably did.

parissucksliterally's picture

ricki lake, that is a horrible story! What a bitch!

Sheeps, I just flirt when I get pulled over....or I cry. One or the other usually works.

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“the more I want you, the less I get....ain't that just the way things are...."
- Annie Lennox "Cold"

.'s picture

Submitted by ricki lake on July 9, 2008 - 12:52pm.

ricki lake, if you catch an food allergy soon enough and omit the allergin from the child's diet, the child can actually outgrow the food related allergy. My daughter was deathly allergic to peanuts [Anaphylaxis], and because I caught it when she was young (9 months old) I was able to keep it out of her diet. Now? She can eat all the peanuts she wants. She LOVES them. lol

Anyway, blah-blah, two bitches one fugly soul sucking face.

Sheeps's picture

I have no idea what really happened, but a lot of speeders use "medical emergency" in a vain effort to get out of tickets. I once tried to convince a cop I needed an emergency hysterectomy.

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Why not have a delicious lolly (and $100)?

madam s.'s picture

I guess nut allergies are no joke. Aren't nut allergies why airlines give out little pretzels instead of nuts now? Because people with these allergies REALLY can't even come into contact in any way with them. That was my understanding anyway.

I guess people with nut allergies probably won't be able to wear "Nut Dust" By Michael K.

DebFrmHell's picture

When you go to a restaurant, they are supposed to have an Allergens list of foods that contain peanut, peanut oil, etc. that they keep on hand for customers. Ask the manager for it as servers would probably not know what you are talking about.

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When life hands you lemons, you have one big effing basket of lemons.

LOVE CARROTTOP's picture

I'm not going to lie; I'm pissed off at nut allergies because now I can't eat beloved salty nuts on planes or have peanut butter in an open area. Fuckers.

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"I'm allowed to complain that my fucking butt hurts every now and then." - Lolo

NovaNightly's picture

Submitted by madam s. on July 9, 2008 - 9:44am.

He may be allergic to the nuts, but he is not allergic to the ganja.

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Ooooh...if i was allergic to the ganja...MY life would be O-V-E-R!!!! ;D

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Support Bacteria - They're the only culture some people have. - Steven Wright

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

Submitted by Otter Pop on July 9, 2008 - 11:55am.
Thankfully, I'm only allergic to hairy nuts.

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Same here. But thankfully, my bf shaved recently!

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In heaven, everything is fine. You've got your good things, and I've got mine.

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

Submitted by gina latina on July 9, 2008 - 11:50am.
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on July 9, 2008 - 9:42am.
Ok, so what happens when you have an allergic reaction to something?
_________

I think when you react to nuts, your face swells up, your air ways swell shut and you can't breathe and you die. Or so I've heard.

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I'm slightly allergic to pecans. My throat closes up if I eat them.

*******************************************************
In heaven, everything is fine. You've got your good things, and I've got mine.

Otter Pop's picture

Thankfully, I'm only allergic to hairy nuts.

LOVE CARROTTOP's picture

Submitted by christine the hoff on July 9, 2008 - 12:48pm.
carrottop
depends
some people cannot breathe and have their airways close.
I personally vomit and to the shitty times until I am so empty I have to hydrdate by IV.
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Ooo shitty times. I like having direar. It's so relaxing. Would you prefer having bumps and itchiness and no breathing over vomit and direar times?

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"I'm allowed to complain that my fucking butt hurts every now and then." - Lolo

ricki lake's picture

OMG! Don't even mention nut allergies to me! My friend is deathly allergic to peanuts and was at a dinner party one time (someone I don't know). The host knew of her allergy but didn't "believe" her and thought it was all in her head - so she put peanuts in the food without telling her to "prove" it was all imaginary! Unfortunately, it wasn't, and she almost died. She was in the hospital for weeks recovering. The cunt host did not visit her, send her flowers, or apologize - and my friend is still friends with her! WTF?!

FYI, bitches - nut allergies are some of the most severe allergies one can have, and they're no joke! Some people can't even be in the same room as nuts! Crazy but true.

DebFrmHell's picture

You better call me a doctor.
Feelin' no pain.
Overloaded, down the drain.
Somebody get me a doctor.
You better call up the ambulance, I'm deep in shock.
Overloaded, baby, I can hardly walk.
Somebody get me a doctor.
Somebody get me a doctor.
Feelin' over fine.
And I'm speedin' down that line.
Somebody get me a shot.
(Van Halen)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When life hands you lemons, you have one big effing basket of lemons.

gina latina's picture

Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on July 9, 2008 - 9:42am.
Ok, so what happens when you have an allergic reaction to something?
_________

I think when you react to nuts, your face swells up, your air ways swell shut and you can't breathe and you die. Or so I've heard.

I guess people with really bad peanut allergies can't even be in the same room with peanuts.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~
Having no morals means you have more fun.
-MK 5/29/08

NovaNightly's picture

"I'm allergic to shit like skrimps and melon.."

HA!! Skrimps!!! I TOTALLY say that too...

although i think you're probably MORE allergic to fish tacos and melons... bwahahahahaha :P

****++++****++++****++++****++++****
Support Bacteria - They're the only culture some people have. - Steven Wright

christine the hoff's picture

madame!
xoxoxoxox

carrottop
depends
some people cannot breathe and have their airways close.
I personally vomit and to the shitty times until I am so empty I have to hydrdate by IV.
good times, good times!
----------------------------------------------

"In the unlikely event of a sudden change in cabin pressure.."
ROOF FLIES OFF!

RIP George Carlin

.'s picture

*ALMOST*, MK? You tease.

I was hoping he went ahead and *JUMPED*

Yeah. Lame. Whatever.

madam s.'s picture

christine the hoff,

He must have an apartment there or something, because he was there a lot. And had a little arrest problem. He may be allergic to the nuts, but he is not allergic to the ganja.

And HEY! to you. xoxo

christine the hoff's picture

madame.s
that's cute!
maybe he was recording in NY?
----------------------------------------------

"In the unlikely event of a sudden change in cabin pressure.."
ROOF FLIES OFF!

RIP George Carlin

LOVE CARROTTOP's picture

Ok, so what happens when you have an allergic reaction to something?

----------------------
"I'm allowed to complain that my fucking butt hurts every now and then." - Lolo

gina latina's picture

*sigh*

I miss 80's MTV.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~
Having no morals means you have more fun.
-MK 5/29/08

madam s.'s picture

Awww... glad he's okay. He always would come into the club where I used to work and hang out. He was the oldest guy in the joint and although there was a dress code for everyone else he'd come in in jean overalls with no shirt on underneath. I have tons of funny stories about him, including being at a party one morning at some god-awful hour where everyone was starting to be sick as hell and wanting to die and he perkily busted into "Just a Gigolo".

Come to think of it I'm not really sure why he was always in NY, since I thought he was a California guy?

LOVE CARROTTOP's picture

Submitted by MargeAggedon on July 9, 2008 - 12:33pm.

Because you're david lee roth... so obviously you're alone. HA! :D
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Oooooo burrrrrrrrrn!! Nice one.

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"I'm allowed to complain that my fucking butt hurts every now and then." - Lolo

christine the hoff's picture

he's actually aging rather well!
on topic, food allergies are no joke, I end up in the hospital on an IV if I eat so much as a tablespoon of choopped shrimp ( was in an eggroll and I didn't know it.)
----------------------------------------------

"In the unlikely event of a sudden change in cabin pressure.."
ROOF FLIES OFF!

RIP George Carlin

parissucksliterally's picture

very scary.....glad he is ok...

wow, I just said something nice!

**************************************************
“the more I want you, the less I get....ain't that just the way things are...."
- Annie Lennox "Cold"

Jessucka77's picture

Nooooooooooooooooooooooo . . . crisis narrowly averted! Thank gawd. I luves this man.

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