Dust Off Your Brangelina Shrine....
The golden chosen twins are coming this Tuesday! Shit, instead of dusting off your Brangelina shrine, you should clean out your bomb shelter. I'm sure the presence of the twin messiahs will knock out electrical, gas and water lines. You better stock up on bottled water for your Kool-Aid.
According to InTouch (via DM), Angie Jo has scheduled her c-section for this Tuesday. A source said that when Angie first arrived at the hospital in Nice, France, she all nice and shit, but now she's turning into a real cunt. The source said, "She's starting to feel that the staff are starstruck and not attentive enough. She's throwing fits if she rings and they don't come quick enough."
Angie has also demanded the hospital serve her royal ass salmon even though it's not on the hospital menu. "I think she's in meltdown mode. She's been getting upset if there's not enough ice in her glass," said the source.
Those nurses better watch it. It only takes one phone call from Saint Angelina for them to spend the rest of eternity in hell. Seriously, I think God and Buddha are both in her T-Mobile Fave 5.
In other chosen ones news, a radio station in Canada is offering Brangelina $1 million cash if they name their messiahs Mauler and Rush. Mauler and Rush are the name of two DJs on HOT 89-9 in Ottawa, Canada. Actually, those are fucking perfect names, but this shit is never going to happen. Saint Angelina queefs out $1 million in cash. That ain't nothing to her.
Thanks Mari & Cam
ShareThis
WTF? Sorry about that....
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"Self-promotion, for me, is like going to the dentist" —Daniel Craig
hmmm looks like I'll have to hit Costo to stock up on supplies and head to the mountains this weekend to avoid the A2K....
I hope and pray someone is taping her little rants at the staff. NOTHING is worse than some self important cunt (loathe this word, but in this situation, it works)who thinks that trained medical professionals (or anyone else for that matter) are her fucking slaves. I want to punch people who are rude to waitstaff or salesclerks.
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"Self-promotion, for me, is like going to the dentist" —Daniel Craig
hmmm looks like I'll have to hit Costo to stock up on supplies and head to the mountains this weekend to avoid the A2K....
I hope and pray someone is taping her little rants at the staff. NOTHING is worse than some self important cunt (loathe this word, but in this situation, it works)who thinks that trained medical professionals (or anyone else for that matter) are her fucking slaves. I want to punch people who are rude to waitstaff or salesclerks.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
"Self-promotion, for me, is like going to the dentist" —Daniel Craig
hmmm looks like I'll have to hit Costo to stock up on supplies and head to the mountains this weekend to avoid the A2K....
I hope and pray someone is taping her little rants at the staff. NOTHING is worse than some self important cunt (loathe this word, but in this situation, it works)who thinks that trained medical professionals (or anyone else for that matter) are her fucking slaves. I want to punch people who are rude to waitstaff or salesclerks.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
"Self-promotion, for me, is like going to the dentist" —Daniel Craig
hmmm looks like I'll have to hit Costo to stock up on supplies and head to the mountains this weekend to avoid the A2K....
I hope and pray someone is taping her little rants at the staff. NOTHING is worse than some self important cunt (loathe this word, but in this situation, it works)who thinks that trained medical professionals (or anyone else for that matter) are her fucking slaves. I want to punch people who are rude to waitstaff or salesclerks.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
"Self-promotion, for me, is like going to the dentist" —Daniel Craig
Those nurses better watch it. It only takes one phone call from Saint Angelina for them to spend the rest of eternity in hell. Seriously, I think God and Buddha are both in her T-Mobile Fave 5.
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I'd say she's got Lucifer and that chick from "the ring" in her speed dial MK. And I don't think she has a T-Mobile. She strikes me as a AT&T kinda gal...
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Let me dirty up your mind.
I have heard from some random study that when a couple has a hard time conceiving, adopting can put the stress of conceiving out of their minds, and they end up getting pregnant. Happened to my friends parents.
What scares me about IVF treatment is what I have heard fellow dlisters say- that you can choose the sex, how many, etc.
OT:
Do you guys know the name that Just Jared posters have for Angelina and her clan?
BAMPZS+2
Brad, Angelina, Maddox, Pax, Zahara, Shiloh and the twins!
VOMIT!!
"To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems!"-
I buy my daughter new stuff,(From time of birth to now) and then donate it to mothers in need, without asking for a public thankyou or cash. So far this is maybe 10,000 dollars, maybe more, worth of shit. Some of it she never even touched. I also give to an African baby center monthly, to a catholic center in los Angeles, and to Native American kids in the Dakotas. And YET the little guy like me has to constantly here from people like Angelina and her worshipers that Americans are greedy. And her deeds are God like. Give me a break.
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vibe*
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MK is a comedic god next to stupid Perez. Why isn't MK catapulted to fame? There's so much I don't understand. Let's start a movement!
*sigh* I can't say one bad thing about Brad... I have a soft spot for him... he has eyes and a smile just like the guy I love... THAT is the sole reason, well, that whole really good guy helps out too.
How the hell did Angie seduce him??
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MK is a comedic god next to stupid Perez. Why isn't MK catapulted to fame? There's so much I don't understand. Let's start a movement!
Evil Shoe ~ thanks!
We should take up a DListed Collection for M.K. to travel to the Holy Land of France so he can give us a second-by-second update on the pending arrival of the Holy Trinity: Angelina & the Omen Twins.
Submitted by Stoney on July 9, 2008 - 5:20pm.
I heard some studies show fertility drugs taken by the mother can possibly fuck up the fertility of the child.
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Didn't you get the memo? 99% of parents who take fertility drugs don't give a shit about their babies, they're just selfish and want to have one, even if they're barren or 60 years old. The child is just an accessory, or an excuse to play the "I'm fertile and amazing!" card.
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"I'm allowed to complain that my fucking butt hurts every now and then." - Lolo
Brad is working with KIEHL'S to make a new bio-degradable body cleanser later this year. 100% of the proceeds go to Katrina victims. Loves it!
Stoney on July 9, 2008 - 2:20pm.
I heard some studies show fertility drugs taken by the mother can possibly fuck up the fertility of the child
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I read this too somewhere. But everytime I bring up random studies, people like to get on me about how dumb they are. Anyways I really believe science and Doctors don't really know the full ramifications of alot of the shit they are doing these days.
Sorry Ang, I plan on eating two footlong subs on Monday night thus sentencing me to an entire day of shitting on Tuesday. Sorry I won't be there to not give a shit on your special day
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"I'm allowed to complain that my fucking butt hurts every now and then." - Lolo
Submitted by Countess Olenska on July 9, 2008 - 5:22pm.
Oh shut the fuck up! I like Angelina Jolie, but I find it concerning how she's idolized. She is NOT the most beautiful woman I've seen. Her forehead is freakishly large, her nose is one operation from looking Latoya pinched, her lips are pretty, her tits nice, but it's fucking horrible to hail a woman with arms and legs like those the epitome of beauty - teenage girls have more meat on them - what the fuck are they supposed to think?
'Oh ok, if I have to match the ideal of beauty I must starve myself untill my legs and arms look zombiesh too!'
for fuck's sake!
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Thank fucking God. I was about to snap. I HATE THIS TWAT.
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"I'm allowed to complain that my fucking butt hurts every now and then." - Lolo
Had to edit your post Shonathan...
Submitted by ☆ Shonathan Hilton ☆ on July 9, 2008 - 10:09pm.
Look at that man.
Hhe is so gross.
If she were infront of my vag,
I would so totally eat her out, yummy!.
Hhe is just this really averge man, that's manged to trick people into think he's someone special
~♥~cause every moment we share together
is even better than the moment before
if every day was as good as today was
then i cant wait until tomorrow comes~Westlife~♥
Angie Jo is displeased. She's psychically messin with Dlisted mojo!
Run, Run for your lives............
TwoDrink,
Keep smilin babe!
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"if I was allergic to nuts, my social life would be O-V-E-R." -M.K.
Where is she planning on dropping these brats?
I hope that she does not choose Cali. We are having enough problems without her.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Submitted by ☆ Shonathan Hilton ☆ on July 9, 2008 - 5:08pm.
Look at that woman.
She is so gorgeous.
If she were infront of my eyes,
I would so totally get on my knee for her lol.
She is just this Godess
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Oh shut the fuck up! I like Angelina Jolie, but I find it concerning how she's idolized. She is NOT the most beautiful woman I've seen. Her forehead is freakishly large, her nose is one operation from looking Latoya pinched, her lips are pretty, her tits nice, but it's fucking horrible to hail a woman with arms and legs like those the epitome of beauty - teenage girls have more meat on them - what the fuck are they supposed to think?
'Oh ok, if I have to match the ideal of beauty I must starve myself untill my legs and arms look zombiesh too!'
for fuck's sake!
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MK is a comedic god next to stupid Perez. Why isn't MK catapulted to fame? There's so much I don't understand. Let's start a movement!
Priss...I actually feel for the kids. Mia she is not, no matter how hard she tries.
Priss...I actually feel for the kids. Mia she is not, no matter how hard she tries.
Priss...I actually feel for the kids. Mia she is not, no matter how hard she tries.
Submitted by ☆ Shonathan Hilton ☆ on July 9, 2008 - 5:08pm.
Look at that woman.
She is so gorgeous.
If she were infront of my eyes,
I would so totally get on my knee for her lol.
She is just this Godess
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Oh shut the fuck up! I like Angelina Jolie, but I find it concerning how she's idolized. She is NOT the most beautiful woman I've seen. Her forehead is freakishly large, her nose is one operation from looking Latoya pinched, her lips are pretty, her tits nice, but it's fucking horrible to hail a woman with arms and legs like those the epitome of beauty - teenage girls have more meat on them - what the fuck are they supposed to think?
'Oh ok, if I have to match the ideal of beauty I must starve myself untill my legs and arms look zombiesh too!'
for fuck's sake!
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MK is a comedic god next to stupid Perez. Why isn't MK catapulted to fame? There's so much I don't understand. Let's start a movement!
Submitted by Stock Broker on July 9, 2008 - 5:15pm.
Yea, I was having problems all day with my internet provider.
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Its probably not related but I'll post it anyway just in case it helps a whore here. My internet wouldn't work today, called my ISP. They asked if I had Zone Alarm, if I did I need to disable it because Zone Alarms latest update is totally fucked up and won't let you get online. I saw it in the news too. I disabled it, then the internet fired up.
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Dick happens! - MK
I heard some studies show fertility drugs taken by the mother can possibly fuck up the fertility of the child.
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It's like judging ducks before they become swans...its stupid. -HA
And I am not having a beer. Get over it. IVF.
My cous had it and I know what happens. Bed rest at 3rd tri sometimes 2nd. Then early delivery.
I can't stand this bitch!
I loved the South Park where she had major cities of lice in her crotch....MAWHAHAHAHAH
Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun.
-Ash
Two Drink
Ain't that a bitch!!
lol
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I say we get dangerous
itself
*blink*
*gulp*
Save yourselves!
Submitted by ☆ Shonathan Hilton ☆ on July 9, 2008 - 5:09pm.
cringe worthy to say the least
Clarisse - you make me smile, a feat in it's self.
To quote a fellow DLister, "Squat and Pop Already Bitch".
That sums it up for me.
Yea, I was having problems all day with my internet provider. It was caused by the pending arrival of the Holy Twins and Angelina breaking the sound barrier with her screams to Brad Pitt.
"I am a very special woman. I do great deeds even though I don't have to. You have no idea how easy doing nothing would be for me. My childhood was hard and I know how it feels to be without love. Most people are star struck when they meet me, due to the fact that I may be the most important celebrity do gooder on the planet. Maybe even the biggest in the universe."
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LOL @ Submitted by EvilShoe on July 9, 2008 - 2:09pm.
Will there be siren alerts to warn us to take cover when they come?
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Yes. There will be sirens and stuff in the U.S. and France. You will be required to hide under your desk for the duration of the bomb. You do have potassium iodide tablets in your Go Bag, don't you?
I'm callin it --- The Arrival of the Anti-Christs! 666 will be a birthmark on their heads.
She's having a C Section probably cause the baby is not due yet. Very typ in IVF. Oh I know loons, she didn't have that...right.
Submitted by ☆ Shonathan Hilton ☆ on July 9, 2008 - 4:09pm.
Ok sweetie, it was bad enough the first time. No need to repeat it.
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It's like judging ducks before they become swans...its stupid. -HA
Oh Lawdy Mizz Angie, I'z sorreh! I'z git here fassuh next time, ma'am! I'z jus a poe frenchie nurse maid!! I'z sorreh!!!
Cunt.
*edit. PS i hate the C word, but it fits.
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"if I was allergic to nuts, my social life would be O-V-E-R." -M.K.
Scratchy Pitt.
Bwhaahahahahahaha! Mike, that's awesome!
Two Drink,
It's like Roger from American Dad...he shit's jewel encrusted gold.
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"if I was allergic to nuts, my social life would be O-V-E-R." -M.K.
Look at that woman.
She is so gorgeous.
If she were in front of my eyes
I'd slap a bitch lol.
She is just so annoying.
♥ ThreadKilla! Madge's new Vadge and Hot Pregnant Dude 2.0
Lean Like a Chola
Priss - when they shit it comes out golden and more than you life and mine combined. We'd only be so lucky to be their pampers.
WHO GIVES A FUCK, THEY AREN'T MY KIDS!!!!!!!!!1
Why is she having a c-section?
I'm still hoping for Itchy & Scratchy Pitt.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on July 9, 2008 - 5:09pm.
I had D-Listed withdrawal and was getting some crazy error message and the site wouldn't load ...did anyone else have this problem?
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Thats the first sign that the chosen ones are on their way!
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Dick happens! - MK
I doubt they're star struck. Maybe they were for a little while. But that wore off, and now they're just annoyed.
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I say we get dangerous
Oh God enough already!!! It isn't a miracle of science to get a bitch knocked up. I am sorry to those who try hard, but really...I have had ENOUGH
Why isn't fantastic when any woman gives birth???
Should I feel less holy if I get knocked up???
Will there be siren alerts to warn us to take cover when they come?
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Dick happens! - MK
I underestimated how big the birth of the chosen ones is...I just can't comprehend so much idolatry towards any mortal...
They are mortal, right?
Do they poop? Do they, James Haven? Do they have toilets and stuff?
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I say we get dangerous
didnt someone call it for bastille day in the other thread?
-=meow hiss purr=-