Angels Are Singing! The Chosen Ones Have Arrived!
I'm sure you already heard the news due to the fact that millions are rioting in the streets, thousands of people are shouting from mountain tops and your pet has probably taken shelter underneath your bed. Lock your doors, turn off your electricity and horde your water, because the second coming of Jesus is here (aka Saint Angelina gave birth to the twin messiahs). I know, don't you just want to burst into tears and bathe in holy water?
The chosen ones arrived on our planet yesterday in France. They can already talk, read, write and sing. Their SAT scores are already higher than yours and I'm sure they've already been shortlisted for an Oscar this year. A Nobel Peace Prize too.
Saint Angelina gave birth to a boy, Knox Leon, and a girl, Vivienne Marcheline. Knox was the middle name of Brad's pepaw. Marcheline was Angelina's mother's name.
Vivi weighed in at 5lbs and Knox weighed in at 5.03. Knox needs to go on the zone diet stat! Things in the Brangelina household are now even. 3 boys, 3 girls.
3 boys named Maddox, Pax and Knox. Those three should start a boy band and call themselves Triple X.
Saint Angelina's doctor told the Associated Press (via People) that the chosen ones were delivered via c-section. He said, "The babies are doing well. The operation went just perfectly. Angelina is in very good spirits. Brad Pitt was at her side. He was there and all was well."
Brangie's lawyers also wasted no time in buying up every single domain name for their chosen ones. They purchased everything from knoxleonjoliepitt.com to viviennemarchelinejoliepitt.biz. They covered all their bases.
There's good news though! Brangelinaisridiculous.com is still available!
So that's that! You now must immediately shut down your computer and spend the day praying at your Brangelina shrine, begging for forgiveness for all the sins you've committed. Or you can just spend the day drinking until your eyeballs roll back into your head. Either one works.
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Submitted by islandgirl on July 13, 2008 - 6:16pm.
Submitted by Sheeps on July 13, 2008 - 6:10pm.
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You were fighting with the wife? Well, Bhí mé ag ól uisce Guinness.
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Come on. Is this not a language invented by a crew of men just chock full of Guinness? I must admit, tho: It's pretty cool they wrote it down while they were at it...;p
♥ ThreadKilla!
Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on July 13, 2008 - 3:22pm.
I think I can put it on Photobucket but under Adult or Squeamish or something. It's a classic.
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
Submitted by Sheeps on July 13, 2008 - 6:20pm.
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That it's forked?
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Póg ma thoin.
Sheeps, I bookmarked the page, but I haven't figured out how to put it on myspace.....it won't let me link it....and I don't have Photobucket, and it doesn't sound like you are able to either. hmmmmmm.
that pic is sickening!
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"I won’t hold my breath either: they don’t know how to have intelligent conversations. These are loonies from the awfully racist website Dlisted who come here to start trouble..."
-poster on JJ
Submitted by islandgirl on July 13, 2008 - 3:16pm.
Past tense, too? Say, it's true what they say about your tongue.
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
Submitted by lizzieb on July 13, 2008 - 5:54pm.
My paternal Gran is from County Cork. Sláinte!
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Sorry, Sluts. I didn't read all the comments. Who could? 500 plus! Too much. However, Sláinte back to our hot Irish sluts!
Submitted by angel_i on July 13, 2008 - 3:12pm.
Ok, really for real - I'm 5'4". But I don't think I'm a troll, no...look....
Que linda! That ain't no 5'4".
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
Submitted by Sheeps on July 13, 2008 - 6:10pm.
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You were fighting with the wife? Well, Bhí mé ag ól uisce Guinness.
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Póg ma thoin.
Sorry about spelling and wording, hands aren't behaving today. (Am I cursed by the golden ones already?
The "Rosemary's Baby" twins have finally arrived.
I can finally cash in on that pact with Satan. Bitch owes me a couple of bucks.
Also, I just read that a sheep over at Just Jared quote,"lives for Brad and Angelina." I mean, sweet Christ on a pony!
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A little guilt goes a long way
Does the Mayor sign everyone's birth certificate? Is the pope and bush coming to sign it? This is almost as weird when Suri was born.
Ok, really for real - I'm 5'4". But I don't think I'm a troll, no...look....
♥ ThreadKilla!
Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Submitted by angel_i on July 13, 2008 - 3:10pm.
I have a dress that matches you:) Would you like to see it? I got it from Viva.
Maybe. You're not a Troll, are you?
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
I think we should open a book on the next purchases. I am willing to offer evens on one African (to go matchy matchy with, what I hate to confess,is my fav of the bunch) and two Chinese- poss twins- by the end of next year. Any takers?
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Leave the thinking to horses, they've got bigger heads.
IG nips into a little Screech and thinks she's made herself a whole new language. To that I say ag troid leis mo bhean céile.
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
Submitted by Sheeps on July 13, 2008 - 6:07pm.
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I have a dress that matches you:) Would you like to see it? I got it from Viva.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
christine the hoff on July 13, 2008 - 5:34pm
Hooker, I just responded to you at youknowwhere...
?&!
"Don't get me twisted with average fan losers you have encountered. I am not one of them."
"I am more of a manipulative bitch than a cunt"
"LOVE ANGELINA aka HEART ANGELINA aka ???"
Ok, they have the perfect family - 3 gods, 3 goddesses, 3 names with 'X' in them. Now I hope they stop there. Any more adoptions or offspring will be anticlimatic.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on July 13, 2008 - 2:50pm.
God, I uploaded that matador pic to TinyPic and they deleted it! I mean it's like a valid sports/accident story, right? They're a bunch of dumb racists.
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
passing Through @ 07/13/2008 at 5:57 pm
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O. So he IS the Dad then! That’s WAY better:)
(I think he forgot what he was arguing about teehee)
♥ ThreadKilla!
Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
w00t! passingthrough is a WINNER! I was just about to relieve myself of that airbubble all together...
♥ ThreadKilla!
Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Submitted by lelu on July 13, 2008 - 1:52pm.
Veingelina posted it before I could, but that is crazy shit. The fucking mayor and the OB/GYN are out there with paperwork like they just discovered the cure to AIDS(which the messiahs very well may have by now). Don't tell me Brangelina aren't PR whores, they can't stand to not have their names in the papers. They'll parade everyone with even one small piece of knowledge out there all week to taunt the press until they choose to make their debut.
^^^^^^^^^^
Seriously, if the person who discovered the cure to AIDS was in Nice right this minute, he or she would be treated like trash and shoved aside so that the mayor could continue his worship of Brangelina. Trust.
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Dlisted's a hellava drug.
"Paris is fucking lame. She's more offensive to me than anything. She's a total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut. I pray that my daughter will not turn out like her." - Dave Grohl
The starfuckers over at Just Jared are having multiple orgasms because Brad cut the cord. I honestly don't get the hype about these two.
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A little guilt goes a long way
Submitted by lizzieb on July 13, 2008 - 5:54pm.
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My paternal Gran is from County Cork. Sláinte!
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Póg ma thoin.
Submitted by islandgirl on July 13, 2008 - 10:50pm.
Yes!! *hands lizzieb a Guinness* :)
Many thanks, Guinness is mother's milk to me. I cheated though- my Mum is half Irish (grandad from County Cork )and my Dad is from Dublin so I have an ethnic advantage! Not that these racist yanks would understand. No wonder Ange gave birth in la belle France- us Europeans must show the way.
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Leave the thinking to horses, they've got bigger heads.
Veingelina posted it before I could, but that is crazy shit. The fucking mayor and the OB/GYN are out there with paperwork like they just discovered the cure to AIDS(which the messiahs very well may have by now). Don't tell me Brangelina aren't PR whores, they can't stand to not have their names in the papers. They'll parade everyone with even one small piece of knowledge out there all week to taunt the press until they choose to make their debut.
Submitted by radio siren on July 13, 2008 - 5:45pm.
passing Through @ 07/13/2008 at 5:57 pm # 623 angel_i @ 07/13/2008 at 3:34 pm
Jill @ 07/13/2008 at 3:25 pm
And if James Haven is gay, what’s it to you?
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Um…then he can’t be the father, DUH!
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LOL!
What I really wanted is for them to splain Golden Showers...I wonder if there's anyway I can get them to tell me all about assplay and how lesbians do it.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
that's right Sheeps...and the next time you call me a "fucking kike", I'll make you wish your balls looked like that Matador!
hehehe
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"I won’t hold my breath either: they don’t know how to have intelligent conversations. These are loonies from the awfully racist website Dlisted who come here to start trouble..."
-poster on JJ
Submitted by lizzieb on July 13, 2008 - 5:49pm.
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Yes!! *hands lizzieb a Guinness* :)
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Póg ma thoin.
Sheeps and angel_i...
It's iggly oggly. Which as far as I know, is the Queen's English.
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Póg ma thoin.
Submitted by islandgirl on July 13, 2008 - 10:44pm.
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Hahaha!! *see siggie*
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Póg ma thoin
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Kiss my arse?
Leave the thinking to horses, they've got bigger heads.
islandgirl is speaking Island Speak!
That's mindfuck language you know.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
sonia @ 07/13/2008 at 5:27 pm
these negatives remarks make me love this sophicated family that much more, they have contributed to this world like none other before them
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But seriously. Do these people live under rocks?
♥ ThreadKilla!
Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Submitted by islandgirl on July 13, 2008 - 2:44pm.
Well, you can póg ma thoin, too. What language is that anyway--Pig Latin?
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
passing Through @ 07/13/2008 at 5:57 pm # 623 angel_i @ 07/13/2008 at 3:34 pm
Jill @ 07/13/2008 at 3:25 pm
And if James Haven is gay, what’s it to you?
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Um…then he can’t be the father, DUH!
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He’s not gay, but even if he were that doesn’t preclude him from becoming a father. Any man can get a woman pregnant. Fatherhood/Parenthood isn’t about the biological connection. It’s about the spiritual and emotional connection with your children. How sad is it that in this day and age people like yourself still don’t realize that?
Having pointed that out, I’ve got to LMAO at your naivete. Do you not realize how many gay men in the world are biological fathers? Do you live in some kind of dreamland where the sperm of homosexual men ceases functioning because they’re gay? Do you even have any idea of the percentage of homosexual men who are married, in the closet and have fathered children with women? Are you married and have children? If so, let’s all hope your husband doesn’t turn out to be one of those men who are in the closet and married to a woman and seeing a male lover on the side without your knowledge. With your narrow-mindedness, I can see you allowing your self-pity to overrule your children’s needs and you end up slitting your wrists when you everntually find out about his doulbe life or get dumped for his male lover. In other words - grow up and open your eyes!
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BWAHAHAHAHAHHA, wow, are they dense. angel_i's comment went completely over their heads.
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Dlisted's a hellava drug.
"Paris is fucking lame. She's more offensive to me than anything. She's a total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut. I pray that my daughter will not turn out like her." - Dave Grohl
Submitted by Sheeps on July 13, 2008 - 5:42pm.
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Hahaha!! *see siggie*
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Póg ma thoin.
Submitted by islandgirl on July 13, 2008 - 2:40pm.
That's just the kind of post I'd expect from a Newfie.
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
Submitted by boomsy on July 13, 2008 - 4:35pm.
Hey CTH, I was trying to egg you on...(mellymelmel)
Oh, you asked for it. lol.
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"In the unlikely event of a sudden change in cabin pressure.."
ROOF FLIES OFF!
RIP George Carlin
I've had it up to here with being called a Limey. Jellus h8ters.
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Leave the thinking to horses, they've got bigger heads.
Racist? Seriously? That is the biggest no-no on this site. What bullshit.
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Póg ma thoin.
Okay, before I logged off, I refreshed one last time and found this reply to my post:
onmyown @ 07/13/2008 at 5:49 pm Angie queen of the world @ 07/13/2008 at 5:03 pm -But I am confused, I thought Angelina has had more lovers?
At least you’re admitting to your mental disarray. Nope - Jennifer Barren had been in the business of spreading her legs for a long long time. “can’t tell you how many. The real question is not how many in HW has she FCUK, it’s who has she not.
“I drink to your confusion. Sorry for your A-SS, but the devil has already taken you - and you should not wonder why it is causing such heartaches, confusion and troubles. Day by day you’re waiting just to die a painful death.
I shall be counting the days. May the devil be with you.
^^^^^^^^^^^
WOW. And they say Dlisters are h8rs? Holy shit, I have no qualms in calling them loonies now! "May the devil be with you?!" *hides in corner with my rosary, doing some Hail Angies*
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Dlisted's a hellava drug.
"Paris is fucking lame. She's more offensive to me than anything. She's a total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut. I pray that my daughter will not turn out like her." - Dave Grohl
Submitted by parissucksliterally on July 13, 2008 - 5:37pm.
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I guess someone should've informed my black ass about this site being racist.
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"Tact is just not saying true stuff - I'll pass."
PSL recently called me a "dumb mick"--out of nowhere.
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Honey-moon: The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure. (SJ)
OMG, I came here specifically to post about JJ. That site and it's Brangeloonies are fucking insane. As is the Mayor of Nice! Sorry if this was mentioned before, but he held a new conference and showed off the birth certificate. I have never seen such crazy shit in my life. They are babies of two vapid, Hollywood actors, not the second coming of Jesus!
http://justjared.buzznet.com/2008/07/13/brad-pitt-umbilical-cord/comment...
yes lizieb, I had to steal that quote for my siggie!
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"I won’t hold my breath either: they don’t know how to have intelligent conversations. These are loonies from the awfully racist website Dlisted who come here to start trouble..."
-poster on JJ
But no more help from DListed; I'm MK all the way.
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Simplicity provides a fine line between eloquence and plainness. -LL Cool J
Doggie ate his toes again so am off to aunties. have a good nite and try to stay in trouble...
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And I find it kinda funny.
I find it kinda sad.
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had.
Yeah Lyn….it is totally “imazing” that Brad has a biological son.
…….and besane, what the hell does John Mayer have to do with this?
what a bunch of IDIOTS! lmao
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"I won’t hold my breath either: they don’t know how to have intelligent conversations. These are loonies from the awfully racist website Dlisted who come here to start trouble..."
-poster on JJ
Hey CTH, I was trying to egg you on...(mellymelmel)
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Simplicity provides a fine line between eloquence and plainness. -LL Cool J