Um......Okay.....
Mayor Christian Estrosi of Nice, France held a fucking press conference today to show off the birth certificates of the twin messiahs aka Hard Knox and Vivie Jolie-Pitt. The hell?! Is this normal?
I'm surprised his ass didn't come prancing out with Saint Angelina's golden placenta in one hand and the chosen ones' umbilical cords in the other. Yeah, scratch that. They didn't have umbilical cords, because they dropped from the heavens above.
Mayor Christian told reporters, "On behalf of the inhabitants of Nice, I congratulate the happy parents, the most famous couple of the world who have chosen our city for this happy event. I also congratulate the four brothers and sisters of the newborns who are [history won't forget it] real 'Niçois' ('citizens of Nice'). It's a pride to Nice and all its citizens."
Ok, how much did Brangelina pay his ass? I'm waiting for him to announce that they are changing the name of their city from Nice to Brangelinaville.
Not only did the mayor hold a press conference, but so did her doctor. Dr. Michel Sussmann said that Brad was in the room with Saint Angelina. He said, "It was an epidural, so [Angelina] was awake and speaking and laughing. They were happy." Dr. Michel went on to say that Brad even cut their umbilical cords. Okay, so they did have umbilical cords. Expect to see their crystal cords on eBay.
Who the hell is going to give a press conference next? The janitor?
I guess I should also take part in celebrating this totallyamazingspecialwonderfulfantasticholy day. I will celebrate by getting shitbombed for the second time today! Hooray! I wish everyday was Brangelina day!
Submitted by Libra on July 16, 2008 - 3:31am.
Sorry but your view, blinded by your insane love for this whorish couple
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Ummm... I am new here, where is the "laughing out loud" emoticon??
Believe what you want, who gives a sh*t? Certainly not me!
Submitted by Narrator on July 15, 2008 - 4:07pm.
Sorry but your view, blinded by your insane love for this whorish couple doesn't make them legitimate... neither does it effect the general view of the public according to which, they are indeed unfortunately BASTARDS... all three of them!
"if you look up the definition of the word "bastard"... it says illegitimate children!"
Whatever... This is 2008... and I suppose their father has legally recognized them... In my view they are not illegitimate or bastards.
Hey Dlisters... i read something on perez and thought i'd share it with you guys...
Here's what a loonie said...
MiaAn says –
PICTURES! PICTURES!!!! I want PICTURES!!!!
Angelina Is the most beautiful mother in the whole wide world and Brad Pitt is Gorgeous! I think a WEDDING is in order!
AND NOW... the greatest reply ever....
Mayor says -
Angelina is the most beautiful homewrecker in the whole world and Brad is the hottest horn dog in the world! Yeah baby, lets see some of them pictures!!! oh god, pictures, pictures, pictures!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm a loon and can't stop, everything is going faster just looking at them, yes faster, faster, faster, faster………. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh is hard to type with my fingers so sticky now damnit!
LOLZ... that cracked me up BIG time!
A baby being bastard is when a daddy wont marry the fat whore mommy. I learned that by watching T.V.
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Submitted by Narrator on July 15, 2008 - 2:01pm.
Come on people, don't call the babies bastards... none of this is THEIR fault!
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I dont think the kids are being called bastard in the same tone as calling someone an a$$hole or f*cktard... if you look up the definition of the word "bastard"... it says illegitimate children! So... no denying the fact... just stating what they really are! ILLEGITIMATE !!!
Come on people, don't call the babies bastards... none of this is THEIR fault!
I am inclined to believe this is the mayor's fault... after all he HAD to take the birth certificates with him (the Brangies didn't give them to him) so he can do all the paperwork
Submitted by BRADIFUL BITCH on July 14, 2008 - 11:36pm
Oooh, The Departed. Great flick. And I'm not a Leo fan.
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"Shes like a catroach with nine lives and a disgusting shell"-LoLo on 6/24/08
♥♥ If you don't talk to your Cat about Catnip, who will? ♥♥
new sig test for aesthetic purposes
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
I just saw this on another site:
"Vivienne = live, life, living
Vivienne Marcheline = live Marcheline
What a lovely tribute to Angie’s mother."
If the transaltion is true, I have to admit, it is beautiful.
*chokes self*
*drinks draino*
This media frenzy over the illegitimate twins has reached new heights of craziness!
I dont live in the west but i'd like to know if THIS kinda celebrity ass-kissing is normal there or not?
What is wrong with our world today? Our priorities are surely f*cked up!
Geez... people dying everyday, war, hunger, corruption, terrorism and the birth of some over-hyped celebrity's BASTRD babies is news worthy??? This is NOT right!
And then they call Brad and Angelina humanitarians??? F*ck no... i'm so disgusted by these two lying publicity whores! I wish there was a bigger word than "hate" for these two... there's ought to be!
Ok, so now, Yahoo news has some drawn out article with baby name experts, disecting these bastards names.
WHO THE FUCK CARES!!!!!!!!!!! They are babies, with pretty much almost normal names, women pop twins out every GD day! AGGGGH!!!
If you bitches want the 411 on the Brangie Bunch, you come to James Haven!
Who does this guy think he is? He doesn't even like Americans! He told James Haven "Americans are for zee birds!" James Haven told him a thing or two and reminded him that Mary Kay built an empire on the skincare of America! How dare he?
James Haven may be French (ok, French Canadian, but still) but he LOVES America!
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See James Haven in an Oscar winning performance!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w9cKFiCrSU
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Hugs peaches-
(in regards to earlier post- thanks for clarifying, and no problem. Glad to know you don't dislike us all! lol I don't like all dems either. Don't feel like you have to walk on egg shells for me; I'm just glad you helped me understand where you're coming from. Carry on with the snark!)
Ugh. I was hoping this was all a bad dream. Is it really possible that two separate people felt the need to hold two press conferences about a celebrity's babies? Really?
We need a French dlister so we can be assured that the Mayor is in a very small minority. Gah!!!
"To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems!"-
Submitted by M.E. on July 14, 2008 - 9:47am.
long story short, got promotion, need to train my replacement and then start my own training, hence no time for the D.
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Next step: WORLD DOMINATION.
LOL
Best of luck, kiddo!
-☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Why must I feel like that
Why must I chase the cat
Nothin' but the dog in me
Mrs K ♥
Pimpcessa - long story short, got promotion, need to train my replacement and then start my own training, hence no time for the D.
*sobs uncontrollably*
Submitted by Pimpcessa on July 14, 2008 - 9:33am.
Why, thank you! ♥
-☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Why must I feel like that
Why must I chase the cat
Nothin' but the dog in me
Mrs.Kravitz
Hey, good to see your still here too!! Kind of the voice of reason most of the time with a little smackdown when necessary!! Haha
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I'm your huckleberry!!
M.E.
Oh shit, don't leave now. I came back for today because I figured with the birth of the Messiahs it might be fun again.
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I'm your huckleberry!!
Submitted by M.E. on July 14, 2008 - 9:26am.
I'm gonna be MIA for a while too. So, basically today is my last day to play for a while.
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You will be missed. Your absence will create a stinkin' void here.
*weeping copious amounts*
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Why must I feel like that
Why must I chase the cat
Nothin' but the dog in me
Good for you Pimpcessa!
I'm gonna be MIA for a while too. So, basically today is my last day to play for a while.
*sniff sniff*
Actually I've been working my fine ass off!! Also got tired of people like "LA" whining and screaming. Had to focus on me for a while instead these idiot celebs. Haha
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I'm your huckleberry!!
P I M P C E S S A !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WORD UP HOOKAH! Where the hell have you been hiding your fine ass?
And no. Nothing has changed.
Wow, I bet that big old tat on her stomach is gonna look so sexy now with that baby scar. Life really does throw ya some happiness sometimes.
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I'm your huckleberry!!
M.E.
Hello....remember me darling?? Seems things are still the same here.
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I'm your huckleberry!!
My cousin's baby has been sick. She has gotten better recently, and may be the first infant to ever have a stint put in her her heart, and it seems to have saved her life. I think She should get more news coverge than these fuckin' Star Twins!!!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on July 14, 2008 - 5:58am.
That is just PR whoring and there is no other word for it.
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WORD x infinity, IV!!!! This entire sham is making me sick.
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they both had to sign off on this before Alec Baldwin, mayor of Nice, stood atop mount crumpet with his holy documents.
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Please do not take the name of my boyfriend in vain. Thank you.
-☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Why must I feel like that
Why must I chase the cat
Nothin' but the dog in me
Submitted by LoLo on July 14, 2008 - 10:18am.
You rock LoLo! give me some emails to write to, and I'll write some letters!!!! I'll try and start one of those online petitions, and send it to Brangelina's PR People if I get an overwhelming amount of support. They need to be brought back down to earth! Tom Cruise learned his Lesson, And he and Katie have been on their best behavior for the past 2 yrs. Yet he's still suffering the reprecussions, and rightfully so! It may not be too late for Brangelina, but they better cool it, or they will find that there are a lot more people who are NOT Brangeloonies than are, and there charities will go dry, and so will their bank accounts.
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
How did I miss this piece of gold?
Seriously. Who the fuck does AJ think she is? Press conferences? Really. Does she really think the birth of her twins is earth shattering news, worthy of THREE fucking press conferences?
I have been on the verge of hating her, but this has thrown me over the edge.
Fuck her.
Submitted by Miss Lios on July 14, 2008 - 9:21am.
I live in Europe and I have to say, Nice Mayor's reaction is very strange. Europeans in general tend to hate American celebrities' asses. They especially hate it when someone makes an American the biggest shit on Earth. So, I think this guy is on his way to lose the next elections for making a fool of himself and taking Nice's citizens along for the ride.
This is EXACTLY What I thought!!! I've heard the people of Nice really don't give a SHIT about Brangelina! Johnny Depp must be soooo thrilled to be in Wisconsin right now! I just hope he doesn't disapoint us and start hanging out with Brangelina when he gets back!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
looks like i was right.
st ange is so deluded she probably thinks of herself as marianne (Marianne is present everywhere in France and holds a place of honor in town halls and law courts. She symbolizes the "Triumph of the Republic")
you may have seen a famous painting (http://data2.blog.de/media/960/1273960_2f1d1ffdf3_m.jpeg) in whihc marianne is stylishly topless.
so this holding off until bastille day (today) plays right into her fantasy.
as for that idiot mayor - there is one in every town.
(explanation: re the item more hot shit from the dollar store, i posted this:
Submitted by funsten beewaxer on July 9, 2008 - 1:00pm.
I know this is not related to the dollar store but it is to Brangelina or should one say just her, as he seems no longer to exist except as her accessory.
I have just figured out what is going on.
She is going to hold out (if possible) till JULY 14, BASTILLE DAY, to fire out her twin cannons who will then be not just French citizens but MAGICAL and SAINTLY (as MK has perceived already)
Since she is going to have a caesarean she probably has browbeaten all the doctors and nurses into agreeing to this ludicrous plan...
guess we'll see. and perhaps I will have egg on my face but
Submitted by LoLo on July 14, 2008 - 10:18am
.....Tell them to go get real jobs. Tell them to go cover the war or get some real dirt on these slippery masters of fuckery we call politicians.
The fact that these people won’t go the fuck away out of the spot light should tell you that they are devils who want to ruin the world. They want to keep you distracted while the real shit goes down. Are we not at war all over the world? ........
AMEN!!!!!
I read this site for shits and grins, but to think this is real news, and these actors who think they make the world go 'round....that's just sad.
You are right, I think this mess is just distractions while we are getting fucked over by our government and the people who don't do the job they are SUPPOSED to do and report it....they should be bitch-slapped.
So an actress had twins? Big fucking deal...women have children every day, a good amount in terrible conditions and glaring poverty. THAT should be the fucking news, not this twat.
www.myspace.com/mle62
So the twins were finally cut out! I kinda thought it would be this weekend! Congrats! I thought I felt my core shake yesterday, and I think it was more than gas! It was Angie's stupidly named bastards joining us on Earth! All hail the Saint Mother! Somewhere a Brangeloonie is blowing up those birth certificates and framing them.
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"AND he has a strong pimp hand"
Submitted by joanne on July 14, 2008 - 10:34am.
ha ha ha. Im sorry your in pain right now though, but what you said was hilarious.
Yeah I dont want it to be just internet postings on websites. They need something huge and physical.
1,000,000,000,000 pictures of feces should get this point across!
You want to talk shit about shit instead of reporting news CBS, NBC, BBC? then you will have to LOOK at actual SHIT.
bitches!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
LoLo, All that does is get you banned from posting. In most places I am not allowed to post on, Bush, Jolie/Pitt or anything political, then if they let you post, your post gets buried behind repetitive postings. I used to be banned from the Whitehouse.gov, I only offered to become the first disable person (useless american is how they treat you) to be executed on TV to be used as an example. Med change, sorry, cold turkey from cymbalta, my insurance company wouldn't pay for it for nerve pain use) and the mind zaps are making me insaner. Rant over, going to take good drugs and go to bed since daughter is gone with dad.
Submitted by EastEndGirl on July 14, 2008 - 10:24am.
I’m really considering organizing a gorilla campaign of some sorts.
Like having millions of rolls of toilet paper delivered to the national outlets here who made it a top story, using toilet paper of course to represent their “shit” reporting.
Or have people take a picture of their morning coffee dumps and attach it to their strongly worded letters reminding said “journalists” that they have a duty to themselves and their country to investigate real issues.
But too many hos want to be the busty news reader or the next nationally syndicated twat waffle and not make a difference. BCAUSE THIS LIFE IS ALL ABOUT GETTING PRETTY SHINEY TOYS! More toys, less truth, more political fuckery!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Word LoLo.
I have a "Latest Headlines" button on my toolbar from the BBC. Yesterday, these fucktards ranked #3.
Number fucking three.
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pathetic is chatting with bitch of crazy mouth
Funny Bitch LoLo as FLA
I am outraged that the national and local news outlets have considered this “news” at all. The mere fact that they held a press conference to announce that this unwed woman was still pregnant and had not given birth yet is stomach turning on its own.
Fuck JJ and those loons over there. What we need to do is slam the media and Brangiefuckers PR assholes with as many letters as possible demanding that they actually report on events that make a difference in the world. I don’t want Katie Couric giving me vagina updates on this twatt while I’m eating!
The reports that ANY celebrity did ANYTHING EVER should NOT BE ON THE NIGHTLY NEWS. Save that shit for gossip sites and places like Hell (I mean JJ)
Take it a step further even. When you see Billy Bush types of bubble gum pussy reporters out and about polling the public on their feelings about celebrity shit, slap them in the face! Tell them to go get real jobs. Tell them to go cover the war or get some real dirt on these slippery masters of fuckery we call politicians.
The fact that these people won’t go the fuck away out of the spot light should tell you that they are devils who want to ruin the world. They want to keep you distracted while the real shit goes down. Are we not at war all over the world?
Im sorry, is it not fucked up China is hosting the Olympics? Why do we reward evil and ignore the duties of every citizen to wake the fuck up and make the world better?
Tongue in cheek statement, yes, but you bitches know what I mean.
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
you know what ...
Wait! The wonder twins were born and I missed it?
I thought the cabinets would start to shake, the sky would darken and the earth would open up as a shaft of white light shone down from the heavens to reveal the wondrous miracle to the world?!?!?!
They didn't even have a "Breaking News" to interrupt our regularly scheduled program??? Oh, Angie Ho will not be happy.
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"if I was allergic to nuts, my social life would be O-V-E-R." -M.K.
lizzieb on July 14, 2008 - 9:30am.
'The Sun'- which I am sorry to say is the UK's biggest selling newspaper- has carried the story thus and redeemed themselves in my eyes:
Brad, 44 — who was present at the birth — and Angelina, 33, also have a daughter, Shiloh, two, and three adopted kids.
- This right here is a brilliant exercise of some "sayin' it like it is".
The Brad really had no kind input or action anyway, it could even read that the Brad has kids in addition to Skeletina's adopted brood.
Thanks lizzieb.
?&!
"Don't get me twisted with average fan losers you have encountered. I am not one of them."
"I am more of a manipulative bitch than a cunt"
"LOVE ANGELINA aka HEART ANGELINA aka ???"
Submitted by EvilShoe on July 14, 2008 - 2:28pm.
Be careful. At first it’s mildly diverting to watch these losers froth themselves up into an orgasm of celebrity worship, really believing that these mildly talented and vastly overpaid fame whores are great humanitarians. Then you start to feel the need to post and watch how fast your comment gets deleted. Then you start to twitch and drool.
Be careful.
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Leave the thinking to horses, they've got bigger heads.
I wish the babies all the best because they're gonna need it. Something ain't quite right about their parents (I know--understatement!). Oh well, let's hope the nannies do a good job raising them.
'The Sun'- which I am sorry to say is the UK's biggest selling newspaper- has carried the story thus and redeemed themselves in my eyes:
Brad, 44 — who was present at the birth — and Angelina, 33, also have a daughter, Shiloh, two, and three adopted kids.
HA HA HA- JJ would explode that the bought babies weren't listed as their kids. Despite St Ange buying Maddox years before she stole Brad, and ol' Billy Bob being the name on his receipt they will insist on calling the poor sod Brad's son. Glad someone has some sense.
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Leave the thinking to horses, they've got bigger heads.
MY GOD they are NUTS! One even knew how many days it was until photos of Shiloh were shown on People. They said:
it took 12 days before we saw People’s first pic of Shiloh, so maybe we’ll see pix of the twins around the 24th?
What a bunch of loons, calculating out how many days until they see the twins.
Freaks!
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Dick happens! - MK
Evil Shoe, I can safely say you are not missing anything.
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
KarmaComa. Jamaica Aroma KarmaComa. Jamaica Aroma
I need to check out this JJ site you guys are talking about, I only come here so I am sheltered.
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Dick happens! - MK
I live in Europe and I have to say, Nice Mayor's reaction is very strange. Europeans in general tend to hate American celebrities' asses. They especially hate it when someone makes an American the biggest shit on Earth. So, I think this guy is on his way to lose the next elections for making a fool of himself and taking Nice's citizens along for the ride.
This is just a little bit too excessive...I mean seriously....brad & angelina are just 2 people..and to be dead honest...what have they really done besides movies to be given this much credit?
the world doesn't give credit or attention to doctors who help others, to engineers to work hard to make half of the shit we use, or any scientist who could come up with a cure for disease...instead people worship these 'ACTORS?' LOL
but we give soo much attention to brad+ Angelina?
MK your right..its as if she is a saint pushing out her golden angels or some shit..
Anyway!!
really crazy!!
Have a good one everybody!
ugh. not surprised. as usual those two twats are loving the attention and found more twat disciples to spread the word for them. Johnny Depp and Bono must be thrilled that after living in peace and tranquility for years, those two have moved in so close by to whore the town.
About JJ site, can't remember if it was that site or another, but they were telling people who criticized one of their shitty idols: 'go to Dlisted, that's where all the hard-core posters go.'
Those people are seriously insane, but you have to wonder just who they are when they're calling skanelina an 'angel' and pig faced, beaver toothed miley cyrus a 'knockout.' delusion at its best.