Brooke Hogan Is Not A Voter, But She Is A Dumb Fuck
Last night on "Brooke Knows Shit Best," Brooke interviewed potential roommates and one of them asked her who she was voting for in the presidential election. This is what she said, "You know what? I am actually not that much into voting. I think it’s kinda crazy that a woman is running, because I think that women deal with a lot of emotions and menopause and PMS and stuff. Like, I’m so moody all the time, I know I couldn’t be able to run a country, ‘cause I’d be crying one day and yelling at people the next day, ya know?"
No, Brooke. I don't know. The reason why you're such an emotional wreck is because of al the male hormones and roids you take. The fact that you're a Hogan doesn't help. Not all women are like that. It's just your fucked up family. And you couldn't run a country because you have shit for brains not because you're a woman. Wait, I take that back. Being President has nothing to do with being smart. Look at Dubya.
This is also reason #4,578 on why all the Hogans should not be allowed to breed anymore.
VIA E! Online
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Submitted by Stoney on July 21, 2008 - 4:02pm.
*Flip this House, with My Rage...."
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DING DING DING! WE HAVE A WIENER!
That's the best show name I have ever heard.
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Emotions aren't the only thing holding this dumb bitch from being president. She must get all her smarts from her perv dad.
Submitted by The C word on July 21, 2008 - 2:56pm.
Submitted by HollyMadison on July 21, 2008 - 3:44pm.
thanks for that nice childhood memory guys; I loved that book too :)
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
LCT
I'm taking you to court, you must give me roid money and toilet flash money!
On topic,
when my daughter first started getting periods, she'd come in my room, sit on the bed, and burst into tears. that got old really fast.
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"I don't like your grandma Cartmen, she smells like vitamins and pee."
Submitted by Stock Broker on July 21, 2008 - 4:01pm.
LovesCarrotop ~ she had a regular chick name and I have a regular dude name, so no confusion. She worked in the same office building. After that date, I would occassionally run into her & just get a scowl.
I think she just had a stick up her ass because I showed up 10 min late
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I don't know... calling to let her know probably eliminated any fury over 10 minutes of being late. Had you rescheduled this first date prior, that would explain it. Also, had you been more than 15 minutes late without a call, again, would explain. Did you forget to bring her flowers or compliment her?
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Submitted by TheBreakdown on July 21, 2008 - 2:45pm.
Why are you TYPING so hard?!!!
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Sorry! Sorry! I'll try and type softer! Calm down!
For example:
Sally: "Fuck this stupid fucking notebad. It's too goddamn yellow and it's NOT GODDAMN STICKY ENOUGH!"
Bob: "Whoa, SOMEONE'S PMSing."
*Bob dies*
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ROTFLMAO
That was some funny shit!!
Damn, we could write a show.
"I Love Estrogen"
*Flip this House, with My Rage...."
"Extreme Makeover: Mood Edition"
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"yes, DUH, I am a low rent whore"
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on July 21, 2008 - 2:58pm.
For example:
Sally: "Fuck this stupid fucking notebad. It's too goddamn yellow and it's NOT GODDAMN STICKY ENOUGH!"
Bob: "Whoa, SOMEONE'S PMSing."
*Bob dies*
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LMFAO! I love how Sally says nothing and the next line is *bob dies!*
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
Submitted by christine the hoff on July 21, 2008 - 4:00pm.
LCT
you want to touch my poo?
my eyes are misty now.
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Wait... I thought it was OUR poo? There's someone else, isn't there? I KNEW it. You can keep the corn. Don't be asking me for toilet paper support.
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Tina Tuna - what you described that happened to you makes me SO angry!!!!!! I feel like it happens all the time in the US: image chosen over real substance.
Id say its even moreso in the south and especially texas. Theyre more into the tradional roles and ways of living than either of the coasts...
It also angers me because america is accused of being obsessed with race and racism, but the obsession brings the issue to light (albeit in a warped manner) I belive that sexism exists and no one confronts the issue.
Like black americans, we need good female leaders to continue on the road to equality. And now I feel we're lacking just that.
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
LovesCarrotop ~ she had a regular chick name and I have a regular dude name, so no confusion. She worked in the same office building. After that date, I would occassionally run into her & just get a scowl.
I think she just had a stick up her ass because I showed up 10 min late (but I did call to tell her I was running late).
LCT
you want to touch my poo?
my eyes are misty now.
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"I don't like your grandma Cartmen, she smells like vitamins and pee."
Stock, you must understand one very important thing:
YOU, as a man, should never mention or ask about PMS. Just keep your mouth shut, pretend it doesn't exist, and you won't get hurt!
Edited: except in here of course! Ask aways! We're havig fun!
*trips stock, points and laughs*
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"yes, DUH, I am a low rent whore"
Submitted by Stock Broker on July 21, 2008 - 3:54pm.
LoveCarrotop....you're on to something. She was wearing a pantsuit but she did look CALIENTE in it.
No 2nd date.
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She wore a pantsuit on a first date? Eff yes, she definitely licks the beave. Do you have a name like Sam or Leigh, something that could easily misrepresent your true gender?
And also, what Stoney said: TRUE. Even if a girl PMSing is more obvious than the fact that it's daytime, do NOT mention it.
For example:
Sally: "Fuck this stupid fucking notebad. It's too goddamn yellow and it's NOT GODDAMN STICKY ENOUGH!"
Bob: "Whoa, SOMEONE'S PMSing."
*Bob dies*
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Stoney,
"YOU, as a man, should never mention or ask about PMS. Just keep your mouth shut, pretend it doesn't exist, and you won't get hurt! "
I have 4 really close friends, they all happen to be male. I love when i get the call "Ok, Here is what happened. What did i do wrong?"
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If you've never seen an elephant ski, you've never been on acid. - Izzard
Stoney ~ I learned that lesson the HARD & PAINFUL way with my on-off-on-off girlfriend.
Never again will I suggest taking Midol.
Submitted by HollyMadison on July 21, 2008 - 3:44pm.
C word, your avie is causing really itchy deja-vu. Those books were my favorite when I was young, and I can't remember the name? Wasn't she a teacher that pretended to be an evil witch substitite to teach her students to appreciate her?
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Hi Holly - sorry for the late reply - it's Viola Swamp (the pretend evil substitute) from 'Miss Nelson is Missing'....great book!
OnT: "Voting is, like, haaard."
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
My lyrics are sometimes sexist
But bitches oughta know
I’m trying to correct this.
Submitted by Stock Broker on July 21, 2008 - 3:45pm.
Ex: I had a date once bark at me, "You don't have to open the car door. I can do it my damn self."
Looking back, maybe she was PMS-ing???
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LOL! I had to scroll and scroll to find out what you guys were talking about. It was worth it. LOL!
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Miss American Dream.
Submitted by christine the hoff on July 21, 2008 - 3:51pm.
LCT
does corn count as being ginge?
so far, he's bald.
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YES. Maybe even a few carrot shreds.
Maybe, since it's bald, we can give it a conehead before it hardens.
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Submitted by angel_i on July 21, 2008 - 2:32pm.
Once when I was PMSy I actually turned to my bf and said: Why do you keep BREATHING like that? It was LOUD, bitches! And it was getting on my nerves.
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Sorry all you men Sluts here but I must share with my hormonally challenged lady sluts:
When I get "PMSlay-all-mortals", I stay in my room with my kitties and my sad old black-and-white movies.
Mr. Green-Is-Good avoids the top floor like Beowulf dodging Grendel.
LoveCarrotop....you're on to something. She was wearing a pantsuit but she did look CALIENTE in it.
No 2nd date.
Submitted by Stock Broker on July 21, 2008 - 2:45pm.
Oh yes, she's was definitely PMS-ing! LOL! I think even *I* would be able to hide it on a date!
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"yes, DUH, I am a low rent whore"
Missy and Lozer,
Sadly, you hit the nail on the head. Yes, this country is FAR more sexist than other modern countries. My family is from Sweden, immigrated 34 years ago. My parents have been nothing but patriots of this country. They have lived the American dream and proud of their adopted country. They are saddened by the blatant sexism that exists here though. My twin sister moved back to Sweden 7 years ago and is now the head of the school board for the town she lives in. She was welcomed with open arms.Meanwhile, I tried a run at a position on our local school board here in Texas and the only garbage they could dig up on me was that my husband and I had a baby out of wedlock. I was villified. I was branded a slut and a "not tradition values" kind of person. In October, we will have been married for 15 years, but that didn't matter. The person who won had 2 out of wedlock children with mistresses that he accumulated over the years but he was a man so you know "boys will be boys". He also never finished college yet I had a MA in Education. Maybe this is just Texas but it left me feeling really sick about this country. As for a woman running this country, woman ARE this country. 57% of woman run their own households. They make nearly 90% of the buying decisions yet according to advertisers we can only understand the difficult challenges of how to use a paper towel, a tampon, Mr. Clean and my personal favorite, the mop. Woman are also the ones who are educating the children. Women are the ones who are taking care of the sick, elderly and injured. When will America wake the fuck up?????????????????
LCT
does corn count as being ginge?
so far, he's bald.
okay, lol, I just made my own self sick../
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"I don't like your grandma Cartmen, she smells like vitamins and pee."
Submitted by Clarisse on July 21, 2008 - 3:48pm.
I feel so close to you at this moment...
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I thought about you the whole time Clarisse..
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Submitted by dreamhypnotique on July 21, 2008 - 3:48pm.
ROFLMAO! I can totally see that! ☺
Hi Angel!
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Submitted by Stock Broker on July 21, 2008 - 3:45pm.
Ex: I had a date once bark at me, "You don't have to open the car door. I can do it my damn self."
Looking back, maybe she was PMS-ing???
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Or a closet lesbo.
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
All together now, "Hi Angel!"
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"yes, DUH, I am a low rent whore"
I think that Brooke is a typical sheltered young adult. She is kind of self absorbed and just insn't into politics yet.
How did she find that condo and how is that roomie and Brooke possibly going to pay for that rent every month? It doesn't seem like either work for a living.
Brooke does seem to have a kind heart and that is something that is good to see for this bunch.
Submitted by TheBreakdown on July 21, 2008 - 3:45pm.
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Yeah, some men are mean mofos, too. But, between men and women, I have to say, there is NOTHING in this world meaner than a pissed off queen.
Breakdown ~ nah, I don't believe it!
LCT,
"I'm TOO hydrated, that's the problem! Ok, I'm going to go pee. That's right beetches, as you're reading this, I'll be urinating. How awesome is that? Indeed."
*dabs eye with hankie*
I feel so close to you at this moment...
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If you've never seen an elephant ski, you've never been on acid. - Izzard
Submitted by christine the hoff on July 21, 2008 - 3:47pm.
no problem, I had our poo baby this morning.
named him carrot hoff.
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Our poo baby is here? Please tell me it was a ginge...
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Sometimes men in an office get together in a little kaffeeklatsch during lunch and rail on all the catty women in the building, about how gossipy and shallow they are, then the men get to feeling hypocritical so they start talking about girls they [supposedly] banged.
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You wish.
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique
AIM dreamhypnotique
Submitted by TheBreakdown on July 21, 2008 - 2:45pm.
Psst. Dlisted lady-sluts!
gotta secret for ya:
men are BITCHES *too*
Yes, that's right. All the cattyness you can muster.
Some men are even *gasp* BIGGER bitches!
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You don't have to tell ME, my friend! lol.
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Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron
My ex would have the biggest mood swings when she was S'ing.
Maybe now that's why I like it rough?
Hmmmm.
'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on July 21, 2008 - 2:43pm.
Submitted by christine the hoff on July 21, 2008 - 3:42pm.
no problem, I had our poo baby this morning.
named him carrot hoff.
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"I don't like your grandma Cartmen, she smells like vitamins and pee."
Stock Broker!
Oh Email!! Yeah...blind copies, the one left out off the email feeling betrayed, the "that's not what it meant" arguement!! Good times!
Euphoria,
Thanks! I'm a Bale fan from way back in the day! That is probably only the 2nd time i have seen pics with his little girl. They tend to keep her pretty well protected, if you notice in the pics as soon as people started to move in she disappeared.
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If you've never seen an elephant ski, you've never been on acid. - Izzard
Hi. My name is angel_i and I am a premenstrual(ly) psychopathic bitch.
You learn to cope. When someone cuts you off in traffic and you begin to sob uncontrollably you take note. When you find a sock on the floor, grab a pair of scissors and cut it up into a tiny million pieces, you sit back and reflect a minute. When you find that hours have passed and you have scribbled, in a daze, elaborate schematics to B&E your Ex's house for the purpose of booby trapping every doorway in there...you learn to shake yourself a little and say: Hey. Wouldn't you rather just have some chocolate? :)
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Miss American Dream.
DListed Ladies...these PMS stories are HILARIOUS! I need to share them with my buddies.
That explains a few things for me.
Ex: I had a date once bark at me, "You don't have to open the car door. I can do it my damn self."
Looking back, maybe she was PMS-ing???
Submitted by Stock Broker on July 21, 2008 - 3:41pm.
Clarisse ~ the emails they send back & forth and then cc: others in the office are hilarious!
Its like HS all over again.
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I rest my case. Like I said, they get all of their friends in on it and get pissed if their friends don't spew hatred for some percieved wrong, by proxy.
Psst. Dlisted lady-sluts!
gotta secret for ya:
men are BITCHES *too*
Yes, that's right. All the cattyness you can muster.
Some men are even *gasp* BIGGER bitches!
Why are you TYPING so hard?!!!
'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston
SAD
C word, your avie is causing really itchy deja-vu. Those books were my favorite when I was young, and I can't remember the name? Wasn't she a teacher that pretended to be an evil witch substitite to teach her students to appreciate her?
Submitted by christine the hoff on July 21, 2008 - 3:42pm.
LCT
if you do, you'll miss your toilet times.
stay hydrated! it's crucial.
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I'm TOO hydrated, that's the problem! Ok, I'm going to go pee. That's right beetches, as you're reading this, I'll be urinating. How awesome is that? Indeed.
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It's Carpet-Munching Monday! Strap on your chinguards!
Whenever this she-male opens her mouth, it makes her and the whole family look like the idiots they are. Which I fully support.
LCT
if you do, you'll miss your toilet times.
stay hydrated! it's crucial.
on topic
damn, I got nothing.
I do have to mention though, I work with men and i find the fighting worse because it escalates a whole lot faster.
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"I don't like your grandma Cartmen, she smells like vitamins and pee."
Clarisse ~ the emails they send back & forth and then cc: others in the office are hilarious!
Its like HS all over again.
Clarisse, I'm luvin' your avie! The pix of Christian with his daughter, Emmaline (or Emmeline, whatever) are all the more dreamy! Don't know what it is about a hot guy with a child...I guess it's seeing this big, strong man be so tender with a little one. *swoons*