Tuesday, July 29th 2008
Would You Hit It?
Scream "YES!!!!" from your cubicle or wherever you are, because you know you would hit that shit in a flash. You would sweat on that oldie!
Everyone knows that if you let Richard Simmons stick the tip in, you'll live forever. Not only will you live forever, but you'll shit rainbows too.
Here's happiest homo in all the land outside of "The Late Show" last night.
Wireimage, Wenn
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my 1st smile of the day...and it's 8:44 pm here
["Dude, your friends asked me to give you a message: Dump the bitch before you're sorry!"
'"Before you're sorry" a surprised Larson parrots].-
Too funny to be true.
But seriously Jorge, dump the witch bitch before u're sorry!
I wouldn't hit it but I might be tempted to give it a hug. With so many deaths of celebrities that I watched as I was growing up, it's kind of reassurng to see one that's still going strong.
*Rose tint my world, keep me safe from the trouble and pain*
Submitted by Sheeps on July 30, 2008 - 12:59am.
The funny thing, of course, is that he's one of the least fit, healthy people you're likely to find.
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For reals? He's 60 years old! But you know - I did always think of him as marketing towards "average" people rather than the superfit types.
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Miss American Dream.
The funny thing, of course, is that he's one of the least fit, healthy people you're likely to find.
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"His romantic attachments ran to the, shall we say, exotic."
Ain't no other whiteboy on the planet can rock the 'fro like Richard! I love this queen!
Ok.....Bob Ross would be the exception. But he's dead.
He's utterly batshit, but in that harmless, merely annoying way.
I remember when Liberace wasn't gay either....
or George Michael
or Ellen....
lmao, Rich, dude...you act the flamin' homo, you get called the flamin' homo , if it walks like a duck and it quacks like a duck, and wears short shorts, it probably sucks cock...
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hot damn, ho, here we go again.
does richard own a pair of long pants and a regular button down shirt? my guess is no...
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butt sex can lead to ass babies...be sure to use a condom...
To all my Dlist pals (and MK):
Glad you liked my story about Richard! It's always been one of my favorites and I thought y'all would enjoy it. I'm only sorry there weren't pictures *evil grin* but my pornpal only kissed and told.
"Rhoda, we're all aware that you're an adroit liar"
He's fucking hardcore...didn't he slap the shit out of some wrestler for making of fun of "sweatin to the oldies"? lmfao
One thing I gotta say, more celebrities should be so kind to their fans as Richard is!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Richard Simmons is one of those guys you feel bad for for being gay, not out of any homophobia, but because no gay man would ever want to tap that! He's a truly kind hearted person, but sometimes all the personality in the world can't save you when you look that aweful. The saddest part is, It's completly fixable!! He only needs to fix his hair and wear nice clothes, And he can certainly get a date with someone! His problem is he chooses to be unattractive, not that he just is. I know this look made him famous, but you gotta change with the times!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
YAY - I LOVE Richard Simmons!
*Would You Hit It?*
That's a big TEN-NEGATORY good buddy
I like Richard! I used to wake up early on Saturday mornings, and you could always count on his infommercial for "Sweating to the Oldies" to be on. He will never ever change his style because it is his trademark... An afro and a pair of candy cane hot shorts. ** Mr. Mercury that was a very interesting story.
"Now his failure is complete"... Darth Vader
Everytime I see him I think of Jim Carrey playing him & the "Shed-A-Bed" diet.
"Your husband had sex with you? EWWWWW!!!"
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
Am I getting old or is the supermarket playing great music?
Submitted by Karen Flatts on July 29, 2008 - 3:49pm.
Yes, but only from the projectile vomiting, rampant diarrhea and years of anorexia induced by depression to follow.
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I've already had the diarrhea and depression... I'll pass.
Embrace the chunk!
☠
"What's a 'radical footrub'? They rub your feet and tell you to overthrow the government at the same time?" -Joe Rogan
http://www.myspace.com/zoloftpony
It either looks like he's about to pop a squat or he's double jointed in these pics. I always thought he was gay or in the closet. Apparently deep, waayyy deep in the closet.
Your face!
his shoes ALWAYS look like they are on kris/kros backwards ..
Submitted by rescueme on July 29, 2008 - 3:38pm.
HE IS NOT GAY. he even cried and ran off the howard stern show when they asked about it years ago.
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thats right! in his autobiography he never mentions
anything but his love for his dalmations...wait maybe that was code for something??
-=meow hiss purr=-
He is my favorite comedian. I saw his profile on millionaire&celeb dating site ---""""""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""" ----" last week. It is said he is in relationship with a young beautiful woman on that site now.
I love how he's been wearing the same outfit (& hairstyle) since 1982.
Submitted by day shift stripper on July 29, 2008 - 12:48pm.
If he sticks the tip in, do I start losing weight?
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Yes, but only from the projectile vomiting, rampant diarrhea and years of anorexia induced by depression to follow.
Submitted by rescueme on July 29, 2008 - 12:38pm.
HE IS NOT GAY. he even cried and ran off the howard stern show when they asked about it years ago.
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Yes, but first he crossed his legs daintily, put his hand over his mouth and screeched "Gay! Why in all of my life. I've never!"
If he sticks the tip in, do I start losing weight?
☠
"What's a 'radical footrub'? They rub your feet and tell you to overthrow the government at the same time?" -Joe Rogan
http://www.myspace.com/zoloftpony
Richard is a giver, he gives, it's what he does.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
"I'm OK. You're...fucked up"
HE IS NOT GAY. he even cried and ran off the howard stern show when they asked about it years ago.
God put Richard Simmons on this earth so that all of the morbidly obese middle-aged housewives of the world would have a true friend. Unlike the characters on their "Stories", Richard actually talks back and is willing to touch them (in a completely platonic and unsexual way, of course).
They in turn get to meet a real, live gay man and realize that they will not be incinerated by a bolt of lightning by being nice to him. It's a win-win situation.
I do love Richard, though.
Hit it, no. I would give it a hug though. I love that bitch.
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Geez, Banana shut your friggin' gob, okay?
I can't help it, I love him.
I'd hit it! With some awesome beats! Girlfriend would start dancin' around...ahhhh funny shit
♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦
sad
He's one of those queens who's never in a bad mood.
A total Gayelle!! But it's sad when host's n such make fun of him right to his face, he kind of brushes it off, but you can tell by the look on his face that he's hurt by the comments.. poor poor gayelle..
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Pop pills, Pills I pop, Pop two pills
On stilts I walk; Snort two lines that were filled with chalk; Thought I was incredible and killed the hulk;
Richard Simmons is like Twinkies: either you love it or you hate it; there's no middle ground.
Also like Twinkies, RS is too saccharine to stomach after awhile.
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I didn’t say that it was your fault – I said that I was going to blame you.
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Interesting Mr. Mercury...very interesting! Gene is a happy little elf and I just love him
beef fetish and all.
OT: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hitting this allowed for me :)
He's funny but makes me a little queasy with those menopausal lady "sweating to the oldies" commercials.
Not even with your dick!
been there
done that.
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"Stanley, that better be me you're having sex with"
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I LOVE Richard Simmons Fuck The Bullshit. You cant hate on him he is a genuine good person, those don't come along too often. Keep on dancing queen Richard.
"I think you know that your more then just some fucked up piece of ass."
George Fuckin Michael.
Richard Simmons is the faggiest fag that ever fagged on God's green, and we all love him. Love him on Letterman and he seems like a nice enough guy, out-dated Afro and all.
'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston
He's gaytastic in every way but he seems genuinely kind and generous. There aren't enough people like him!
I have nothing negative to say.
I think he is a nice guy..
the type that would be friendly and pleasant if you saw him on the street and approached him.
Never change, Richard Simmons!
Mr. Mercury, hahaha. What a great story!
I can just imagine Richard in one of his big ass tank tops rolling around in beef, screaming. lol
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RIMADYL KILLS
Rest In Peace, baby boy
I love you
EWWW MK! I just ate!
lol
But I think he seems like a really nice guy. He probably makes a great bff. tee hee
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
Rest In Peace, baby boy
I love you
Ahh I have nothing bad to say, he may be a little eccentric but he genuinely helps people improve their lives and spends hours writing, e-mailing, talking on the phone to people who need help. Can't fault that.
Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia Gay!
God bless his gayest of gay asses, I love him when he's on Letterman.
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
I think if W. made him his press secretary a few years ago we would have all felt SUPER about things.
AWWW...he seems like a sweet little princess. The camel knees and feather tank crack me up...you go Dickie!!!
I can't see him being the stickee. I can only picture him being stuck and that is an image that I want permanently erased.
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And in the end the love you take
Is equal to the love you make