Wipe That Shit-Eating Grin Off Your Face

Tommy Girl has no reason to smile. The dumb bitch has just been named in a $250 million lawsuit against Scientology. The lawsuit was filed by an ex-Scientologist that goes by the name of Peter Letterese. Peter filed using the RICO statue. You know what RICO is if you saw "The Dark Knight." Everything I know, I learned from "The Dark Knight." Petey claims the aliens harassed his ass after he left their clan.

Rush & Molloy has the smart people details:

In court papers provided to The News by investigator Paul Barresi, Letterese claims a member of the church phoned his lawyer at home, and when the lawyer's wife answered, said he was her husband's homosexual lover.

Barresi, who has done investigative work on behalf of Cruise, tells us: "[Letterese] is just including a celebrity name to get attention." Letterese calls the church a "crime syndicate" and wants it broken up under the Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organization law, just as the feds have broken up Mafia families.

He singles out Cruise, who's made no secret of his religion, saying that Scientology head David Miscavage is "aided and abetted by the actions of Tom Cruise, his right-hand man for foreign and domestic promotion, as well as for foreign and domestic lobbying. He has assisted the syndicate in acquiring funds and [made] his own donations of money believed to be in the multiple tens of millions of dollars."

One of Letterese's beefs is that the church allegedly uses a business book, "Effective Sales Closing Techniques," as part of its teachings. He says this violates his intellectual property rights, since he bought the rights to the book from the widow of author Leslie Dane.

Wait....so Tommy Girl's private investigator handed over the court papers to Rush & Molly? And isn't Paul Barresi a former porn star?! Something smells fishy and it's not Tommy Girl's ass jelly. Actually, Tommy's ass jelly smells like a mixture of rotten trout and boiled beef. Surf and turf!

Petey is seriously one brave bitch. Hopefully this lawsuit goes somewhere, because I can't wait for the juicy shit that is going to come pouring out. Juicy like Tommy Girl's.....Oh, you know!