Joss Stone Ruined A Baptism!
Joss "fucks for tracks" Stone pissed off her entire family when she showed up 30-minutes late to the baptism of her half-brother's one-year-old son. They were waiting for her ass, because she was supposed to be the godmother.
She angered her family even more when she refused to read the church order of service and called them "old biddies" when they called her out on it. She's so proper. I probably would have called them "a bunch of memaw cunts."
Things turned violent when her half-brother, Daniel, started getting on her case. A witness to this amazing event said, "She was absolutely furious and they had a full-blown argument. They were screaming at each other and the next thing, Joss headbutted him. Other family members ran over to break it up and she stormed off. It turned from a nice family affair into a brawl between Joss and her brother. No one could believe it."
Headbutted him?! Bitch is no joke. It was sort of smart of her to headbutt him. She didn't want to ruin her nails. A swift kick to the corn nuts would've been better, but to each his own.
There's really nothing like a good old-fashioned family brawl. I wish my baptism was like this. The most exciting thing that happened at my baptism was when I pissed myself during the mass. And no, my baptism was not last week! I know what you were thinking! I take pills for that now.
U.................G...............L..................Y!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
Hello, trying too hard.
So whose cock did you have to suck for that contract, sweetheart?
Get a boob job bitch....you're so not sexy...
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So why are we all here again?
Who fucking cares about this skank cunt anyway.
isn't it obvious that no one in her family had tracks for joss to fuck for...
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butt sex can lead to ass babies...be sure to use a condom...
No different from my usual family gatherings.
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"I was hoping to dress something like Prince. But toned down, as if he were going to the zoo or the supermarket." - Jemaine Clement
There has to be footage of her headbutting him. I'm hoping there's also footage of Mark 'hot bitch' Ronson turning her down.
That's insane! How you go to a family member's Christening and act like that? If you're THAT into thinking that the world revolves around you, just stay the fuck home. Yeesh. I would lose my temper if I witnessed that, I think.
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
Avvie courtesy of Viva La Lohan.
Sounds like someone needs an exorcism.
She looks beautiful and sexy. I saw her profile on milllionaire&celeb personals site """"C e l e b C u p i d.c o m""""""last week. It is said she is dating young billionaire on that site.
She felt inadequate to be the godmother so she opted instead for being the devilmother. When she found she wasn't sufficiently evil yet to seize the souls of the family, she finally just settled for smacking them around in the House of God, which, one has to admit, is impressively diabolical.
Just another average, boring bitch who thinks she's actually cute just because low-life guys will praise her to get a blowjob. NEXT.
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I love you. No, really.
www.myspace.com/dreamhypnotique
This chick has no class. She ruined her nephew's baptism being a cunt and her brother should've drop kicked her ass in the throat.
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"Ed Westwick is not gay - he's British!"
Also, Joss looks like her head is on backwards, like her back bones are poking out, and that isn't her chest.. baby boobs!
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Pop pills, Pills I pop, Pop two pills
On stilts I walk; Snort two lines that were filled with chalk; Thought I was incredible and killed the hulk;
MelTang, I read that story the other day about that guy from your H.S. killing him self. Did he do that recently or back in H.S. That is awful, Kids are so cruel, that makes my heart break for him, being so unhappy his whole life.
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 7, 2008 - 12:27pm.
Sometimes I wish I was famous. Just think, you could walk out of stores without paying for shit, and when they tell you to, you just look at them with your giant bug shades and say, "Don't you know who I am? I'm a celebrity." and walk away.
Also, you could do whatever you wanted to people (headbutting, phone throwing, burrito/deli meat tossing) and nothing would ever happen to do. Feel like doing some coke in public? Go for it. Say it's 'for a roll' [sic]. Want to get drunk and drive around on the freeway while crashing into medians and other cars! Have a blast, and then tell the cops when they pull you over that you were abused as a child. Works like a hot damn.
You took the words right out of my mouth. LOL
Another set of laws does exist for the 'speshul' people. It's so unfair.
<3-------------------------------<3
Chelsea Handler as Dina Lohan. Brilliant. :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWngTmiIur4&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhPRQbFJjfU
lol...you and your stories MK
"Joss headbutted him" damn kid!
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"D-Listed is like chicks who hang out together for a long time- they start getting their periods the same day.
All d-listed sluts start to think exactly alike after a while. LOLOLOLOL" Mel-tang!
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 7, 2008 - 11:12am.
So basically, being a director, you can tell anyone to do whatever you want, right? But can you participate? I wonder what you'd get being a film-crew person...
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Well, I know Martin Scorsese shows up in a lot of his films, as well as Quentin Tarantino and some others. I think if you're a film-crew person, you're pretty much fucked-- you end up having twins with Julia Roberts.
Xxyxz.. Are you still around??
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Pop pills, Pills I pop, Pop two pills
On stilts I walk; Snort two lines that were filled with chalk; Thought I was incredible and killed the hulk;
Submitted by Karen Flatts on August 7, 2008 - 2:01pm.
That reminds me of part of Jim Gaffigan's routine where he says that he wishes he could be a Director in real life. So when someone is telling him a boring story he can just go "And, cut! We got it". When he comes in late he can stop his wife bitching and say "And cut! Let's try it again, only this time you don't care where I've been, in fact you're happy to see me. Let's try it topless...Action!"
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So basically, being a director, you can tell anyone to do whatever you want, right? But can you participate? I wonder what you'd get being a film-crew person...
BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! meh. sniffle.
Headbutts at a dunk-the-tot service. Joss you ROCK! I'm going to one of those time wasters this Sunday. Screaming and head butts would totally liven it up. Yeah, the paruntal units are only doing this farce for the grandparents. Why bother?
"I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by."
~~~Douglas Adams~~~
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 7, 2008 - 10:27am.
Sometimes I wish I was famous. Just think, you could walk out of stores without paying for shit, and when they tell you to, you just look at them with your giant bug shades and say, "Don't you know who I am? I'm a celebrity." and walk away.
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That reminds me of part of Jim Gaffigan's routine where he says that he wishes he could be a Director in real life. So when someone is telling him a boring story he can just go "And, cut! We got it". When he comes in late he can stop his wife bitching and say "And cut! Let's try it again, only this time you don't care where I've been, in fact you're happy to see me. Let's try it topless...Action!"
Yeah. I've seen that clip a few too many times.
Submitted by Cokeasian on August 7, 2008 - 6:53pm.
I despise her bland music but I don't blame her on this one. I'm sure she was only asked to be a godmother because of her fame and money
*
Yeah, beacause a half brother would only want his half sister to be a Godmother to his kid, if she were rich, fame whore and not because the are family who grew up together (probably).
~♥~"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why they call it a present.” – Eleanor Roosevelt~♥
Last Xtina sighting - August 4th 2008
I despise her bland music but I don't blame her on this one. I'm sure she was only asked to be a godmother because of her fame and money.
Submitted by ILovePapaSmurf on August 7, 2008 - 1:31pm
Dont worry the chop her head off , I hope so
Submitted by Tigerlilly on July 14, 2008 - 8:39pm.
HUG ME JESUS! I SAY, HUG ME JESUS!!!! Can I get an Amen from the DListed congregation...I say, can I GET AN AMEN FROM THE DLISTED CONGREGATION???? You know you ho's want a hug from Jesus
@JadedK,
They, like the rest of us, would enjoy a good beheading?
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"Sometimes when we focus too much on who will lead our country, we lose sight of the important things, like celebrity babies."
~Keith Olbermann
Submitted by ILovePapaSmurf on August 7, 2008 - 1:31pm.
Am I the only one that's upset over the fact that Joss is going to play one of Henry's wives in the upcoming season of "The Tudors?"
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO this dirty tampon going to destroy my favorite show if her acting anything like her singing why the fuck would they cast this cunt
:(
George Carlin went to Heaven and left us with Dane Cook here in Hell
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You know, I rather like this God fellow. Very theatrical, you know. Pestilence here, a plague there. Omnipotence ... gotta get me some of that
I AM GONNA HEAD BUTT SOMEBODY!!! No one told me we were having a party with a food fight! I am bringing mashed pots because nothing flings further!
Perhaps we can serve Subway.
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"Sometimes when we focus too much on who will lead our country, we lose sight of the important things, like celebrity babies."
~Keith Olbermann
NitWitty
I'm doing good. Nice to see you
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 7, 2008 - 12:39pm.
If that bitch had any sense of decorum she would have waited until the party, ya know, and started a food fight.
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Word! Talk about No Klass!
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
Hi Nitty!
shit- my dog is chasing a butterfly and barking like mad!
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I need someone, a person to talk to,
Someone who'd care, to love
Could it be you? Could it be you?
- Violent Femmes "Kiss Off"
Submitted by NitWitty on August 7, 2008 - 10:32am.
Jeeze! What's wrong with this whore? She obviously has no patience. Doesn't she know you're supposed to wait and do that shit in the church parking lot?!
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If that bitch had any sense of decorum she would have waited until the party, ya know, and started a food fight.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
"Only those who dare to fail greatly,
can ever achieve greatly." -- Robert F. Kennedy
Hey, Xxy!! How you doing, laday? Afternoon to MK and all the hot sluts up in here!
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
NitWitty
Xoxoxo
Jeeze! What's wrong with this whore? She obviously has no patience. Doesn't she know you're supposed to wait and do that shit in the church parking lot?!
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
is this story TRUE?
What a fucking loser.
~♥~"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why they call it a present.” – Eleanor Roosevelt~♥
Last Xtina sighting - August 4th 2008
Sometimes I wish I was famous. Just think, you could walk out of stores without paying for shit, and when they tell you to, you just look at them with your giant bug shades and say, "Don't you know who I am? I'm a celebrity." and walk away.
Also, you could do whatever you wanted to people (headbutting, phone throwing, burrito/deli meat tossing) and nothing would ever happen to do. Feel like doing some coke in public? Go for it. Say it's 'for a roll' [sic]. Want to get drunk and drive around on the freeway while crashing into medians and other cars! Have a blast, and then tell the cops when they pull you over that you were abused as a child. Works like a hot damn.
good for her. I'd be mad they wasted my day w/ that crap too.
guess next time, they'll pick a more appropriate person to be godmother. it's suppose to be a well thought decision.
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Blogs aren't for the sensitive at heart - FU
I'm NOT an economist, I'm an optimist. GW Bush
what wrong is whit this woman you dont arrive 30 minete later to a baptism and whit more reason if you are supposed to be the godmother so fucking disrecpectful , If I was her brother her ass would have being replace by the first ho available
Submitted by Tigerlilly on July 14, 2008 - 8:39pm.
HUG ME JESUS! I SAY, HUG ME JESUS!!!! Can I get an Amen from the DListed congregation...I say, can I GET AN AMEN FROM THE DLISTED CONGREGATION???? You know you ho's want a hug from Jesus
terrible titties on this dude!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
@ soul: not WWE.
G.L.O.W.!
that is all.
'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston
And Mark Ronson's still not impressed.
yeah don't tell Joss Stone nuthin. she's going places, straight to the WWE. Wrasslin.LOL
http://www.wwe.com/
If her "tracks" are a reflection of how she "fucks", bitch needs to bring out the inner amazon ho and maybe she'll have a "hit" but not by a hammer.
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
At least her hair is purty now
TheBreakdown
Well aint she just a peach!! Thanks for the info - I had heard the phrase before but had no clue that it meant exactly what it said!
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Pimpcessa:
when her last album dropped, some of the producers came forward and stated that she was riding the studio booth-heads for choice tracks.
Well, she should have fucked alot harder, because her last album tanked.
'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston
What a stupid bitch! Is she like that naturally or was she on something?
.•´¯`•-><-•´¯`•..•´¯`•-><-•´¯`•..•´¯`•->
"Asshole . . . get that down or else you better pawn your cat because you'll need the money!" Tricia Walsh-Smith: Patroness of Angry Divorcés
Isnt headbutting a very European thing to do? I want to know about the fucks for tracks thing too!!!
☆★your☆★soul☆★has☆★been☆★☆eated★☆
www.seekingdesperately.blogspot.com/