Wednesday, August 13th 2008
Brit Brit's Favorite Things
*Image Removed Per Request From OK!*
And I'm not talking about SPF or JJ. I'm talking about Cheeeeeeetos and Sunkiiiiiiist! Look at JJ's face. He's thinking, "Is she going to share her Cheetos this time?" Sorry, kid. It's never going to happen.
I'm totally having this picture made into a beautiful velvet painting to hang over my toilet. It's that amazing.
VIA Breathe Heavy
Thanks Al
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Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 13, 2008 - 9:26pm.
Cheesus loves you. I shall baptise thee in cheeto dust if you accept cheesus into your heart.
Ummmm.... sure! I don't have to go have sexy times with a Cheeto and birth its orange powder baby do I?
LCT, wellllllllll. The Holy Cheeto spirit might swoop down upon you and yes, you might indeed have an immaculate conceptualized "cheeto child" but if it's Lord Cheeto's way then so be it and be unafraid (I hear the holy cheeto has a HUGE cheese loaf, homina, homina).
-And don't be a laffin' at the pruno and purple drank. That's for Kizzy's burfday and I baked a cake but forgot the eggs so now it's a pancake but I made ten layers and put some buttercream frosting on it and tried to hide my culinary mishap. I cried. Oh lawd how I cried. Then I put a candle (roman candle by accident) and oh whatta fuckin' mess. *cry*
In other news, Britney spears poses with her children with sippy cups filled with god-only-knows-what, cheetos and a full plate of tragedy!
Britney's daddy has been calling James Haven for advise. James Haven told him there are some things MaryKay cannot fix and crazy in da head is one of them! There aren't enough cheeto's in the world to keep Britney from going batshit again. Daddy Spears says he just wants to get back to the bayou. James Haven commended him on the job he was doing. Making sure Britney wears her undies everyday is no easy task, Nasty!
It brought to mind the time of James Haven's 6th birthday. Daddy Voight was in charge of the cake. When the cake was wheeled in, James Haven was giggling and clapping in anticipation that the fireworks on his cake were about to blow. Imagine his surprise when a woman named Dusty popped out of the cake wearing nothing but a cowboy hat and holster!
Granny Voight fainted, Angie ran for her gun, and Daddy Voight started licking the whipped cream off of Dusty's ass!
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See James Haven in an Oscar winning performance!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w9cKFiCrSU
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Kizzy, did you do anything to celebrate your barfday? (Sorry if you already answered this question, as I am too lazy to scroll back thru the posts)
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Hi5.
Submitted by Gonnaburn... on August 13, 2008 - 9:25pm
It was a typo, I swear.
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Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!
Peter: That's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk!
Submitted by Sugaroo on August 13, 2008 - 9:20pm.
I EAT PASTE!
*slinking into corner*
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Psst!! Psst!! ***glancing left & right*** I got rubber cement. With the brush applicator.
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♥♥ Yah, iz mah birfday beeeshes!!! ♥♥
Kizzy, if I knew Gerry Butler in real life, for your birthday, I'd put him in a glass box in your room for you to look at. NO TOUCHY.
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I got attitude in my horse pills!
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 13, 2008 - 9:24pm.
You smell like a sandbox.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
No, I smell like mothballs. Get it right, Sprite!
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Laissez le bon temps rouler!
Submitted by Kizzy on August 13, 2008 - 9:25pm.
DON'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THUMBTACKS!! I WILL RIP YOUR STENCILS RIGHT OUT OF YOUR LAMINATE!! YOUR CHALKHOLDER WILL FEEL THE POWER OF MY PARTICLEBOARD AS I TAKE YOU TO PAPER MACHE!!
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NOW LISTEN HERE SCOTCH TAPE! YOUR DUOTANGS ARE NO MATCH FOR MY FOIL LINED LUNCHLADY MEATLOAF TRAYS. NOW TAKE YOUR CONSTRUCTION PAPER DESKTOP AND CRAP IT UP YOUR LYSOL HOLE.
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I got attitude in my horse pills!
Submitted by Mr. President on August 13, 2008 - 9:20pm.
HAPPY BIRFDAY KIZZY!!!
*Raises beer, Cranks up the Def Leppard*
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Many, many thanks Mr. President!!
I don't want your...I don't need your...what I've got is a photograph....you've gone straight to my head!!!!!!!!!
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♥♥ Yah, iz mah birfday beeeshes!!! ♥♥
Lil' JJ looks like my 7 year old cousin in this photo.
It must be noted that my little cousin is slightly slow. Coincidence? Non, mon cherie.
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Hi5.
Submitted by . on August 13, 2008 - 9:21pm.
Cheesus loves you. I shall baptise thee in cheeto dust if you accept cheesus into your heart.
Well.
Do you?
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Ummmm.... sure! I don't have to go have sexy times with a Cheeto and birth its orange powder baby do I?
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I got attitude in my horse pills!
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 13, 2008 - 9:12pm.
Submitted by Kizzy on August 13, 2008 - 9:02pm.
DON'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THUMBTACKS!! I WILL RIP YOUR STENCILS RIGHT OUT OF YOUR LAMINATE!! YOUR CHALKHOLDER WILL FEEL THE POWER OF MY PARTICLEBOARD AS I TAKE YOU TO PAPER MACHE!!
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♥♥ Yah, iz mah birfday beeeshes!!! ♥♥
Submitted by . on August 13, 2008 - 9:21pm.
That's it! Fuck it! I'm gonna brew up some jail pruno, purple drank and buy a Costco sized bag of cheetos and ya'll are invited. I'm not wastin' the pot on no brownies though. Uh-uh. That's 70's shit. My shit is too good to waste on no freakin' brownies. Light up and let's do the cheeto cheesus dance!
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Wooohoooo! Party times at period's house!
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I got attitude in my horse pills!
Submitted by Team Valtrex on August 13, 2008 - 8:47pm.
Imagine your s/o's dissappointment.
Submitted by Sugaroo on August 13, 2008 - 9:20pm.
I EAT PASTE!
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You smell like a sandbox.
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I got attitude in my horse pills!
Glycerol ester of wood rosin is what I used to refinish my coffee table.
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Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!
Peter: That's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk!
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 13, 2008 - 9:15pm.
Not my ogre. I make sure he goes out with wrinkled clothes, never wears his wedding ring and looks like an unkempt nightmare. No woman would want his ass or believe he was somewhat successful. I really don't have to work at that though, he's naturally that way, how the fuck I ever fell for him is still a mystery even to me. I guess, I love dirty, hairy, sweaty men. Is that wrong? ;p
That's it! Fuck it! I'm gonna brew up some jail pruno, purple drank and buy a Costco sized bag of cheetos and ya'll are invited. I'm not wastin' the pot on no brownies though. Uh-uh. That's 70's shit. My shit is too good to waste on no freakin' brownies. Light up and let's do the cheeto cheesus dance!
Cheesus loves you. I shall baptise thee in cheeto dust if you accept cheesus into your heart.
Well.
Do you?
I EAT PASTE!
*slinking into corner*
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Laissez le bon temps rouler!
HAPPY BIRFDAY KIZZY!!!
*Raises beer, Cranks up the Def Leppard*
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Submitted by Kizzy on August 13, 2008 - 9:15pm.
DON'T MAKE ME KICK YOUR LOCKER COMBINATION OVER YOUR MOP BUCKET!! I'LL PULL YOUR FIRE ALARM RIGHT OUTTA YOUR SQUEEGEE!!
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I SWEAR TO OXYCLEAN, YOU BETTER SHUT YOUR LOADING DOCK OR I'M GOING TO GET ALL FLOOR WAXY UP IN THIS GYMNASIUM!
The cockroaches in my apartment ate all the termites.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Submitted by Mr. President on August 13, 2008 - 6:15pm.
For termites.
Submitted by Sheeps on August 13, 2008 - 9:11pm.
Mr. Prez: I was kinda ok with some of that list but what the heck is "Glycerol ester of wood rosin"?
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Lunch.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
Submitted by . on August 13, 2008 - 9:02pm.
LTC & Kizzy,
You two are making me cry from laughing so GD hard! :))
lmao. Actually, hubster objected to the "hot slut of the day" thing too but then again, he's an ogre but he's MY ogre. ;p
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Ogres are fucking sexy.
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I got attitude in my horse pills!
Submitted by Sugaroo on August 13, 2008 - 9:07pm.
Submitted by Kizzy on August 13, 2008 - 9:02pm.
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 13, 2008 - 8:36pm
Hey Sugaroo!!!
DON'T MAKE ME KICK YOUR LOCKER COMBINATION OVER YOUR MOP BUCKET!! I'LL PULL YOUR FIRE ALARM RIGHT OUTTA YOUR SQUEEGEE!!
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♥♥ Yah, iz mah birfday beeeshes!!! ♥♥
Submitted by Team Valtrex on August 13, 2008 - 6:12pm.
Shit, I approve too. Add vodka to that list and you have what I like to call "dinner".
Add vodka to that list and it's suddenly the most nutritious thing on the list.
Submitted by Kizzy on August 13, 2008 - 9:02pm.
ANY MORE OF THIS FUCKERY AND YOUR SHOWER STALLS WILL BE IN THE PENCIL SHARPENERS!! I WILL CRAM YOUR PAPER TOWEL DISPENSER RIGHT UP YOUR CHALKBOARD!! YOUR SOAP PUMP WILL NEVER DEFEAT MY SOUP LADLES!!
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DON'T THREATEN ME YOU MENTHOL SCENTED URINAL CAKE! I WILL RAM MY INDUSTRIAL SWEEPER DOWN YOUR TRASHBIN SO FAR YOUR SAWDUST COVERED DRYWALL FLAKES WILL BE SCREAMING FOR THE PHOTOCOPIER TO CALL IN THREE-HOLE PUNCH REINFORCEMENTS!
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I got attitude in my horse pills!
Submitted by Sheeps on August 13, 2008 - 9:08pm.
Shit, I approve too. Add vodka to that list and you have what I like to call "dinner".
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Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!
Peter: That's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk!
Mr. Prez: I was kinda ok with some of that list but what the heck is "Glycerol ester of wood rosin"?
Submitted by Sheeps on August 13, 2008 - 9:01pm.
Reads like the contents of my fridge.
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"I think we'll need some more FBI guys."
@TV,
or a cockroach...lol.
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"Practically" is not an option when it comes to virginity.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on August 13, 2008 - 6:04pm.
If you add a hard plastic shell to that list of ingredients, you have a car battery.
No shit. But mother-of-the-year approves.
Submitted by Kizzy on August 13, 2008 - 9:02pm.
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 13, 2008 - 8:36pm.
Guess who:
ANY MORE OF THIS FUCKERY AND YOUR SHOWER STALLS WILL BE IN THE PENCIL SHARPENERS!! I WILL CRAM YOUR PAPER TOWEL DISPENSER RIGHT UP YOUR CHALKBOARD!! YOUR SOAP PUMP WILL NEVER DEFEAT MY SOUP LADLES!!
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♥♥ Yah, iz mah birfday beeeshes!!! ♥♥
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Oh man. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! Now I get it! How's that janitor's closet treating ya! Quelle douche.
Hi Kizzy! Guess who! *wink* (This has nothing to do with what I said above - I really mean Hi Kizzy!)
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Laissez le bon temps rouler!
Happy Birfday, Kizzy!!!
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"Practically" is not an option when it comes to virginity.
Cute mom and adorable babe. I saw her profile on milllionaire personals site """"""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m""""" last month. What kind of relationship is she looking for on that site?
Submitted by Sheeps on August 13, 2008 - 9:01pm.
If you add a hard plastic shell to that list of ingredients, you have a car battery.
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Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!
Peter: That's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk!
LTC & Kizzy,
You two are making me cry from laughing so GD hard! :))
lmao. Actually, hubster objected to the "hot slut of the day" thing too but then again, he's an ogre but he's MY ogre. ;p
Yaknow what? This shit vindicates MK for every post he's ever done about Britney and her cheetos. HELLO. TRUTH! HELLO.
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 13, 2008 - 8:36pm.
Guess who:
ANY MORE OF THIS FUCKERY AND YOUR SHOWER STALLS WILL BE IN THE PENCIL SHARPENERS!! I WILL CRAM YOUR PAPER TOWEL DISPENSER RIGHT UP YOUR CHALKBOARD!! YOUR SOAP PUMP WILL NEVER DEFEAT MY SOUP LADLES!!
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♥♥ Yah, iz mah birfday beeeshes!!! ♥♥
She can't even pretend to be bothered to make it look like she feeds the kids healthy nutritious food. So you know that this probably also means this is exactly what she feeds them when she has them and probably doesn't think there is anything wrong with this.
Occasionally, this wouldn't be that bad and would maybe be considered a treat -- but with Britney, you just know that this isnt the case, and this is probably the normal diet she feeds them.
Sunkist doesn't have vitamin C. Twelve oz has 190g of calories. Here are the ingredients:
* Carbonated water
* High fructose corn syrup and/or sugar
* Citric acid
* Sodium benzoate (preservative)
* Food starch-modified
* Natural flavors
* Caffeine
* Glycerol ester of wood rosin
* Ascorbic acid (preservative)
* Yellow 6
* Red 40
(Citric acid is a flavoring agent that is also used in cleaners, etc. Olympic connection: 50% of it worldwide is made in China.)
ubmitted by . on August 13, 2008 - 8:37pm.
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 13, 2008 - 8:30pm
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! The man objects to the tightness of the Hot Slut of the Day shirt on his wife?? On the other hand, good to know he agrees with the Hot Slut part!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
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♥♥ Yah, iz mah birfday beeeshes!!! ♥♥
LCT,
My insults are usually quite santized from what I really would like to say. ((winking furiously))
"YOU ODOR ELIMINATING ADHESIVE DEODORIZERS!"
As soon as I read this I said to self....hummmm. On the next visit to Home Depot, the garden center people are in big trouble!
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"Practically" is not an option when it comes to virginity.
Is that Brit's Sunkist or is Jayden drinking it?!! My 4 year old hasn't even TRIED soda yet! And do her kids have WHITE bread??
You'd think Brit would at least be smart enough to try to fake us out by feeding her kids fresh fruits and vegetables for ONE DAY when she knows it is being photographed for OK magazine!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I bought the Dlisted glow in the dark condoms and was very disappointed that they only say Dlis down the side when fully deployed.
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Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!
Peter: That's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk!
lol...at first i thought his pic was photoshopped. can't blame brit brit for liking soda...from time to time i shove a bag of cheetos up my mouth too. *runs and hides*
Submitted by DebFrmHell on August 13, 2008 - 8:39pm.
LCT,
Lordy...there is too many to choose from.
Starting with me on a bad day. 8-)
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You call people janitorial words?
Submitted by . on August 13, 2008 - 8:37pm.
Welllllllll, darling LTC. I hate, hate, HATE to say this but the shirt I ordered was a total BITCH to clean and the writing was a bit smudgy. I was kinda bummed really. I've not worn it since last year if that gives you any idea. Quality control, people, quality control. It was all cotton (which is what I prefer because poly/cotton makes me itchy) but the silk-screening or whatever was baddddddd.
I feel so bad saying that. -But, 2 out of 5 stars tops. The sizing was right though. I ordered a small and it fit me properly even though I should have ordered a medium so my bosoms didn't jutt out in such an obnoxious way. My husband said, "You are not going out with a t-shirt that tight around your tits that says hot slut of the day!" -And, that was the end of that. lol
All I can think of when I see SPF and JJ is the crying and consoling scene in the back of Britney's car. Gawd. That totally teared me up.
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Whew. Good to know. Looks like I'll be ordering the 'i eat glue' shirt instead. Hahaha about the husband's comment... why the hell else would you go outside with a shirt that said 'slut' on it if it wasn;t inappropriately hugging your tits?
I haaaaaate to say this but I play Final Fantasy. I'm ashamed.
I bought some earrings and some shoes. Shoes are comfortable and the shizz. The earrings were pretty if not the best quality, but they don't suck.
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Laissez le bon temps rouler!
I bought the tote bag and was happy with it, great for books.
LCT,
Lordy...there is too many to choose from.
Starting with me on a bad day. 8-)
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"Practically" is not an option when it comes to virginity.