Is This Jennifer Aniston's New Piece?
Jennifer Aniston's fartytale romance with John Mayer has come to end, but she's already back at it. According to The Sun, Jenny has been seen with 28-year-old model Matt Felker. Matt used to bump it with Selma Blair. He was also in Brit Brit's video for "Toxic."
Never date dudes who are prettier than you. They usually smell better than you too. I dated a dude once who was so pretty that he always smelled like fresh gardenias. I couldn't explain it. Even after he showered. That's probably what Zac Efron smells like. No, he smells like CoverGirl foundation, baby powder and John Travolta drool. Matt Felker smells like Cheetos, summer rain and cocoa butter.
Hopefully, Jenny is just using this dude to fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away until you get pains in your chocha. That didn't make sense, but I'm not feeling well, so bare with me.
In other old maid news, The Chicago Sun-Times reports that Jenny is the one who called off her relationshp with John Mayer! It wasn't the other way around. Jenny got sick of John cheating on her ass and she allowed him three fuck-ups.
Apparently, John effed a cocktail waitress and a promoter's assistant for his tour. His third strike came when he did grossy grossy times with a groupie. A source added, "Jen who decided to move on. She is very fond of John and has thought he might be the one. She finds him funny, sexy and very talented. ... Plus he understands all the aspects of living in a fishbowl. But in the final analysis, she just got tired of his roving eye."
Since when is Jenny writing for The Chicago Sun-Times?
"There's a difference between being single, and being alone!"
Well said, Willona Woods.(Good Times)
Submitted by K2 on August 14, 2008 - 9:09am.
I'm curious. Why is it that someone like Cameron Diaz who had a long term relationship with Matt Dillion and Justine Timberlake, has never been married, and dates guys left and right is not considered desperate, hard up, and clingy but someone like Jen who experienced a divorce and is just trying to get back into the dating groove is labeled all these things?
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Word!
If this story is true he's a vast improvement in the looks department than JM, however I think MK got it right, he is far too pretty for her.
John Mayer is disgusting. I can't wait until the day his dick falls off.
☠
"That was the most ludicrous pack of verbal peanut butter buttfuck I have ever read." ~DebFrmHell
http://www.myspace.com/zoloftpony
eyeroll,
My comment could be affiliated with anyone, not just someone famous. You proved my point by calling angelina a bitch, have you met her to justify calling her a bitch? And as far as jennifer's looks, i don't recall mentioning you specifically! I was refering to people, mainly women who call jennifer (chinnifer) and make other childish remarks about her features. So what jennifer has a big chin, alot of female actresses have prominate facial features, but are considered attractive. I just think the manner in which people criticize (in general) at times is childish as well as associated with jealousy and unjustified hate.
Why do I have a feeling she picked him for his good genes?
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. --Dr. Seuss
Yawwwwwwn. You know she'll try to get him to settle down with her, while failing to notice him chasing the asses of half the women around.
Seriously if you had to wake up to that face, wouldn't YOU leave?
Well im a man and i dont like her face.
so put that in your mop bucket and slap my sally sack jack!
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I guess different strokes for different folks. My husband thinks Jen has a hot little body and claims he'd "do her in a minute". lol. When asked about Jolie, he just makes that face like he just threw up in his mouth a little bit. From a male perspective he finds her tatts to be disgusting, she's skeletor and her forehead is too big. I guess he's too busy looking at Jen's ass to notice her chin. But the word he used best to describe Jolie was SLUT. Yeah, some people just find that anyone who contributes to the dissolution of a marriage is revolting. He even threw Julia Roberts on that list! harsh.
Submitted by VMDA78 on August 14, 2008 - 12:25pm.
I am not very religious. I'm amazed at the hatred people have for someone they have never met. With so much hatred in the world, why do people feel the need to contribute. The hatred exceeds normal logic.
I do not hate Jennifer Anistona and I am not obsessed with Angelina Jolie. I can't stand the bitch, however, I am amazed at the idiocy that would cause you to say that:
1) people who criticise Aniston's looks are jealous (I happen to think she is very attractive)
and
2) because we think your comment is stupid and simplistic that we must be obsessed with Angelina Jolie.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
You are not thinking straight.
should I put this as my siggie?
HI! My name is Kirk! Im not an Angelina fan! Praise Jesus!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Submitted by VMDA78 on August 14, 2008 - 3:25pm.
well if shit like that blows your mind i do pitty you come tax season!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Submitted by VMDA78 on August 14, 2008 - 12:19pm.
What is your friggin' point.
Right, cuz if you don't like Jenifer Aniston you HAVE TO be obsessed with Angelina Jolie
it's not about them...it's about you!
shut the fuck up with your preaching and your black and white simplistic pronouncements
this came out of east jesus nowhere.
how did this thread become a remake
of one flew over the cuckoo's nest?
all that matter is matt is hawt.
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"I love fast and I love hard."-MK
I am not very religious. I'm amazed at the hatred people have for someone they have never met. With so much hatred in the world, why do people feel the need to contribute. The hatred exceeds normal logic.
IN NOT A FUCKING ANGELINA FAN FUCK NUT!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
What is your friggin' point. You must be one of angelina's obsessed fans. Brad once said during an interview that over zealous brangelina fans "they need help" i agree 100 000 000%.
Submitted by VMDA78 on August 14, 2008 - 12:05pm.
envy is one of the deadly sins.
Church Lady in da house
woot woot woot.
Submitted by VMDA78 on August 14, 2008 - 3:05pm.
Well im a man and i dont like her face.
so put that in your mop bucket and slap my sally sack jack!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
People like to trash jennifer's looks, she must be doing something right in order to be attracting handsome men. Females' who trash jennifer for her looks are jealous, and envy is one of the deadly sins.
Submitted by capturinglife on August 14, 2008 - 2:37pm.
lol
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NO I'M NOT HISPANIC I'M JUST A CRAZY CHICK HENCE CHICA LOCA ANYWAY TO THE IDIOTS IF YOU DON'T LIKE WHAT I SAY BOO HOO SCROLL DOWN TO THE NEXT COMMENT & TO THE PROFESSORS THAT LIKE TO TELL US WE CAN'T SPELL KISS OUR....
"Never date dudes who are prettier than you. They usually smell better than you too."
Actually I've heard Brad Pitt smells terrible! LOL!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Maybe when men own up to being DEFECTIVE in this society they will stop putting the blame on women and attacking them for being lesbians/ugly etc when few decent men exist out there to be captured :)
I bow before her if it's true. She wins and is my new hero. ;)
Blah blah blah another day, another lie from an imaginary insider who supposely know all about jennifer's life. These stories crack me up
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NO I'M NOT HISPANIC I'M JUST A CRAZY CHICK HENCE CHICA LOCA ANYWAY TO THE IDIOTS IF YOU DON'T LIKE WHAT I SAY BOO HOO SCROLL DOWN TO THE NEXT COMMENT & TO THE PROFESSORS THAT LIKE TO TELL US WE CAN'T SPELL KISS OUR....
I don't think it's such a bad thing to serial date. You can be a giant ass like JLO and get married 47 times or you can skip the marriage license and have some fun. If I were a wealthy actress I would never get married and I would have a revolving door in my bedroom. My first victim would be George Strait!
I'm amused by some of the comments. For those who assume she's jumping from relationship to relationship. It's from fuck to fuck ya'll. And wasn't she single for a bit after Vince? I don't think Jen has a problem being single.
Look at this guy. He's hot. Who wouldn't tap that ass?
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http://cocoacritic.blogspot.com
As for Skeletina, we all know she is just trying to justify being a professional immoral fucktard.
(sorry to bring youknowwho up)
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Thank you, I was hoping you'd throw me a bone! lol
I think the way dumbass went on and on about welcoming a little pow wow with Jen was absurd. She helped in the break up of the marriage but then was arrogant enough to think she was above it all and would be glad to have a heart to heart with Jen. She's a douche bag.... don't get me started.
I am not sure, but I think it may have something to do with all the blowjobs that Angelina Jolie gives to the tabloid editors.
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LMAO! that was very good. so true so true.
Well DUH !!!! i knew edward scissor hands wasn't for her. He's a douche.
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 14, 2008 - 11:39am.
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I am not sure, but I think it may have something to do with all the blowjobs that Angelina Jolie gives to the tabloid editors.
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I have been saving my change to buy a pair of those leggings with knee pads for AJ 'cause
I would hate to see her wittle nees looking so ashy and calloused....
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"Practically" is not an option when it comes to virginity.
Matty is delicious.
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"I love fast and I love hard."-MK
Why is she dating her long lost twin brother?
looks like a young brad pitt. she fucked up royaly.
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Blogs aren't for the sensitive at heart - FU
I'm NOT an economist, I'm an optimist. GW Bush
Submitted by K2 on August 14, 2008 - 9:09am.
I'm curious. Why is it that someone like Cameron Diaz who had a long term relationship with Matt Dillion and Justine Timberlake, has never been married, and dates guys left and right is not considered desperate, hard up, and clingy but someone like Jen who experienced a divorce and is just trying to get back into the dating groove is labeled all these things?
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I am not sure, but I think it may have something to do with all the blowjobs that Angelina Jolie gives to the tabloid editors.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
It's like a jungle sometimes it makes me wonder
How I keep from going under
K2 on August 14, 2008 - 12:32pm
Oh I know, like I posted, I don't hate her. It's individual perception, in a general sense.
As for Skeletina, we all know she is just trying to justify being a professional immoral fucktard.
(sorry to bring youknowwho up)
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Submitted by DebFrmHell on August 14, 2008 - 1:00pm.
Yesh, and that's what makes it especially painful. *slings her arm around your shoulder* But we are strong wimmenz! *flexes like Rosie the Riveter* We can DOOOO eet!
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Hi5.
My final straw with jennypoo was when her friends like Katherine Keener would speak for her and she would sit smugly and let them.
She has never really postured herself as a strong woman. The Oprah pity parties didn't help either.
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The Oprah pity party? I'm sorry but I just don't see it that way. She was on the show - can't really remember why, but it was probably PR for her movie "The Break Up" that was coming out. And of course people are going to bring up the marriage (especially Oprah - she'll drag your past out in front of the world and you won't even realize it's happening). For Oprah it would be like not addressing the big f*cking elephant in the room. She didn't drone on and on about it. And she certainly didn't attack her ex. As for her friends coming to her defense, well again I don't see anything wrong with it. If I was humiliated as much as she was, I'd hope for the support and protectiveness from my friends and family. When David Arquette was on Howard Stern and Jen's marriage was brought up - David spoke out on her behalf but certainly was not coached by Jen to say certain things. The public wanted to know what happened - maybe Jen felt she had nothing to hide. Whereas Brad never addressed the topic in the past 3 years - but let Jolie do it for him. HOW many times has that woman brought up Jen in interviews? This was Jen's marriage - why shouldn't she be allowed to discuss it? NOT everyone acts like Jackie O and turns a blind eye to her husbands infidelities. Jen spoke of it twice - on oprah and vanity fair. Then it was done. The media has kept this circus going. But we can agree to disagree.
Thanks Martha,
**nuzzles up**
But really, I think everyone who has been in that situation always has it somewhere in the back of their head, regardless how good the new mate is, that something might go wrong. Kind of a self- fulfilling prophesy, as it were.
Reminds me of a song:
I said that's life, and as funny as it may seem
Some people get their kicks,
Stompin' on a dream
But I don't let it, let it get me down,
'Cause this fine ol' world it keeps spinning around
I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate,
A poet, a pawn and a king.
I've been up and down and over and out
And I know one thing:
Each time I find myself, flat on my face,
I pick myself up and get back in the race.
aaah, Frank Sinatra...
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"Practically" is not an option when it comes to virginity.
Submitted by DebFrmHell on August 14, 2008 - 12:21pm.
I had a cheater BF that I was with for 5 years. Long time ago (95) we broke up. To this day I still have trust issues.
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That's a tough situation. :( Been there and done that, m'dear. *patpats*
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Hi5.
K2 on August 14, 2008 - 12:09pm
My final straw with jennypoo was when her friends like Katherine Keener would speak for her and she would sit smugly and let them.
She has never really postured herself as a strong woman. The Oprah pity parties didn't help either.
Now, I don't hate her and she tends to ignore the press more so now but when she really needed to kind of step up she didn't, this is all still residual reaction methinks.
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
I'm curious. Why is it that someone like Cameron Diaz who had a long term relationship with Matt Dillion and Justine Timberlake, has never been married, and dates guys left and right is not considered desperate, hard up, and clingy but someone like Jen who experienced a divorce and is just trying to get back into the dating groove is labeled all these things? The same can be said for Drew Barrymore. These chics are like confirmed bachelorettes and never get tossed into the media like this. Despite what many may believe (about Jen), she doesn't appear to be pining away for her ex's like some of you think. I think she's a strong woman and that makes some people (who are not) a little uncomfortable. rant over.
Submitted by Clarisse on August 14, 2008 - 11:39am.
Riddle me this...
Aniston with a different guy every week =
sad loser that can't keep a man
K Hudson with a different guy every week = slut who is man-like in her turn-over mate rate
MEH.
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Man who is with a different girl every week=A wanted STUD who nobody questions or cares.
Go figure!
Good for her! Maybe now all the hate mongers will STFU about how desperate she is. Give her credit, she's not about to compromise her own well being for the sake of being with a man. Kudos to her. She gave it a chance, still believes in love but knows when to pull the plug. I like the fact that she isn't willing to settle no matter how many kids her ex has!
Better to be alone than in bad company. But why would she have expected that John Mayer would be faithful? Even wimpy rock stars have a problem with loyalty to one female.
"Society sooner or later must return to its lost leader,the cultured and fascinating liar. . ."
Oscar Wilde
If she was smart she'd start dating really young hotties. Just draw them in with her fame and fortune, get them to escort her to events, massages *ahem*, whatever...and keep going through them until she's got some kinda Sugar Mommy thing going on. Yeah, baby, that's the ticket.
♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
I can only find pictures of the girl twin.
Why would she even try to one-up the Pitt, he is so happy that rainbows glow in his eyes. She is far luckier than her ex and she knows it, probably found out she likes dick, good for her, just make it safe.
OMG, he looks so handsome. Just saw his profile on millionaire dating site """"""""""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""""""" " last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship he is looking for on that site. Is he single now? Just curious!
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Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on August 14, 2008 - 11:29am.
Submitted by TT99 on August 14, 2008 - 11:25am.
Oh, Jen! Why do you insist on getting with guys who are clearly hotter than you?
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She wants to attempt to create spawn cuter than Shiloh.
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Me thinks that is an awesome goal to have in life!!
"Since when is Jenny writing for The Chicago Sun-Times?"
My sentiments exactly! We wouldn't have even known they were an item and now broken up if Jennifer's publicist didn't constantly put out minute by minute stories about it. :P
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'Cause we all just wanna be big rock stars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars...
-Nickelback, "Rockstar"
I had a cheater BF that I was with for 5 years. Long time ago (95) we broke up. To this day I still have trust issues...
After Bad BF, men I would see...I'd either dump them if they get too close or keep them at arms lenght until they go away.
Life ain't always simple.
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"Practically" is not an option when it comes to virginity.