Thursday, August 14th 2008

He Should Have Kept That To Himself


Legendary pepaw Ernest Borgnine was on Fox & Friends and they asked him what's his secret to looking so young. He giggled a little and then whispered it to the dude next to him. It was a whisper we all heard.

Ernest softly said, "I masturbate a lot." Great. Just what I needed. The sexy image of Pepaw Ernest rubbing on his shriveled turtle head while watching "Murder She Wrote." Do you think he cums dust?

VIA KISS Nation

Posted by: Michael K


It's good to see that some people don't lose their sense of humor with age. And then there are those who never had one to begin with, and couldn't find one if it were hiding under the sofa. Or their zippers . . .

Good on yer, Ernie - you've just exposed the priggish twits more than yourself.

littlebitofsunshine's picture

Funny! Well I don't know if it will keep you younger, but you'll smile a lot more :)

NonnyMouse's picture

Are you kidding? This is the most awesome thing in the history of things. Ol' Ernie punked Fox.

Or maybe one letter off that.

can't wait until you are older and see how you feel about youngsters telling you that you are no longer allowed to touch your weiner because it's grossing them out.

ploppsicle's picture

ahahah dust!

Mrs.Kravitz's picture

I masturbate a lot too and I don't look a day over 75.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
It's like a jungle sometimes it makes me wonder
How I keep from going under

kbug's picture

Thanks a fuckin' lot MK, I just ate. Wanna see my broasted chicken? It's there on the floor.

TOPANGA's picture

AHAHAHAH that's some funny sh**!

*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****

StewieGriffin's picture

mmmm...that's kinda hot. Forgive, I know not what I say.

MollyJones's picture

Ew that was mega creepy!
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"I'm the normal one and everyone else is crazy. Thank you, next question" -Kathy Griffin

Devore's picture

marty is like, one of the greatest movies of all time.

Oh Mikey K, that's the best laff I've had all day. Aren't you the clever one?

I thought it was freakin hilarious. It's good to see people not take things too seriously sometimes.
He could've easily have given some bullshit answer, like eating right, blahblahblah :P

Stock Broker's picture

Old people confuse easily.

Cinna's picture

I guess JT didn't bring sexy back afterall! Looks like Grampa Borgnine had it all along...

Wasn't he on "Old Man and the Sea?" I am wondering now what he did for all those days looking for that big fish!

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"I just want to wet her lips and stick her to something." ~ Man Of The Year (about Angelina Ho-Lee)

www.myspace.com/cinnaburst_1976

TT99's picture

I can so vivdly imagine Angela Landsbury solving the murder at the end of the show and Ernest Oldnine cumming dust from the excitement of the case. I can't get it out of my head. I don't think I'll sleep tonight.
___________________________________________________________________
"I was hoping to dress something like Prince. But toned down, as if he were going to the zoo, or the supermarket." - Jemaine Clement

Madam Pince's picture

Keep some secrets for your old age, Ernie.

In other news, Fox News is forced to admit to right-wing fundamentalists all over the USA: yes, masturbation does occur, it doesn't make you go blind or lose your mind, and sometimes the person practicing it actually becomes such a success in life that he appears on Fox News.

***********************************************************

"You don't remember the motorcycle gang? Doing the striptease in front of them at the bar? The iguana? Good God, man. Tell me you remember the iguana!"

snowpiece's picture

Green Is Good: he has a book out, a bio I guess. LOL at the end the interviwer goes, "i just shook his hand!" LMAO
****************************1/20/09
"WHO THE FUCK CARES WHORE!!
GET A JOB..THERE IS AN OPENING IN THE BURGER KING IN OHIO IF YOU CAN CONTROL YOURSELF FROM BATHING IN THE SINK." stan hooper

We are reading a lot of fake news these days. Did you remember the news about Britney's pregnancy, Lindsay's joining on the famous rich men seeking affairs """"""C e l e b C u p i d.c o m""""""""? Is this news true or not? who knows...

DESIGNER GENES's picture

AH HA HA HA HA. so dirty, so wrong! Go 'head Ernie, good to see you've got the kung fu grip still in your twilight years. Arthritis be damned!
^^^
the poster formerly known as jammer

Green Is Good's picture

Submitted by loozer on August 14, 2008 - 10:27am.

Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 14, 2008 - 10:13am.
Submitted by Green Is Good on August 14, 2008 - 10:11am.
Wow, we watched "The Poseidon Adventure" last night! Ha ha ha!

Mike Rogo: "Linda, next time you put something on, like I told you to put on!"

Classic!

---------------------------

I love that movie.

My all-time favorite movie!!!

Mike Rogo: You better watch your language, Preacher. You sound like you come from the slum or something.
Linda Rogo: You son-of-a-bitch! Go help him!

***************************************************

Another classic scene:

Nurse Gina Rowe: They're suppositories Mr Rogo. You don't swallow them.

Mike Rogo: Then what the hell do you do with them?

Linda Rogo: For Christ's sake! I know what to do with suppositories. Just get them outta here!

DonkeyPunched's picture

THAT WAS FUCKING PRECIOUS!!!!

Genevieve's picture

Ahhhh old peepaws need some lovin too.
____________
People Suck!

loozer's picture

That is the secret to a long life? I may live forever.

*************************************************
When tryin' to untangle
The Jingle from the Jangle
It's easy if you listen with your heart.
Sing Me, Sing Me, Sing Me...

ImpertinentVixen's picture

Submitted by Green Is Good on August 14, 2008 - 9:11am.
Wow, we watched "The Poseidon Adventure" last night! Ha ha ha!

Mike Rogo: "Linda, next time you put something on, like I told you to put on!"

Classic!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This movie is so quotable. My husband and I are always saying, "You killed MY LINDA!"

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"What? Salma was supposed to stuff her melonitas into a million-dollar wedding dress and marry that rich bitch without a prenup." - MK 07/18/08

loozer's picture

Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 14, 2008 - 10:13am.
Submitted by Green Is Good on August 14, 2008 - 10:11am.
Wow, we watched "The Poseidon Adventure" last night! Ha ha ha!

Mike Rogo: "Linda, next time you put something on, like I told you to put on!"

Classic!

---------------------------

I love that movie.

My all-time favorite movie!!!

Mike Rogo: You better watch your language, Preacher. You sound like you come from the slum or something.
Linda Rogo: You son-of-a-bitch! Go help him!

*************************************************
When tryin' to untangle
The Jingle from the Jangle
It's easy if you listen with your heart.
Sing Me, Sing Me, Sing Me...

NovaNightly's picture

Good for you pepaw Ernest!!!! Tell it like it is!!

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip 'em the bird.

Green Is Good's picture

Y'know, he DOES look good. Ernest is 91 years-old!

Anybody know why he was on this show? Was he promoting a new movie?

We need a Hot Pepaw of the Week category.

angel_i's picture

I think old peeps getting sexay is hot. I don't know why, I just do. I just realized that I prefer it on old men, tho. Still no clue as to why.

♥ ThreadKilla! / Lean Like a Chola / She's a Lady.
I can only find pictures of the girl twin.

TheBreakdown's picture

I think in abuot 20 more years, when there are more people over 65 than under 30, you will see a shift in attitude regarding senior citizens getting their panty pudding patted.

Long live senior citizen sluts!

'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

Submitted by Green Is Good on August 14, 2008 - 10:11am.
Wow, we watched "The Poseidon Adventure" last night! Ha ha ha!

Mike Rogo: "Linda, next time you put something on, like I told you to put on!"

Classic!

---------------------------

I love that movie.

*******************************************************
Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron

FatMartha's picture

Submitted by Salem13 on August 14, 2008 - 11:38am.
Ugh masturbating is a lot of work sometimes maybe I'm really lazy.
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LOL I am giggling like an idiot, not because what you said was ridonculous (even though it was) but because it's true. Hehehehe.

And hello to my fellow Hoos-whore in this thread! xP
************
Hi5.

Green Is Good's picture

Wow, we watched "The Poseidon Adventure" last night! Ha ha ha!

Mike Rogo: "Linda, next time you put something on, like I told you to put on!"

Classic!

***************************************************

WISH GRANTED! >:)
myspace.com/draya23

soul's picture

yes be proud Ernie! you still got it. :)

..O/O..

Salem13's picture

Ugh masturbating is a lot of work sometimes maybe I'm really lazy.

Fucking_Classy's picture

Seriously, I have no problem with old folks bumbing nasties or beating off, but Jesus, keep it to yourselves!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
" Jesus can see everything I do... and he's going to beat me brainless!"

aquarius's picture

Oh man, I didn't realize he was married to Tova... that hot slut is on some good shit! She's almost as good as the Quacker Factory lady.

I remember when Gloria Stuart (the old ho from Titanic) said that she masturbates all the time and that there's nothing wrong with it. No, there isn't, but it doesn't mean I want to hear about it!

FatMartha's picture

MK!!!! Shame on you! You KNOW that a lot of us read your bloggy during our lunch break [and all the time in between]. I have completely lost my appetite now!

Anyways, I think it's kind of adorable in a creepy way. Sort of how people in nursing homes bump a lot.
************
Hi5.

Fucking_Classy's picture

Damn, I have no problem in seeing videos and pictures of all kinds of disgusting things, even while eating, but just the THOUGHT of an old man wanking makes me sick.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
" Jesus can see everything I do... and he's going to beat me brainless!"

LOVE CARROTTOP's picture

Submitted by Suki on August 14, 2008 - 10:58am.

Do you think he cums dust?
-------------------

I think he cums a brown fountain of prune juice and Metamucil.

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I got attitude in my horse pills!

Clarisse's picture

oH that's just wrong!!

Okie! Hold me.

*gently rocks back in forth in the corner*

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My dreams about him usually leave me reaching for a baby wipe and a cigarette, if I ain't being too sublte. -Michael K

Cooch.Roue's picture

Hmm...ancient old white man saying senile things on Fox News. Maybe he can run for President!

~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~
I’m like an American princess. - Paris Hilton

I have things no heiress has. I've done it all on my own. Like a hustler. - Paris Hilton

LOVE CARROTTOP's picture

Submitted by oklahoma on August 14, 2008 - 10:50am.

Ain't that the truth, LCT, ain't that the truth!!!

*calls for maid to clean up LCT's vomit*
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You might need a dustpan for all my inside parts that came out too.

Morning sweetcheeks!

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I got attitude in my horse pills!

Angelina Jolie-Pitt's picture

Well we get that urge when we are young boys and it just doesnt go away!

My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.

Suki's picture

Do you think he cums dust?

AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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Just don't feed the gayelles! They eat enough of each other.---MK 8/5/2008

TheBreakdown's picture

Oh please!

If I am lucky enough to reach his age, I plan on having sexy times as much as possible.

At least there is no VIDEO of his actions!

Or perhaps I spoke too soon?!

'Heaux Confessionals'
www.myspace.com/triston

Your Mom Ate the Taco's picture

*fanning Okie*
I'm surprised the guy can still get it up.

*******************************************************
Sorrow is knowledge, those that know the most must mourn the deepest, the tree of knowledge is not the tree of life. -- Lord Byron

snowpiece's picture

why MK, just why?
OMG guys look at the hottie in the ads saying, go ahead touch me, LOL
****************************1/20/09
"WHO THE FUCK CARES WHORE!!
GET A JOB..THERE IS AN OPENING IN THE BURGER KING IN OHIO IF YOU CAN CONTROL YOURSELF FROM BATHING IN THE SINK." stan hooper

mike's picture

His secret is Tovah Borgnine. Ever seen her shill her shit on the Home Shopping Network (I don't watch the Home Shopping Network, but I've seen the clips on The Soup)? That's Hot Slut material right there.

itsjustme's picture

Mermaid Man NOOOOOOO!