Tuesday, August 19th 2008
Why Did They Cover Up His Hot Body?!
The king of all humans, Michael Phelps, shot this Sports Illustrated cover on Sunday night in China. The issue will already be on newsstands tomorrow. Those bitches are quick!
This is what I don't understand. Why would they cover up his hot body?! That shit is his real gold medal! I mean, they really should have just wrapped the gold medals around the top of his head instead. Hide the flaws and show us what we really want to see! On second thought, they should have just hung the gold medals from his golden peen. And I'm not joking. His peen is probably made of gold.
Here's the inspiration for Phelps' SI cover. Mark Spitz took this iconic image back in 1972. Spitz's version wins. Sorry. It's all about the pornstache.
VIA Cover Awards
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Mark Spitz will always be the Olympic champion...he is incredibly handsome and sexy, and still is! I think Michael is UGLY and his body is
weird. And I believe that Michael didn't win the race against Cavic....it was a stolen gold medal!! Cheater. Mark Spitz was always way ahead of everyone in all his races, not like fuggly Michael Phelps. Mark Spitz was the FIRST and ONLY winner. And Mark is HOT!!
i thought phelps was wearing a nice summer blouse before i scrolled down and saw they were gold medals. a blouse would have looked nicer on him....
Mr. Phelps is HAWT. The rest of youse guyses need GLASSES bitches.
I'd be really depressed if Phelps had a hot face, because then I'd think, "Damn you, Mother Nature! It's not fair to give one person everything!" Okay, arguably, maybe Zac Efron is that person. Anyhoo, this dude's face is...umm...phew. Well, not hot. Not hot at all.
why so much lipstick?
he kinda has a Screech look to his face....poor thing
I'm glad to see him succeed and I will be using him as a role model for my ADHD nephew!! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
how YOU doin'?
Ummmm.....his Adam's apple looks like an upside-down clit. No?
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Gentlemen... start your boners.
poor baby !lol! this picture is so unfortunate but i have to cut him some slack...he is ONLY 23 years old and dispite all of his accomplishments he isn't nearly as prepared to handle all the fame and fortune that's coming his way! the media and hollywood like to chew up celebs/stars/famous people and spit them out. one day he's America's golden boy and the next he's a douche/ugly/overexposed idiot...i think that's sad..he's spent his whole life working toward a goal that most people wouldn't even consider much less have the ability to obtain and instead of celebrating his achievements he's being picked on!
that being said i HATE the arrangement of the medals. my first thought was "why is he wearing a DRESS" LOL...
tu ne cede malis sed contra audentior ito
Give him another gold medal. A gold medal for FUG.
Seriously, looking at him makes me retch.
He might be an amazing swimmer, but I see now why my hubby is always going on about how ugly he is. *shudder*.
He and I would never make it as a couple, but I'd fuck that hot body of his six ways 'til Sunday.
'Never mess with a chick with lip liner, no lipstick'
Submitted by peaches on August 19, 2008 - 1:05pm.
I heard his classmates bullied him, and his mom put him into swimming as a way for him to be able to learn structure.
In an interview a couple of days ago, he said that he got bullied a lot. A guy that used to bully him asked if Phelps remembered him (after the 1st Olympics) and Phelps told the guy that he didn't remember him. Phelps said of course he DID remember that guy making his life hell, but wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of knowing that..
Submitted by peaches on August 19, 2008 - 10:05am.
his mom put him into swimming as a way for him to be able to learn structure.
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His coach took one look at his physique (Phelps was 11 at the time) and said BINGO, this guy was BORN to win swimming races.
True story.
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LoLo come back--
You can blame it all on me
I was wrong
And I just can't live without you!♫
He is not CUTE! Unless you are into apes! I don't get the appeal.
Oh and mark is seriously rockin the supa fly, pimp daddy gold chains. soooo freakin 70's! but hay i was born in the 70's which is why i'm so crazy. a crazy 70's baby!
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lizzieb on August 16, 2008 - 9:05am.
The sad thing is that Madge would look good for 50 if she stopped trying to look 35. And ate a few pies, drank a few pints and had a laugh. I don't know why we get so upset about aging when the al
I too must be in the minority cuz I find him cute but I'll admit this is a baaad picture. LOL at it looking like he's wearing a halter top..so true.
As far as the Blohan thing, I'm pretty sure he said it after the 2004 Olympics, back when she was actually pretty and seemed like a relatively normal person.
Congrads to Michael Phelps and his family. and my mom said mark spitz had a bad attitude and was very arrogant.
pornstach. MK your the best. i wonder why Putz perez hilton has a tv show and you don't? you more than deserve your own show.
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lizzieb on August 16, 2008 - 9:05am.
The sad thing is that Madge would look good for 50 if she stopped trying to look 35. And ate a few pies, drank a few pints and had a laugh. I don't know why we get so upset about aging when the al
My sister had the Mark Spitz poster on her door when we were kids back in the '70s. God I'm old.
Wow I am so in the minority here! I get a boner every time I see Michael Phelps! I don't care if his face is less than handsome, I WANT HIS BOD! Several times over. I'm dying to know what's beneath those speedos. YES I'm QUITE ILL IN THE HEAD, THANK YOU!
I have never seen a picture of Mark Spitz before,and one night about two weeks ago, I had a dream that THIS dude was doing the sexy to me!!I recognize the mustache!!!!!
WOW.Does that mean I'm psychic?
Submitted by stake_spike on August 19, 2008 - 12:52pm.
At first I didn't realize those were medals I thought he was wearing a halter top.
I was also thinking the same Cover Up His Face Instead! The public does not need to see that! At least stick a swim cap on him. It makes him look less "unfortunate".
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LOL I thought the same thing at first!
It's really sad that this guy is so fug. I guess you can't have it all
Also, I didn't watch him too closely... but he looks like he's hung like a horse. It usually comes with that body type...
Good looks and intelligence aside, Michael is set for life now. Big corporations will be fighting to get his endorsement... and the bimbos will be flinging themselves at him.
Not a bad life!
At first I didn't realize those were medals I thought he was wearing a halter top.
I was also thinking the same Cover Up His Face Instead! The public does not need to see that! At least stick a swim cap on him. It makes him look less "unfortunate".
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"Oh lord, please help our athletes bring home the gold, enough gold so we can melt it down and buy back our economy from the Chinese". - Stephen Colbert
Awww, he's so unfortunate looking.
Not into it at all.
Of course there is no law saying these dudes have to be hot, it would increase my viewing of these events however, just sayin'.
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Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Submitted by Dirk Diggler on August 19, 2008 - 11:14am.
Michael Phelps sure can swim, but he's ugly and does not sound very bright.
I hear he has major ADD, that might be why he doesn't sound smart, but he preobably really isn't that dumb. Sometimes people with ADD are good at somethings, yet not others. I heard his classmates bullied him, and his mom put him into swimming as a way for him to be able to learn structure. Those Bullies will probably try to be his friend now so they can try to ask him to pay for the second mortgage on their trailor home! lol!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Here's Mark Spitz today. Still 1000 times hotter than butterdoofus:
http://i.a.cnn.net/money/galleries/2007/moneymag/0702/gallery.pop_icons....
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"What? Salma was supposed to stuff her melonitas into a million-dollar wedding dress and marry that rich bitch without a prenup." - MK 07/18/08
spitz was HOT. phelps is NOT. looks like he just rode in on the short bus.
Man, he is so fucking UGLY! Enough with that overrated spaz!
great swimmer, great body, very funny looking face. oh well, god giveth, god taketh away.
but being ugly hasnt hurt his career at all & he is going to be soooo rich his face still wont pose any inconvenience for him.
ok put Mark's head on Michaels bod. ;;))
all that glitters is gold, bravo!
;) :) :O =) :p :( :\ :D
My sister had that Mark Spitz poster in her room. I used to just go in there and stare at it. It was actually a full-bodied, real sized picture.
Someone posted a link to it below.
and one more ugly that's sexy -- remember Peter Greene -- the guy who buttraped whatsit in Pulp Fiction? yeah, like to audition in his pants, too:
http://www.facets.org/images/phil_images/cleanshaven.jpg
Submitted by elegantlady on August 19, 2008 - 9:50am.
That grill is rough!
Phelps is rough in the mug. OMG, it would have to be pitch black, a canvas bag over the head and duct tape over his mouth so I'm not reminded of the monstrosity from which the voice comes.
Damn...what a waste of a tight body to be attached to that face.
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ah, if I'd scrolled on your comment before, I wouldn't have bothered with mine, because it's poetic and right on! I can totally hear this sad fucker braying like a donkey when he cums.... and ew.
peaches
Right? SamRo is gearing up for the cock block of her lezzie life. For Realzz!!
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 19, 2008 - 12:05pm.
Leatherette,
Howard Stern?
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uuuummmmmm, maybe ...
*slumping reeeeal low in shame now*
OMFG!!! I just realized!! White Oprah is going to milk this shit for all it's worth!!! Michael Lohan will probably say he'd rather she date Phelps than Samantha because he's a guy or something, but you know White Oprah isn't going to shut the fuck up about this!!!!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Leatherette,
Howard Stern?
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Nervenzusammenbruch
SamRo must totally hate him right now!!! With Lindsay's history, I'd be pretty worried if I were her!!!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Submitted by Voice of Reason on August 19, 2008 - 9:44am.
Why does he look like he's wearing a Versace halter top?
Mark Spitz was so hot. I saw him in person once about a year after he won his medals, and yummm. I wonder what he looks like today?
I saw him on the news, they've been interviewing him. He has a full head of white hair, and no more mustach. I saw a documentry about the munich '73 olympics and the israeli athletes that were murdered, they went into overdrive to protect Spitz because of him being Jewish. I think he had won his seven medals already a few days before it happened, and they sent him home to protect him.
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
"My vagina is really confused about what to do with a body like that attached to a head like Andre the Giant's."
*keels over and dies of laughter* Oh god I love you guys so much. Hahahahahaha.
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Hi5.
Why would he want to meet Hohan? Didn't he get the muff diver memo?
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Submitted by peaches on August 19, 2008 - 11:57am.
Submitted by Stock Broker on August 19, 2008 - 11:17am.
I can see him doing the party circuit with the rest of the celebutards
ugh!! If he starts going to the Playboy Mansion, he should be stripped of his medals!!!
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AND he should be stripped of his CONDOMS, so he can suffer the wrath of dick-eating parishiltonastaphylococcus.
If you scroll down without getting to the actual gold medal it kinda looks like he is wearing a chicks bathing suit. I wonder what he will do after this. Will he try to beat his own record at the next olympics or is that it, would kinda be dissapointing if he returns at the next olympics and he isnt 8 for 8.
"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car. "
OMG I didn't realise the guy had speed brakes for ears, YIKES!!
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
oh yeah -- not so scary either: Al Pacino, HOTNESS.
Submitted by Stock Broker on August 19, 2008 - 11:17am.
I can see him doing the party circuit with the rest of the celebutards
ugh!! If he starts going to the Playboy Mansion, he should be stripped of his medals!!!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on August 19, 2008 - 11:51am.
Submitted by Leatherette on August 19, 2008 - 8:48am.
I know what you mean, doll.
In your humble opinion, who is hardcore UGLY, and in a sexy way?
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I take it you passed on yesterday's Kanye West post?
... so yeah, KAWN-YAY as well as Benicio Del Toro and Vincent D'Onofrio from Law & Order... I'll spare you the scarier ones for now ;)
Submitted by sparkys nemesis on August 19, 2008 - 9:46am.
Noooo, 'staches are for losers! Don't even suggest a cookie duster for Phelps.
yes two things that totally creep me out, 'staches and Clowns!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Submitted by radio siren on August 19, 2008 - 10:15am.
The "wow" factor really went down with this guy when when he said he'd love to meet Blohan because he thinks she's really HAWT. *barf*
What!!! Are you serious!!? I'm sure SamRo is thrilled about that!!! With Lindsay's history, She will fuck phelps. Sam, please keep your girl under control!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Submitted by Leatherette on August 19, 2008 - 8:48am.
I know what you mean, doll.
In your humble opinion, who is hardcore UGLY, and in a sexy way?
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Nervenzusammenbruch