10 Minutes Of Torture
When I was like 12 or 13, my friends and I would spend our weekends making our own music videos in the garage with my mom's camcorder. Our stupid videos were only entertaining to us. I showed my mom once and she said, "That's nice. Don't break the camera." Well, Heidi Montag's new video makes my old shit look like the Citizen Kane of music videos. And my garage was nicer than her bootleg set.
I joked that her video was paid for with a creampie, a half-filled bottle of Valtrex and a taint shine from Spencer. They paid too much. The fucking shit music doesn't even line up with the video. I know this is supposed to be a joke, but I'm not laughing.
I even watched all 10 minutes! It sort of has the look of a 1980s porn/snuff film, so I was hoping someone was going to pop out with a chainsaw at any moment.
I really don't hate you. I don't. I loves you. I just needed someone to go on this rollercoaster of torture with me. You'll forgive me later. Look on the bright side! If you watch all 10-minutes of this tarded horsey show, your boss might let you go home sick. Just tell them, "I watched the Heidi Montag video." Your boss will understand.
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Ackkkkk....my eyes! WTH was that at 4:05??!!
MK, you need to warn us about that stuff...
Submitted by xxyxz on August 26, 2008 - 1:49pm.
Yes clotty you will. I teach classes and also have a cereal available if you need some XXX-tra help
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I am knoing what XXX means, you notty green shirt.;) What cereal must I by?
Submitted by Ima on August 26, 2008 - 11:48am.
Good Lord Almighty!!
I had an easier time watching three volumes of Faces of Death!! I couldn't even stomach three minutes of this crap.
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGH!
Why'd u mention faces of death....ohm my goddness thats the most disturbing thing EVER!
(o)(o) (0)(0) (*)(*) (<)(<) (O)(O) (^)(^) (>)(>) (.)(.) ( o ) ( o )
Evil perpetuates Evil!
Oklahoma
Yeah^^^^
*opens beer*
I'm nauseated.
Yes clotty you will. I teach classes and also have a cereal available if you need some XXX-tra help
Good Lord Almighty!!
I had an easier time watching three volumes of Faces of Death!! I couldn't even stomach three minutes of this crap.
WHY WHY WHY can't Speidi disappear off the face of the Earth?
Xxyxz.. Hola! *cracks open beers*
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I DID only have two beers, It was the Liqour that fucked me up!!
xxyxz, if I am readnig your nam does this mean I will no Engrish/
I'm good miss priss !!!
Nice to see you
It's awful -- like a "Kids Incorporated" video starring Ginger Lynn.
It makes no sense. First, it sounded like a cassette tape played in my kids' Fisher Price tape deck. The video made no sense. If a video doesn't have a story line, it needs to have some good visuals or good dancing or some hot people in it.
And the Olivia Newton-John video (I assume they were trying to copy) was FUNNY. Remember? It had all these fat guys having heart attacks because Olivia was spreading her legs. This shit wasn't at all.
XX
Good! How are you sweetie?
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El Dude/Walter'08
She has to know shes a joke.
I refuse to watch anything with Horsey Montag in it.
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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade
Miss Priss
Hi!!! How are you?
I will not watch it! You can't make me MK!
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"D-Listed is like chicks who hang out together for a long time- they start getting their periods the same day.
All d-listed sluts start to think exactly alike after a while. LOLOLOLOL" Mel-tang!
Hi Double X YXZ! ♥
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El Dude/Walter'08
I'm 100% positive this is the shittiest video ever made. BARF
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El Dude/Walter'08
Is she for fucking real?????? I somehow made it to the 1:51 second mark. And where did she get the dancers in her video? Are they supposed to be funny or hot or what????? They are all fucking ugly. And she looks atrocious with that hair.
FUCK no
Now way in Hell
*booooo*I
I could only make it to the 2:45 mark. How are they not aware that they are a laughingstock?
fuck me running, that was hideous, i made it to about the 54 second mark. why doesnt this horsey bitch go away????!!!
MK, you are truly evil, but that is why we love you.
i wont do it. i cant do it. i refuse to ruin my day.
I'll thank you later with a sugar cookie and a Crisco handjob. MK
The best 10 minute + recording is CCR's "I Heard It Through the Grapevine".
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When tryin' to untangle
The Jingle from the Jangle
It's easy if you listen with your heart.
Sing Me, Sing Me, Sing Me...
Heidi-ho wants to get back to her former glory-days. Scroll down and check it out!
http://distortrait.blogspot.com/
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→←...When you come to a fork in the road, take it...◘•♣♣ Yogi Bera →←
what kind of song last ten fucking minutes!!!!!!!!!1
I shot my dads record of stairway to heaven for similar issues!
AND NO PETER FRAMPTON I DO NOT FEEEWEEEEEEEL like you DO BITCH!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
WHAT the cunty fuck? Seriously.
I CANNOT even watch it (of course I did watch maybe 65 seconds). She is awful in every way and I swear if it have to see Spencer's sick pube stache on The Hills one more time, i'm going to lose it.
the cheap bootleg effects reminds me of the sexual seduction video but in every wrong way...
I really don't know how MK lasted the 10 minutes...
Holy crap that was absolutely horrible.
She does this because they know everyone will talk about it even if it is bad.
With that said, my neighbor hood hookers can do better than this and they're usually shacked up in hourly motels 15 hrs. a day.
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I am Mexican and and I do think Michael Bay's "Transformers" is racist.
imagine having to stick your fingers in horse cooter pie?
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
YOUR MOM ARE YOU KIDDING ME OMG LAWD OMYJESUS HELP ME NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
****************************1/20/09
"TEDDY'S BACK!"
I actually heard this bitch and her male counterpart speak for the first time during one of the Olympic gossip shows or something and I wish I could erase the sickening, sugary, artificial, screechy voice out of my head.
........
Fer sure maybe, fer sure not, fer sure eh, fer sure bomb...
Submitted by platypus on April 9, 2008 - 5:12pm.
Chuck Norris didn't excuse Steven's beauty
YOur mom ate something!
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Yes that is her!
it must be her kindiegarden picture cause now she looks a lot more ravaged in the spandex video!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
I made it 51 seconds and I had to tap out. That was WITH the speakers turned off.
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Blah...blah...blah...jack me off and pour me some lemonade. -Michael K
Submitted by snowpiece on August 26, 2008 - 1:04pm.
that is heidis birth name!
ravaged horse cunt III
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Heidi getting hit by a car going 200mph would be more entertaining. It wouldn't take 10 minutes, either.
☠
"That was the most ludicrous pack of verbal peanut butter buttfuck I have ever read." ~DebFrmHell
http://www.myspace.com/zoloftpony
Submitted by Angelina Jolie-Pitt on August 26, 2008 - 12:02pm.
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Just for you, AJP!
http://www.horseproblems.com.au/Photo's/Veterinary%20Photos/Picture%20053.jpg
☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."
Wait, was it supposed to be slow? Or was that a glitch? Who the fuck bankrolled that horseshit?!
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The future Mrs. Jensen Ackles.
Submitted by Clotty McClingOn on August 26, 2008 - 1:02pm.
i bet that is the truth too. heidi leaks mustard and pickle juice
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
well, AJP, I got a lot of beastiality and a band called Ravaged Horse Cunt....
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"TEDDY'S BACK!"
Submitted by Angelina Jolie-Pitt on August 26, 2008 - 12:50pm.
Fuck is a series of letters used for punishment in the olden days for perverts.
it was made to stand for, "for unlawful kermitt knowledge" and was reserved for branding pigs who tried to do the sex to frogs on muppet shows
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I IS GOING TO MAKE FUCK ON MY SHEEP!
Holy Hell.. I just ate fish sticks for lunch. The taste of throwing up in my mouth is nothing compared to the way that my eyes feel as they are burning out of my skull from watching this. Yeah, maybe the video contributed to the throwing up, but a girl can get over that. I'd like to keep my eyes though. Well, on second thought, as long as Heidi keeps making videos like that one for the free world to watch, maybe I'd rather be blind.
Submitted by Angelina Jolie-Pitt on August 26, 2008 - 12:48pm.
clotty you think spencer gots him a pair of wittle hairless raisin baby balls down there?
One only 1/2 dropped like on those pure bread puppies with malfunctioning nut genes?
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I am thinking no, becaus his balls are in Spandex shoos! Coverd in musterd and pickel juise!
Submitted by Your Mom Ate th... on August 26, 2008 - 12:58pm.
Olivia Newton-John called, Horsey. She wants her video back
HA! Olivia Newton John called you a horse cunt heidi! some one google a horse cunt i cant on this computer!
My pain, my pleasure, my heart, my world.
Is this supposed to be a goof? Is that supposed to be her singing? It looks like she's lip synching to a completely different song. I was only able to stomach 1 1/2 minutes of this shit.
needless to say i didn't waste 10 minutes of my life watching this crap (although, sadly i did waste about 30 seconds) but i am sure this has to be a joke.