I Guarantee It Doesn't Smell Like Roses
John Law is my favorite person of the day! He reviewed Jessica Simpson's performance at the Avalon Ballroom in Ontario,Canada on Wednesday and he basically tore her a new one. Papa Joe, that's just a saying. Jessica doesn't actually have a new hole. You can break your boner now.
John writes in the Niagara Falls Review that the big-tittied frog talked too fucking much and explained what every song meant to her stupid ass. John writes, "Simpson needs to explain in exhausting detail what every single song is about, and the endless banter kills any momentum. She’s still living in a reality show, convinced everyone is so fascinated with her personal life, they’d rather hear her talk than sing." I'd rather she get her jaw wired shut like Tammy did on "The Real World: Los Angeles." Oh shit. Tammy was fucking crazy. I digress.
Throughout the nauseating night, Jessica said she was pregnant with an alien and also had a message from God about one of her songs. Of course, she blabbed about Tony Romo and slammed Nick Lachey for being a "cheater." Same Jessica shit, different day.
Jessica even admitted she has a farting problem: "I do pass gas a lot. I guarantee it smells like roses.” Every time she opens her mouth, a fart comes out. And I guarantee you that it doesn't smell like roses. It smells like Papa Joe slime, Ken Paves boogers, boiled beef and desperation.
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Still badmouthing her Ex is so childish. Wasn't it Chestica that filed for divorce from Nick? Is she trying to sabotage her pathetic career? Wish granted.
She's pissed off that Nick met somebody else. He was supposed die of a broken heart. Too bad for her Nick figured out how fucking THRILLED he was to be rid of her and her eepy-cray Daddy-Manager.
So is she like, totally country now, or still in transition?
Miss Priss ~ take care of yourself and stay strong. Losing a pet suxs.
Miss Priss, I am so sorry for your loss.
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
Romo sperm is very fattening..
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Most of what you worry about, never happens..
http://www.myspace.com/akathornhill
Miss Priss....I'm so sorry.
Miss Priss-*((((hugs)))) I'm so sorry!
On topic-Aren't Chestica's 15 minutes over yet?!?
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ILLEGITIMI NON CARBORUNDUM
Since when is Nick the Cheater? Wasn't she the one fucking 3 guys before they were even divorced? Stupid skank needs to shut her pie hole.
Submitted by Miss Priss on August 29, 2008 - 8:55am.
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Wow, I'm so sorry, Miss Priss. What a terrible shame.
☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."
were all thinking of you and your buddy dog♥♥♥
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Miss P. OMG that's awful. that happened to me two times, I know it's the worst feeling. I'm so sorry!
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"TEDDY'S BACK!"
Thank you all for your kind words...
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El Dude/Walter'08
Moment of silence for Miss Priss' beloved pet.
(((((((miss priss))))))
(<_>)
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Blah...blah...blah...jack me off and pour me some lemonade. -Michael K
Miss Priss...SO sorry for you!
:(
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You fargin sneaky bastage.
Miss Priss.. {{biggest hugs I can muster}}
♥miss priss♥
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
OMG Miss Priss
I AM SO SORRY!!!!!!
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"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot".
Miss Priss!!! OMG!
hugs..
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
omg, Miss Priss, omg....
Now I'm sad.
/\
Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
something about this bitch makes me want to come up behind her and push the backs of her knees with mine. just to watch her topple over.
I'll thank you later with a sugar cookie and a Crisco handjob. MK
speakit LOL TMI!
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"TEDDY'S BACK!"
@miss priss: omg..i'm so sorry...
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the world is great big old place for all of us to fuck up in it...
Submitted by Miss Priss on August 29, 2008 - 9:55am.
Awww you guys!!
I just got a call...my DOG JUST GOT HIT BY A CAR!!! HE'S DEAD!!!!I'm going to scream....
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Are you serious? OMG that's horrible! OH NO!! I am sooo sorry.
Oh Miss Priss! I'm so sorry. Oh no! (((hugs))) I'm crying with you.
.•´¯`•-><-•´¯`•..•´¯`•-><-•´¯`•..•´¯`•->
"Let this be a lesson. Don't hit a ho with a rum bottle! Drink all the rum instead and then take a nap!" MK, Aug. 22/08
I have nothing useful to add to the prior comments. All are exactly how I feel except I enjoyed the "big tittied frog" websites....
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"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot".
Awww you guys!!
I just got a call...my DOG JUST GOT HIT BY A CAR!!! HE'S DEAD!!!!I'm going to scream....
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El Dude/Walter'08
If only I hadn't canceled my subscription to the "Niagara Falls Review." (Great arts section.)
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if your firme with me, im firme with you simple as that.
Oxygen....LMAO. Yeah, that's one way to get people to leave you alone! LOLOLOLOLOL
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RIMADYL KILLS
My s/o's mother will only wear "Chantilly".
I think you can get that stuff for about $3.95/litre (quart, for you non-metric folks).
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You fargin sneaky bastage.
==============She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site """" W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m"""""" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now? ☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
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Mel-Tang...I know exactly what you mean...busting out laughing and no one else is just because you thought of something from D-Listed!!!
I've been walking down the street and just couldn't help to bust out. But people leave you alone!!!
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http://www.myspace.com/oxygen162
Her voice is a queef from the snatch of a siphaliftic donkey.
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
nick cheated on jessica...and jessica cheated on nick with papa joe and her fans by convincing them she was a pop star...pot meet kettle...
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the world is great big old place for all of us to fuck up in it...
I looove Jean Nate. It's a classic scent. My grandpa used to get tons of it for free because he had a friend who worked there.
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RIMADYL KILLS
The future Mrs Michael Lohan.
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Blah...blah...blah...jack me off and pour me some lemonade. -Michael K
Submitted by The C word on August 29, 2008 - 8:40am.
Here's another great quote from the review:
"It might be unfair calling Jessica Simpson’s show at the Avalon Ballroom Wednesday a train wreck. At some point, a train knows where it’s going."
That is perfection. lol
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RIMADYL KILLS
Why doesn't she just hook up with Papa Lohan and bring about the apocolypse already ?
Really can't stand this bimbo. Doesn't she think before opening her mouth.
Also if she is makng comments about her ex-husband she needs to get over that and get on with her pathetic life.
Maybe before Super Bowl Romo gets rid of her LOL.
LOL Oxygen. I was at a school conference last year, and one of the parents said something that completely made me think of D-Listed, and I busted out laughing and couldn't stop because of the mental pictures. Everyone was looking at me with death stares. LMAO
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RIMADYL KILLS
My grandma used Jean Nate...I was just remembering her.
Badmouthing your former husband/boyfriend in a public forum is incredibly low.
Go away Jessica. Only a matter of time before Tony dumps your stupid talentless ass.
Stock
Chunky cuntry sounds like a soup flavor served in hell.
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
Here's another great quote from the review:
"It might be unfair calling Jessica Simpson’s show at the Avalon Ballroom Wednesday a train wreck. At some point, a train knows where it’s going."
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You fargin sneaky bastage.
A Dumb Hillbilly. Tony Romo is on crack.
What a moron
Can't wait for the public DUMP Romo's going to take
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El Dude/Walter'08
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on August 29, 2008 - 9:32am.
I tried to Google "big-titted frog" and I don't care to mention the results I got.
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LOL....someone just asked me if I'd like to buy something for their son's fundraiser...when I saw Frog Fudgies I busted out. Big Tittied Frog Fudgies.
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http://www.myspace.com/oxygen162
Awww, how cute--She thinks she's a fly-catcher!
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"If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. But I don't think that he would like it."
Tony Romo is SO in love...
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"There's a little bit of asshole in every nice guy, and there's a little bit of genius in every moron." - RDJ
"This next song is about this one time, I lost my tampon. I could not get that bitch out. I was squatting and pushing. I think I know what childbirth must be like, really. {{burps}} Anyway, I stuck my fingers up there, just digging away. Then I realized, I had stuck a roll of toilet paper up there. Duh. {{smacks forehead}} My period blood smells like lavender, promise."
So now I will sing "Coochie, Charmin and Me".