I Guarantee It Doesn't Smell Like Roses
John Law is my favorite person of the day! He reviewed Jessica Simpson's performance at the Avalon Ballroom in Ontario,Canada on Wednesday and he basically tore her a new one. Papa Joe, that's just a saying. Jessica doesn't actually have a new hole. You can break your boner now.
John writes in the Niagara Falls Review that the big-tittied frog talked too fucking much and explained what every song meant to her stupid ass. John writes, "Simpson needs to explain in exhausting detail what every single song is about, and the endless banter kills any momentum. She’s still living in a reality show, convinced everyone is so fascinated with her personal life, they’d rather hear her talk than sing." I'd rather she get her jaw wired shut like Tammy did on "The Real World: Los Angeles." Oh shit. Tammy was fucking crazy. I digress.
Throughout the nauseating night, Jessica said she was pregnant with an alien and also had a message from God about one of her songs. Of course, she blabbed about Tony Romo and slammed Nick Lachey for being a "cheater." Same Jessica shit, different day.
Jessica even admitted she has a farting problem: "I do pass gas a lot. I guarantee it smells like roses.” Every time she opens her mouth, a fart comes out. And I guarantee you that it doesn't smell like roses. It smells like Papa Joe slime, Ken Paves boogers, boiled beef and desperation.
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Fat.
Stock Broker: Hahahah! I remember Jean Nate! I still have a massive bottle somewhere that I use when my cat tussles with a skunk.
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Yur sketti...I will haz it.
Christine Hoff ~ she's CHUNKY CUNTRY 'yall.
TMI Friday!!
I tried to Google "big-titted frog" and I don't care to mention the results I got.
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Yur sketti...I will haz it.
I didn't think I had room for any more hate, but I just keep brewing a new pot for this cunt.
UGH
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RIMADYL KILLS
God, NOBODY CARES, you stupid twat! Get the hint!
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"How much is that doggie in the window?"
What a vapid, useless, talentles piece of steaming cowpie out in the sun.
Is she still cuntry?
and is it just me, or bitch is getting chunky?
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
MK you should make this dude Hot Slut of the Week.
Can Chestica be any more useless?
I always thought Chestica's farts would smell like a combo of Jean Nate, Refried Beans & Pork Rinds.
Diarrhea of the mouth must be contagious.
Did she REALLY say that?!? If so thats fuckin disgusting.
'sweet dreams are made of these, who am i to disagree, travel the world and the 7 seas everybody is looking for something.'
The most important part of that story is the mention of the infamous Tammy "It Wasnt Not Funny" from RW LA. Now, if only Beth could have been worked into the story accusing Papa Joe of rape or something. A boy can dream.
Yes, I really needed to know about this whore's farts. And can she look any more like a blow-up doll? Please go away.
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"You're a tool. And do you know why? It's because you're a ginge, Fintan. A dirty, freckly ginge."
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww....
wtf...is this a day for slobbery open pie holes
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