Before Marilyn Manson met his new piece, she was probably a sunny blonde who worked at Hot Dog on a Stick and shopped at Wet Seal. Then Marilyn got his pasty hands on her, took her down to his dungeon and transformed her into the next Dita Von Teese. He's a regular fucking Dr. Frankenstein. Dr. Fugenstein is more like it.

At least Marilyn will save money at the cosmetics counter, because they obviously share the same lipstick. And I really don't want to know how his got smeared.

Here's Marilyn and his newest creation in Miami last night.

Bentley from The Jeffersons has passed away! The AP reports that Paul Benedict who played Mr. Bentley was found dead by his brother on Martha's Vineyard. He was 70. His brother said his death was still being investigated by authorities. Sadness.

Paul also played The Mad Painter on Sesame Street for a few years in the 70s.

Rest in peace, Paul Benedict....

When Knut was born, his skank mother rejected him, because she's a dumb whore. He was raised by his zookeeper, Thomas Dörflein, and quickly became an international superstar. Knut was on the cover of Vanity Fair, had toys made after him and was the subject of several books and DVDs. Because of his fame, the Berlin Zoo's attendance increased by 30%. Knut had it all.

Then he got older and had to bid farewell to his mommy Thomas. Thomas later died of a heart attack in his apartment.

And if that's not bad enough, the Berlin Zoo has put Knut up for sale because they simply can't afford to keep him. They say that Knut wants coochie and it would take $13 million to find him a female polar bear and build a home where they can do it in.

One of the head zookeepers said, "It's time for him to go - the sooner he gets a new home the better. Anything else would be financially irresponsible."

Er. Wasn't it financially irresponsible of the zoo not to use Knut's money properly? He made that joint millions! Now they are just putting him out, because he's no longer young and cuddly anymore.

Poor Knut. We know how this is going to play out. He's going to go off and get some floozy knocked up. Then he will turn to crack when the pressures of fatherhood becomes too much. Knut will whore around for a few years and maybe star in a couple of reality shows like Knut of Love. Then when it's all become too much Dr. Drew will take Knut in and clean him up on "Celebrity Rehab." Your typical child star story. Save Knut!

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Disney is known for producing whores, but maybe that's become too much work for them, so they've decided to hire already established whores instead. Page Six says that Wonky McValtrex is lobbying to play the title role in the live-action version of Tinkerbell. And by "lobbying" I mean sucking as many dicks as possible to get the role. Even the night janitors at Disneyland!

Some source said that Disney is actually considering it. "Paris has worked on her acting chops lately and showed some comedy prowess in her YouTube spoof of running for president. Disney suits saw it and think she may be developing some comedic-actress potential."

If they want Walt Disney to rise from the dead to shut down the company for eternity, then they should cast Wonky. Although, I think it's more appropriate if they cast this skank in the pee pee porn version called TINKLEbell.

Crunk + Disorderly, one of my favorite blogs in the history of the internets, posted these amazing pictures of what's going to be my next birthday cake. I can't wait to take these pictures down to my local Food Emporium's bakery department to request that they recreate this masterpiece. I want double frosting, though.

The NSFWish pictures are after the jump. The chick holding the birthday girl's hair is a true friend. Only real friends will hold back your hair while you're sucking on cake dick. JUMP!!!

The daughter of God and half-sister of Jesus, Celestia (aka Anne Heche), is knocked up with James Tupper's baby. It's their first child together. The crazy fauxmosexual already has a 6-year-old son named Homer with her ex-husband, Coley Laffoon.

Anne and James met on the set of Men in Trees when they were both still married. Sluts! Their spokesbitch issued this extremely wordy statement to People: "They are really thrilled."

Anne better name her kid God Jr. or Lil' Celestia. She won't, though. Since the kid will be Homer's sibling, she'll probably name it something predictable like Marge or Illiad.

P.S. - Anne got that dress at the Flavor of Love stoop sale. She forgot to read the label that clearly states the dress should only be worn by bitch's with plastic titty sacks.

Kim Zolciak of The Real Housewives of Atlanta barely beat out Toby and his wormy ass to win November's Hot Slut of the Month! This is funny since Kim's wig might be made out of the hair that Toby's leave on the carpet when he scoots his ass against it. Thanks to all who voted!

Below is our reigning Hot Slut of the Month on The Bonnie Hunt show a couple of weeks ago. I want my very own authentic Kim Zolciak wig! I can probably get one from the swap meet.

Crackho! Felicity looking like she just spent the day with Wino in Details Magazine - Egotastic!

Xtina is the tranny porn star version of Cristina Saralegui - Hollywood Tuna

Heidi & Spencer should do a staged sex tape already and get it over with - Popsugar

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson totally just hot boxed before these pictures were taken - IDLYITW

More useless goop from Fishsticks - Lainey Gossip

Sasha Fierce can fuck with anything she wants! Even Ave Maria - Just Jared

Bode Miller naked in NYC - Towleroad

Whitney Port can bore a bitch like a pro, but she can't dress worth shit (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

Beverly Hills Chihuahua should not be on this list - Hollywood Rag

Julia Roberts is married to a crazy person - Cityrag

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Little Britain's Matt Lucas officially divorced his husband of 18-months back in October and it looks like he's dried all his tears and gotten back on the horse hung.

39-year-old Matt was out shopping in L.A. yesterday with 21-year-old model Kevin Gould. The love tarts met on the set of Little Britain USA. Kevin obviously instantly fell madly in love with Matt's vivacious personality, infectious sense of humor and his love for life. Kevin has my permission to use that line during interviews when he's asked if he's giving head to get ahead.

And Matt immediately fell in love with....well....with Kevin's body. Kevin is the hotness, but that bitch needs to lose that fugly thick chain. I'm like a kitten, so when I see something shiny it catches my eye and distracts me from finding out important information like how big the peen is.