This Is A Sign
Chestica Simpson started to perform the song "With You" on Good Morning America today, but had to stop because the police arrived and were about to arrest her for disturbing the peace. No. Chestica told the audience: "Hold on, I know this is live TV but I can't hear anything."
You're not the only one, honey. I could barely hear anything either after listening to her frog warble for a few seconds. Jessica should take this as a fucking sign. Even her own ear monitor couldn't take that shit!
Chest started the song again, but continued to have issues. Click here to see this shit.
Her "hearing" issues weren't her only problems. What in the pork rind hell was she wearing?! It looks like Miss Piggy's unused maternity dress from when she had a pregnancy scare that one time.
Personally, I don't think Chestica is knocked up. She's just an attention whore! Papa Joe wants people to think Ches is with child, so they can keep talking about her ass. And I've fallen for his trap. Damn him!
Wenn
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Yiooooooo and Boob-
I am not hispanic, but I am an American who lives in France and spends alot of holidays in Spain. My first time there, I noticed how the Spanish speak with their "ssss" almost like a Cindy Brady lisp. It was strange because I had never heard spanish like that growing up in the States. The people I knew were Mexican, P Rican, and South American (Peru, Argentina, and Chile). That's a big difference, no? The "ssssss"
Submitted by rotten_egg on September 9, 2008 - 3:51pm.
I love grammar nazis =D Makes me feel comfy, I'm a teacher!
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
http://www.fotolog.com/justmemyselfandi
Submitted by yiooooooo on September 9, 2008 - 3:49pm.
eres tomada en serio en ingles pero el castellano es de castillas y no hay existe el espanol puro por que muchas de las palabras usadas en el idioma son prestamos lenguisticos.
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El español puro existe, pero es muy antiguo y ya no se habla, y SI es de España.
El CASTELLANO es lo que se habla en Latinoamerica. SI, es de Castilla. SI es de España pero ese no es el pais donde mejor se habla.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
http://www.fotolog.com/justmemyselfandi
People from Peru also have their own accent, right?. Señoriita Laaaura!. hehe. My spanish is cool, because I'm a grammar nazi. But I didn't know the peruanos had the best spanish.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
Haha :P this is basics from the singer's manual: this is how you do it!
You can't sing, its a fact, but you're purdy so you sell some records... on a live performance stare at the live sound engineer and blame "technical issues".. voilá!
eres tomada en serio en ingles pero el castellano es de castillas y no hay existe el espanol puro por que muchas de las palabras usadas en el idioma son prestamos lenguisticos.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on July 14, 2008 - 8:39pm.
HUG ME JESUS! I SAY, HUG ME JESUS!!!! Can I get an Amen from the DListed congregation...I say, can I GET AN AMEN FROM THE DLISTED CONGREGATION???? You know you ho's want a hug from Jesus
Ahaha! "yo amo pepes largos en mi culo". That's funny. But it would be something like "yo amo penes grandes en mi culo", right?.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
something is seriously wrong with that girl.
she suffers from the notoriously difficult to treat
" i think im cuter than i really am" syndrome
god bless america is part of jc's repertoire
she sings god bless america as a torch song.
search youtube to see her singing this tune, eyes closed, bosom thrust out, completely inappropriate.
Submitted by yiooooooo on September 9, 2008 - 3:40pm.
Submitted by Boob3rries on September 9, 2008 - 5:28pm
Not really, Spain has...wait a second...
España solo alberga la Real Academia, que regula el lenguaje español y lo que sea o vaya a ser aceptado como vocablo. Peru tiene el español mas puro, pero obviamente que va a tener su lado ghetto, eso pasa en todas partes desafortunadamente. Seria tan hermoso y emocionante que NADIE tuviese acentos y todo el mundo hablase apropiadamente. Pero creeme que se de que estoy hablando, de otra forma, no lo diria.
Sorry Dlisted readers for disrupting with a Spanish rant. It felt appropriate given that I would not be taken seriously in English about the matter.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
http://www.fotolog.com/justmemyselfandi
Submitted by Boob3rries on September 9, 2008 - 5:28pm
Actually the best spanish comes from Spain they have the royal Academy of the spanish language( La real academia de la lengua espanola) which is the group of people who decided what words go in the spanish dictionary
I have seen Laura en America( filmed in Peru really ghetto)and believe me sometimes I dont understand what the presenter a well educated woman is saying
Submitted by Tigerlilly on July 14, 2008 - 8:39pm.
HUG ME JESUS! I SAY, HUG ME JESUS!!!! Can I get an Amen from the DListed congregation...I say, can I GET AN AMEN FROM THE DLISTED CONGREGATION???? You know you ho's want a hug from Jesus
And with all of this talk of a Latina Jessica Simpson...
You know MK would shit himself if she showed up with gorgeous chola eyebrows singing "Yo Amor Pepes Largos en mi Culo."
She is my favorite. I love her music. Just saw her on millionaire personals site """"C e l e b C u p i d.c o m"""""" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site. Is she single again? Just curious!-----☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆---------
Submitted by Jeffro11 on September 9, 2008 - 1:50pm.
*Jessicina Simpsona debut's her new CD, "Un Colecion de Caca", and the hit single, "Yo Amor Pepes Largos en mi Culo."
*2 years of HS spanish and 6 years of living in San Diego obviously did jack shit for me.
*Mi Papa Amores Mi ChiChi's.
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I've been speaking Spanish for about 21 years (I'm 22) and trust me, it ain't that bad.
The country that speaks the best and most untainted Spanish of all is Peru. So the references the rest of us? might have are clearly not the best ones.
And I can't even speak English today, so what gives!
But your Spanish is better than you think.
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"Writing that made my eyeballs fart." MK
http://www.fotolog.com/justmemyselfandi
Submitted by angel_i on September 9, 2008 - 5:07pm.
I agree, but that is a given with any JSimp post.
I can't stand this little bitch. She made Nick wait for sex for what, 4 years? Maybe more? And then she marries him and starts getting some success of her own and BOOM. She starts tramping around, dumps Nick, starts badmouthing him when he isn't around to defend himself... What a cunt. She is becoming quite the joke in the singing world. There is always some excuse she makes, isn't there? "My dress is too tight, my voice is bad, I can't hear anything..." I call bullcrap. I watched her Grand Ole Opry performance and she was pathetic.
And what the hell is it with her sticking her tongue out all of the time now? I want to rip that thing off. It's cute when you are 5, but not when you are grown up.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Submitted by anastasia beave... on September 9, 2008 - 4:47pm.
Two words for the first pic:
Taylor Dayne
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Funny. I only had one and it was immediate: EW.
♥ ThreadKilla!/Lean Like a Chola/She's a Lady.
"You sicken everyone! Even Michael Jackson!" overheardinnewyork
I've said it before and I'll say it again..>I just want to kick her in the fucking cunt every time I see this big titted toad. Romo must either need a beard, or must have gotten hit too many times to willingly be with her.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
Isn't Putin Grand?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4088345.stm
Two words for the first pic:
Taylor Dayne
Very true on the latin...in the Navy I worked with people of Cuban, Puerto Rican, Mexican, Panamanian descents, I quit trying to understand them and stuck to my "Tijuana" spanish. Chingala, bendejo, mas cerveza, etc.
Dude it's Pendejo not bendejo. ay que pendejo ! LOL
Okay WTF? is she trying to make us remember her at a better time in her life, with Nick? That's the song she sang about them. I'm sure Tony can't be too happy about it. Or maybe he really doesn't care. And wow, her voice really sucks now. It's like she got cursed. She used to be really good years ago.
It is time for Tony to give Jessica SImpleton the boot, this is getting ridiculous.
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"I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drankin' problem and jealous old man in jail "- Roger Alan Wade
Submitted by Jeffro11 on September 9, 2008 - 4:45pm.
same thing she always does...TRY TOO HARD.
You are so right!
It reminds me of a song from The Silent League
Its just another think I could have done
If I didnt try so hard.....
Good song from some people with actual talent who are busting their asses making good music but instead we must listen to THIS. BOOOOOOO
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
I hate this fuckin' broad.
same thing she always does...TRY TOO HARD.
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"Shut up, you stupid bitch! If it weren't for me you'd still be slinging hash in that shithouse and f*cking your boss!"
Did you hear how she pronounced hair? She made it 3 syllables. What is wrong with Tony Romo? The Dallas Cowboys qb can't do any better than that dumb as dirt, frogfaced midget?
Very true on the latin...in the Navy I worked with people of Cuban, Puerto Rican, Mexican, Panamanian descents, I quit trying to understand them and stuck to my "Tijuana" spanish. Chingala, bendejo, mas cerveza, etc.
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"Shut up, you stupid bitch! If it weren't for me you'd still be slinging hash in that shithouse and f*cking your boss!"
When I scrolled down and saw this picture, I didn't know who it was. I thought it was some 50-year old, bleached blonde bimbo scrunching up their face in a very unbecoming fashion. I guess I was right! Oh, except for the age! But, she does look quite old and ugly.
And what is with the tongue? Is she just retarded or something?
It looks like it might be time for her father to get the gun out AGAIN!! cuz it's time for another SHOTGUN WEDDING. The Simpson girls should write a book, "Trapping a Man 101 by Dummies".
She looks like she belongs in a Southern Baptist church choir: "While sister Jessica sings another stanza of 'Bringin' In the Sheaves', wontcha come?"
Remember when MichaelK use to have "Say Something Nice"? I will leave today on a positive note.
At least Jessica can make it through a performance without wetting herself.
http://www.mattdahl.com/fergie_1.jpg
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I used to be a swinger
Til you wrapped me
Round your finger,
Just like a yo-yo
Just like a yo-yo
Lolo,
I had a long streak of that bad luck
But I'm prayin' it's gone at last
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Ow, ya dont stop, c'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon,
Give me more of that funky horn
What's that? Yeah. Funky Funky. Biddy biddy bop.
Submitted by Jeffro11 on September 9, 2008 - 1:19pm.
"...Ice cubes in your drink"....
See, she's not even smart enough to realize you can't fit ice cubes into a Budweiser can! And she claims she's country...if she's country then my ass is a banjo.
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Ha ha ha! That's mega-hilarious!
Submitted by Jeffro11 on September 9, 2008 - 3:57pm
Lol, is ok I have been speaking spanish all my life and I always mess it up.
In each Hispanic country the same words have different words
Example:
Bicho in Puerto Rico means Dick in other country it means Insect
Carajo its a curse word in Puerto rico in other country is a part of a pirate ship
Submitted by Tigerlilly on July 14, 2008 - 8:39pm.
HUG ME JESUS! I SAY, HUG ME JESUS!!!! Can I get an Amen from the DListed congregation...I say, can I GET AN AMEN FROM THE DLISTED CONGREGATION???? You know you ho's want a hug from Jesus
Mi Papa Amores Mi ChiChi's
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"Shut up, you stupid bitch! If it weren't for me you'd still be slinging hash in that shithouse and f*cking your boss!"
No. No. Embarassing to watch. She'd do better touring malls. Just not a performer. Neither is her sister. Both are marginal singers. All of us have probly heard better at karaoke night. I know I have.
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on September 9, 2008 - 4:29pm.
HA HA HA!!!!!
I fuggin love it!
I have had that song stuck in my head since this morning. Love Paul!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
I dont think she's pregnant...it's just an ugly dress.
Anyway, I watched the video and was laughing throughout most of it. Also, why was she trying to "sound country" while singing this song?? It wasn't a country song but I guess she thinks she is totally country now.
Lolo!!
If you’ll be my bodyguard
I can be your long lost pal
I am stalking you today.
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Ow, ya dont stop, c'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon,
Give me more of that funky horn
What's that? Yeah. Funky Funky. Biddy biddy bop.
that face is priceless, she continues to find new ways to humiliate herself.
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
First track on her Latin album:
"I Hava da Bigga Pussya"
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
yiooooooo: Yeah, I meant penis. I actually meant DICKS!
2 years of HS spanish and 6 years of living in San Diego obviously did jack shit for me.
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"Shut up, you stupid bitch! If it weren't for me you'd still be slinging hash in that shithouse and f*cking your boss!"
"Don't know why people think he is too good for Jess"
A monkey is too good for Jess.
“The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook”
She has always dressed super fugly, and it's only gotten worse since she's gone cuntry. Who says cuntry has to be fugly. I also hate how her toes are hanging over her shoes. That shit drives me crazy. Buy some shoes that fit your feet, people!
She has quite the air of desperation about her, no?
She should take whatever money she's swindled from the masses and go the hell away. Her services are neither desired nor required.
Submitted by Jeffro11 on September 9, 2008 - 3:50pm
By pepes you mean Pene (Penis ), right??
Submitted by Tigerlilly on July 14, 2008 - 8:39pm.
HUG ME JESUS! I SAY, HUG ME JESUS!!!! Can I get an Amen from the DListed congregation...I say, can I GET AN AMEN FROM THE DLISTED CONGREGATION???? You know you ho's want a hug from Jesus
I think she looks like Fergie in the top pic.
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I used to be a swinger
Til you wrapped me
Round your finger,
Just like a yo-yo
Just like a yo-yo
Submitted by xxyxz on September 9, 2008 - 4:20pm.
Ha ha ha!
Send Okie my big gay love ok?
I want to take you two on a big gay boat ride.
I can call you Betty, oh and umm , Betty? Betty, you can call me Al.
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
LOL JEFFRO!!!
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
The best part about her going latin would be that she'd have no friggin idea what she was saying!
Jessicina Simpsona debut's her new CD, "Un Colecion de Caca", and the hit single, "Yo Amor Pepes Largos en mi Culo."
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"Shut up, you stupid bitch! If it weren't for me you'd still be slinging hash in that shithouse and f*cking your boss!"
LoLo
lol
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This avvie is for Oklahoma