Wino Didn't Show Up To Her Own Birthday Party
The Crackie of Camden was at home, getting ready for her birfday party, when she wiped the crack dust away from her mirror, took a good look at herself and realized she was too fugly to leave the house. That's what The Sun claims anyway.
Wino's friends and family, including Mark Ronson, Adele and her mommy, gathered at London’s Jazz After Dark club on Saturday night for her party, but she never showed. Three cabs were called to take Wino to her party, but they were all sent away. A friend said: “Amy was standing in front of the mirror telling everyone how rough she looked. She kept saying she was ugly and was in an awful state. They couldn’t get her out." Um.....is this first time she's looked in the mirror in the past year?
Everyone waited at her party until 2am. When they were told Wino wasn't going to show, her mother broke down in tears. Does Wino's mommy even know her own daughter? There's always a 50/50 shot Wino is going to show up. With Wino, you can't put all your coke in one line. That doesn't really make sense, but it's still early for me.
Wino's friends should have put their dumb dumb heads together and come up with a way to get her to the party. I would've told her ass that the balloons were filled with nitrous and the cake was made out of meth and ice pops. Homecrackie, would've put a paper bag over her head and ran right over!
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What a strange group of people. Reminds me of the mad hatter's tea party or something. Mrs. Winehouse's outfit is simply stunning XD
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Submitted by TT99 on September 15, 2008 - 6:42pm.
I must defend Amy Winehouse. In all fairness, she is a crackhead and was probably completely unaware that it was her birthday.
No, the poor dear thought it was an intervention.......
~~~~Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.~~~~
Then I want some crack before my 40th.
I must defend Amy Winehouse. In all fairness, she is a crackhead and was probably completely unaware that it was her birthday.
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"I'll go unlock the kids and make us all breakfast." - Theodore Bagwell
Mark Ronson bugs me. It's like he rolls out of bed thinking he is the coolest dude on the planet. I know I don't even know him. He still bugs me though.
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The Judges would've also accepted:
"Don't Chop All Your Coke Into Just One Line"
Amy's straight up delusional when it comes to her looks I imagine. Sometimes she's so high she thinks she looks great, then the next day she sees pictures of her fug crackie face in the Sun or Mail and decides that she looks shit and then doesn't come out. She's looking really really bad these days though. Like worryingly BAD! She needs to cut that shit out, do one massive line of coke and just quit everything including the H. Either it preserves you like Keith Richards or it'll end up killing you by 27 (and it looks like she might go down that same road with all the other rock stars in history)...
Your face!
is that Mamma Cass Elliot?
Ha!
Maybe she thought her party was at The Peach Pit After Dark and went there instead?
I saw his profile on millionaire&celeb dating site ^^^^^^S e e k w e a l t h y. C O M^^ ^^^^ last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship he is looking for on that site.
I'm I just a stupid American but I think the Brits take the cake for out of control gifted people fing up there lives. Shit man Winehouse is only 25! Mondays always suck I have ragged on her but a part of me wants so much for her to get her shit together. P.S. I love crazy avatars but Sickacockinwoo your avatar is making me homophobic!
lol :) My Avatar comes from the nurd convention Comic Con and trust me I don't look anything like my macho Avatar. :)
You can sorta see Mark Ronson's LADY HIPS in pic 2!
Maybe she's having an early midlife crisis.
Birthdays will do it.
I didn't know Adele and Amy were friends. They sort of sound alike.
"it's my party an i'll die if i want to, die if i want to. . ." bad hysteria. bad girl. go to your memory sector and timeout.
That must have been some really good drug to make her look in the mirror to make that assesment.
Please Mr. Francis Ford Coppola, make a Godfather part 4 with Talia Shire as the Godfather and Kay finally with the program.
Why does Mark Ronson have a butt hanging out of his mouth in nearly ever picture? Not attractive!
through the crack smoke, wino must've had a moment of clarity...
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that's some serious meat you're packin'...
hey let's let chief eat his MEAT!!!!
GO MEAT!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ygdz86_-JDc
The Intervention Dream Team for Wino:
1. Dog, the Bounty Hunter (to smoke her out of her den)
2. Dr. Laura (to nag her into permanent sobriety)
3. Judge Judy (to impart a sense of perpetual Jewish guilt)
4. Father Merryl from the Exorcist (duh)
Juni, I'd love to believe it's the former, but I'd put money down on the latter.
How did everyone fare through Ike? Even though I'm in Louisville, we had horribly strong winds today. Enough trees & power lines were down that schools & many businesses cancelled their days today. They're estimating days before the power is back, so I may be bringing my 5-year-old assistant with me to work several days ...
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"I'm intellectual & stuff." "You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue & stuff."
http://www.myspace.com/dramaqueen365247
So very sad.
Wow! what a coincidence! Her annual moment of lucidity happened on the day of her party.
sorry 'bout dat Amy. Now clean your ass up.
Is she making the connection between why she is "ugly and in an awful state" with what she is doing to herself? Or is it all an accident and everybody else's fault?
That's what I was thinking, a party? How about a nice trip to re-hab, that would be a true gift, in this case.
the gift of life, you know.
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
What Wino's mom needs to do is put on a grey hoodie and put a beat down on amy and her crack pipe.
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
The "friends" should have had an intervention rather than a party in a club. WTF?
Honestly, who expect a crackhead to show up for anything?
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Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything. ~Kurt Vonnegut
Why didn't her dumbass parents go to her house and check on her?
"Ummm"... is not an answer!" Judge Judy
TheBreakdown
Nah, it has a filter on it.
On topic: Wino posts are just sad now. She is beyond a joke and is now just the punchline.
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I barely know what 2+2 is, but I know how to walk backwards out of a stupid room. -M.K.
the mirror doesn't lie.
Is he smoking what I think he is smoking, and if so, why is he not sharing?!!
Bastard!
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://societysex.blogspot.com/
I think she saw the shoes her mother was wearing and decided not to go.
Her enablers should have thrown a big intervention.
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I'm in love with a big blue frog,
A big blue frog loves me.