Skeletor Had A Birthday Party
Yesterday, JLo finished the Malibu Triathlon in 2 hours, 23 minutes, then got on a plane, hooked up Skeletor to an IV and headed for NYC. JLo threw her husband a 40th birthday party at the Bowery Hotel. Yes, 40. Four. Zero. I mean, they say 40 and we say 340. Mutant vampires zombies live a long time.
Guests included that hag Leah Remini, Dita Von Teese, Kimora, Dijmon Honsou, Brooke Shields, Allegra and Donatella Versace. Donatella and Skeletor feed from the same blood bank, so they're really close friends.
Heidi Klum was reportedly invited to the party, but refused to show up after JLo pulled out from judging "Project Runway." As you know, JLo's rep said she injured her fugly foot and wanted to stay off of it so that she could compete in the triathlon.
A source told MSNBC's The Scoop that JLo is lie-telling about the foot shit. They said that JLo was in talks to star in a film for The Weinstein Company, who also produce PR. When JLo found out she didn't get the role, she got upset and pulled out as a judge. Who cares why she pulled out! We should be grateful that we have been spared! I'd take Tim Gunn over JLo any day. Fuck, I'd take a caca sandwich over JLo.
Here's some pictures from Skeletor's birthday party last night. And just for shits, I've also added some pictures of JLo getting hit by a wave during the triathlon. Her trainer had to pull her drowning ass out of the water. HAHAHAHAHA!
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angel_i , Dita's gorgeousness takes work. It probably takes her 4 hours to prepare for these events. Though, it's so worth it.
As much as I hate to admit it, Leah Remini looks very pretty here. Beautiful dress. Ick, moving along...
Yup, these Hollywood whores get to party it up on your fan dime as the world around them is falling into the shitter at a faster flush then ever.
Fuck all these stupid cunts!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Submitted by Some Girl on September 15, 2008 - 5:20pm.
Dita Von Teese is gorgeous, but someone should have told her it was a BIRTHDAY PARTY, not a damn funeral!
Then again, it was Skeletor's party, so maybe there's not much difference
I agree. She is, in fact, the only one dressed correctly for an undead b-day. Jesus wept, that man looks rough. I am amazed Miss Piss is still with him, it must be months they've been married now.
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Leave the thinking to horses, they've got bigger heads.
Ditto to "The C Word"
Poor Allegra's looking skeletal again. I hope she gets healthy some day soon. I can't imagine what it would be like to lose your brother and daughter.
john mayer within a few years... that´s what skeleton looks like.
**whatever**
Was this a scino party? Has Brooke taken a walk on the crazy side? Tell me it aint so.
“The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook”
I'm intrigued yet, slightly creeped out by Dita Von Teese...she reminds me of a porcelain doll that has come to life and just quietly sits in the corner and stares at you.
*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****
JLo is the epitome of overblown extravagance and excess. She belongs in the 80's with power-dressing, shoulder pads and unadulterated greed. She seems oblivious to the fact that her adoration of wealth and over-the-top spending just doesn't sit well with people today. The more money she's earnt and spent, the less popular she's become. And then there was that ludicrous attempt to make us believe she was still "jenny-from-the-block" while showing off her Hollywood star boyfriend and lounging on a private yacht. She just doesn't seem to get the idea that people don't want to see celebs flaunt their wealth in our faces nowadays, we want them to be a bit more real. She's turning up at this party thinking we all think she looks a million dollars (which is probably what she's spent), when we're actually thinking she looks like an overblown, over-the-top, anachronistic relic from the greediest decade of the twentieth century.
Allegra was way skinnier you could see every bone in her body ,she is slowly recovering you can'y ask a addict to stop being a addinct in one, is a day to day journey
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"I'm ginna drezz mah baby in all bran namez 'n' if I can't afford it, I guess I'm ginna still it!" or "If mah baby losez its pacifier, I have three mo'!"
@GIG: Yes - and Dita too, she does look lovely...as USUAL! It must be nice to be her, in that way.
♥ ThreadKilla!/Lean Like a Chola/She's a Lady.
"You sicken everyone! Even Michael Jackson!" overheardinnewyork
Submitted by M.E. on September 15, 2008 - 11:16am.
Dita reminds me of The Black Dahlia (Elizabeth Short).
It creeps me the fuck out.
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I never thought of that. Until NOW. Eepy-cray. It's not even Halloween yet!
Dita Von Teese is gorgeous, but someone should have told her it was a BIRTHDAY PARTY, not a damn funeral!
Then again, it was Skeletor's party, so maybe there's not much difference.
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on September 15, 2008 - 12:12pm.
Submitted by angel_i on September 16, 2008 - 1:09am.
That's Allegra Versace. Donatella's daughter. She's looking much better these days.
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Better? Eeep!
No, no - she can't be named Allegra! That means "happiness"! And yes - I recognized Donatella after a moment there...also: Eeep!
♥ ThreadKilla!/Lean Like a Chola/She's a Lady.
"You sicken everyone! Even Michael Jackson!" overheardinnewyork
Seriously, I am not trying to be snarky, but how is Allegra Versace still alive? Your organs can only take so much of that starvation shit before they call it a day.
Dita Von Teese looks fabulous! What a beauty.
I love Brooks Shields' dress, and she wears it well.
The look on Skeletor’s face tells me JelLo is squeezing his hand too tight.
Brooke looks good….
Poor Allegra (my gf’s daughter has anorexia and it’s a horrible illness), hope she gets well soon. I think it will be a tougher battle for her than for some, what with her being surrounded by a world obsessed with image/surface vs. substance.
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I'm in love with a big blue frog,
A big blue frog loves me.
I cant stand that loud mouth bitch from King of Queens or her fat ass dick head baby that throws fits and pisses the parents bed and still sucks on her stupid scientology bottle even though shes four fucking years old. God damn fucking morons
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Dita reminds me of The Black Dahlia (Elizabeth Short).
It creeps me the fuck out.
Submitted by Green Is Good on September 16, 2008 - 1:13am.
I've always thought Kimera has looked like "she" knows how to tuck it.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yFZQaUlcgA
Classic MST3K.
Is Kimora A dude in drag? Seriously, Yikes!
Donatella's daughter (2nd pic, 2nd row) Allegra was hospitalized for Anorexia. They better send her back, because she looks like she'll be joining Skeletor in the crypt shortly.
Submitted by angel_i on September 16, 2008 - 1:09am.
That's Allegra Versace. Donatella's daughter. She's looking much better these days. Too bad her mother still looks like she could suck out a person's soul without opening her mouth.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yFZQaUlcgA
Classic MST3K.
Submitted by Lor on September 15, 2008 - 12:07pm.
Thats a stereotype and she is not puertorrican she is newyorican, she was not born or raised on PR
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"I'm ginna drezz mah baby in all bran namez 'n' if I can't afford it, I guess I'm ginna still it!" or "If mah baby losez its pacifier, I have three mo'!"
MK:
Are you sure she didn't use a body double for the triathlon? I haven't seen JLo break a sweat since she was a Fly Girl on In Living Color.
What's up with the fur (in beginning of September) on her dress? It looks crazy.
She makes me sick. I have no doubt she canceled PR at the last minute because of some stupid reason like you posted. Or her make-up artist couldn't show up for her two hour make-up session.
Looks like Skeletor started early. Wonder which alkie he drank from. Donatella? Kimora? Leah? You know that bitch is mixing vodka with her barley water.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yFZQaUlcgA
Classic MST3K.
Well, kudos to Brooke Shields for looking human.
Can't be easy standing out like a sore thumb that way.
2 questions: Leah doesn't like to be at Skeletor's party?
and
What's with the big head alien lady hanging around with that cat-face lady? She's not THE cat-face lady but A cat-face lady.
which really is all about question 3.
What the hell is wrong with all these people???
♥ ThreadKilla!/Lean Like a Chola/She's a Lady.
"You sicken everyone! Even Michael Jackson!" overheardinnewyork
Gad, all Skeletor needs is a crypt to crawl into. Seriously, he's doesn't well.
Who's the hot piece of man meat rescuing J-Lo's carcass from drowning? Hot Slut alert!
Why do puerto-ricans always dress so tacky?
I think he is a cocaine addict. He definitely has that look, especially around his eyes. I saw him on our local morning show and he was obviously high as a kite. He was constantly licking his lips, rubbing nose, blinking his eyes and twitching all over the place.
I like how Dijmon Honsou just blends into the night. Allegra and Donatella are walking death.
I like J-lo's dress
He looks like his hip popped out of socket in the 2nd. thumbnail, and whats up with Donatella's friend...?... she needs to eat some b-day cake or something!
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"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot".
why is this twat always wearing a ballgown? Is she under the impression this is 1950 and shes a "glamorous" movie "star???" I would LOVE to see her fall down in one of her stupid gowns.
speaking of sandwiches, when is allegra gonna eat one?
I sort of like her dress in the first picture.........................
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why did her trainer had to rescue her fat ass?????????
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"I'm ginna drezz mah baby in all bran namez 'n' if I can't afford it, I guess I'm ginna still it!" or "If mah baby losez its pacifier, I have three mo'!"
He looks like he's drunk and hiccuping.
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Amy just wanted to say she cracked Harry's potter. That didn't make any sense, but just politely nod your head and move on....
How old is Skeletor? 477? Vampires live for centuries.