"My Pussy's Stuck In The Toilet"
Christie Klassette of Belmont, NC was in her kitchen when she heard her pussy screaming from the bathroom. Christie immediately ran over and found her cat Charlie stuck in the toilet.
Christie said: "He was splashing water everywhere. I thought he was just sitting there but when I went to pick him up he wouldn't move." Charlie's little pussy legs were stuck in the drain. She called 911 and within 5 minutes firefighters showed up at her door.
They used hammers to break the toilet. It was either break the toilet or break the pussy's legs. They made the right choice. A pussy with broken legs is not cute or nice.
Christie isn't sure how Charlie got stuck in the toilet. She thinks either her 3-year-old son tried to flush him down the toilet or maybe he fell in while trying to drink some water. It was the 3-year-old. Look at how he's throwing around that stuffed Elmo!
Or maybe Charlie was trying to fucking escape! Looking at a woman with no eyebrows all day long starts to make you crazy after a while. Seriously, give that ho a Sharpie!
Charlie is also up for adoption. Christie saved him from the streets a little while ago and never planned on keeping him. So if you're in the market for an adorable toilet pussy, Charlie is your cat.
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Submitted by El Bastardo on September 18, 2008 - 1:08pm.
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LOL'ing at Vicki Pollard!
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I'm in love with a big blue frog,
A big blue frog loves me.
Oh sweet Jesus, let the break up rumors be true.....
The only realy question is what does commingback think of this? maybe we can persuade it to change her love from shittney to brangie. hmm....
"goes off to take a shit and ponder this"
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
At least this story had a happy ending (hopefully Charlie will end up in a good, loving home).
Sadly, this story made me furious:
http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/09/18/actor.cat.cruelty.ap/index.html
Submitted by UKer on September 18, 2008 - 1:06pm.
Submitted by snowpiece on September 18, 2008 - 1:03pm.
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sadly perez is a brangiloonie too so i honestly think that there might be some truth in this.
wouldn't surprise me at all.
the woman is a fucking nightmare. i bet brad wishes he had never layed eyes on her.
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I'm sure his eyes ain't ALL he wishes he'd never laid! Now he has six babies and one very crazy babymama.
Submitted by Clarisse on September 18, 2008 - 5:05pm.
El Bastardo
If all Brits lie..that means you are lying about all Brits lying...which means, all Brits tell the truth...but that would mean..
Yeah but, no but, but yeah......I'm a thieving Lying Cockney bastard.....Respect me! :o)
snowpiece on September 18, 2008 - 1:07pm
*throws post-it pad at snowy*
SHHHHHHHHHHH.................
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
Brangelina broke up?
Awww shit! It's just a blurb posted by Pigez? Fuuuuuuucccckkkkkk! I so want this to be true. Escape the man trap, Bradley. You can do it!
hey, it's a slow day, maybe this will bring LA out of the woodwork??????****************************1/20/09
"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
If it IS true, I wonder how the loons are going to spin it? Hahaha, I hear heads exploding.
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What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
Submitted by snowpiece on September 18, 2008 - 1:03pm.
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sadly perez is a brangiloonie too so i honestly think that there might be some truth in this.
wouldn't surprise me at all.
the woman is a fucking nightmare. i bet brad wishes he had never layed eyes on her.
Submitted by MyFingersHurt on September 18, 2008 - 1:02pm.
Stuff like this makes me so glad I don't have a Southern accent. I know that makes me sound like an asshole, but so be it. No matter what someone with a Southern accent says, 99% of the time, it sounds stupid.
hahaha it took me a few seconds to realize she was saying toilet... i have never heard it pronoucned like that
I ain't going to Pigez's site, fuck that.
Only when People magazine does the 400 page interview and photo spread will I believe.
p.s. I actually believe they have been broken up for a while but that's because i had renewed my Bradilooney membership.
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
El Bastardo
If all Brits lie..that means you are lying about all Brits lying...which means, all Brits tell the truth...but that would mean..
Oy. I need to lay down now.
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Clay pigeons are fuckers!
What little Johnny doesn't know is that kitty pissed all over his Elmo last night in retaliation.
Off Topic: Nil posted on JustJared re. the rumoured breakup.
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I'm in love with a big blue frog,
A big blue frog loves me.
LOVEANDERSON
haha! we posted at the same time! great minds think alike!
on topic, holy sheet, do we flee the apocoplpse or do we take our changes in the basement???
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
UKer: he just wants bajillions of hits, I'm not biting....BUT keep us posted, LOL thanks! ;)
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"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
Submitted by El Bastardo on September 18, 2008 - 1:00pm.
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lol you meanie, what did i ever do to you? i was just reportingb what i saw on another site
Snowpiece
why you standing around tawking? feed the toilet bats and recharge the sofa batteries, we're outta here!!!!!
"leashing the dog, lace up combat boots."
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
Poor cat. Prob wished the eyebrowless wonder and her monster child left him on the streets. If you have kids AND animals you all best be teaching your kids how to play nice with them. It makes me sick when I see kids smacking on their dog or pulling their cats tail, WTF. Then the parents have the audacity to put the dog down when it snips and the fucking bastard child. Well if someone was hitting me all the time I would snap to, stop blaming the animals that were FINE before your brat came along. Blame the child its usually their fault.
'Smoke 2 joints in the morning, smoke 2 joints at night, smoke 2 joints in the afternoon it makes me feel alright. I smoke 2 joints in time of peace and 2 in time of war. I smoke 2 joints before I smoke 2 joints and then I smoke 2 more.' - Sublime
christine the hoff on September 18, 2008 - 1:00pm
don't forget the SOFA BATTERIES WOW!
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
Stuff like this makes me so glad I don't have a Southern accent. I know that makes me sound like an asshole, but so be it. No matter what someone with a Southern accent says, 99% of the time, it sounds stupid.
Submitted by snowpiece on September 18, 2008 - 12:59pm.
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this is what perez posted:
There is an unsubstantiated "rumor" floating around today that Brad and Angelina have broken up.
Discuss.
LOL CTH: don't forget to board up the windows!!!
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"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
Submitted by Stoney on September 18, 2008 - 9:56am.
How exactly does a kitten demand you fill up the sink, lol? Fuck you, kitty. You'll drink from the bowl or die!
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My Diva goes into the bathroom and sits in the sink and CRIES until I come in there and turn on the water for her.
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Living on reds and vitamin C and cocaine All her friends can say is ain't it a shame.
"Frantically bottling water and throwing canned goods into car trunk."
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
Dont believe UKer, shes British, all Brits lie! :o)
i'm not entirely surprised i must say. brad has has enough of her shit, the guy just wants an easy life she's fucking hard work.
oh no UKer, not even that can make me go to that pink hell....
****************************1/20/09
"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
UKER
SAY WHAT???????????????????????????????????
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
_Submitted by UKer on September 18, 2008 - 1:26pm.
Hey bitches, Brangelina have broken up, the loons are gonna freak lol
HA HA AH LINK IT UP SEXY!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Submitted by UKer on September 18, 2008 - 4:56pm.
Hey bitches, Brangelina have broken up, the loons are gonna freak lol
OMGLOLZ. Dont believe you though. LIARHEAD!
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on September 18, 2008 - 12:57pm.
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check fatboy's site, that's the rumour going around.
loves it.
Submitted by UKer
Hey bitches, Brangelina have broken up, the loons are gonna freak lol
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Details, please. Like, when exactly is the earth gonna spin off its axis??
poor widdle guy..
my cat Linus once jumped up on the side of the tub, lost his balance and ended up in the water, that was fucking funnaaayyy.
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"what're you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go home and fuck your mother?"
UKer on September 18, 2008 - 12:56pm
What?
Don't fuck with me British person, Ima PMS'ing....
...I am aka BRADIFUL BITCH, I SWEAR!!!...
Submitted by UKer on September 18, 2008 - 9:56am.
Hey bitches, Brangelina have broken up, the loons are gonna freak lol
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Say what now?
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Living on reds and vitamin C and cocaine All her friends can say is ain't it a shame.
Submitted by UKer on September 18, 2008 - 11:56am.
Nuh-UH!
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
How exactly does a kitten demand you fill up the sink, lol? Fuck you, kitty. You'll drink from the bowl or die!
I's a hard mommy.
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
Submitted by jussayin on September 18, 2008 - 9:52am.
you don't procreate if you're stupid
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Idiocracy
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Living on reds and vitamin C and cocaine All her friends can say is ain't it a shame.
Hey bitches, Brangelina have broken up, the loons are gonna freak lol
IV- hahaha! kittehs arr weeyud foah shoah!!
aww but I wubb demmm ♥
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
and a 3 year old brat would be alone with a kitten because?....
you don't leave pets and animals alone
you don't leave the bathroom open and the seat up around kids and pets
you don't procreate if you're stupid
captain obvious speaks....
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Hey I ain't trippin cuz the truth is really you don't know me- T.I.
Missy, don't feel bad. My kitteh won't drink from a water dish either. I even bought a bubbling cat water dish that costed $30 and provided clean water 24/7 and he flicked his tail at it. Now he demands I fill the sink or sometimes I catch him drinking from the bird bath. That the birds poop in. So, I don't think you're a bad kitteh mommeh. Kittehs are just weeyurd.
missy, I'm calling PETA! You bitch!
LOL
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"that is not a common looking vagina right?"
ders a pusseh in yer tolet
hez a bite yer azz
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
It was the kid! Kids are evil little fuckers.
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Clay pigeons are fuckers!
aw charlie is a cutie!! id adopt him!!
poor toilet pusseh!!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Shez kinda cute, love the voice y'all. NC? wherez dat? North Carolina? Prince of Tides?
Kids got a pumpkin sized head though! Daddy must be an ogre!