The Fertile Waters Of Kununurra
If you're in a rush to get knocked up, quickly head on over to the Australian town of Kununurra and dip your vagina in their waterfalls. You will be pregnant before you can say "botox." In an interview with Australian Women's Weekly (via AP), Nicole Kidman says swimming in the waterfalls of Kununurra might have had something to do with her unexpected pregnancy.
Nicky was in Kununurra to shoot the movie "Australia." She said six other women who also swam in the waters also got pregnant. "I never thought that I would get pregnant and give birth to a child, but it happened on this movie. Seven babies were conceived out of this film and only one was a boy. There is something up there in the Kununurra water because we all went swimming in the waterfalls, so we can call it the fertility waters now."
She went on to say that right after she put her ice cold vagina into the waterfalls, a friendly stork with a silly hat flew by and dropped Sunday Rose into her loving arms. A dozen fish jumped out of the water holding a bassinet made of crystals and silk. Then a magical mermaid touched Nicole's forehead melting away all the wrinkles. The rest is history....
Seriously. Nicole should be thanking Serta for her pillow baby.
Nicole went on to talk about her fairytale pregnancy. "I'm so lucky I'm so tall, so I carried small and also, I have to say, I had a birth that I was blessed with, a labor that was very good and a baby that was very good to me in that regard. To be given this again is a beautiful thing. To have raised Bella and Connor since I was 25 and now to be able to do it again at 41 ... wow!"
Cut to Nicole's baby oven screaming, "Bitch, please!"
What bullshit!
LMFAO @ you!! You are so fucking funny. I love, love, loveee this site!
This story reminded me of that wierd "hook fish" that swims up a man's peen.. eeek!!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgeDh1WCyeM
Silly me, I thought Keith's sperm had something to do with it.
i like that woman
shes a pretty good actress
and i like how she speaks
hahaha
www.MySpace.com/ItsJonaBitch
No, Nicky darling. It wasn't a magic waterfall. It was the IN VITRO.
MK, your are - quite simply - hilarious! How do you come up with this stuff? I'm still laughing over yesterday's post on the Empress of Lucite and now this? You make my day!
Great Nicole, way to go hun. Way to call your husband a useless prick without actually saying it.
Submitted by Madam Pince on September 24, 2008 - 10:12am.
"Cut to Nicole's baby oven screaming, "Bitch, please!"
Yeah, Antonia didn't think the L&D was that easy.
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There was a picture of Antonia a month or two before Kidman gave birth. Antonia was wearing a tight evening gown and there was no way in hell she was pregnant or had recently given birth. (And considering she has had 4 kids, I doubt she would have carried small.)
Regardless of what you think of Nicole Kidman, she WAS pregnant. If she were faking it, she would have overcompensated and strapped on a bigger belly a la the absurd (fake) bump Katie Holmes sported in the last 2 months of her never-ending pregnancy.
There really are no words...she's just a freak! Oh and those hands of her's they scare me...
Twat.
Magical mermaid touched her forehead...BWAAAA HAAAA HAAAA
I'm bored with you now.
She looks like Michael Jackson here..I don't have much else to say.
Oh Barf. Nicole carried small and had a small baby for her height because she starved herself. She gained 20 lbs and by the 6th month she was not even showing. Something is wrong there. She was doing hard core yoga up until her due date.
A fat chubby baby is always cuter than a skinny one. She probably already has the baby on a diet.
I had a baby 15 weeks ago and gained 50 lbs. I have managed to lose most of it already. My son is cute and chubby, was born 9 lbs and I would not have it any other way.
Lolo and the rest of the Nyers:
are you guys ok?
Still don;t believe she had that baby.
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You try to hide your lies, disguise yourself by living in denial;
But in the end you'll see- you won't stop me
-Christina Aguilera "Fighter"
"Cut to Nicole's baby oven screaming, "Bitch, please!"
Yeah, Antonia didn't think the L&D was that easy.
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Keep your muscles strong
Around your asshole
Keep your muscles strong around your brain
That way too much shit doesn't get out
And stops you sounding insane
Imagination is more Important than Knowledge
Nicole has a house here in Nashville and for the 2 months before she had the baby and then about 2 1/2 weeks after she had the baby she was coming to my gym to do spin class. She really was pregnant. She is very tall and very quiet but she was nice and we made small talk. She left town about 4 weeks after the baby was born but she really was pregnant.
I swam there too but I swallowed the water, so, no pregnancy.
Sheesh, do I have stupid printed across my forehead? Is there anyone who really believes this hooey spewing from her mouth???
Okay, it all makes sense to me now. It wasn't a pillow after all. She used "fertility water" to fill the water balloon "baby bump" that was under her shirt.
YES! NYC has shut our shit down yall!
Oh and I love the confused individuals walking around looking dazed and confused wondering whats going on. Watch the news hos!
All our shit is all crazy and you walk out your house int he morning all uninformed asking me if there is bomb threat times!
No bitch it aint a bomb threat!Kununurra is in town with all these Chinese peeps and we blocked the road JUST for your ass so we can go get you knocked up in the East River! Cause you is SPESHUL like that!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Submitted by snowpiece on September 24, 2008 - 9:15am.
yes Bushie pants is in town ~ what a drama! the cops stand there with their arms crossed and their ak47's or whatever hanging out....
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Tell them we don't wanna kill him, we just wanna slap him around and mock him until he cries. That's all.
Bella and Connor responded to this article by saying, "Who is this chick again? She's not referring to us is she? Have we met?"
I was stuck on in a cab on the 59th St Bridge trying to get in from Queens this morning. I was on it for like 40 minutes. It usually takes about 4 minutes. I also work on 1st Avenue, about 20 blocks from the U.N., so I'm gonna be pissed for a hot minute.
On subject, I'm happy for Nicole Kidman.
CTH I am not sure they aren't here too!
they better keep Sarah Palin's mooseburger ass protected is all I am saying, :P
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"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
Snowy
considering the bastard's approval rating, they should have called in the national guard.
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"wait! The lord is my shepherd but you're my ride home!"
yes Bushie pants is in town ~ what a drama! the cops stand there with their arms crossed and their ak47's or whatever hanging out....
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"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
I say NYC on the early show today, someone's in town and they pretty much shut it down??
on topic, Nicole is trying to spin that she raised the xenu robots? pluuueeze.
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"wait! The lord is my shepherd but you're my ride home!"
Apparently, she took a dip in the Fountain of Stupid while she was at it.
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You should only post on Farrah Fawcett threads, because you're as funny as anal cancer.
Last time I checked, her two other kids are at ages where they still need to be raised. To must have done a sweet number on her ass to get her to give them up.
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"There's a little bit of asshole in every nice guy, and there's a little bit of genius in every moron." - RDJ
Submitted by KD on September 24, 2008 - 8:01am.
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No, not up close and personal. They scare the crap out of me! Where I'm from, (relatively small town) the police don't even carry them. Told you I'm naive!!
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Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I slept with you because I was pissed.
And THIS is exactly why we need to stop making childless women feel that they are wrong or missing something.
IG- you've never seen a gun? I'm in the process of getting a permit to carry conceiled. I don't even have a gun, but my parents are pushing me to do it. I guess I know what I'm getting for christmas now.
That's gross. No wonder I don't like swimming. I like the beach, just don't like the water!
Snowy- stay away from the ones with dogs!
Submitted by Team Valtrex: "This only works if the water is teeming with semen. Just dunk it in the glass Travolta keeps his dentures in."
LOL. Oh no!
I think she has a Cabbage Patch doll wrapped up in that sling thing.
"When I die, Satan is going to weep, 'cause that bitch will know he is out of a job."
snowpiece
What's going on up there?
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"Who are you really, wanderer?" -- and the answer you have to give no matter how dark and cold the world around you is: "Maybe I'm a king."
It was both, snowy! A whazzup AND a whazzup? I dunno, it might make you feel safer. But I've never even seen a real gun, being the naive Canuck that I am. :)
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Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I slept with you because I was pissed.
@snowpiece good morning
You like? (roar)
fortress/armed/details?
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"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot".
Yes, and swimming near Lake Havasu can spontaneously give a person a cornucopia of STDs. It's a miracle and doesn't involve getting laid by strangers.
*cue Twilight Zone theme*
Perhaps the reason you had a baby, Nicole, is that you had sex with your husband.
Team V LMAO ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
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"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
IG: was that a general WHAZZUP or were you asking what's going on in NY? ♥ It's the UN GA but today there are tons of cops and dogs etc all over midtown..... me no likey, I have to pick up some trees today, LOL
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"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
The blind item about the mother who lets her nannies raise her baby 24/7 in a seperate house on her estate is definitely Nicole Kidman. She doesn't have a maternal bone in her body. I still don't really even believe she was pregnant!
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
http://www.myspace.com/rainbowsrule
I know you're watching over us, Pap. I love you, I miss you already.
This only works if the water is teeming with semen. Just dunk it in the glass Travolta keeps his dentures in.
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You should only post on Farrah Fawcett threads, because you're as funny as anal cancer.
Snowy, what's going on?
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Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I slept with you because I was pissed.
Submitted by SpunkyBrewster on September 24, 2008 - 7:47pm.
No it's :
Nicole, who are you trying to kid, man?
LOL stupit I know! ;)
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"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
she's not breastfeeding is she??? ;>
(yeah that's it, rub it in Tom's face Nik. :)you go girl/41??my last was 36))))you go. :)
;) :) :O =) :P :( :\ :D
GM IG Clarisse Silvara with the big white butt and all the rest of you hos
NYC is an armed fortress today! It's making me nervous! ;P
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"So I've learned to go get bigger thongs just to let people know I am wearing underwear. "
Nicole, who are you trying to kid?
I second Nicole's baby oven.
Bitch, please!
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"Who are you really, wanderer?" -- and the answer you have to give no matter how dark and cold the world around you is: "Maybe I'm a king."