An STD For Your Ears
Somebody actually let Wonky McValtrex back into the studio to record a new song. Whoever opened the door for her hates music and living things. Wonky debuted her newest skank tune on Ryan Seacrest's show on KIIS-FM this morning. It's called "My BFF" and it's dedicated to the leader of her mutant crab crotch army. They loves each other.
I shouldn't really say that this is Wonky's song, because it obviously belongs to Auto-Tune. Auto-Tune broke a fucking sweat and burned at least a million calories to make Wonky's tattered scab voice sound semi-decent. If Hannah Montana became a crackwhore hooker and was forced to record a song to get her next fix, it would sound like this. The best part of the song is robot lady saying "On Air with Ryan Seacrest" over and over again.
Click here to listen this mess after I gave it such a thrilling review.
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oh my fucking god, I guess she has no talent in the cock department either. I retract my statement. Jesus.
Submitted by Lisa Marie on September 30, 2008 - 3:24pm.
Unless a giant cock is involved, Paris has no talent at all.
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I've seen the tapes, even when there is a giant cock involved, the bitch has zero talent
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Oprah just patted her own vagina for introducing books to all of us through the power of TV
Submitted by PinkPostIt on September 30, 2008 - 3:55pm.
Ugh! I don't what's worse - Her dirty makeup or her dirty hair. Is using soap and water really too much to ask?
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Had to check the title to see which one we were talking about!
Submitted by oklahoma on September 30, 2008 - 3:46pm.
Tits, Did you jsut say, "shut up lezzie".. bwahahahahaaa.. shadduplezzie
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It's only what vicki pollard would say.
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=EzUniIMIuGU&feature=related
British chola extraordinaire.
Whatever, Aamyko! Besides, most straight guys would not be interested in seeing if you are right.
Submitted by NovaNightly on September 30, 2008 - 3:55pm.
raises hand*....i just bought a 4pk of her perfumes, on sale at JCPenney for like 15 bucks. Actually i really like Can-Can...it smells like cotton candy. Other than that, i despise the toad-woman.
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Hey, you're an honest slut. I'm not hating on that.
But I do hope you didn't pay the full retail price! Tell me it was on sale!
I really wonder, if she were inhabitting another body & saw herself out, what would she make fun of 1st? The fucked up fashion sense? The wonky eye? The boat feet? The giant man hands? It's amazing how shallow people don't see themselves realistically.
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"I'm intellectual & stuff." "You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue & stuff."
http://www.myspace.com/dramaqueen365247
Ugh! I don't what's worse - Her dirty makeup or her dirty hair. Is using soap and water really too much to ask?
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"Boo? Fuck You!"
-Chase Utley
Submitted by Green Is Good on September 30, 2008 - 3:52pm.
The only reason Wonky has another "album" (ha ha!)coming out is because she financed it herself. Apparently their are a lot of ass-hats out there who bought her perfumes and hair extensions.
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*raises hand*....i just bought a 4pk of her perfumes, on sale at JCPenney for like 15 bucks. Actually i really like Can-Can...it smells like cotton candy. Other than that, i despise the toad-woman.
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“Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark”
Oops, i just implied that i listened to the whole song...but i didn't. *shrugs*
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“Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark”
The only reason Wonky has another "album" (ha ha!)coming out is because she financed it herself. Apparently their are a lot of ass-hats out there who bought her perfumes and hair extensions.
Almost as annoying as the song itself was the overuse of "On air with Ryan Seacrest" throughout the whole damn song. The song was shit...btw.
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“Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark”
if people keep paying for it, she will keep em coming... i wish i had her looks, who cares about brains when your gorgeous!
The song sounded like it belonged on the soundtrack to a Pokemon/Teletubbies/Care Bears/Barbie movie (or some 1990's kiddie shit). WHAT THE HELL?
Her hands are really scary, btw.
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How can you thank God for a song that the Devil helped you write?
Submitted by TITS on September 30, 2008 - 3:46pm.
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so sad that looks continue to play such a large part in life after grade 8.
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Word. I snark here, but in reality I'm not a harsh judge at all. Gotta love who you are, ya know? (now someone will say I'm prolly ugly, which is okay, cuz no one needs to know :P)
Looks have nothin' to do with love either.
Submitted by TITS on September 30, 2008 - 3:46pm.
I like you more & more.
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"I'm intellectual & stuff." "You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue & stuff."
http://www.myspace.com/dramaqueen365247
I'm sure she must think she's a great lay but I think she has no idea to give head cos honey it takes a fag to give good head... sorry girls but leave the dick sucking to the gays.
http://www.aamyko.com
Submitted by TITS on September 30, 2008 - 3:43pm.
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HA! OMG! Now I wish I had seen it! Why would any guy who has seen that tape want to fukk her? Just cuz they can, I guess.
Oh, I licked your avie. It tasted like chicken.
Tits, Did you jsut say, "shut up lezzie".. bwahahahahaaa.. shadduplezzie
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Don't we make you Laugh??
Aren't we Fuckin Funny!!!?
Submitted by dramaqueen365247 on September 30, 2008 - 3:44pm.
TITS: It's funny that you say that. I've heard many men say that if you want to have a great time in bed, pick an ugly girl because she'll try twice as hard to please you.
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Men who would say something like that are only covering for the fact that they can't 'get' nice looking women.
so sad that looks continue to play such a large part in life after grade 8.
Like that bitch can even understand what time that clock says..
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Don't we make you Laugh??
Aren't we Fuckin Funny!!!?
Submitted by LT on September 30, 2008 - 3:33pm.
I freaking hate the damn wonky hahaha love the kathy griffin joke about her trying to go off stage hahaha!
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VIKKI!!!!! YabutnobutyabutSHADDUPlezzie
what joke?
TITS: It's funny that you say that. I've heard many men say that if you want to have a great time in bed, pick an ugly girl because she'll try twice as hard to please you.
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"I'm intellectual & stuff." "You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue & stuff."
http://www.myspace.com/dramaqueen365247
This song was so bad even the crabs fled for safety.
Submitted by speakit on September 30, 2008 - 3:27pm.
I doubt she knows how to work a cock either.
Vain women suck in bed, so I've been told. They think their good looks are enough. They are just HOT! Men should just be glad to get their dicks near them, or something.
For anyone who has seen her sex tape, was she any good?
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hah. you just answered your own question! don't you hate that? from what little i can remember i seem to recall she stopped 'performing' at one point to answer her phone/check it/text. she also primped for the camera. Best part was the guy had to take himself in hand a number of times to keep it hard. that's never a good sign.
Instead of singing about your best friend (and how very juvenile that is)how about going to the CVS or Walmart and getting some Vitamin E, Fish Oil, heavy hand cream, and some gloves and dealing with those dried out, crackly hands.
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http://www.myspace.com/oxygen162
She just needs to stop. Period. And execs need to stop feeding this beast!
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Carlos Mencia is a faux Mexican!
OMFG that song is so lame. The words - I mean seriously.
It's like junior school kids made a song.
End of.
Submitted by speakit on September 30, 2008 - 3:34pm.
Sure doesnt!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Jim has the uncanny ability to pretty much sum it up every time. Rich people in general make me sick right about now. I swear everywhere I look I see people with lots of money who certainly don't look any smarter than me and I just want to kick them in the face and scream "it should have been me" in their faces.
Is this song for her new "REALITY" show where she picks her best friend from a group of desperate pussy munchers? I saw the article for it on a London paper today......
http://www.aamyko.com
Submitted by LoLo on September 30, 2008 - 3:32pm.
she sucks at fucking but is known 'round the globe as a whore. THAT is funny to me.
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Practice doesn't make perfect.
I freaking hate the damn wonky hahaha love the kathy griffin joke about her trying to go off stage hahaha!
what an ugly ghetto chic diamond/swarowski encrusted crappy watch on her wrist. all that money and careless upbringing and a taste like she came from the powerty stricken projects of Chicago.
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*Power corrupts*Absolute power corrupts absolutely*
she sucks at fucking but is known 'round the globe as a whore. THAT is funny to me.
So why do people continure to stick their dick in her?
I mean its also known that she has herpes.
So i dont get it?
Thats like payin $1000 to use a dry slip in slide in your neighbors back yard and ending up buck ass naked in a fire ant bed
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Wow!
The marvels of audio wizardry,
Even I can sing like that!
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Pretty looks fade...dumb is forever -- Judge Judy
I WASTED A SECOND OF MY LIFE AND CLICKED THE SITE...WHO THE FUCK ARE THESE LOSERS JESSE MCARTNEY, BRODY JENNER, ASHELY SIMPSON ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME THESE 3 FUCKS HAVE AS MUCH TALENT AS MY CATS SHITBOX!! IT FUCKING PISSES ME OFF JACKHOLES LIKE THIS GET TO FUCK AROUND ALL DAY DOING NOTHING BUT WASTING THEIR(PARENTS) MONEY WHILE THE REST OF THE NATION IS FUCKING STRUGGLING...FUCK SEAFAG AND HIS BAND OF MISFITS AND NEXT TIME THEY ARE ALL IN THE SAME ROOM GIVE ME A CALL AND MY BAT AN I WILL MAKE A VISIT!!
Nevermind, TV answered my question. LOL
Submitted by Lisa Marie on September 30, 2008 - 3:24pm.
Unless a giant cock is involved, Paris has no talent at all.
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I doubt she knows how to work a cock either.
Vain women suck in bed, so I've been told. They think their good looks are enough. They are just HOT! Men should just be glad to get their dicks near them, or something.
For anyone who has seen her sex tape, was she any good?
Submitted by islandgirl on September 30, 2008 - 3:23pm.
If her hands are in that kind of a state, one can only imagine the state of her snatchal area. GAH!
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Thin women (and old women) know to hide their hands.
Saw Mary Louise Parkers mitts on weeds recently and they're just as ghastly.
Goldie Hawn is another one.
OMFG
That was fucking terrible.
~♥~Christina Agulilera Keeps Gettin' Better (Single) released Nov. 3rd!!!!~♥~
Submitted by Salem13 on September 30, 2008 - 3:24pm.
Thank the Lord for giving us the iPOD fuck listening to the radio (except the Classic Rock, Alternative station), I don't know how I lived without one.
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Let us all pray to altar of Steven Jobs.
Submitted by Lisa Marie on September 30, 2008 - 3:24pm.
I've seen "One Night In Paris". No talent involved there either.
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You should only post on Farrah Fawcett threads, because you're as funny as anal cancer.
STD for my ears?? yeah! I've always wanted a Six Tiered Dick? *voice trails off* ??? *giggles*
*runs out of room*
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Don't we make you Laugh??
Aren't we Fuckin Funny!!!?
27 seconds.
sounds like that other blond cunt.
Thank the Lord for giving us the iPOD fuck listening to the radio (except the Classic Rock, Alternative station), I don't know how I lived without one.
I can't believe she has fans do these people have any dignity? Really who wants to listen to this shit? I'm assuming its the same people buying Britney's and Miley's "music"
Unless a giant cock is involved, Paris has no talent at all.
Submitted by ChubbyWubby on September 30, 2008 - 3:22pm.
She might be in her 20's but her hands are in their 50's!!!! WTF must she do to those things???
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Too many handjobs, not enough lube.
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You should only post on Farrah Fawcett threads, because you're as funny as anal cancer.
If her hands are in that kind of a state, one can only imagine the state of her snatchal area. GAH!
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If you don't have a sense of humour, you probably don't have any sense at all.
Nice Vadge hands.