The Wind Is No Match For Joan Collins' Wig

Submitted by chichi on October 1, 2008 - 6:57pm.

Um, it's a blog. We're supposed to make comments.

*************
Don't dream it... BE it!

I used to think that when I got old, I would allow myself to be old. But now that I'm 49, I'm not so sure. Still, I wouldn't want to be a joke like her.

*************
Don't dream it... BE it!

I hate these old rich women, who wear fur, and 50 lbs of make up along with tacky wigs. Too bad the wind didn't blow her off her feet and onto her old cruella deville ass.

Hair or no hair she can still work it like nobody's biz. She should get Tyras number if Beyonce is too busy.

http://www.aamyko.com

I love Miss Collins. I love her glamour and that fact that her husband is about 30 years younger than her. I say good luck to her and all who sail in her, she is a credit to our nation. I love that fact that when she married said toy boy she was asked about age and responded ‘well, if he dies, he dies’ I also read an article where she talked about lipstick. She want on a bit about red, pink etc and then added that if you didn’t like colour you could wear clear lip gloss. However, if you didn’t like the feel of any lipstick on your lips then- ‘poor you, for you shall never be glamorous’ Splendid.
Maybe I am being naïve but I don’t think she’s had a face lift and I think her husband really loves her.
********************************************
We gladly feast on those that would subdue us.

Joan Collins, I love you. You will always be "The Bitch I Love" from the 80s. Two words: WIG GLUE.

There's plenty of women under the age of 30, who wear wigs.
As comparison for the age group: Dolly Parton, Tina Turner, Cher, etc...I'm sure they avoid having the wind in their face.

The hubby? Bet she had him sign a pre-nup. Kinda like what wealthy older men do, with younger wives. She's no fool.

I want wigs so I don't have to brush my hair. I'm lazy like that.

chichi -- Percy Gibson is Peruvian, what do you expect?

I can't believe the bitches here that go on and on here in the comments like somebody gives a fuck... get a clue and shut the fuck up!

The scandal in this story is Joan's "husband".... look at his face... male gold digger smegma. Ewwwww. Poor Joan. I hope she at least deserves it.

Bitch can afford a better wig

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

Joan knows how to work her shit. Even at 100 she is the best! ...or whatever her age is!.

The British/Europeans KNOW where to go to get the proper face lifts that keeps them looking like themselves. Why oh why do all the American skanks go to the cat doctor!

I'd give anything to find someone who does a good Joan Collins impression.

Joan does not believe in paying much for her wigs and that shows. It is unfortunate because she obviously goes to great lengths in order to look good. Which she does... except for the wigs.

I don't believe I've ever seen her without a wig. I wonder what her natural hair looks like?

Anyways, Joan RULES! I remember seeing her on Johnny Carson. Joan Rivers were subbing... She asked Collins to reveal who was her best lover, ever. Without missing a beat, Collins answered, "your husband, darling!"

Submitted by yepyepyep on October 1, 2008 - 5:15pm.
Talking about jewish my first memory of the trains in NY is holding on to my mom's skirt (I was tiny, like up to my moms knee she is 5'5") and staring at a pair of Hasidic Jews like they were freaks
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm 53 and I stare at them like they are freaks.
But keep that under your hat...it's just between you and me, 'K?

-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
OKAY AND SHE DOES HAVE A BOX WITH A DANCE BUT YOU CAN'T STOP HER BOOT CLAP WITH A BUTT SLAP!

Talking about jewish my first memory of the trains in NY is holding on to my mom's skirt (I was tiny, like up to my moms knee she is 5'5") and staring at a pair of Hasidic Jews like they were freaks, but when you are a toddler you can stare all you want
Frankly my dear, I don't give a Damn!! "Rhett Butler"

Submitted by Sandbitch on October 1, 2008 - 4:22pm.

Seriously, I have pics of jewish men with curls halfway up a mountain in my photo album..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
is that some kind of fetish you have?

-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
OKAY AND SHE DOES HAVE A BOX WITH A DANCE BUT YOU CAN'T STOP HER BOOT CLAP WITH A BUTT SLAP!

Hekki you would probably be fascinated by the Amish we have here in PA.

Like someone else said, even windblown and ancient, Miss Collins still looks better than any of these present day skanks so highly touted by the press.

the original...: Thanks for the info. I love gobbling up these little details. Seriously. I don't want to be spreading untruths (the lacy garters, etc.) if it's not the case.

Whose hair do they use for the wigs?

JOAN Collins even with a wig malfunction is more classy than Cheeto , Tater Head or any of these rest of these fugs of today .

LIVE for Alexis Carrington! VIVA Joan!

"Kristal's pretty, isnt she Alexis? Yes.. but only when she smiles.."

"It costs alotta money to look this cheap"-Dolly Parton

LOL

I did the tourist thing and went up in the palm springs cable car, along with a family of curly jewish people, speaking yidish. And they thought I was taking photos of the view outside...

Seriously, I have pics of jewish men with curls halfway up a mountain in my photo album..

Hekki UR welcome, it's quite scary!
****************************1/20/09
"We have your 401K. If you want to see it again give us $7 billion in unmarked bills"

Hekki-

I'm not too sure how much they wear the fancy shmancy underwear and bras... I'm part Jewish and have some crazy religious people on that side of the family and they have very strict undergarments they're supposed to wear. Much like their clothes are boring and understated, so are their undies.

They have to be made by special tailors and to specific rules, the fabric that they're made with has to be blessed by the rabbi, their never allowed to show the undergarments to anyone except every 9 months to their hubbies so they can have more kids.

My relatives don't follow these rules, but they're laid out in the Torah so the ultra-religious will follow them. Most Jewish people don't follow them because they're antiquated and are pretty similar to the Christian rules that state you shouldn't mix fabrics or use fasteners on any of your clothes (zippers are against the word of god).

I would be really surprised if the women spent their money on fancy undergarments because they wouldn't get anything out of it except shunned from their community... If anyone found out a woman wasn't wearing the proper garments, there'd be hell to pay.

I do know that they spend FORTUNES on their wigs though. Because they never show their real hair, even to their children, they make sure that their wigs are top notch. They're usually hand made, with real hair... they'd put Beyonce's to shame!

It's a really *strange* culture and I could never do it, but by turn I also couldn't be a fundamentalist Christian, or any other weird religious extreme. Agnosticism pretty much rallies against all that sort of stuff!

OT: For her age, Joan Collins looks pretty good. Two-thumbs up to her surgeon and makeup artist!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Your HR lady is a cunt." -Chris Ecclestons Concubine

Thanks, snowpiece! You're the best! I'm reading it now. *shivers*

i love you for knowing what a lace front is. my white ass totally wears them sometimes. served.

hekki:
Cover Story
Escape From the Holy Shtetl
Gitty Grunwald fled the Hasidic world her mother had fled to and returned to the lox-and-bagel Jewry of her grandparents. But the Satmars kept her baby. A Jewish-American tragedy spanning generations.

here's the article.....

http://nymag.com/news/features/48532/

****************************1/20/09
"We have your 401K. If you want to see it again give us $7 billion in unmarked bills"

Poor baby. Looks like her hair is going to fly right off her noggin. She's still a hot bitch, though. Hope I look as good when I'm her age.

snowy: Nooooooo! I missed that article. I'm gonna have to dig it up, stat!

My friend in Williamsburg is the one who told me about the peyess (the little curls they have), and I kept asking her more questions and she was exasperated and like "just because I'm Jewish doesn't mean I know everything about them!"

And the thing is, is that they've been around for a while, so they have the patina of legitimacy, but I think they're kind of a cult. They're totally insulated from mainstream culture and even other Jews, and I think they're extreme.

Anystew... Glad I'm not the only one. I'll walk past the 6 foot tranny in a plastic dress, but give me a gaggle of Hasids and I stare unabashedly. Once I followed a group of women and children 20 blocks up Fifth Avenue just to gather details about their clothes and behavior. (I was going that way anyway) I didn't understand a word they said, but they seemed pretty normal.

Hekki me too, I'm facinated also, LMAO re Daffy's I KNOW!

Did you see the article on the cover of NY Mag a few weeks back about the girl who "escaped" from them? very interesting, plus I later read it was the article that received the most mail in response ever in the mag's history. We aren't the only ones, LOL

****************************1/20/09
"We have your 401K. If you want to see it again give us $7 billion in unmarked bills"

Isnt she like 104? The way I see it long as she's wearing pants were good.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot".
"Cake heals all wounds"

If only she embraced reality I bet she'd be a stunning old dame, but she should have started 20 years ago.

Snowpiece: Yeah! Supposedly... It may be wrong, but I find them FASCINATING. The whole thing: the shaved heads, the million kids, the way they NEVER go anywhere alone. You will never ever ever ever see a Hasid woman alone. They will only hire Polish women to clean their houses, and they treat them like dirt. They won't hire dark-skinned people. Which I think is funny (ironic) because they are supposed to be the persecuted people, but they are terribly racist.

The women LOVE to go to Daffy's. LOVE it there. It's where I get to observe them up close. I am always tempted to try to watch them in the dressing room, because Daffy's has those awful cubicles with the tiny curtains. But I love to watch them. They're like another species, and while they are in the world with us, they are totally into their own little world. I've never spoken to one.

And my friend who lives in Williamsburg said the trannies have almost exclusively Hasid clients. The Hasid men aren't even ashamed to be seen picking them up.

that wig totally looks cheap...why wouldnt she spring for a quality lace front one? she can surely spare the $800.

Hekki yeah, I know, weird, huh?
But I think they are the ones who only have sexy times thru a sheet, no?
****************************1/20/09
"We have your 401K. If you want to see it again give us $7 billion in unmarked bills"

OMG I must have that umbrella!!
Speaking of wigs I've been trying to find a nice looking one for my mom for christmas, poor woman only has a few hairs left. I've been looking online but alot of them are really expensive.

-----------------------------------------------
So you’re talking someone that’s as stupid and talentless and messed up as Britney Spears cooking? Anthony Bourdain

Hasn't she ever heard of the Bandit hairband?

what strength of crazy wig glue does joan use to keep that wig on her head...barely...
_____________________________________________
if you don't want to be used, then don't be a tool...

My grandmother used to wear a peluca. She had hereditary thinning hair. Because my mom does, too, and I am TERRIFIED it will happen to me.

But if I DID have to wear a wig, I would get all different kinds and wear a Louise Brooks one day and a long blonde another day, and just switch it up to match my mood.

And you know what else freaks me out? Those Hasidic women who shave their heads and wear those wigs! They also wear those thick nude pantyhose and long-ass skirts. The receptionist at my old company told me that they look all dowdy (if you live in NYC you know what I'm talking about) but she said that they get custom-made schmancy lingerie and they obsess about wearing matching bras and panties and garters and shit under their drab homely outfits. True!

Ha ha, even this glamorous old memaw has age spots on her ancient forehead.

Sweeeeeeeeet
She is such a crazy bitch
______________________________________________
We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!

Whoa.