Thursday, October 2nd 2008
Dear CZJ, Your Make-Up Artist Screwed You Over!
Catherine Zeta-Jones showed up to the Global Leadership Awards Gala in NYC last night looking like she put on her own make-up using a jumbo piece of sandpaper. All that bronze caca on her mug makes it look like we can go rock climbing on her face.
When your face looks like Tommy Girl's ass after a 4-hour spanking party, it's time chop off the fingers of your make-up artist and stop getting Drano peels. And I'm sure looking at Michael Douglas' withering worm every day doesn't help.
Someone wax her forehead, and take a sandblaster to her face - it looks like leatha. I think it's a combo of sunstroke and alcohol poisoning; they do love the golf. You know, her teeth are more disturbing than anything. It looks like she has chiclet caps.
It looks like she couldn't get an artist and did it herself at the last minute, like Diaz does.
The whole thing is bad, spider lashes from gloopy mascara, blue eye shadow applied wrong, no zit coverage and then the bronzer. I'm not understanding why so much above her lip? Among other things...
Weirdest bronzer placement EVER. (But whatever you do, do NOT cover up those chin zits!)
Christ, it looks like she's been huffing brown spray paint out of a paper shopping bag.
Kiss,
Fifi
"Self improvement is masturbation. Now self-destruction..."
I agree FrappBloat. Looks like general coarsening of the features (my nose got much broader during my pregger times) and "the mask of pregancy" otherwise known as melasma in which your forehead, cheeks and sometimes the area beneath the nose develops a darker cast. Crying would definitely figure into it what with the hormones and all. Not to mention the breakout on her chin. Carrying a little one screws up your face temporarily. Forget glowing. Anyway Congrats, if we're correct!
"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning."-Catherine Aird
The look on Michael's face is priceless!
http://www.dlisted.com/node/28568/images/14123_jonescelebutopia3_122.jpg
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Hands off my popwreck!
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www.poorbritney.com
well applause to her for going out in public looking less than perfect. perhaps this will stop at least one teen from obsessing about appearances - if only for a little while.
This is the first bad pic of CZJ I have ever seen.
She's fallin' off!
Security!!!
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://societysex.blogspot.com/
Mornin, Angel. You know, I'd knock her ass down and steal her shoes if I got half a chance. Those shooz is smokin'!
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Did you say, "he was E-moaning?!"
Can I just say that the rest of her looks great? The dress, the shoes...even her posture.
♥ ThreadKilla!
New and Improved!!! Lean Like a Chola
Happy Birthday, Amy
Surprising because I've liked her as an actress since she was 19 and never saw a bad photo of her...til now.
yay.I AM, well, younger than her but damn my mother looks better than her!
Catherine used to live about 30 mins from my house in wales and in these she looks really upset. She's deffo been crying. If i had to take wild stab at it - she's pregnant early stages and suffering with morning sickness etc.
It's definitely some kind of procedure gone wrong, and she's tried to cover it up with bronzer (wtf?!!). I reckon she's had summat done to her nose and a face peel.
Submitted by betterthanyomama on October 2, 2008 - 11:46pm.
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I'm in a siggie! You are better than my mama!
Shit I thought that was Kelly Clarkston before I read the article. Karma really is a bitch.
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Kiss Kiss, BetterThanYoMama
"I like your posts but sometimes they make me feel like I'm on drugs." - by speakit on September 26, 2008
Submitted by SkyBitch on October 2, 2008 - 11:24pm.
I was hoping for jelly...but I can work with that.
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She's got BJ-chin.
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OK, I just talked to CTH's son on the phone and he said "My Momma hates me!". I think he must have scars or something. Poor kid!
***Submitted by MyTwoCents on October 2, 2008 - 11:18pm.
Thems fightin' words. *puts on bikini*
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*gets out the hose and starts spraying a pile of dirt*
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OK, I just talked to CTH's son on the phone and he said "My Momma hates me!". I think he must have scars or something. Poor kid!
I thought that was a picture of Rachel Ray!!! And she was flushed from making "stoup"
***Submitted by shocked on October 2, 2008 - 8:26pm.
She could be the new face of Bobbi Brown...
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More like BobbY Brown!
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OK, I just talked to CTH's son on the phone and he said "My Momma hates me!". I think he must have scars or something. Poor kid!
Submitted by sienna miller on October 2, 2008 - 10:58pm.
Thems fightin' words. *puts on bikini*
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Submitted by MyTwoCents on October 2, 2008 - 8:10pm.
Title says it all...and she really should wear a bra. That right one is going down faster that Sienna Miller.
YER GOING DOWN FASTER THAN SIENNA MILLER, HOR SLUT
Looks like she was trying to eat Michael Douglass' ass out before she attended this shindig! GROSS! That make-up bitch is SO FIRED!
Your face!
That's why you should always apply a little lipgloss...Also, the QT bronzer makes her look like W.C. Fields.
Submitted by NonnyMouse on October 2, 2008 - 8:57pm
I hope you guys are wrong because the thought of them having sex is absolutely disgusting, but unfortunately it makes the most sense.
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Love me or hate me
It's still an obsession
Love me or hate me
That is the question
And if you love me then 'thank you'
And if you hate me then 'f--- you'
Submitted by Mike Hawk on October 2, 2008 - 7:13pm.
WTF happened to her face?? That toad Michael Douglas has sucked all the hot out of her. Either that, or she's swollen with child again.
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I'm guessing it's exactly that. She's knocked up, puked before she left, and didn't have time to do anything but wipe her face and change her clothes.
Yeesh. She covered everything but her zits.
♥ ThreadKilla!
New and Improved!!! Lean Like a Chola
Happy Birthday, Amy
Awwwwww...and she brought her father along for the ride. That's very sweet of her.
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"Oh you little bitch troll from hell!" -- Patsy Stone
That looks like a do-it-yourself makeup job IMO; even her eyelashes look a little wonky, and no way a good artist would've missed the chin acne and whatever that is on her chest.
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Love me or hate me
It's still an obsession
Love me or hate me
That is the question
And if you love me then 'thank you'
And if you hate me then 'f--- you'
Eww, they look like they had a case of some flesh eating disease...*shudder*
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Love me or hate me
It's still an obsession
Love me or hate me
That is the question
And if you love me then 'thank you'
And if you hate me then 'f--- you'
She could be the new face of Bobbi Brown, natural and fresh make up indeed. She is a beautiful woman...but, holy Jesus! something went wrong, it's not only the terracota shit on her face...it's also the earrings, the dress...and what about those spots on her chin?? Finally that dead fish that takes her by the hand is a lovely finishing touch.
Maybe thats not her! Maybe its an alien imposter who didn't get 'the look' right?????
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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(='.'=)
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Maybe she's got a disease. I mean her nose looks like Rudolf. It could be a reindeer issue. Lets pray for her quick recovery
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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(='.'=)
(")_(")
Someone was fantastically fired today. Obviously CJZ doesn't remember what Samantha Jones learned about chemical peels. And why does her nose look like that? Is it just the ridiculous amount of bronzer, or did she get another tweak? The spider-leg lashes ain't doin' her any favors, either.
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MK thinks my baby is cute.
Title says it all...and she really should wear a bra. That right one is going down faster that Sienna Miller.
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My guess: She was crying and most of her make-up came off. That's the only explanation for those shrivelled stick lashes and the barely there but smudgey eye shadow (and crying will do exactly that). The only thing she had in her bag was bronzing powder and she applied it liberally. Not a good idea to put it on the end of the nose. Even in the unlikely event that someone had done a make-up job as bad as this, she never would have left the house. I mean, come on! Who would?
What's with the orange? How did she not see the cheeto dust?
Is she wearing the Olympic rings as earrings? Jesus Michael Phelps!
I think she is just showing her age.. in't she 50?
she's gotta cut down on the botox
this one def did her own make up in the car on the way over to where ever the fuck she is at. See it never pays to do your make up in the dark.
http://www.aamyko.com
HOT Men, HOT fun!
WTF happened to her face?? That toad Michael Douglas has sucked all the hot out of her. Either that, or she's swollen with child again.
Oh my god I am appalled at this make-up job. Poor CZJ
What's up with the bruise on her upper arm? She looks like she kissed her lipstick off on white oprah....
oh great...pass the eye bleach~
I am really into chemistry in films. She (IMHO) has had the best chemistry with Clooney. Way better than Julia ever did.
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Would any ladies care for some Spiced Wine? It is home made.
ShiningKnight on October 1
Now we know decisively that the natural look is not for everybody. Wow, I didn't know CZJ had that thin upper lip thing going on. I'm noticing more and more that quite a few people have very thin lips.
I couldn't help myself, I had to fix her makeup with photoshop.
Bad make up but, she is still beautiful
NOOOO. Please what happend? I blame her old man husband. I used to have a girl crush on this lady.
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Would any ladies care for some Spiced Wine? It is home made.
ShiningKnight on October 1
Smoking, drinking, too much sugar. She is a ball of inflammation. I sort of followed the Dr. Perricone diet and was exercising, and my pores disappeared. They weren't as bad as CZJ's here, but on the anti-inflammation program, my skin was stunningly almost perfect.
She needs to get on that.
I have never seen her look anything but drop dead g. This is baaad. I wonder if she really is 45 like all the tabs say and lying about her age?
Submitted by Le_CUNT on October 2, 2008 - 5:54pm.
if you are over 40, mineral makeup clings to pores
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Oh that is JUUUUUUST great...NOW you tell me.
*Throwing $200.00 worth of makeup back into the Nordstrom bag*
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OKAY AND SHE DOES HAVE A BOX WITH A DANCE BUT YOU CAN'T STOP HER BOOT CLAP WITH A BUTT SLAP!