Keanu Reeves Is Off The Hook
The poorest-looking rich person in Hollywood won some dumb lawsuit brought against him by a money-hungry pap who sued him for $704, 974. Alison Silva sued Keanu Reeves because while he was taking pictures of his homeless ass last March, he was hit by his Porsche. Alison claims his wrist is permanently fucked up and he couldn't work for a while.
During the four day long trial, the jurors heard Alison totally mess up his testimony by giving contradictory statements. Jurors were also shown a video of Alison using his effed up hand to climb a wire fence to get pictures of Our Lady of Cheetos. Keanu denied he hit Alison and said the pap was injured by tripping over his own feet while walking backwards. HA! Stupid pappie!
The jury was unanimous and it look them less than a day to decide.
If I was a juror on this extremely important case, I would only have two questions! #1: Why does the pap have a girly name? I bet his brothers are named Barbara and Karen. His sisters are John and Brian. #2: What does Keanu's beard have against him? It doesn't want to grow right! He obviously needs to be nicer to it.
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I would only have two questions! #1: Why does the pap have a girly name? I bet his brothers are named Barbara and Karen. His sisters are John and Brian. #2
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That's hilarious! Keanu IS hot! I fell for him when I saw "Speed." Yummy!
He is so hot,one of the worst actors but most gorgeous creatures ever!
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
◆◆◆◆◆ My friends describe me a soft, kind and sincere guy with good looking. I would like to meet a beautiful girl who knows how to treat his man on all sides. Feel free to contact me
on the famous online dating hub "☆★☆★__ K i s s MillionaireS . c o m __ ☆★☆★” Money is not very important
Keanu's looking a little messed up.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on November 3, 2008 - 11:01pm.
Submitted by Sandbitch on November 3, 2008 - 10:54pm.
Ooh, can we do obvious now? Keanu has Fraggle Rock hair.
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Kate Winslet was higher priority.
Submitted by Sandbitch on November 3, 2008 - 10:54pm.
Ooh, can we do obvious now? Keanu has Fraggle Rock hair.
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on November 3, 2008 - 10:50pm.
Um, ho's teef green...Yeah, nast!
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Took a while but yeah, nast. Some things are so obvious they can wait.
Um, ho's teef green...Yeah, nast!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by putsomestankonit on November 3, 2008 - 6:36pm.
@Louise Brooks, I was told by my ex it means someone who could really use a bath.
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As much as I loves me some Keanu, I will admit that when he's not working he looks like he's soap-a-phobic.
I think I secretly like stinky looking boys. The only time I ever found DiCaprio attractive is when he was all grimy looking in Gangs of New York.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on November 3, 2008 - 8:58pm.
On ElB: When AREN'T his off the charts. I sometimes seriously think he IS Eddie Izzard, he's just so freakin witty.
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I've often wondered that myself.
I just hope he never changes his avatar.
Submitted by TITS on November 3, 2008 - 8:50pm.
purrrrrrr
no gift, only glory. i think el b shoud have been the lone winner - he submission was off the charts.
.........
Jebus! Here, have this semi-used 'Horniest Slut Alive' trophy (Paris won't miss it). You can white out the title and put in "Bestest Winner Eva". :)
On ElB: When AREN'T his off the charts. I sometimes seriously think he IS Eddie Izzard, he's just so freakin witty.
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on November 3, 2008 - 8:07pm.
Submitted by TITS on November 3, 2008 - 8:01pm.
Hey Tits! Congrats again on the Caption This win!! Did I miss the prize giving ceremony? I hope you got big cash $$.
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purrrrrrr
no gift, only glory. i think el b shoud have been the lone winner - he submission was off the charts.
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hay Keanu:
need a shave much?
Submitted by TITS on November 3, 2008 - 8:01pm.
Hey Tits! Congrats again on the Caption This win!! Did I miss the prize giving ceremony? I hope you got big cash $$.
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
If anyone wants the hands just ask, and one of us will post it.
we also take requests - 'cause it's just so much fun!
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@Sayonara
I just put up the hands avi...secretly hoping Sandbitch would use them. And she fell for it, SUCKAH!!
Then Sandbitch, TITS, angel_i and myself have abused them to within an inch of thier lives!!
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
Reeves, the most boring, non-exotic Amerasian that has ever lived.
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on November 3, 2008 - 7:28pm.
Submitted by Sayonara on November 3, 2008 - 7:26pm.
I am pretty sure it is all TITS'S doing
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not this time - i only WISH i'd thought of it.
i think the blame goes to 2C and the aussie brigade.
the things that happen here at night!
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Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on November 3, 2008 - 7:28pm.
__________________________________________________
It is quite funny to look at as I scroll up and down the page.
Shame on you when you step up to... Brooklyn Zoo
Submitted by Sayonara on November 3, 2008 - 7:26pm.
I am pretty sure it is all TITS'S doing
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"Just when I think you are the shallowest man alive you manage to drain a little more out of the pool."
Submitted by angel_i on November 3, 2008 - 7:23pm.
Oh, I sent you hands alone... oopsies!
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
Hey why do you all have those crazy hands on your avatars? Oh and I see a headband, cowboy hat, and a red fro. Why? LOL
Shame on you when you step up to... Brooklyn Zoo
Submitted by TITS on November 3, 2008 - 7:20pm.
Submitted by angel_i on November 3, 2008 - 7:12pm.
OMG OMG Send me your Vanilla Ice Hands!
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you've already GOT them, silly billy.
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No - the ones you're making out of them!
There are SO many...tell sandbitchy too!!! Who else...?
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
HAPPYBMDAY!
Submitted by angel_i on November 3, 2008 - 7:12pm.
OMG OMG Send me your Vanilla Ice Hands!
*
you've already GOT them, silly billy.
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Submitted by MyTwoCents on November 3, 2008 - 7:16pm.
Submitted by angel_i on November 3, 2008 - 7:12pm.
OMG OMG Send me your Vanilla Ice Hands!
...........
I'm on my way! You can edit out your email now.
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S'ok. That's my cum dumpster;)
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
HAPPYBMDAY!
Submitted by angel_i on November 3, 2008 - 7:12pm.
OMG OMG Send me your Vanilla Ice Hands!
...........
I'm on my way! You can edit out your email now.
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on November 3, 2008 - 7:10pm.
was it as good for you as it was for me?
:)
...........
*snarrrrl...grrrr...gnaaashh....puff, puff*
;)
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
OMG OMG Send me your Vanilla Ice Hands!
thirteenangels@live.com
YAY!
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
HAPPYBMDAY!
He's always bugged me because he has little tiny rat eyes.
♥ I'm taking requests...♥
Submitted by MyTwoCents on November 3, 2008 - 7:07pm.
was it as good for you as it was for me?
:)
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"Just when I think you are the shallowest man alive you manage to drain a little more out of the pool."
Submitted by Sandbitch on November 3, 2008 - 7:01pm.
LOL! Haha Peekaboo Love Anderson!
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on November 3, 2008 - 7:03pm.
HAHAHAHAHA TASMANIAN DEVIL SEX
the best kind
...........
I'm picturing a little whirlwind followed by two cigarette smoking devils.
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
I really like Keanu. He can come over for a bath anytime.
Shame on you when you step up to... Brooklyn Zoo
One way devil populations are coping is by having sex at an earlier age, a study found earlier this year. The fatal disease strikes when devils reach the age of 2, which is about when they become sexually mature enough to breed.
HAHAHAHAHA TASMANIAN DEVIL SEX
the best kind
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"Just when I think you are the shallowest man alive you manage to drain a little more out of the pool."
Submitted by putsomestankonit on November 3, 2008 - 6:01pm.
Keanu is a soapy slapper.
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or -
He looks like a good bath would kill him
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Bye! Good
A guy named Alison tries to sue for having a limp wrist, that's just wrong..
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I'm more concerned bout bin laid off than Bin Laden
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on November 3, 2008 - 6:55pm.
@ Sandbitch
Tasmanian Devils Could Be Gone in 20 Years!!!!!
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Crikey! Shit I hate evolution. They be very ornery - skeeeery powerful bone grinding jaws.
Bye! Good
Submitted by gia on November 3, 2008 - 6:19pm.
he is getting kind of weird looking as he ages...not in a good way.
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it would help if he kept his trap shut.
Crazies are crazies. They're just looking for a target for their projections.--angel_i
Yup...devil facial tumor disease
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"Just when I think you are the shallowest man alive you manage to drain a little more out of the pool."
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on November 3, 2008 - 6:55pm.
@ Sandbitch
Tasmanian Devils Could Be Gone in 20 Years!!!!!
..
NOOOooooooooo. It's that bloody cancer isn't it!!
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, like you'll never see me again. I'm gone.
Submitted by Sandbitch on November 3, 2008 - 6:52pm.
*cough..look at my sig..cough*
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, likE YOU'LL NEVER SEE ME AGAIN. I'M GONE.
@ Sandbitch
Tasmanian Devils Could Be Gone in 20 Years!!!!!
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,446348,00.html
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"Just when I think you are the shallowest man alive you manage to drain a little more out of the pool."
Submitted by angel_i on November 3, 2008 - 6:31pm.
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aww c'mon. Keanu is probably one of THE only actors in hollywood who actually deserves a love fest.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on November 3, 2008 - 6:51pm.
Submitted by Sandbitch on November 3, 2008 - 6:06pm.
What virus?
ALL CAPS WART virus - chicaloca strain.
Submitted by Sandbitch on November 3, 2008 - 6:06pm.
What virus?
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Hats. If I ever see a hat on a bed in this house, man, likE YOU'LL NEVER SEE ME AGAIN. I'M GONE.
Submitted by angel_i on November 3, 2008 - 6:31pm.
Can I just say you guys are grossing me out with your little Keanu luv fest? EW! You love him so much, you can visit any one of Canada's most major cities and find guys like him are pretty much a dime a dozen.
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We are now accepting advanced bookings. Please have your credit cards ready.
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holy hammerin shit what the fuck is going on with KR's face. he's got more hair on it than a damn moehair coat.
___________________
Brenda: "he braught HER to my sons bar mitzvah"
Annie: "was she a gift?"
The first wives club
Oh my fuck he's great... I used to watch Speed and the Matrix for days when I was 10 and be in love with him. I'm happy he won.
http://www.myspace.com/12005637
more importantly
http://www.last.fm/user/sky_is_lovely
Submitted by angel_i on November 3, 2008 - 6:31pm.
Can I just say you guys are grossing me out with your little Keanu luv
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I'll stand in the picket line with you, angel.
No soapy-slappers for me. I like my filthy boys clean.
This post spoiled my breakfast.--loric
@Louise Brooks, I was told by my ex it means someone who could really use a bath. Its an English expression. He tried to get me to use it on a former co-worker who only bathed once or twice a week.
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And you will believe in love
And all that it's supposed to be
Just until the fish start to smell
And you're struck down by a hammer