Why Drag The Jack Russell Terrier Into This?!
One of these things is not like the others: a man with his penis in a pasta sauce jar, porn, women's stockings, a home-made sex aid and a Jack Russell Terrier. Can you guess which one?
All of these things were found in the car belonging to a man named Keith Roy Weatherley of Newcastle, New South Wales.
It all started when the police approached 46-year-old Keith's car, because he was parked in a no-stopping zone. They found him fucking a pasta jar, basically. Instead of inviting the nice officers to a spaghetti with extra cheese dinner, Keith sped off. He led police on a 10-minute car chase before finally stopping.
Keith still refused to get out of the car, so the police used batons (sexy) and pepper spray on him. That shit was probably making that horny bitch creamier in the genital area, because he kept butt fucking the jar! I say "butt fucking," because I don't think pasta jars have vaginas. The police were finally able to get control of Keith and he was arrested.
He pleaded guilty to to offensive behavior, resisting police and disobeying a police direction. He was fined $600 and convicted of the other two offenses without further action taken. He told the judge that he was just trying to make himself decent for the officers.
I couldn't find a picture of Keith, but I'm going to assume he looks a lot like this.
Keith should also have to pay for the years and years of intense therapy that Jack Russell Terrier is going to need. He won't be able to look at a jar of Ragu the same way again!
And now I know why Spaghetti Cat prefers to eat his spaghetti WITHOUT the sauce.
Thanks Shawn
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Mrs K. I feel ya on the faucet! My monster discovered that water also comes out of the glass I keep by my bed.
Now I just keep that topped-up and he's happy.
I think they need to feel that they're stealing it. Which is about right now that I think about it.
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Submitted by TITS on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:18pm.
Don't your cats sleep 19 hours a day, and pee, poop, eat and doze for the remaining 5 hours?
^^
*rolling eyes*
Well.
Diva likes to drink the water as it is coming out of the faucet. That is very trying. I have to turn it on and off.
Sexy Beast likes us to open the door for him to go outside even though we have a cat door.
Very demanding kittehs.
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When you can't lie to yourself, that's depressing.
It's all I can do to keep up with two cats!
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Mrs K?
Don't your cats sleep 19 hours a day, and pee, poop, eat and doze for the remaining 5 hours?
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This dog looks a lot like my Minch, and Minch could very possibly have some JRT in him.
But he is one lazy SOB
THANK GOD!!!!!!
It's all I can do to keep up with two cats!
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When you can't lie to yourself, that's depressing.
There should be laws against jar screwing....should only be allowed on the third Tuesday of the months ending in the letter "Y"....to answer the question are JRT out of control.....I have a JRT that I rescued and the answer is YES YES YES....they are wonderful but not for the faint of heart very smart and very active so you must be ready for a Tazmanian Devil on Speed!!!! But I love her....:)
Been there....done that...whats next?
Submitted by happytiming on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 11:19am.
It is a cute doggie. I like it so much.
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That's what pasta man said.
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"Michael Phelps - No. The body is sexy, but the face didn't get the memo."--MK
Poor guy. Too bad he didn't get help before taking it outside. The details don't matter.
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They were dork-sided!
Nasty bastard, why not be a sicko in the privacy of your own home?
Get that dog away from that psycho!
Submitted by LoLo on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:39am.
Well thats one way to earn your red wings.
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Hahhahhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaa
Just spit my sparkling fucking seltzer water on screen
*NO MORE beer for me*
I'm still a little bitter bout that ;)
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
♥"Late night sex, so wet and so tight"♥ T.I
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 12:49pm.
Submitted by TITS on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 12:48pm
ps wtf is a homemade sex aid?
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I do believe it is a jar of pasta sauce.;S
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I was fishing for a link - you know how hard it is to find anything with 'sex' in the search phrase!
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Submitted by Mel-Tang on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 11:47am.
I'm sure the Jack Russell Terrorist will be fine. Those little bitchez can be nasty!!
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True.
If i had a penis, I wouldn't dip it in sauce and then wave it around a JRT.
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Submitted by TITS on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 12:48pm
ps wtf is a homemade sex aid?
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I do believe it is a jar of pasta sauce.;S
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
How much you wanna bet he was actually delivering that pasta sauce to someone "special"?
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
Stop wasting my time with junk like this. Don't you have someone better to talk to? How about real people who are struggling to make ... oh. nevermind.
carry on.
naughty aussies.
ps wtf is a homemade sex aid?
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Jarred pasta sauce? Well, maybe I am a food snob, but if I had a peen I'd only fuck homemade pasta sauce.
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When you can't lie to yourself, that's depressing.
What kind of idiot has sex with a pasta jar without microwaving it for warmth first? Big dummy!
the DUDE! abides...
Some vaginas are as big as pasta jars!
Well, GAWD! We can all be for once since he wasnt' fucking that dog. I hereby submit that he just can't be that bad! I mean - it's pasta - it's ok; it won't need no therapy!
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
What won't a dude fuck??
A jar of spaghetti? How does that...what does that...why would he...? Oh, fuck it. That's what HE said.
((rim shot))
Submitted by Lydi on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:52am.
Oh the shame! I'm from newcastle.
I'm in L.A. Wanna house swap in winter? We have equally lovely beaches, with fewer known canned-food lovers.
Submitted by Lydi on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:52am.
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My Aussie Nanna comes from the Newcastle area and as far as I know she never molested a pasta jar either. *officially very uncomfortable with this post*
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Il n'ya plus que la Patagonie, la Patagonie, qui convienne à mon immense tristesse..~Blaise Cendrars
I heard he works at Olive Garden on the weekends.
The ugly truth about Jon and Kate Gosselin:
http://gosselinswithoutpity.blogspot.com/
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
I'm sure the Jack Russell Terrorist will be fine. Those little bitchez can be nasty!!
The ugly truth about Jon and Kate Gosselin:
http://gosselinswithoutpity.blogspot.com/
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
Submitted by Sheeps on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 11:16am.
Hey, it's their word choices. Aren't the waiters smug, anyway?
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Yes and on top of that here's an AMERICAN :gasp: not trying to speak italian ordering something from a different region...I'm not King RIchard but OFF WITH HER IGNORANT HEAD, he seemed to be thinking.
Alrighty, peace out everyone.
loozer!
I may never eat alfredo again.
It is a cute doggie. I like it so much.
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Catch hot babes, rich and sexy singles@MEET RICH. COM for hotter love, more pleasure, and more fantasy.
Submitted by gyeah on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 11:12am.
Hey, it's their word choices. Aren't the waiters smug, anyway?
Maybe i shouldn't judge him too harshly since i myself put pennies in my jar. badabing...
Just what about this story is unusual?
Just think, it could have been alfredo sauce-no physical evidence. Think of that the next time you are at Fazoli's.
http://i296.photobucket.com/albums/mm189/woofboy111/Food/fazolisfetticui...
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Sitting it out, spinning the dial
Thinking about the chump I've been
I have to smile,didn't I know Easy Come, Easy Go!
Reminds me of the movie "Best in Show" -- the blue/greyhound thingie-dog is neurotic because it watched his human parents screwing. The couple & dog all go to therapy together.
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LOL!!!! SHEEPS!
So basically i ordered a plate of hard dick (al dente) with pasta (or sauce) the way a whore would make it when i went to Italy the last time. No wonder the waiter gave me a hateful look like i don' la t conosce che cosa quello è prostituta...fuck me.
Drive by:
I've heard a guy friend of mine say about a woman, "Fucking her was like fucking a mayonnaise jar."
Maybe it was her monthly?
Have a great day, funnies.
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Vampire Bill is mine! But don't tell Viggo I said that.
Submitted by Sluttsville on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 11:04am.
The clam sauce.
The Jar - sounds like a good new contraception tool for hookers of all kinds.
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PSL, your doggy is cuter. ♥♥
Submitted by Sheeps on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:54am.
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*giggles* You said penne.
What I want to know is if the sauce makes a difference, is the 3 cheese better than the garlic & onion, or is the sausage & peppers the one that makes his sac react?
He was making a little sauce for his sauce.
Well, that jar was asking for it. Wearing the J.I.L.F. baby tee and looking all spicy and shit.
~*~Hello, my baby! Hello, my honey! Hello, my ragtime gal....~*~
Those JRT owners are a loopy lot!!
*side-eyes PSL*
I keed!
Submitted by gyeah on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:55am.
hahahaha. Yes. I will check, but I think it really comes from "putta."
Edit: The name originated in Naples after the local prostitutes, Pasta alla Puttanesca meaning "Pasta the way a whore would make it."
Hah I am no jar fucker..I'm a female so I certainly can't in the way this guy is..don't want to go into ways a girl could do it ewww. Also, MK left it out, this guy was parked near a really popular beach..who knows what he was looking at but I will never go there again!
Submitted by Sheeps on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:54am.
How else are you supposed to make penne pasta?
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I always did feel weird ordering the penne with puttanesca sauce
Submitted by Lydi on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:52am.
yeah, and you've been a member for four minutes, I call you JAR FUCKER!
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"I'm pretty sure I asked you to pick up some Pecan Sandies."
How else are you supposed to make penne pasta?
Submitted by Bondagebarbie on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:52am.
At least he wasn't fucking the dog but I don't get the jar fucking,where's the friction?
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True, that must be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway
huh?....what the?
Um...I'm sorry that is so wierd on so many levels.
At least he wasn't fucking the dog but I don't get the jar fucking,where's the friction?
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
Oh the shame! I'm from newcastle. I read this on our online news and was horrified when I saw the jack russel being in the car. We in Newcastle are not all jar molesters I assure you!
Submitted by LoLo on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 10:39am.
Well thats one way to earn your red wings.
L.M.F.A.O.
agree, picnic table fucker would kick this one's ass for him.
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"I'm pretty sure I asked you to pick up some Pecan Sandies."