Everybody Into Quarantine!
Wonky McValtrex and Benji Madden are reportedly no longer bumping ass warts which means they are out in the wild spreading their skank! While we're running for quarantine shelters, the bitches who make Valtrex are having a fun time parade! Their #1 converter is going back to work!
According to Star Magazine, Wonky quit Benji because he's too-controlling. When he found out that she was being gross with Nachos in Miami, he freaked out at her. Benji totally did the "smell the puss" test on her.
The source said, "She couldn't take his overbearing ways anymore. It was stressing her out. He can be very aggressive and he was just too much trouble. She felt she couldn't cut loose and party. He doesn't drink and doesn't think she should either. She felt too fenced in."
I think in Wonky-talk "fenced in" means that Benji wouldn't let other dudes space dock her.
Benji apparently is herpmatized, because he wanted a second chance from Wonky. "He fought for a second chance and asked if they could talk it out but Paris said she was done talking." That's because she probably already lined up two dozen rebound dicks.
You know that somewhere in the world Nicole Richie is eating her one chickpea lunch and screaming "Halleljuah" because she doesn't have to see Wonky's skank ass face at Madden gatherings anymore. It was bad enough that she had to play fake nice with her for the cameras.
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Submitted by putsomestankonit on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:26pm.
I'm confuzzed there's a doctor in the thread performing surgery on themselves??
*pulls hand out of pants*
Ummm no thats not what i was doing. Sorry ;)
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Submitted by ricki lake on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:25pm.
PS LoLo I am in Astoria. I will take my nug now. Thanks!
*sssssssss* WHOOOOOOOOO
YAY !!!!!!
ha ha ha ha
Im not kidding though i think it would be fun to smoke and shoot the "shit" with you. I wont space dock you or nothing. Promise.
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
Somebody riddle me this. Why does the turd have to be frozen? That could be uncomfortable. Why not get a turd donation from someone chronically constipated?
A constipated turd is hard as a rock. Trust.
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Submitted by la coocaracha on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:05pm.
Submitted by Mrs. Gosling on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:58pm
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you is chipmunkin times all up in my face and i hate that, you trampy nut gathering woodland creature. (LoLo)
I'm confuzzed there's a doctor in the thread performing surgery on themselves??
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http://scarletwordsandthoughts.blogspot.com/
A place for book lovers
space docking will make you think twice the next time some ho says " sexy as shit"
I had a dude say i was "sexy as shit".
I was expecting to turn around and find a super slutty turd in a mini skirt behind me, but nope it was just me and a red neck talking about stuff that was also "sexy as shit".
Glad i didnt kiss the fella if he was really talking about space docking. YUCK!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
PS LoLo I am in Astoria. I will take my nug now. Thanks!
*sssssssss* WHOOOOOOOOO
"it" is a raging BITCH.
I have not called anyone idiots. I wasn't even addressing any of you with my original post! Yes, Paris has been photographed smoking pot and drinking, but not in the ways that, say, Lindsay has (passed out on a car, stealing a car, etc) My only point was that she doesn't seem as out of control with it as most of them do, not that she's an abstaining angel. I may be angry, but again, like I say every damn time, at least I can admit it. Physician, heal thyself!!!
Yay!! Lolo I fucking like to fucking curse like fucking all the fucking time and shit
My momma used to call me potty mouf when I was fucking little and shit, look ma I'm still a toilet mouf fuckity fuck fuck. giggity
◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘◘
"I want to fuck my way to the garden,
cause everyone needs a mother fucker!" SOAD
*closes browser with Urban Dictionaries defenition*
*yacks up sushi lunch*
WTF do people play with their and other people's poo?
Seriously. Poo should not be handled, played with, eaten, swam in, included into sexytimes.
*returns to vomiting*
Well the Valtrex stock is going to skyrocket now...
^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^
All we are....is dust in the wind, dude.
-Ted "Theodore" Logan
*doing the happy dance, just enough $ in my pocket to get a 40 for the ride home*
gotta run, Ladies, have a good night!
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"Waaaarrrrrriiiorsss, come out to pla-ay!"
*clink clink clink*
Clarisse
You are all bagina hags! Go lick the television when pictures of food pop up! I bet you dry hump TGI Fridays ads in your Us Weekly magazines you horny zit faced bitches!
ha ha ha i like cussing SOFUCKINGMUCH!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
GIG - my SIL just sent it to me. I just about died laughing.
LoLo,
I absolutely agree. I have read some great posts from it, but they are easy to forget when it's goes into ragin "you are all idiots" mode.
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"Well, it takes more energy to frown than it does to smile."
"Yeah, you know it takes more energy to point that out than it does to leave me the fuck alone?"
Submitted by Bondagebarbie on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:13pm.
As far as I know space docking is turding into a woman's vajayjay.
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*blinking*
wha?
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
When you can't lie to yourself, that's depressing.
Good Charlotte is popular?
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http://scarletwordsandthoughts.blogspot.com/
A place for book lovers
As far as I know space docking is turding into a woman's vajayjay.Wonky would totally go for that action.Nacho's and Benji could have double teamed that ho.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
Whew! I was worried that she'd be the Yoko Ono who brings down Good Charlotte at the height of their popularity.
M.E., my friend sent me that joke too! Definitely slayed me!
Love the "one chickpea lunch" thing.
Unfortunately for the people currently in Parasite's and Blohan's inner circle, they've lost most of their celeb-magazine story value and unless they make changes and make some big changes now, people are going to stop caring about them all together. Should be fun, (and profitable for Michael K.)
Clarisse Im not even joking either!
The thing is the dude can be really smart and thoughtful but he just has these days (we all get like that though) where its like he is just mad at everyfuckingvaginaintheworld.
BRING BACK SMART RICKI!
REVOLUTION AT RICKIS HOUSE!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
OMG! THis just got sent to me and I just about died laughing:
Tragic Loss:
Please join in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community.
The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma
complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was "71".
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities
turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry
Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and
Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a
man who never knew how much he was kneeded.
Dough boy rose quickly in show business, but his life was filled with
turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of
his dough on half baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times,
he still was a crusty Old man, but was considered a positive roll model
for millions.
Dough is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough,
Jane Dough, and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also
survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes
Submitted by Sugaroo on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:07pm.
Look at her hand in his. The distance between her thumb and the tip of her forefinger is a mile.
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Deep, deep, deep hole that G-spot is hiding in!
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"Waaaarrrrrriiiorsss, come out to pla-ay!"
*clink clink clink*
Jeffro,
P'shaw! The only thing i bogart are the chocolate covered potato chips!
LoLo,
Preach it's sister!!! Preach it!
Submitted by DreamyAguileraEyes on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:02pm.
As if Space Docking wasn't gross enough...
Space Dock Fondue
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So thats what thats called. ME and this girl with LL tattooed on her ass did that with a samRo look alike wilmer Valderamma. That shit was tight!!! It was sooo much fun....I suggest everyone try it! Its not as gross as it sounds......trust me.
( * )( * )( 0 )( 0 )( o )( o )( ^ )( ^ )( < )( > )
creeps up behind me and shes like YAAAHHHH!
Look at her hand in his. The distance between her thumb and the tip of her forefinger is a mile. Bitch doesn't have fingers - she has branches.
Submitted by ricki lake on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 5:02pm.
Um, I said "out of control." But lemme guess, everyone who has ever done a drug is a crazy junkie slut to you, right? Shock. I always forget everyone is perfect here lol.
DAMN RICKI!
If you are in NYC I swear to god I will donate one of my finest nugs to the CHILL THE FUCK OUT FOUNDATION in your name.
Seriously, i get great pot and i will smoke it wiff you for your calm down times you fucking slut!
GWAD! GWAD DAMN IT! LMAO!
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
All that money. I just don't understand why she doesn't get her damn nose fixed. I'd hate her like 1% less if she'd just fucking do it.
Submitted by Mrs. Gosling on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:58pm.
Seriously....I wonder who gets off on space docking?? Lmao that is so effin weird
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I found 2 definitions for space dock
1. an uncircumsized man putting his foreskin over a circumcised mans head thus joining thme together
and
2. Sticking a frozen turd in a womans vagina
Those are two very different things...how can they both have the same definition?
( * )( * )( 0 )( 0 )( o )( o )( ^ )( ^ )( < )( > )
creeps up behind me and shes like YAAAHHHH!
http://www.playusout.com
As if Space Docking wasn't gross enough...
Space Dock Fondue
A variation on the classic "Space Dock", generally reserved for party situations. Here, one female is chosen to serve as the "fondue pot." One male, who has taken a gentle laxative, shits watery diarrhea into the woman's vagina, thus filling the "space dock fondue pot." Next, each man at the party takes turn in dipping his hard pole into the fondue pot, coverinig it with shit. Finally, each man's partner licks the feces off his shit-encrusted cock, as if it were a chocolate covered banana.
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
~♥~My Blog ~ Twisted Rainbow Dreams
http://twistedrainbowdreams.blogspot.com/ ~♥~
Twisted Rainbow Dreams - The Website
http://www.freewebs.com/twistedrainbowdreams/index.htm
Um, I said "out of control." But lemme guess, everyone who has ever done a drug is a crazy junkie slut to you, right? Shock. I always forget everyone is perfect here lol.
Submitted by devilgirl on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:58pm.
Rikki Lake- Do you have something against out of control substance abusers?Darn, I guess we can't be pals.
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Oh well...pass the bong devilgrl...skip Clarisse and Okie, they tend to bogart. LOL
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"Waaaarrrrrriiiorsss, come out to pla-ay!"
*clink clink clink*
This is almost word for word what was said back when she broke up with Nick Carter...."too controlling, agressive, yada, yada.." Hon--it ain't these guys that are the problem--its YOU.
HER STUPID GODDAMN SKANK ASS SHOULD HAVE BEEN FUCKING THANKFUL SHE HAD AN ASSHOLE WILLING TO DO IT.
OK CHARLES MANSON WE ALL KNOW PARIS ASS HOLE IS ALWAYS A READY WILLING AND ABLE ANUS.
IM SURE SHE IS THANKFUL THAT HER ASS HOLE DID NOT PUT UP A FIGHT WHEN HELLEN MIRREN WAS DEMONSTRATING GOOD TOUCH AND DATE TOUCH.
WHEAN ASS HOLES FIGHT BACK: A STORY OF LOVE AND UNDERSTANDING
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We is tailing jokes in hair twoday!
I want to rub vaginas with Paris Hilton. Can anybody hook me up?
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Aki Hoshino Gallery
Seriously....I wonder who gets off on space docking?? Lmao that is so effin weird
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I love him ♥
Rikki Lake- Do you have something against out of control substance abusers?Darn, I guess we can't be pals.
Guys - I honestly don't think they were ever really dating.
Let's talk about Paris. She had a show that just came out call My New BFF. She is a very shallow person who does not like to be seen as having any kinda weakness. She went out with those girls, was photographed all over the world, went to parties, etc. and she even had PEREZ HILTON interview them. UGH. Of course, she can't be single! What if one of her BFF constestants had a boyfriend?! How could she be superior in that light!?
As for Benji, well - who the hell is Benji, right? Except NOW he's Paris Hilton's ex. It totally makes sense they were all hanging out together and decided for publicity's sake it would be a good idea because really - if she was dating Benji, wouldn't Nicole STILL make the best BFF? Instead, Nicole seems to be increasing the distance between them on the daily.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Chola Diary , Lean Like a Chola
It's Britney, Bitch!<
Submitted by Mrs. Gosling on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:40pm.
Submitted by la coocaracha on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:38pm.
You used to love Tara Reid??? Por que???
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I thought she was the most beautiful girl in american pie....I thought she had awesome potential....I would have never in a million years thought shed of turned out the way she did.
( * )( * )( 0 )( 0 )( o )( o )( ^ )( ^ )( < )( > )
creeps up behind me and shes like YAAAHHHH!
*barfs* at what Space Dock means. Wrong, so wrong.
~♥~My Blog ~ Twisted Rainbow Dreams
http://twistedrainbowdreams.blogspot.com/ ~♥~
Twisted Rainbow Dreams - The Website
http://www.freewebs.com/twistedrainbowdreams/index.htm
That's just the stupidest and worst picture I've ever seen of Wonky. Benji should be relieved to be done with that skank-whore. She is infested with herpes, I should know, I used to infect her in the good ol' days! Ahhh, how I miss that crazy Tinkerbell? (I haven't seen her in ages, is she even alive?!?!)
Your face!
SHE SHOULD BE GODDAMN FUCKING CONTROLLED. SHE NEEDS TO BE CONTROLLED. A LOT OF THESE STUPID FUCKING CUNTS NEED TO BE KEPT ON A LEASH AND FORCED TO WALK THE FUCKING STRAIGHT AND NARROW. HER STUPID GODDAMN SKANK ASS SHOULD HAVE BEEN FUCKING THANKFUL SHE HAD AN ASSHOLE WILLING TO DO IT.
Submitted by Sugaroo on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:51pm.
Submitted by ricki lake on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:49pm.
I don't think she's a crazy out-of-control substance abuser like a lot of them.
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Guess you missed the vid of her smoking hash. Or the one of her grubbing on the floor for the shrooms she dropped. Or the pic of her MK posted a few days ago wiff Nachos in Miami, clearly drunk off her ass.
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You forgot the pics stolen from her storage space. One with her and Nicole grinning for the camera with a HUGE plate of coke infront of them.
why do people still care who paris is fucking?
this skank has seen more dick than men's room urinal.
MK I have to say, I laugh at nearly all your commentary, but this was one of the best...you are tooooooooo damn funny dude! lololol
Submitted by The C word on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:48pm.
Submitted by putsomestankonit on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:47pm.
I think he broke it off with her when the tests came back positive.
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I think she broke up with him when his penis fell off.
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I think he broke it off when he fell in her vagina during sex and was lost for 2 days.
( * )( * )( 0 )( 0 )( o )( o )( ^ )( ^ )( < )( > )
creeps up behind me and shes like YAAAHHHH!
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:37pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 11/19/2008 - 4:35pm.
STOP VISITING HIS PAGE!!!!! Why give him the revenue!
On topic: Such a shame that the crabs have lost their dad.
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In my own defense, I went there only because someone told me about it and I wanted to see for myself.
*bends over*
*pulls down pants*
*awaits spanking*
Benji is too controlling?
Couldn't be that Fuckass is a giant slut hole could it?
Or that she works guys like Kirstie Ally works a Banana Creme pie?
No, it's always the guys fault with Fuckass.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!