When Two Douchebags Become One
Do you Twit take Twatty's fleshy beard to be yours for at least another 15 minutes? GROSS! I'm actually kind of shocked that Heidi and Spencer managed to get married without at least 30 staged photo shoots leading up to the nauseating day. I mean, where were all the "Twit and Twat go to the caterers" or "Twit and Twat go to pre-wedding counseling with their priest" shoots? Or better yet the "Twit and Twat get their genitals cut off so they can never procreate" photo shoot, because she's looking a little on the preg-preg-pregnant side. I can't even type that shit! If she is carrying the spawn of Spencer, then it really is time for the world to end. That's it, we had good run, but this madness cannot go on! Jesus, please push the button!
Anyway, everyone's least favorite famewhore douchebags eloped on November 20th in Mexico and UsWeekly just happened to be there to document the whole thing....and give them a big bag of cash as a wedding present. If you're feeling a little bloated this week, then just flip through this magazine and you'll shit and barf up everything in your system at once. Bloat gone!
Visit ONTD to see the rest of the pictures and equally gross quotes. I'm feeling like I should go and lay my head on the toilet for a few fucking lifetimes.
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shes SO preggers!!!
the chi-chis are looking larger than usual, and shes wearing a damn tablecloth
plus twit&twat have been laying low for the past few weeks...
Who cares? Oh yeah, those tweens. Tweens have more money than me these days. They'll snatch this issue up. Damn them!
Then I went back to having lunch.
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A place for book lovers
*yawn*
WHatever.
Maybe it's cuz a Mexican wedding isn't valid in the US? They can just say "never mind" at some point?
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I made a snowman and my brother knocked it down and I knocked my brother down and then we had tea.
Aaaaand nobody cared.
Jesus christ, it's the double fug issue!
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The next time you have a thought...LET IT GO.
I'm sure they'll have more "wedding photo shoots". See the clue at the bottom, how much you want to bet they wed again for their family? And then there's the honeymoon, the sex tape, the shock that they can't beleive they got Pam&Tommyed, etc, etc.
I don't think these two are even beyond cheating on each other just so they could have "photo" ops. Pathetic.
MK, anything we can do so these two don't procreate? I just had a terrifying vision
That's the melody to funky town!
God, reminds me of my wedding. I looked into my husband-to-be's eyes and said "I'm ready to lock you down."
*dabbing at tears*
oh no please somebody sterilize those too immediately
Hahahaha this is the douche with the flesh colored beard from the soup!
That's the melody to funky town!
Pass