Knut 4 Sale
When Knut was born, his skank mother rejected him, because she's a dumb whore. He was raised by his zookeeper, Thomas Dörflein, and quickly became an international superstar. Knut was on the cover of Vanity Fair, had toys made after him and was the subject of several books and DVDs. Because of his fame, the Berlin Zoo's attendance increased by 30%. Knut had it all.
Then he got older and had to bid farewell to his mommy Thomas. Thomas later died of a heart attack in his apartment.
And if that's not bad enough, the Berlin Zoo has put Knut up for sale because they simply can't afford to keep him. They say that Knut wants coochie and it would take $13 million to find him a female polar bear and build a home where they can do it in.
One of the head zookeepers said, "It's time for him to go - the sooner he gets a new home the better. Anything else would be financially irresponsible."
Er. Wasn't it financially irresponsible of the zoo not to use Knut's money properly? He made that joint millions! Now they are just putting him out, because he's no longer young and cuddly anymore.
Poor Knut. We know how this is going to play out. He's going to go off and get some floozy knocked up. Then he will turn to crack when the pressures of fatherhood becomes too much. Knut will whore around for a few years and maybe star in a couple of reality shows like Knut of Love. Then when it's all become too much Dr. Drew will take Knut in and clean him up on "Celebrity Rehab." Your typical child star story. Save Knut!
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Germany bashers you all can relax, he will be staying in Berlin just move to another zoo where he will have a bigger compound and can make "cootchie".
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Nothing is worth more than this fish
Knut
Snowblood:
Sick Kitten has been looking for you.
She showed up on my myspace page, absolutely convinced we were the same person.
She told me this odd story about Celebitchy etc, I'm sure you know the details...
Sorry that happened to you, anyway, I'll tell her I found you, if you haven't already.
Poor Knut. It really would be sad if he ended up not being taken care of.
I still say Knut for President!
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Wyle E Coyote
"And I'm sure the bitch... was arrested for attack with a deadly gorgeous eyebrow.", MK.
Where do I go to bid on him?
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People Suck!
calling Nuremberg Zoo! Flocke, their unwanted polar bear girl baby is now 11 months old. She's in good health. Do you think they could get together? Both rejected by their mothers.....see Flocke here:
http://www.nuernberg.de/internet/eisbaer/videos.html
Are you folks going to make a fund for Knut? I'm in if you do...Michael K. are you listening?
BASTARDS!!!! Animal experts knew this would happen that's why they said it was wrong to artificially raise Knut. May they all rot in hell.
Child stars like Knut should go to "Big Brother House" with Lassie, Benji, and Chester Cheeto.
"Typical child star story."
lmao
Everything is disposable to us now.
(<_>)
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Ein minuten bitte! Ich habe eine kleinen problemo avec diese religiones. (He was from everywhere)
I just really hope this poor creature doesn't end up in the hands of people who will abuse him. He can't help it if nature takes its course. And MK is right - where are all of those millions they got exploiting the sweet thing?
Submitted by FrappBloat on Fri, 12/05/2008 - 6:21am.
It amazes me that MK always calls the mother names, it's so rediculous. I know he's only joking, but its silly as it's obviously a breeding zoo problem. Not the bears. Duh!
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Maybe Mk's got inside info on the mom that we don't know about...LOL
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"Hahaha....you are eating my caca and paying for it. Meeeeow." No gracias. MK
As cheap as Berlin is, this makes all the sense in the world.
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://www.myspace.com/triston
Zoo's swap and change animals all the time. It's part of the breeding programme. Chances are they're making a big deal of this and going to the press because they know people will visit in droves to see him "one last time". I bet it's features on German TV news etc.
I think it's good they're advertising him for breeding purposes. What is rather odd is the report. They bred Knut in the first place, so evidently have bred polar bears in the past. Maybe they have learnt their lesson and decided not to breed again as the facilities resulted in Knut being abandoned. Strangely, polar bears don't abandon their young in the wild. Chances are the zoo is not up to par and the mother was stressed. It amazes me that MK always calls the mother names, it's so rediculous. I know he's only joking, but its silly as it's obviously a breeding zoo problem. Not the bears. Duh!
You're right MK. The zoo made millions whoring him out to the entire world and now they can't even build him an igloo and give him a female polar bear? I know they made more than $13 million off of him. That's really horrible when a zoo turns their back on an animal they raised so he can never fend for himself if they send him into the wild.
Maybe Sharon Stone would be interested?
FUck you germany, im ashamed to be German now.
Du solltest Dich echt was schämen!!!!!!
I agree with you angel if they are treated well and are happy , I see nothing wrong with it. But there needs to be positive proof they are being treated right. WOW there is nothing cuter than this precious Bear!
I just used a stuffed Polar bear a few weeks ago in my class to make a "window" for a fake store for a project to model a scarf. Didn't want to use a manican (spelling) so I used a big stuffed polar bear.
Angelina doesn't care about poor foreign animals, only foreign kids.
FUck you germany, im ashamed to be German now. JK....seriously, I hate stories like these it just makes me so sad, I hope the bear ends up ok and in a good home =(
Submitted by stake_spike on Thu, 12/04/2008 - 10:11pm.
Come on San Diego or NYC step it up and adopt him. If those people at the Berlin Zoo really cared they would let him go to a home with a female polar bear for pennies, not be trying to sell his ass for $13 mill. Greedy bastards.
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They are not trying to sell him for 13 mill... it would cost them 13 mill to provide him with a female and adequate living quarters.... I went on a German News site and it said that they feel that his purpose is to "make babies" and that can not be accomplished in Berlin. Thats why they try to move him to another zoo that has a Lady for him. I would still love to know where all that money went they made of his little white furry ass......
It's not like the Berlin Zoo is some tiny zoo. I'm guessing because Berlin is such a big city they have money. Maybe they're just pissed because he's no longer their cash cow.
Come on San Diego or NYC step it up and adopt him. If those people at the Berlin Zoo really cared they would let him go to a home with a female polar bear for pennies, not be trying to sell his ass for $13 mill. Greedy bastards.
Submitted by Deb on Thu, 12/04/2008 - 9:18pm.
On the serious tip, I'm gonna say some stuff that will definitly piss off PETA, but also others.
I don't see what is so bad about animals living in captivity, IF they are treated well.
Why should they go back to the wild in every case?
Many of us have animals in our homes. As long as the people and animals involved are happy, why fuck with that
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You take one look at the Gorillas in the Toronto Zoo and you know they're not all happy like that. THAT is the hard part. But, for the rest of it, I agree. Sometimes animals think we're cool and want to hang with us - it's no biggie.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Youtube Gallery
Love Anderson's idea is the best!! KnutCam!
Fucking cold-hearted bleedin' Germans. It's amazing how much money that bear made for that zoo, and now they are finished with him and need - more money? Jesus. How disgusting is that.
Hmmm...
Knut needs a home.
the shiba inu puppies are leaving...
I think I see a solution here.
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You JJers don’t mind if I remove my panties as I type this do you?… TL incatneato.
the Berlin Zoo should be sued for SOMETHING. probably neglect, abuse, exploitation of a minor(animal). ???? something.
Submitted by Deb on Thu, 12/04/2008 - 9:18pm.
exactly.. and there is no frozen wild for the polar bears now.
~~~~~~=^_-=~~~~~~~~
"Santa baby, I wanna yacht,
And really that's not a lot,
Been an angel all year,"
On the serious tip, I'm gonna say some stuff that will definitly piss off PETA, but also others.
I don't see what is so bad about animals living in captivity, IF they are treated well.
Why should they go back to the wild in every case?
Many of us have animals in our homes. As long as the people and animals involved are happy, why fuck with that
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
Neuter Knut.
"Er. Wasn't it financially irresponsible of the zoo not to use Knut's money properly? He made that joint millions! Now they are just putting him out, because he's no longer young and cuddly anymore."
Fuckin' A right MK! Maybe Britney can use him for her "Circus" tour. Never mind. We've seen how Britney treats her animals, not to mention her children.
"This ain't rock n roll. This is genocide!"
I think all us Dlisted hoes should pony up some cash and adopt Knut! We can take turns sharing custody. Michael K can be his main hoe though.
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The government of the United States is not in any sense founded upon the Christian religion. -John Adams
Love Anderson and your cam suggestion is flippin' genius!
Oh, and never make the mistake of seizuring on the streets of Frankfurt. You'll get no assistance. They will just walk on by with their overly waxed hair.
Germans doing this kind of thing does not suprize me. You've been there? They are cold.
That poor bear never did anything wrong; how can the zoo turn on him now after two years of mutual TLC? Hopefully a nicer zoo or preserve can care for him and give him a mate for bearly activities.
and @ putas: I agree w/your statement that I'd rather hang out w/animals than w/most people. Love my family and friends, but somebody has to watch over the innocent animals, from fuzzy bears to scaly snakes.
"Knut of Love!" hehehehe!!
"Trying is the first step towards failure."
So ... they didn't think of the coochie issue when Knut was a wee one?!?
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My wife won't get home till a quarter to four, can you give me a ride to the liquor store?
http://dumb-report.blogspot.com/
Submitted by madam ex on Thu, 12/04/2008 - 7:23pm.
That's awful, see the human species is the lowest form of scum.
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Yes, but they're tasty...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
How Fucken sad! Just last week i saw "black Beauty" for the first time and i'm still thinking about that shit....
I keep telling myself how messed it was what happened to that poor horse....*sniff sniff*
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"Home remedy #108: IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
Human greed knows no bounds. Whose noses did the money go up? Fuckfaces.
This break my heart. Sweet little Knut has had so much rejection and too much crap in his short life.
his innocence is only magnified by this horrible story. Then again I prefer the company of animals over most people. My husband and I both have lots of them at home. I hope some rich private zoo owner can help him. I assume it's much too late for him to safely live in the wild, right?
That's awful, see the human species is the lowest form of scum.
Damn, that's a lot of drama for a polar bear. Can the E True Hollywood story be far behind?
"Just wondering but how many of you bitches acctually read the book? because Im thinkin not many of you have the brain spain too read...."
-Mrs.Hardin21 on Twilight
What a bunch of jack-off fuckers.
Poor little guy, the Polar Bears are losing their habitat and now the ones being raised in captivity are becoming fiscally challenged?
Please.
SAVE KNUT!!! Put up a Polar Bear cam.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Knut can live with me in my cage. I have a coochie...yeah, it's not bear coochie, but tiger coochie is better than bear coochie...Don't believe me? When was the last time any of you hot whores were described as a "bear" in bed (well aside from you fat hairy gay hot whores)? No, it's always a TIGER! Yeah, cuz us tigers have the best coochie! Once you go tiger...
Aw, and how cute would a Knut/Tigerlilly cub be? What? it could happen! You human whores grow human ears on hairless mice backs, you sick fuckers, don't tell me you whores can help Knut be my baby daddy....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
so, he went from busting a knut to a busted knut?
that knuts!
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what a bunch of fucking nazis. this sucks asshole.
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"I'm pretty sure I asked you to pick up some Pecan Sandies."
Those dumb Krout sluts! Knut was their meal ticket, I'll take Knut in and find him a ho.
One of you photoshop talents make a Knut with bandana pic for your avie.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Thu, 12/04/2008 - 6:21pm.
"Knut of Love." God, I love you MK!
EXACTLY MY THOUGHT !
MK, will you marry me ?
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Recently, a woman in England paid over 17 000 $ for her cat to spend 6 days in an oxygen tent to cure its paralyzed larynx. The cat showed its gratitude by briefly holding eye contact...
I still want to know how they wasted all that money. What, it's all gone? And how is it that the Central Park Zoo can afford to keep its polar bear and the Germans can't? I know they eat a lot, but come on...
I have $5 I'm willing to put toward a "Save Knut" fund. Who's with me?
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"Her voice sounds like a goat in heat..." - Balenciaga Bitch on Sarah Palin (10/6/08).
Wild idea (without any research whatsoever): How about let him loose somewhere to see how he does? He might adapt or might not. He doesn't have much of a future now as it is.