The Hottest Bitch At The Marley & Me Premiere
The premiere of Marley & Me in Los Angeles last night belonged to the real star of the movie, Clive the dog. Clive is the main bitch who played Marley opposite that naked lady and the dude who looks like he got into a fight with a frying pan and lost. Speaking of the naked lady, methinks Jennifer Aniston used Clive as inspiration for her "give doggy a bone" pose on GQ. And yes, that's Jennifer in the black dress below. I know, you can hardly recognize her with clothes on!
Speaking of, Jenny's naked ass was what everyone was asking about during last night's premiere. Jenny said, "I wasn't trying to make any statement." Cut to Clive yawning and then licking his no-nuts area. Of course, she was trying to make a statement. The statement being: LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME!
When UsWeekly asked Jenny's lump of moldy caca boyfriend, John Mayer, about the pictures, he pulled out his portable stage, threw on a top hat, grabbed his cane, did a little tap dance number and then said, "If I have a problem with that cover, I should just pack up the Toyota and head out of town. I'm just gonna get ready to put my knuckles in the air for it. No, don't make me hold it - you're pimping me out! Because when I touch it, angels die."
He should get out of town anyway and immediately head to the nearest Chinese restaurant to serve soggy dumplings. I mean, he already has the outfit for it.
Here's a few more others who came out to celebrate Clive's big night including Courtney Cox who looks like she's been spending a lot of time with Demi Moore's private plastic surgeon.
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LOVE ANDERSON
Haha, I had to re-read it about 5 times to be sure what I was seeing. What confused me was the
"yet Jolie just has to flaunt the babies (that Jen couldn't give Brad)on a cover of a magazine in order to get her payday!" part. That Jen couldn't give Brad kids part really through me for a loop.
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Pimpcessa on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 4:42pm
HEY SLUT!
I think K2 was being sarcastic, having a faux loon moment.
I did it yesterday on the GQ thread.
BAWK BAWK HEN LOVER!
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
K2 on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 4:14pm.
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 4:06pm.
"YET, Jen isn't the one that snagged $18 million for posing with 3 biological children !!!!"
Please elaborate.
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you're joking right?
gotta feel for Jen - she has to take her clothes off on GQ to get paid and yet Jolie just has to flaunt the babies (that Jen couldn't give Brad)on a cover of a magazine in order to get her payday!
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This is not K2 - not the one that I have grown to know on this blog. Somethings very fishy - K2 would never say that about JA. Is it possible for someone to steal your name on this site??
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
"Holie"
Damn that's clever. I never even thought of it. It nicely blends the ho with the holy.
Heeyyyy, y'all got paychecks from Huvane?
Well damn, I thought we were in it for the glory and team spirit. Also because of our useless ovaries, our love of patheticness and overall bitter attitudes.
Oh, btw, i clicked over to US Magazines site last night, they have a poll who people think will win the Golden Globe for best actress, um, Skeletina had 9.013%, Anne Hathaway was leading with 28%, followed by Kate Winslet with about 24% and the other one had about the same as Skeletina.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
I love Clive, for reals.
Submitted by K2 on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 4:14pm.
I thought she got like 12 million or something and posed with all of the kids. I thought you might have been talking about a NEW photoshoot, and I was all *gag*
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 4:06pm.
"YET, Jen isn't the one that snagged $18 million for posing with 3 biological children !!!!"
Please elaborate.
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you're joking right?
gotta feel for Jen - she has to take her clothes off on GQ to get paid and yet Jolie just has to flaunt the babies (that Jen couldn't give Brad)on a cover of a magazine in order to get her payday!
I want my f*cking check for dissing them both and playing double agent in all this mess!
I really, really think they're both terrible examples of what a 'real woman' should be.
Angelina and Jen are basically the same for impressionable young women: do anything to stay the thinnest you can without kicking the bucket and, most importantly, don't forget that being good at your 'real' job - i.e: acting - is not quite as important as staying in the headlines.
Oh look, people arguing over Jennifer Aniston? Say it isn't true!
Sweetas!!! When did we acquire this new loon, or has she been around for a while??
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Submitted by Pimpcessa on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 3:57pm.
stefystef
Honestly, Jennifer Aniston's PR firm really needs to stop paying people to post nice things about Jennifer to make it seem like she has this amazing fan base. It is almost embarrassing.
This ladies and gents is the mark of the LOON!!! I can't believe you left out the "dried up childless ugly......" crap that usually is the next thing you folks say. It really just kills you that she's doing fine after her "Pitt-stop
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I told you guys (about 20 posts back) that this chic was a douchebag! Stefystef use to hang out on the perez site. Super nut.
Hell yeah TwoDrink! Anything to get out of the basement! Let's all get our one coat on, it's chilly. lol
Pimpcessa - 'sup sistah? :)
K2 - that's ok, there's always the Jolie-pitt foundation...lol.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1172613656
Hey Pimpcessa! Sweetas! It's Friday, let's all cash in our Huvane checks and party it up. The milk is on me. Wow, that sounds raunchy, but as MK put's it...it stays.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1172613656
Hey guys! The jig is up - the braniac stefystef figured us out. Actually, we're not a bunch of people getting checks, but one seriously bored basement dwelling fugly bearded lady in size 50 mom jeans and we work for donuts. Oh, and barren and big-chinned. Just thought I'd clear that up.
Submitted by Pimpcessa on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 4:02pm.
Wazzup Two Drink, K2 and LOVE ANDERSON...and all the rest of you dlisters I'm forgeting to mention right now. Wow I'm so glad we were all hired by Huvane and are getting regular checks Jen to help with the holiday bills!!
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Shit! Christmas is two weeks away and that bitch still hasn't sent me my check. NOTHING in life is done for free HUVANE!!lol
"YET, Jen isn't the one that snagged $18 million for posing with 3 biological children !!!!"
Please elaborate.
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 3:56pm.
Are you honestly saying we're all part of Jennifer's PR firm? And we just happen to spend all day on here commenting on other celebrities just to throw you off? Listen, jackoff, please pull your head out of your ass and get a fucking CLUE.
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Yes, that is the brangeloonie mantra! Everything in Jen's life is done for PR (boyfriends, career decisions, fans). YET, Jen isn't the one that snagged $18 million for posing with 3 biological children !!!! TALK ABOUT PR BULLSHIT - not only are the Jolie-Pitts ruthless but manipulative too!!!
OMG PSL I'm sorry I left you out of my hello. And It's pretty funny that you and I were both referencing getting checks at the same time
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Oh yeah Two Drink♥! Holla for the young 'uns!! ;)
I can't wait till Brad leaves Angie for another woman or Angie leaves Brad for another woman, man, horse, whatever. And it won't be long. Some of Angie's rabid fans, she's like Queen of the Damned up in this bitch. :D
Wazzup Two Drink, K2 and LOVE ANDERSON...and all the rest of you dlisters I'm forgeting to mention right now. Wow I'm so glad we were all hired by Huvane and are getting regular checks Jen to help with the holiday bills!!
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Stoney and Pimpcessa:
you didn't get your check yet? I got mine yesterday, so I will posting all sorts of great stuff about Jen for the next few days!
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And though you don't believe that they do, They do come true; for did my dreams, come true when I looked at you
And maybe too, if you would believe, you too might be, overjoyed, over loved, over me
stefystef
Honestly, Jennifer Aniston's PR firm really needs to stop paying people to post nice things about Jennifer to make it seem like she has this amazing fan base. It is almost embarrassing.
This ladies and gents is the mark of the LOON!!! I can't believe you left out the "dried up childless ugly......" crap that usually is the next thing you folks say. It really just kills you that she's doing fine after her "Pitt-stop".
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I'm your huckleberry...BITCH!!
Submitted by redpoint_blackdot on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 3:43pm.
Submitted by peaches on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 3:21pm.
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My father cheated on my mother for years and put her through hell. I would feel like such a sack used condoms if i went and did something a la AJ. Something tells me AJ is a very angry person
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You know Jolie justifies her behavior with Brad because him and Jen had no kids. She would NEVER destroy a family, but f*ck the person that is married for 4 years with no children... all bets are off then. I think they continue to add kids to the circle because then it makes them feel as though it was "meant to be".
Are you honestly saying we're all part of Jennifer's PR firm? And we just happen to spend all day on here commenting on other celebrities just to throw you off? Listen, jackoff, please pull your head out of your ass and get a fucking CLUE.
Submitted by Two Drink Min on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 3:45pm.
Well, if that's what cougar looks like sign me up.
Jebus, I am 30 and I date younger all the time. Telling you it's the best.
ITA...i'm 36 and rarely date guys my age. i love the younger guys, always have.
In respons to *Submitted by No Words on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 2:12pm.*: Oh, I'm quite serious.
Honestly, Jennifer Aniston's PR firm really needs to stop paying people to post nice things about Jennifer to make it seem like she has this amazing fan base. It is almost embarrassing.
She lost her man. He left her ass because he was sick of her. If Pitt didn't want to go with Jolie, he wouldn't have left Aniston. Let's face it. He just wasn't into the Chinster anymore. Sometimes, the people you love stop loving you.
If I had her money and time on my hands, I guess I'd have a slammin' body too, since it is her JOB to look good. Makes up for her mediocre acting.
Well, if that's what cougar looks like sign me up.
Jebus, I am 30 and I date younger all the time. Telling you it's the best.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1172613656
Submitted by peaches on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 3:21pm.
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My father cheated on my mother for years and put her through hell. I would feel like such a sack used condoms if i went and did something a la AJ. Something tells me AJ is a very angry person.
Some people call it a Kaiser Blade, I call it a Sling Blade.
OMG i love Jen and John as a couple. i hope they last. he is so handsome. Jen looks amazing too!!!
Submitted by Hekki on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 2:27pm."You say that like it's a bad thing. So film actor > TV actor?"
Yes, that's what I'm saying... Some actors don't translate well on the big screen. Jennifer is an okay actress, nothing exceptional or special. She's basically the same role over and over again, even when she tries to be different.
Aniston is just making being a cougar be cool...
Submitted by K2 on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 2:43pm
and where are Brad & Jolie's REAL friends? Don't see any showing up to support them on the red carpet. George Clooney was no where to be found for this recent premiere and we all know Jolie has no friends, but even her brother wasn't around for the Changeling. Like living in that bubble much?
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Soooo glad you mentioned that. Clooney said a while back that he and Pitt had a falling out competing for the role of Henry Higgins in the remake of my fair lady, lol!!! I'll bet Holie brainwashed Brad into making it into a huge nasty competition. I'll bet it would have been a friendly competition otherwise!! I just KNOW in my Gut she instigated Brad into making this into something nasty and vicious! looks like this falling out is pretty serious!! As for our beloved James Haven, He recently reconciled with Papa Voight, and he supposedly has been trying to push Angelina into doing the same, and now she's turned against him for it! She knows she did exactly what she hated her father for doing to her mother years ago, and she won't forgive him because she secretly probably hates herself for being such a hypocrite!!! That's why she wont shut up about it!!!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Three things:
Jen looks feckin HOT.
John Mayer looks like he should be scraping lunch trays in the elementary cafeteria.
Courtney is stoned to the bone.
Much love Dlisters♥♥!!!
"If I have a problem with that cover, I should just pack up the Toyota and head out of town. I'm just gonna get ready to put my knuckles in the air for it. No, don't make me hold it - you're pimping me out! Because when I touch it, angels die."
-Translation:
I am John Mayer, I have no problem with free publicity for me, John Mayer.
I noticed how Skeletina and Brad have complained about media coverage and am hoping the JJ'ers translate this blurb to mean I, John Mayer still pee my pants and I, John Mayer, am the Devil that kicks puppies and likes to fuck Hens.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Submitted by peaches on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 2:25pm.
"If I have a problem with that cover, I should just pack up the Toyota and head out of town. I'm just gonna get ready to put my knuckles in the air for it. No, don't make me hold it - you're pimping me out! Because when I touch it, angels die."
can someone please translate what he means?? Oh BTW, anyone notice how Jen and Jon didn't take all these pics together as a couple like Brangelina? She took photos with Owen, and Why?? Because this is a movie premiere, and It's about the movie, and the movie's cast and crew, not about a celebrity couple!!! One thing no one can argue that Jen has that Angelina doesn't is CLASS!!!!!
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I certainly noticed that about Jen too. She is professional. She is spending time with her co-star NOT hamming it up with her best friend or boyfriend. I've never seen Jolie take photos with co-stars when Brad is with her and vice verse. Did we see even ONE photo of Brad with Cate for the premiere of Curious Case? NO. He just hung out with the attention whore and his folks. Must say, Brad & Jolie think very highly of themselves to not mingle with the rest of the cast. And where are Brad & Jolie's REAL friends? Don't see any showing up to support them on the red carpet. George Clooney was no where to be found for this recent premiere and we all know Jolie has no friends, but even her brother wasn't around for the Changeling. Like living in that bubble much?
"Maybe I'm the only person in the universe, but hell I'll admit that I think Jennifer Aniston is wayy (like 100 times) prettier and hotter than Angelina Jolie.
Ever seen Angelina's body? Is that really what guys like? "Ouch I sat on something sharp. Oh wait that's Ms Jolie!"
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No, I'm with you. Angie's bod was never anything to write home about.
Trouble is Jen's face is nothing to write home about either.
Both suck for different reasons and it's not just on the physical level that such truth can be found!
Roll on 2009 already, because this annoying triangle has taken over the last leg of poor ole 2008!
You think we'll get lucky and their - brangelina's and jen's - new year resolutions will included 'stay the f*ck out of the tabloids?'
Submitted by stefystef: "Jennifer will never be the caliber of a Angelina Jolie or Kate Winslet or Cate Blanchett or Amy Adams or any other Oscar-worthy actress. She is a TV actress and always will be."
You say that like it's a bad thing. So film actor > TV actor?
"If I have a problem with that cover, I should just pack up the Toyota and head out of town. I'm just gonna get ready to put my knuckles in the air for it. No, don't make me hold it - you're pimping me out! Because when I touch it, angels die."
can someone please translate what he means?? Oh BTW, anyone notice how Jen and Jon didn't take all these pics together as a couple like Brangelina? She took photos with Owen, and Why?? Because this is a movie premiere, and It's about the movie, and the movie's cast and crew, not about a celebrity couple!!! One thing noone can argue that Jen has that Angelina doesn't is CLASS!!!!!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Submitted by AttentionWhore on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 2:17pm.
Why aren't Jennifer A. & Owen W. a couple!?? t
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I know, right. These few pics are really making me want that to happen.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
I love that Jen did those nudie pics and dissed Holie in GQ all at once!!!! I'm thousands of miles away, but I canm see that vein in her forehead popping out from here!!! I'm not sure what she's gonna be more livid over, Jen making fun of her(and doing a good job at it!!LOL!!!) or those smokin-hot pics that now prove to the world Jen is better looking than she is!!! So did the loons at JJ shit bricks?? I can't go look, because I simply can't stomach it!!! All in all, Ladies and genttleman, this is how you get revenge on someone who fucks with you!!! You laugh at them, and look fuckin' fabulous while you do it!!!!! Go Jen!! And I nominate Clive the Dog for Hot slut of the day!
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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
John Mayer is seething in thumbnail 18 because everybody likes the dog better than him. Jealous hater!
Why aren't Jennifer A. & Owen W. a couple!?? this makes total sense.
Plus, just think of all the badass nicknames we can make outta those two names :D
Yeah, while we are at it, let's compare Jolie to Dench. AJ has zero depth. If it isn't slut, crazy or something of that ilk, she is lost.
She could never pull off an Iris or an Elizabeth...PLEASE!
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1172613656
What's wrong with being a Television Actress?
And yeah - Angie doesn't go on that list at ALL.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
"Jennifer will never be the caliber of a Angelina Jolie or Kate Winslet or Cate Blanchett or Amy Adams or any other Oscar-worthy actress. She is a TV actress and always will be."
What.The.Fuck?
Angelina Jolie compared to Kate Winslet or Cate Blanchett is fuckery, pure and simple. Not even close.
Jennifer has made some movies that I actually like, unlike Hagalina.
who the hell is Amy Adams?
and Angie Jo DOES NOT belong on that list!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
It's too bad some women can't just age gracefully. Courtney would look much better with laugh lines than that putty face. I do have to hand it to Jennifer('s surgeon/dermatologist), whatever work she has had done is very natural. She really needs to stop tanning though.
Submitted by The Sunshine Gang: "That's such a flattering hair color on Jen. Why don't more women go for the eye pleasing, honey blond instead of the GARISH, white, toxic looking blonde?"
Yes! There are lots of different shades of blonde, and the only people who look good with platinum blonde are the people who were born with it. There are so many warm, glowy darker blonde shades that flatter the complexion and go with brown eyes. Either there are lots of idiot colorists out there, or women going nuts with the Clairol.
Submitted by Two Drink Min on Fri, 12/12/2008 - 1:53pm.
Hmmm, ok...Jolie only won her Oscar by being her own psycho self. Shit, ask me to play a self-obesessed, bi-sexual alcoholic and I could win an Oscar too. Not that hard when you don't have to act.
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HAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAAAAA!