Better Late Than Never, I Guess
Ultimate drunktard Tara Reid is now working her way up the 12 steps to staying relevant by checking herself into a little known rehab facility known as Promises Malibu. I guess Celebrity Rehab was all booked up?
Her spokeswhore told People, "Tara Reid has checked herself into Promises Treatment Center. We appreciate your respect to her and her family's privacy at this time."
The spokeswhore wouldn't say what she's being treated for. That's probably because the list is endless and nobody really has that kind of time. The better question would be, "What isn't the bitch addicted to?"
While she's in there, she should also have a contractor, Ty Pennington, a few set decorators, the bomb squad and Bob the Builder come in to look at her war zone tummy. While she's detoxing, she might as well fix the monster on her belly.
And because Tara's in the tank, the booze industry is going to take a big hit, so we need to do our part! This weekend, for every 1 cocktail you drink, drink 6 more for Tara!
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olleh! olleh!!
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What's the soup today?
Cream of bullshit.
HELLO!!!!
*echoes* hello...hello...hello
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by Baked Ham on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 2:04am.
I have to fly to Italy in the morning bitches. Which one of you bitches is reqeusting my add on myspace.
Yeah, and I have a ticket on the Space Shuttle.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by TITS on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 2:13am.
Harvey's Bristol Cream,
"It's downright upright!"
I'm, too turd an lazy to read all the comments. But anyone else think this rehab thing is actually a publicity stunt? Maybe she's looking for non-dick-sucking roles now, and this is a way to get her in the news. It worked for Britney, right?
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by Baked Ham on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 2:04am.
I have to fly to Italy in the morning bitches. Which one of you bitches is reqeusting my add on myspace.
**
are you a forum person by any chance?
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What's the soup today?
Cream of bullshit.
Submitted by TITS on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 2:09am.
No.
Ryan Seacrest is also ready to go at a moment's notice, his shit is already packed.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Harvey's Bristol Cream,
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oh man i love that shit. on ice.
my kidney don't like it nearly as much as my tastebuds.
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What's the soup today?
Cream of bullshit.
Submitted by KD on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:43am.
Farrah- did I ever tell you that one of my contacts in Argentina said I can come down there to work for him if I ever decide to move there? That could be pretty sweet. Argentina sounds awesome, too.
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I'll go too!!
I live my life always ready to be packed and ready to go in 24 hours. for good reasons - not bad. shut up tv.
+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+
What's the soup today?
Cream of bullshit.
I have to fly to Italy in the morning bitches. Which one of you bitches is reqeusting my add on myspace.
Submitted by Baked Ham on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:43am.
am I talking to myself here? LOL!!!!!!!!! isnt it ironic, doncha think
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I see you but are you gonna help with the Benji Madden mystery or what? Camon! Catch up already! It's Benji. I'm pretty damn sure.
On that note I'm freshly scrubbed and all in my jammies (nekkid). Nite, chillens:)
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
Damn I drink more during the hollydaze. *hic* I tell myself that the alcohol kills the cold and flu viruses, therefore I am able to do all my slavelike holiday hostess duties with no illnesses. Egg Nog, glog, Harvey's Bristol Cream, Rumpelminze, bring it on! *hic*
WTH is Tara doing, going into rehab during the drinky-drank Xmas season? She has lousy timing.
I think Tara has no life. I bet she reads blogs 20 hours a day.
Submitted by Farrah on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:55am.
as if
Nite, Farrah, hurry back hon!
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:51am.
Submitted by Farrah on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:50am.
LOL, that was me!
Thanks for the ride, lady.
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good! at least now we know it was no idiotic troll, but a gentleman.
You're such a sweetheart!
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I'm in no hurry, you go run and tell your friends i'm losing touch...
Glow worms, glow worms, glow worms, glow worms *fades*
lmao ignoring the obvious. It's after 1am. I need to do autopsies in the morning. lol
OK, gots to go nigh-night now! Have a good'n!
Submitted by Farrah on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:50am.
LOL, that was me!
Thanks for the ride, lady.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
ok, beeshes, gotta go. I can't even type anymore.
be good, don't be talking shit about me, i'm like Santa...
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I'm in no hurry, you go run and tell your friends i'm losing touch...
There are sooo many Benji madden fan clubs on facebooks. There is I heart benji madden, Benji madden pwns your soul, Benji Madden makes the world to 'round, etc. One of my faves is "Save Benji Madden" and shows a pic of him with Paris. But my all time fave is the one that say BENJI MADDEN IS SEX. LMAO! True dat!
Submitted by KD on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:43am.
Farrah- did I ever tell you that one of my contacts in Argentina said I can come down there to work for him if I ever decide to move there? That could be pretty sweet. Argentina sounds awesome, too
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Buenos Aires is very nice, but hectic. And like all South American countries, you gotta be VERY careful. Our penitentiaty system is not good at all.They'll kill you for ANYTHING.
Last year, at a red light, some punk broke my car's window and tried to grap my purse.
I thought: hells to the no, bitch, and grab the purse, his arm and dragged him untill he started beggin me to let go..
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I'm in no hurry, you go run and tell your friends i'm losing touch...
Submitted by TITS on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:42am.
I think Tigerlilly is an actual tiger. To type as well as she does without opposable thumbs is an accomplishment that should be lauded at every opportunity.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
*sigh* The one that got away was from Chile *sigh*. He ended up down there with my BFF from HS years later, actually. It didn't last, thankfully:)
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
Farrah- did I ever tell you that one of my contacts in Argentina said I can come down there to work for him if I ever decide to move there? That could be pretty sweet. Argentina sounds awesome, too.
Submitted by KD on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:38am.
Farrah- are you really blonde...or are you fakely blonde? I was born a towhead, but now my hair is a really dark blonde.
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that super blond would be the magic of chemicals.My natural hair is a darker, kinda ginger blonde.
@Sibsi: CHILE, MININA!
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I'm in no hurry, you go run and tell your friends i'm losing touch...
am I talking to myself here? LOL!!!!!!!!! isnt it ironic, doncha think
I think James Haven is tigerlilly. Same clever wittiness.
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What's the soup today?
Cream of bullshit.
Man, Snowy or someone needs to start a Benji Madden fan club on FAcebook. Or is there one already??
TEH EASTER BENJI!!!
G'night, Sheeps~
@ KD: I cannot remember the details! All I know is she can speak Portuguese.
Come to think of it, many d-listers can speak several languages quite well, which makes me jealous, or really just elated to be posting along people apt enough to communicate in more than one language.
Anywho... are we still talking about Tara? Benji? Or...
Did we move on to James Heaven?
I wish for James to be real.
ETA:
F*ck me and my slowness again!~
Just read your post, Farrah! I love Chile too. Always wanted to visit it. So many nice and warm Chilean folks I ran into while living abroad make me think it's one of those places I wanna visit before I kick the bucket.
Nite, Sheepsie!
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
Submitted by Farrah on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:29am.
Submitted by Sheeps on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:15am.
OK, good. It's not important to me WHO he is, just that no one believes it's really him. (I mixed cold meds with cheap Cali wine.....)
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Sheeps, we have James Haven, remember? i don't think anyone believes it's THE JH, but we play along!
it's just a game!
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No, it ain't! I thought it was but now I know.
It's him.
He sent us this:
WOW. I can NOT find that link he posted. It was his management company. Anybody...?
And Dayum, hos! We got competition!
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendI...
And, apparently, Paris is 'grossed out' by the idea of anyone dating him after her. Um...shouldn't that be the other way around, somehow...?
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
Farrah- are you really blonde...or are you fakely blonde? I was born a towhead, but now my hair is a really dark blonde.
omg lol he just emailed me!
Submitted by Sibsi on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:27am.
Dude, THE BENJI MADDEN?? Let me just warn you
Or have you met Farrah on different locations? To this date, she won't tell me which country she's from in South America! And I must know.
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oh, KD is talking about a little YouTube vid i made of my dogs. In a super high pitched voice (treats)
It's beautiful Chile where i come from. How do you think i learned Portuguese? LOl!
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I'm in no hurry, you go run and tell your friends i'm losing touch...
Public Service Announcement: Don't pay attention to much dat I be saying tonight. I done had the PURPLE DRANK!
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:30am.
@Sheeps:
If it helps any I have still not heard ONE song by Good Charlotte. Unless it was by accident. =)
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YOU ARE SO BUSTED!
I'm telling on you next time he's here.
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What's the soup today?
Cream of bullshit.
Submitted by Farrah on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:29am.
I'm convinced there are people on this site who think BM and JH are real, like Santa Claus.
Night, Farrah.
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Travel with Chinese Girl. Want fantastic Chinese trip with pretty Chinese lady? Find her now!
Sibsi- no I'm not in South America. I am in the frigid north. Why don't you just ask Farrah where she's from. Does she not want you to know? I don't know where she's from, I just know where she's at. It might not be the same.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:25am.
Seriously, I get confused when they're NOT slagging on BM.
Yup. Have you heard Good Charlotte? No, I mean recently?
I'm outtie. Night, all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Travel with Chinese Girl. Want fantastic Chinese trip with pretty Chinese lady? Find her now!
@Sheeps:
If it helps any I have still not heard ONE song by Good Charlotte. Unless it was by accident. =)
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:19am.
No one invented the vibrator, it was willed into existence.
***
ah you clearly a creationist then.
+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+
What's the soup today?
Cream of bullshit.
Submitted by Sheeps on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:15am.
OK, good. It's not important to me WHO he is, just that no one believes it's really him. (I mixed cold meds with cheap Cali wine.....)
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Sheeps, we have James Haven, remember? i don't think anyone believes it's THE JH, but we play along!
it's just a game!
*******************************************
I'm in no hurry, you go run and tell your friends i'm losing touch...
Submitted by Sibsi on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:22am.
Noooooooooo. I hope no one thought I'm BM. I'm solely a pretend sheeps.
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Travel with Chinese Girl. Want fantastic Chinese trip with pretty Chinese lady? Find her now!
Benji is my bff's cousin's bff. he is real nice.
Submitted by KD on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:09am.
Hey goobers, what's going on all up in here toooniiiiggghht?
Dude, THE BENJI MADDEN?? Let me just warn you about FARRAH, you don't want to meet her in person cuz she has this super high voice that will bust your eardrums and maybe even pop your balls, too!
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Damn... just read this too.
When you're drunk and comments are in reverse order from what your tiny little brain is used to, you end up messing things up too.
Well, anywho... KD, are you in South America too? Or have you met Farrah on different locations? To this date, she won't tell me which country she's from in South America! And I must know.
*singing* Benji Claus, won't you cum down my chim-a-ney toniiiight!
Submitted by Sheeps on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:20am.
Seriously, I get confused when they're NOT slagging on BM.
***********************************************
I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by KD on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:21am.
I don't think it was Benji Madden, I KNOW it was! Benji, do you hear that??? I Belieeeeeeve!
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I, too, believe! I Belieeeeeeve!
♥ ThreadKilla!
Wow. Are you guys all on the same team?!
I Know Your Girlfriend Hates Me
Submitted by Sheeps on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:15am.
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 12/13/2008 - 1:09am.
OK, good. It's not important to me WHO he is, just that no one believes it's really him. (I mixed cold meds with cheap Cali wine.....)
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just read this. Yeah! I'm that slow tonight...
Really? Someone thought you were him? I'd figure Charlie Mason is Benji Maden if I had to make such a guess~