Non-Scientologist Will Smith Gave A Lot Of Money To Scientology
Roger Friedman of Fox News wrote about Will Smith's charitable foundation "just-released" tax returns. You probably can't get a hold of a personal tax return, but if you should happen to come across mine, all those large purchases I wrote off from an establishment called The Pink PussyCat were for research, ok? RESEARCH! Ask my no-no, he's my witness.
So Will Smith has shouted through the streets that he is not a Scientologist. He's just letting one slurp on his chode every now and again. Even though Will claims he's not in bed with the alien crazies (you know what I mean), he donated around $122,000 to Scientology this year. Specifically, he gave up $67k to the New York Rescue Workers Detoxification Fund, $50k to Scientologoy's Celebrity Centre in Hollywood and another $5k to something called ABLE which is a Scientology offshoot.
I'm guessing that ABLE stands for Anal Bottoms Lacking Enemas. It's the charity closest to Tommy's heart...or his asshole in this case.
Last year, Will and his beard donated some cash to a private school that teaches some Scientology shit.
What does this all mean? Well, it means that Will is either a barley water drinking, couch jumping, Xenu obsessing Scientologist or........or nothing. He's totally in the Don't Be Glib Club.